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Anaconda, Bailey Jay, and Bill Gates: Michael Jordan is retired with $40 million in endorsements, makes $178,100 a day, working or not If he sleeps 7 hours a night, he makes $52,000 every night while visions of sugarplums dance in his head If he goes to see a movie, it'll cost him $7.00, but he'll make $18,550 while he's there If he decides to have a 5 minute egg, he'll make $618 while boiling it He'll make $3,710 while watching 1 episode ofFRIEN p s He'll probably pay around $200 for a nice round of golf, but will be reimbursed $33,390 for that round If you were given a penny for every 10 dollars he made, you 'd be living comfortably at $65,000 a year He'll make about $19.60 while watching the 100 meter dash in the Olympics, and bout $15,600 during the Boston Marathon Assuming he puts the federal maximum of 15% of his income into a tax deferred account (40lk), his contributions will hit the federal cap of $9500 at 8:30 a.m. on January 1st While the common person is spending about $20 for a meal in his trendy Chicago restaurant, hell pul in about $5600 He makes $7,415/hr more than minimum wage This year, he'll make more than twice as much as all U.S. past presidents for all of their terms combined THE WHITE HOUSE CASHENCTON If he wanted to save up for a new Mercedes Maybach 57 s (S356,000) Cit would take him a whole 2 days Amazing isn't it? However... If Jordan saves 100% of his income for the next 450 years, he'll still have less than Bill Gates has today. Game over. Nerds win srsfunny:The Victory Of The Nerd

srsfunny:The Victory Of The Nerd

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Animals, Beautiful, and Crying: AN AVERAGE SATURDAY MORNING: WITH KIDS VS. WITHOUT KID WITH KIDS TIME WITHOUT KIDS Time to get up! Someone peed 6:00 You won't be getting up for 5 through his diaper and now your bed is covered in urine more You change a diaper and try to get the kid to sleep a little longer but now the he's yelling zoo animals and doing flips on the 6:30 You made some breakfast for your child, but today he decided he hates eggs. He's saying he wants "scrims" but you don't know what that means. He won't explain and just keeps yelling "scrims" louder and louder 7:00 Your pillow got a little warm so you turn it over and go back to You've now watched the same episode of Spongebob four times. One time you tried to change it over to the news and your kid shoved a spoon in the Tranquil visions dance in your 8:00 O0 head as the sweet embrace of slumber engulfs your resting body You attempt to take a shower but your kid keeps throwing can openers into the tub. You weren't aware that you hacd multiple can openers An angel comes down and gently kisses your forehead. Sleep well, sweet prince 8:30 You walk upstairs to your room, but didn't realize your kid was using the stairs as a stunt zone for Hot Wheels and you slip on one and nearly die as you tumble back down to the A hummingbird perches itself outside your window and sings a sweet lullaby. He blows you a kiss and soars away 9:00 You try to finally go to the bathroom, but forgot to lock the door so now your kid is crying because you won't let him dump sand in your lap. He dumps it on the dog instead. The sand was actually used cat litter You wake briefly to adjust your sleep number. (You bought an adjustable bed with all the disposable income you have from not having a kid.) 9:30 You hear laughter, which is almost more terrifying than crying. You walk in the living room to see your kid making 10:00 S Still sleeping soundly, like a puppy in front of a crackling snow angels in glue. There's no way you're getting your deposit back with a giant glue angel in the middle of the carpet Your kid doses off and you try to catch up on your favorite show You stir a little and check your texts. Your friend wants to go to brunch later. That sounds nice 30 more minutes of sleep and you'll get ready for that. Maybe go to mall later or ride go-karts Unfortunately, six minutes into it 10:30 there's a dramatic moment where the music builds and your kid is now wide-awake. (Screw You get everyone loaded into the car to go to the zoo, even though it's 90 degrees and so humid taxidermy is coming back to life. Your kid yells a racial slur he heard in a movie. Out of all the words he's heard, that's the only one that stuck. You wake up feeling refreshed and beautiful. You know what? It's Saturday. Let's just lie in the bed a while and watch a movie 11:00 srsfunny:Saturdays With Kids Vs. Without Kids

srsfunny:Saturdays With Kids Vs. Without Kids

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Being Alone, Chill, and Christmas: What do angels actually look like per the bible? Well, according to Ezekiel 1 they might look something like this. According to Daniel 10 something like this. According to lsaiah 6 In Ezekiel 10 Again in Ezekiel 10. Basically, when the people writing Scripture tried to describe what they saw when they saw an angel they run into the end of their imagination..they can never quite seem to fully explain it because they had trouble even comprehending what they saw, let alone being able to descrbe it to someone else revelation19 REAL Yeah, that's usually how people responded to seeing thern in the Bible There's a good reason why angels' standard greeting is Do not be afraid lused to listen to this radio show and one thing remember because it was so funny was a Christmas special where an angel showed up to tell the shepherds about the birth of Christ. The conversations went: Angel: "FEAR NOT Shepherds: "screaming Angel: "ISAID FEAR NOT Shepherds: "screaming LOUDER Angel: "WHAT PART OF FEAR NOT ARE YOU NOT UNDERSTANDING So demons are fallen angels but they don't look scary because theyre fallen, that's just what all angels look like.. Maybe that's why so many Christians see visions of Saints or the Virgin Mary insteadlike Jesus is all..no, no see being human made me realize sending Angels might not be the best idea. Idon't know if humans can handle this. So 'm gonna just send mom IM GONNA JUST SEND MOM God: The humans are scared Mary: Fine Im on it. Jesus: It's either Mom or the thousand eyed flaming wheel, Dad, do you really think the humans are gonna be chill with that when they're terrified of spiders already? God: Hey now, some of those spiders eat birds JesusDad. God: -.To be fair, Australian wildlife was my dark creation phase Australian wildlife was my dark creation phase Source: revelation 19 I guess angels are spooky.

I guess angels are spooky.

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Beautiful, Confused, and Cute: Ca geekandmisandry: ptenterprises: sheisquiteacommonfairy: kaylapocalypse: alithographica: alithographica: igyid: alithographica: Liberty x Justice for all. Why did you make liberty black and justice Muslim ? So here’s a distilled explanation of Why Liberty Is Black and Why Justice Is Muslim for those who are confused by the rampant inaccuracies. I’ll spell it out. Artistic license I live in the US and the political landscape is a dumpster fire. This is a protest piece. Liberty and Justice are concepts based loosely on ancient gods from a multiracial civilization. They are also deeply American concepts, and one of the great American dreams is that we are a melting pot of equality* for all races and religions. *Terms and conditions may apply. With the political point I’m trying to make, those 3 things are more than enough to justify this depiction. (Not that it even needs justification; it’s my personal art.) Educational sidebar: A nonwhite Lady Liberty is actually well-founded: Consider that The Statue of Liberty was originally proposed by the president of the French Emancipation Society. Prior to designing the Statue of Liberty, the sculptor had wanted to build a similar piece on the Suez Canal based on an Egyptian peasant woman. This never came to fruition but became an early iteration of our American Lady Liberty. Also there’s a black Lady Liberty coin coming soon (and this coin was a major design element for Lady Liberty here). But honestly ‘accuracy’ is beside the point. For all of the questions I’ve gotten on this piece, 90% relate to the race/religion of Liberty and Justice. People are bothered by the perceived inaccuracies there and totally skip over the gay part. I imagine that Liberty and Justice kissing should, maybe, also be considered inaccurate because that’s actually where I took the biggest leap. I literally had no reason to do it except it’s that cute and gay and political. I personified the judicial system coming to protect the liberties of people legislatively marginalized for their race or religion…as two queer women. Yet somehow that is not the most inaccurate part to people. No, god forbid anyone depict two //personified concepts// as nonwhite to represent and recognize the vast marginalization of POC in this country, particularly black and Muslim communities. p.s. the fact that Libertas and Iusticia are both conceived as female by Greeks and Romans is also arbitrary maybe one or both of them are actually transwomen or genderqueer or agender because everything cultural that you hold dear is a construct have a good day Hi @ghostlune​ I can see from your blog that we just think of the world in two fundamentally different ways but I don’t think that’s reason to not have a little historical education 1. French is a nationality, not a race. You can, in fact, be black and French. What I suspect you meant is “the Statue of Liberty is a white woman”. 2. Please refer to the “Educational sidebar” section above where I discuss why a nonwhite Liberty is pretty in-line with both the French and American visions of her. It has citations and everything. It’s cool, I promise. GET 👏THEM 👏ALITHOGRAPHICA👏 This is so beautiful and amazing. Given everything happening right now and what has been happening for pretty much time immemorial, having either Liberty or Justice be white would be not only inaccurate, but an insult to both. You’re made about her erasing the whiteness of “characters” that have never been able to be confirmed as white. How do you know what race the statue of liberty is? They are unpainted fucking statues, vague visual representatives of human ideals. If you think they default to white then all that says is that white is the default to you and everything else is viewed as being a deviation.
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