✝  Jesus Meme

πŸ€  NBA Memes

πŸ“¦  Starter Pack Meme

πŸ”₯  This Is Fine Meme

πŸ’  Mothers Day Meme

πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡¬  Do You Know The Way Meme

May 5 Memes

Julying
Julying
Swifting
Swifting
release date
release date
come
come
things
things
slated
slated
kelsey
kelsey
go to
go to
needed
needed
february
february 

    
                    

                

            
        
    

    
    
    






            

            
            

                

                    
                

                

                    
                    
                    

                        


	


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        worth the read: PS Products
 A 10
 PS Products Knuckle Blaster is a 950,000V Stun Gun
 with Batteries & Magnetic Leather Holster
 ea
 List Price: $69.99
 Price: $62.54
 Victory!
 By tdoog- May 5, 2013
 I purchased this after I was confronted by
 punks demanding that I hand over my money. I'm
 a relatively fit guy, but I was no match for them.
 That is when I realized that I need to protect
 myself. The day after I bought this product I went
 to the very same Wal-Mart parking lot when I was
 first mugged. I approached the group of
 hooligans standing outside the entrance,
 concealing my secret weapon.
 some
 I cooly asked "Remember me?"
 One of them looked up and said, "Have you com
 back to buy some Samoas or Thin Mints? My Gi
 Scout Troop needs to raise more money!"
 I replied with "you're not taking my money this
 time". "But sir, they're delicious!", she said.
 I whipped out my Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun hand
 and shouted "WRONG MOVE B****" The five giri
 scouts ran away screaming.
 As I pounded my chest in victory, I accidentally
 activated the stun gun and applied 950,000 Volts
 to my right nipple. I woke up 4 hours later to the
 sound of heavy footsteps. Those Girl Scouts had
 brought their fathers. But I was ready. I lunged at
 the largest one with a cry of "RAGGLE
 FRAGGLE!!!" and hit him in the stomach. He hit
 the ground harder than a fat kid on a jungle gym.
 As the others began to circle around me,I
 changed techniques. Holding both of my hands
 in tight fists, I rased my arms to my sides and
 initiated the helicopter spin. They all backed off,
 fearing my impressive RPM. After a while I
 started getting dizzy, and one of the fathers
 decided to try to tackle me. As he ran to me stood
 there, dizzy and queasy; time was going real
 slow. Then I remembered. I had eaten lunch at
 Chipotle and the burrito was fighting its way back
 up my stomach.
 I tuned toward my enemy and launched a stream
 of projectile vomit at him, knocking him to the
 ground. Then I started singing "Let the bodies hit
 the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies
 hit the.... FLOOO00RRR!!!"
 I grabbed my Knuckle Blasher Stun Gun and
 shoved it into my mouth, running headfirst at my
 foes, electrocuting them with my teeth.
 Eventually they were all unconscious, and I
 walked home victorious.
 2,144 of 2,383 people found this review helpful
worth the read
        

            
            

                
                
                    worth the read: PS Products
 A 10
 PS Products Knuckle Blaster is a 950,000V Stun Gun
 with Batteries & Magnetic Leather Holster
 ea
 List Price: $69.99
 Price: $62.54
 Victory!
 By tdoog- May 5, 2013
 I purchased this after I was confronted by
 punks demanding that I hand over my money. I'm
 a relatively fit guy, but I was no match for them.
 That is when I realized that I need to protect
 myself. The day after I bought this product I went
 to the very same Wal-Mart parking lot when I was
 first mugged. I approached the group of
 hooligans standing outside the entrance,
 concealing my secret weapon.
 some
 I cooly asked "Remember me?"
 One of them looked up and said, "Have you com
 back to buy some Samoas or Thin Mints? My Gi
 Scout Troop needs to raise more money!"
 I replied with "you're not taking my money this
 time". "But sir, they're delicious!", she said.
 I whipped out my Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun hand
 and shouted "WRONG MOVE B****" The five giri
 scouts ran away screaming.
 As I pounded my chest in victory, I accidentally
 activated the stun gun and applied 950,000 Volts
 to my right nipple. I woke up 4 hours later to the
 sound of heavy footsteps. Those Girl Scouts had
 brought their fathers. But I was ready. I lunged at
 the largest one with a cry of "RAGGLE
 FRAGGLE!!!" and hit him in the stomach. He hit
 the ground harder than a fat kid on a jungle gym.
 As the others began to circle around me,I
 changed techniques. Holding both of my hands
 in tight fists, I rased my arms to my sides and
 initiated the helicopter spin. They all backed off,
 fearing my impressive RPM. After a while I
 started getting dizzy, and one of the fathers
 decided to try to tackle me. As he ran to me stood
 there, dizzy and queasy; time was going real
 slow. Then I remembered. I had eaten lunch at
 Chipotle and the burrito was fighting its way back
 up my stomach.
 I tuned toward my enemy and launched a stream
 of projectile vomit at him, knocking him to the
 ground. Then I started singing "Let the bodies hit
 the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies
 hit the.... FLOOO00RRR!!!"
 I grabbed my Knuckle Blasher Stun Gun and
 shoved it into my mouth, running headfirst at my
 foes, electrocuting them with my teeth.
 Eventually they were all unconscious, and I
 walked home victorious.
 2,144 of 2,383 people found this review helpful
worth the read
                    
                
            

            
            
        

    

    

        
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        c-bassmeow:

There is now one democrat who can beat Trump, and it isn’t Hillary Clinton. Establishment democrats: you are shooting yourselves in the foot by insisting that she is electable. She can’t even beat a reality tv star who wants to have sex with his own daughter. There are now multiple independent polls proving her weakness and Donald’s slow climb up the polls. He is now turning to the center making himself more appealing to moderates. Vote Hillary if you want to have a president Trump. Vote for Bernie Sanders if you want a different outcome. Your cognitive dissonance can only take you so far, reality doesn’t care.

:) hey Democrats it’s me again.  vote for Bernie or else we are fucked. : @KyleKulinski
 First it was Fox NewS & everybody
 scoffed, then it was Rasmussen & people
 said it doesn't count, now it's ABC/ WaPo
 2016 GENERAL ELECTION VOTE
 PREFERENCE
 AMONG REGISTERED VOTERS
 70%
 60
 Hillary Clinton
 50%
 50%
 501 46%
 46%
 40
 43%
 44%
 44%
 41%
 Donald Trump
 30
 20
 9/10/15
 12/13/15
 3/6/16
 NOW
 abc NEWS
 SOURCE
 ABC News/Washington Post poll

 Bernae
 samhwils
 How to defeat Trump in November?
 Make sure Bernie Sanders has the
 Democratic nomination, not #RiskyHillary
 General
 Election: Trump
 vs. Sanders
 Sanders
 (D) +10.8
 39.5
 Trump (R)
 RCP POLL AVERAGE
 General
 vs. Clinton
 43.4
 Trump (R) +0.2
 43.2
 Clinton (D)
 POLITICS
 REAL
 POLITICS
 S Election: Trump
 54
 52
 50
 48
 46
 50
 48
 46
 42
 42
 40
 38
 40
 -10
 -15
 -20
 15
 10
 March
 April
 May
 5/23/16, 1:49 AM
 121 RETWEETS 141 LIKES

 RCP POLL AVERAGE
 General
 Election: Trump(D) +10.8
 vs. Sanders
 50.3
 REAL
 CLEAR
 Sanders
 39.5
 Trump (R)
 54
 52
 50
 48
 46
 42
 40
 38
 15
 10
 5
 March
 April
 May

 REAL
 CLEAR
 POLITICS
 RCP POLL AVERAGE
 General
 Election: Trump
 vs. Clinton
 43.4
 Trump (R) +0.2
 43.2
 Clinton (D)
 50
 48
 46
 42
 40
 0
 -10
 15
 20
 March
 April
 May
 121
 <? 141
c-bassmeow:

There is now one democrat who can beat Trump, and it isn’t Hillary Clinton. Establishment democrats: you are shooting yourselves in the foot by insisting that she is electable. She can’t even beat a reality tv star who wants to have sex with his own daughter. There are now multiple independent polls proving her weakness and Donald’s slow climb up the polls. He is now turning to the center making himself more appealing to moderates. Vote Hillary if you want to have a president Trump. Vote for Bernie Sanders if you want a different outcome. Your cognitive dissonance can only take you so far, reality doesn’t care.

:) hey Democrats it’s me again.  vote for Bernie or else we are fucked. 
        

            
            

                
                
                    c-bassmeow:

There is now one democrat who can beat Trump, and it isn’t Hillary Clinton. Establishment democrats: you are shooting yourselves in the foot by insisting that she is electable. She can’t even beat a reality tv star who wants to have sex with his own daughter. There are now multiple independent polls proving her weakness and Donald’s slow climb up the polls. He is now turning to the center making himself more appealing to moderates. Vote Hillary if you want to have a president Trump. Vote for Bernie Sanders if you want a different outcome. Your cognitive dissonance can only take you so far, reality doesn’t care.

:) hey Democrats it’s me again.  vote for Bernie or else we are fucked. : @KyleKulinski
 First it was Fox NewS & everybody
 scoffed, then it was Rasmussen & people
 said it doesn't count, now it's ABC/ WaPo
 2016 GENERAL ELECTION VOTE
 PREFERENCE
 AMONG REGISTERED VOTERS
 70%
 60
 Hillary Clinton
 50%
 50%
 501 46%
 46%
 40
 43%
 44%
 44%
 41%
 Donald Trump
 30
 20
 9/10/15
 12/13/15
 3/6/16
 NOW
 abc NEWS
 SOURCE
 ABC News/Washington Post poll

 Bernae
 samhwils
 How to defeat Trump in November?
 Make sure Bernie Sanders has the
 Democratic nomination, not #RiskyHillary
 General
 Election: Trump
 vs. Sanders
 Sanders
 (D) +10.8
 39.5
 Trump (R)
 RCP POLL AVERAGE
 General
 vs. Clinton
 43.4
 Trump (R) +0.2
 43.2
 Clinton (D)
 POLITICS
 REAL
 POLITICS
 S Election: Trump
 54
 52
 50
 48
 46
 50
 48
 46
 42
 42
 40
 38
 40
 -10
 -15
 -20
 15
 10
 March
 April
 May
 5/23/16, 1:49 AM
 121 RETWEETS 141 LIKES

 RCP POLL AVERAGE
 General
 Election: Trump(D) +10.8
 vs. Sanders
 50.3
 REAL
 CLEAR
 Sanders
 39.5
 Trump (R)
 54
 52
 50
 48
 46
 42
 40
 38
 15
 10
 5
 March
 April
 May

 REAL
 CLEAR
 POLITICS
 RCP POLL AVERAGE
 General
 Election: Trump
 vs. Clinton
 43.4
 Trump (R) +0.2
 43.2
 Clinton (D)
 50
 48
 46
 42
 40
 0
 -10
 15
 20
 March
 April
 May
 121
 <? 141
c-bassmeow:

There is now one democrat who can beat Trump, and it isn’t Hillary Clinton. Establishment democrats: you are shooting yourselves in the foot by insisting that she is electable. She can’t even beat a reality tv star who wants to have sex with his own daughter. There are now multiple independent polls proving her weakness and Donald’s slow climb up the polls. He is now turning to the center making himself more appealing to moderates. Vote Hillary if you want to have a president Trump. Vote for Bernie Sanders if you want a different outcome. Your cognitive dissonance can only take you so far, reality doesn’t care.

:) hey Democrats it’s me again.  vote for Bernie or else we are fucked. 
                    
                
            

            
                
                
c-bassmeow:

There is now one democrat who can beat Trump, and it isn’t Hillary Clinton. Establishment democrats: you are shooting yourse...

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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        nvinciblesummer:
Since y'all posted the goddamn date in the smallest print imaginable, that headline is from 2015 and the trans flag in her office is from 2019. She has apologized for her earlier statements and has said she is trying to learn about and better understand the trans community. There are no pure candidates and y'all should have been trying to get that through your thick skulls as soon as Trump was elected instead of trying to drag all the candidates through the mud for things they’re leaving behind now.: Kamala Harris
 @SenKamalaHarris
 Follow
 This week, we've proudly added the
 transgender flag in front of my office. I want
 all transgender Americans to know that I see
 you, I'm with you, and I stand by you in the
 fight for equality. #TransVisibilityWeek
 DREAMERS
 WELCOME
 HERE
 #DreamActNow
 4:34 PM-29 Mar 2019
 Sy AI, ΒΏ 6.
 ) ΰΈ”ΰΈΉ
 )
 561 Retweets 3. 193 Likes

 May 5. 2015 at 341 m EST by Chris Johnson
 Harris seeks to block gender
 reassignment for trans inmate
nvinciblesummer:
Since y'all posted the goddamn date in the smallest print imaginable, that headline is from 2015 and the trans flag in her office is from 2019. She has apologized for her earlier statements and has said she is trying to learn about and better understand the trans community. There are no pure candidates and y'all should have been trying to get that through your thick skulls as soon as Trump was elected instead of trying to drag all the candidates through the mud for things they’re leaving behind now.
        

            
            

                
                
                    nvinciblesummer:
Since y'all posted the goddamn date in the smallest print imaginable, that headline is from 2015 and the trans flag in her office is from 2019. She has apologized for her earlier statements and has said she is trying to learn about and better understand the trans community. There are no pure candidates and y'all should have been trying to get that through your thick skulls as soon as Trump was elected instead of trying to drag all the candidates through the mud for things they’re leaving behind now.: Kamala Harris
 @SenKamalaHarris
 Follow
 This week, we've proudly added the
 transgender flag in front of my office. I want
 all transgender Americans to know that I see
 you, I'm with you, and I stand by you in the
 fight for equality. #TransVisibilityWeek
 DREAMERS
 WELCOME
 HERE
 #DreamActNow
 4:34 PM-29 Mar 2019
 Sy AI, ΒΏ 6.
 ) ΰΈ”ΰΈΉ
 )
 561 Retweets 3. 193 Likes

 May 5. 2015 at 341 m EST by Chris Johnson
 Harris seeks to block gender
 reassignment for trans inmate
nvinciblesummer:
Since y'all posted the goddamn date in the smallest print imaginable, that headline is from 2015 and the trans flag in her office is from 2019. She has apologized for her earlier statements and has said she is trying to learn about and better understand the trans community. There are no pure candidates and y'all should have been trying to get that through your thick skulls as soon as Trump was elected instead of trying to drag all the candidates through the mud for things they’re leaving behind now.
                    
                
            

            
                
                
nvinciblesummer:
Since y'all posted the goddamn date in the smallest print imaginable, that headline is from 2015 and the trans flag in h...

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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        ufo-the-truth-is-out-there:
A month long Meteor Shower as Earth papasses through the tail of Halley’s Comet.
This will start around April 20th and continue until May 21st. The best time to view will be in the small hours between May 5 and 7, when the sky will be the darkest during the new Moon.
The specks and flecks you’ll be seeing are tiny pieces of debris from Halley’s Comet hitting Earth’s atmosphere and burning up. They’re called the Eta Aquarids as they appear to emerge from the constellation of Aquarius. At their peak time, you can expect to see up to 30 meteors per hour. If weather conditions are favorable.
The Eta Aquarids happens every year thanks to Halley’s comet. It takes the comet about 75 years to travel around the sun, but Earth passes through the tail of the comet around April/ May every year.Halley’s comet is projected to directly pass by the Earth again in 2061
: Earth Is About To Pass Through The Tail Of
 Halley's Comet, Giving Us A Month Of Meteor
 Showers
ufo-the-truth-is-out-there:
A month long Meteor Shower as Earth papasses through the tail of Halley’s Comet.
This will start around April 20th and continue until May 21st. The best time to view will be in the small hours between May 5 and 7, when the sky will be the darkest during the new Moon.
The specks and flecks you’ll be seeing are tiny pieces of debris from Halley’s Comet hitting Earth’s atmosphere and burning up. They’re called the Eta Aquarids as they appear to emerge from the constellation of Aquarius. At their peak time, you can expect to see up to 30 meteors per hour. If weather conditions are favorable.
The Eta Aquarids happens every year thanks to Halley’s comet. It takes the comet about 75 years to travel around the sun, but Earth passes through the tail of the comet around April/ May every year.Halley’s comet is projected to directly pass by the Earth again in 2061

        

            
            

                
                
                    ufo-the-truth-is-out-there:
A month long Meteor Shower as Earth papasses through the tail of Halley’s Comet.
This will start around April 20th and continue until May 21st. The best time to view will be in the small hours between May 5 and 7, when the sky will be the darkest during the new Moon.
The specks and flecks you’ll be seeing are tiny pieces of debris from Halley’s Comet hitting Earth’s atmosphere and burning up. They’re called the Eta Aquarids as they appear to emerge from the constellation of Aquarius. At their peak time, you can expect to see up to 30 meteors per hour. If weather conditions are favorable.
The Eta Aquarids happens every year thanks to Halley’s comet. It takes the comet about 75 years to travel around the sun, but Earth passes through the tail of the comet around April/ May every year.Halley’s comet is projected to directly pass by the Earth again in 2061
: Earth Is About To Pass Through The Tail Of
 Halley's Comet, Giving Us A Month Of Meteor
 Showers
ufo-the-truth-is-out-there:
A month long Meteor Shower as Earth papasses through the tail of Halley’s Comet.
This will start around April 20th and continue until May 21st. The best time to view will be in the small hours between May 5 and 7, when the sky will be the darkest during the new Moon.
The specks and flecks you’ll be seeing are tiny pieces of debris from Halley’s Comet hitting Earth’s atmosphere and burning up. They’re called the Eta Aquarids as they appear to emerge from the constellation of Aquarius. At their peak time, you can expect to see up to 30 meteors per hour. If weather conditions are favorable.
The Eta Aquarids happens every year thanks to Halley’s comet. It takes the comet about 75 years to travel around the sun, but Earth passes through the tail of the comet around April/ May every year.Halley’s comet is projected to directly pass by the Earth again in 2061

                    
                    

                    
                
            

            
            
        

    

    

        
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        <p>Father&rsquo;s will to educate his daughters (xpost from get motivated) via /r/wholesomememes <a href="http://ift.tt/2s170mr">http://ift.tt/2s170mr</a></p>: GMB Akash
 Like This Page May 5 Edited
 I never told my children what my job was. I never
 wanted them to feel ashamed because of me
 When my youngest daughter asked me what I did, I
 used to tell her hesitantly that I was a labourer
 Before I went back home every day, I used to take
 bath in public toilets so they did not get any hint of
 the work I was doing. I wanted to send my
 daughters to school, to educate them. I wanted
 them to stand in front of people with dignity. I never
 wanted anyone to look down upon them like how
 everyone did to me. People always humiliated me. I
 invested every penny of my earnings for my
 daughters' education. I never bought a new shirt,
 instead used the money for buying books for them.
 Respect, which is all I wanted them to earn for me. I
 was a cleaner. The day before the last date of my
 daughter's college admission, I could not manage
 to get her admission fees. I could not work that day
 I was sitting beside the rubbish, trying hard to hide
 my tears. All my coworkers were looking at me but
 no one came to speak to me I had failed and felt
 heartbroken. I had no idea how to face my
 daughter who would ask me about the admission
 fees once I got back home. I am born poor. I
 believed nothing good can happen to a poor
 person. After work all the cleaners came to me, sat
 beside and asked if I considered them as brothers
 Before I could answer, they handed me their one
 day's income. When I tried to refuse everyone; they
 confronted by saying, We will starve today if
 needed but our daughter has to go to college.'I
 couldn't reply them. That day I did not take a
 shower, I went back to my house like a cleaner. My
 daughter is going to finish her University very soon.
 Three of them do not let me go to work anymore
 She has a part time job and three of them do
 tuition. But often she takes me to my working place
 Feed all my coworkers along with me. They laugh
 and ask her why she feeds them so often. My
 daughter told them, All of you starved for me that
 day so l can become what I am today, pray for me
 that I can feed you all, every day Now a days l
 don't feel like I am a poor man. Whoever has such
 children, how can he be poor! Idris
 GMB E3 AKASH
<p>Father&rsquo;s will to educate his daughters (xpost from get motivated) via /r/wholesomememes <a href="http://ift.tt/2s170mr">http://ift.tt/2s170mr</a></p>
        

            
            

                
                
                    <p>Father&rsquo;s will to educate his daughters (xpost from get motivated) via /r/wholesomememes <a href="http://ift.tt/2s170mr">http://ift.tt/2s170mr</a></p>: GMB Akash
 Like This Page May 5 Edited
 I never told my children what my job was. I never
 wanted them to feel ashamed because of me
 When my youngest daughter asked me what I did, I
 used to tell her hesitantly that I was a labourer
 Before I went back home every day, I used to take
 bath in public toilets so they did not get any hint of
 the work I was doing. I wanted to send my
 daughters to school, to educate them. I wanted
 them to stand in front of people with dignity. I never
 wanted anyone to look down upon them like how
 everyone did to me. People always humiliated me. I
 invested every penny of my earnings for my
 daughters' education. I never bought a new shirt,
 instead used the money for buying books for them.
 Respect, which is all I wanted them to earn for me. I
 was a cleaner. The day before the last date of my
 daughter's college admission, I could not manage
 to get her admission fees. I could not work that day
 I was sitting beside the rubbish, trying hard to hide
 my tears. All my coworkers were looking at me but
 no one came to speak to me I had failed and felt
 heartbroken. I had no idea how to face my
 daughter who would ask me about the admission
 fees once I got back home. I am born poor. I
 believed nothing good can happen to a poor
 person. After work all the cleaners came to me, sat
 beside and asked if I considered them as brothers
 Before I could answer, they handed me their one
 day's income. When I tried to refuse everyone; they
 confronted by saying, We will starve today if
 needed but our daughter has to go to college.'I
 couldn't reply them. That day I did not take a
 shower, I went back to my house like a cleaner. My
 daughter is going to finish her University very soon.
 Three of them do not let me go to work anymore
 She has a part time job and three of them do
 tuition. But often she takes me to my working place
 Feed all my coworkers along with me. They laugh
 and ask her why she feeds them so often. My
 daughter told them, All of you starved for me that
 day so l can become what I am today, pray for me
 that I can feed you all, every day Now a days l
 don't feel like I am a poor man. Whoever has such
 children, how can he be poor! Idris
 GMB E3 AKASH
<p>Father&rsquo;s will to educate his daughters (xpost from get motivated) via /r/wholesomememes <a href="http://ift.tt/2s170mr">http://ift.tt/2s170mr</a></p>
                    
                
            

            
                
                
<p>Father&rsquo;s will to educate his daughters (xpost from get motivated) via /r/wholesomememes <a href="http://ift.tt/2s170mr">http://i...

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
Save