Feed
Feed

Feed

Have Mercy
Have Mercy

Have Mercy

cold-dead-hands
cold-dead-hands

cold-dead-hands

cartman
 cartman

cartman

no idea
 no idea

no idea

chow
 chow

chow

no
 no

no

firstly
firstly

firstly

merciful
merciful

merciful

moderate
moderate

moderate

🔥 Popular | Latest

Android, Bad, and Chill: When you tell your boyfriend a joke and the girl under his bed starts laughing too Never forget your girls favorite color. I can’t explain why dudes cheat but answer this, if you got money in your wallet and you find another dollar, are you not going to pick it up? Long story short my girl was out of town at her friends graduation. She left me a spear key to come feed her dog through out the week. I did the opposite, I treated him like Gary the snail. I had my side girl over bout to get busy. You know that deep gut feeling that tells you “ight chill out” but you ignore it? That be God mercy tryna save you. I’m catching some bomb neck, I’m talking about My meat going through a 5 star car wash when I hear a engine pull up out front. I look out the window and see my girl hop out a Uber. My side girl hid under the bed. I can tell She done this before. I slid under the sheets and fake sleep. My girl comes in talking about she changed her flight to come home sooner. Android users text take 3 business days. Babe starts asking me what’s her favorite color. I confidently blurted our magenta. Here comes her dog with a red thong in his mouth. Damn dogs can’t stick together? The FBI agent in her came out and starts interrogating me. Under her sheets I’m getting my dick rode by bed bugs during the interrogation process. Im tryna figure how to get this girl out this crib before I’m toast. My girl mid way through her sentence when you hear a sneeze under her bed. Within seconds my girl downloaded a heart beat sensor. I swear Android users got it good. This is now modern warfare. I watch my girl play search&destroy with my side chick. Side chicks heartless so she couldn’t detect her. Me being the real nigga I am had to flip the whole situation on her. “I don’t like how you assume me as a black man cheat, if you don’t trust me Idk about this” Tears in my eyes because it smelled like fish cakes and my eyes couldn’t take it. My girl felt bad and hit me with the double hand twist Gawk combo. My girl said she was coming back Sunday and came back Friday. She lied to me. I can’t date liars fam. I broke up with her. I’m single and my side girl still live under my ex bed. She text me from time to time for help. Shoulda had a escape rope.
Candy, Fire, and Irs: Jordan Adams @JordanKAdams97 My nephews Ethan's pre-k class made a cook book, and all the kids had to come up with all the recipesso much better than I could've imagined Ethan's Eggs Serving: 10 Prep time: 1 hour Cook time: 2 seconds Cost: $3.00 Ingredients: Pancakes Sugar Skittles Ca Where to buy: Texas Roadhouse Bpe Instructions: " first you put pancakes and then sugar and that's it. You can cook it, but you can go to my house andI will give you eggs because my mom makes eggs all the time. You can eat them with a spoon. Don't put anything on them because that's how you makes eggs, with nothing." irs Ariana's Macaroni serving: 3 people prep time: 5 minutes Cook time: 5 minutes a day h Cost: I think $2 Ingredients: Melted cheese Macaroni Appies trawberries, I like them because they are healthy Toys Backpack doll Where to buy: Walmart and Target and..wai... ! am trying to think..oh yeah....the mall. oot Instructions: you First you put the macaroni in the stove and now you put it in the end. Put it to the oven and put cheese and more melted eese. The oven has to be hot like fire....like a candle....like or birthdays. Now you need to tell everyone that its time to leave. And I have to leave because I am going to a party with a Swimming pool. My sister says, " Why do you go to the swimming pool ?" and I say, "Because l like it." Now I go home and I am waiting for it not to be hot and then my sister says," why do you do that? " its because you blow on the macaroni it wont be hot. You need to wait. Now its done!" Joe's Tacos ng: I don't even know Serv prea time: like 45 minutes Cook time: I think 55 minutes Cost. i don't even know aredients: Get the meat and lettuce at HEB Taco shells are there too Ihave cheese at my house so I don't have to go to the store and get more Lettuce Potato..wai..is it potato or tomato...no tomato Where to buy: I don't know where to get the other stuff Instructions: rst I change th onl on't actually know, I really don't remember anything. Can I s to cheesy roll ups? Because they are super easy. There is don't sur you need, white cheese, vellow cheese and tortilla. I o even want to make tacos anymore. I don't even know how. It is co hard to think about tacos. But i can make cheesy roll ups. They are su eeasy. They come from Taco Bell. I need yellow cheese and mke nt know where to buy the white cheese. I dont knomake them do them know how cheesy rollups are better because I kad wn ht jke hnymore. like them, but I love cheesy rollups more, J on't lijke beans t I made candy and it t y and it turned brown. I dont r me think...one time want taco ns because they make me throw up. My mom made me one time with beans and I threw up. Wait..../ know how atermelon it is easy....just buy the watermelon and eat it." eat a burrito one to make Sebastiän s Pancakes Serving: 3 Prep time: 10 minutes Cook time: 3 times Cost: $70 Se VW ngredients Salt and that's it In Fl Be Where to buy: Walmart Instructions: You get a thingy from the house and you put it inin the hot thingy. Turn on the hot thingy and it burns s0 you have to be careful. You make like, someth put it in it and it cooks. Then you get a plate an finish it. Don't leave the plate on the table , you have to throw it away in the sink or flies will get on ing and p <p><a href="http://radiant-mercy.tumblr.com/post/174063000555/tastefullyoffensive-via-jordankadams97-kids" class="tumblr_blog">radiant-mercy</a>:</p> <blockquote><p><a href="http://tumblr.tastefullyoffensive.com/post/174061849948/via-jordankadams97" class="tumblr_blog">tastefullyoffensive</a>:</p> <blockquote><p>(via <a href="https://twitter.com/JordanKAdams97/status/996838075128057858">JordanKAdams97</a>)</p></blockquote> <p>Kids are so hilarious I love it</p></blockquote>