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Bad, Beautiful, and Beef: Really Bad Analogies Written by High School Students 1. Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center 2. He was as tall as a 6:3" tree 3. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master 4. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30 5. John and Mary had never met. They were like twa hummingbirds who had also never met. 6. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up 7. The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one siender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant. 8. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something 9. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever 10. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room temperature Canadian beef 11 The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM 12. The lamp just sat there, like an inanimate object <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://yamatohatake.tumblr.com/post/65245879994/jack-frost-the-incredibly-cold-i-think-you-mean" target="_blank">yamatohatake</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://jack-frost-the-incredibly-cold.tumblr.com/post/65202522033/i-think-you-mean-wonderful-analogies-these-are" target="_blank">jack-frost-the-incredibly-cold</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>I think you mean wonderful analogies these are beautiful</p> </blockquote> <p>please number 9 is the greatest thing i have ever read</p> </blockquote>

yamatohatake: jack-frost-the-incredibly-cold: I think you mean wonderful analogies these are beautiful please number 9 is the greatest th...

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