🔥 Popular | Latest

Save
All because of Peanut M&Ms..: rue-by-another-name the biggest lie i ever told & how came to protect it my husband for years I have lived this lie telling everyone i am allergic to peanuts because i hate the smell of peanut butter and don't really like peanut butter that much but whenever i used to tell people i don't like peanut butter theyd get all defensive like "peanut butter is amazing how do you not like it?! and then rd have to go into this whole thing to defend my taste buds but then i got tired of it and started telling people that i'm just allergic to peanuts because that way it's not my fault that i hate the smell of peanut butter -it's now like I'm a sad little baby who will never get to taste peanut butter ever in her life and everyone feels sad for me but the problem is that i really love peanut m&ms and so now i can only eat peanut m&ms when im at home in secret. the only person who knows my lie is my husband and so at work this evening we had a small celebration for someone and they had peanut m&ms and i really wanted some but obviousty couldn't eat them in public because then people would know my peanut secret and so when we got home after work my husband tipped his jacket over and emptied his pockets and at least thirty or so peanut m&ms fell out of his pockets and he whispered, "i was sneakily accumulating them all night for you because i could see the pain in your eyes and if that isn't love then i don't know what is All because of Peanut M&Ms..

All because of Peanut M&Ms..

Save
My future husband better love me this much lol: rue-by-another-name the biggest lie iever told & how my husband came to protect it for years i have lived this lie telling everyone i am allergic to peanuts because i hate the smell of peanut butter and don't really like peanut butter that much but whenever i used to tell people i don't like peanut butter they'd get all defensive lke "peanut butter is amazing how do you not like it?!" and then i'd have to go into this whole thing to defend my taste buds but then i got tired of it and started telling people that i'm just allergic to peanuts because that way it's not my fault that i hate the smell of peanut butter it's now like i'm a sad little baby who will never get to taste peanut butter ever in her life and everyone feels sad for me. but the problem is that i really love peanut m&ms and so now i can only eat peanut m&ms when i'm at home in secret. the only person who knows my lie is my husband. and so at work this evening we had a small celebration for someone and they had peanut m&ms and i really wanted some but obviously couldn't eat them in public because then people would know my peanut secret and so when we got home after work my husband tipped his jacket over and emptied his pockets and at least thirty or so peanut m&ms fell out of his pockets and he whispered, "i was sneakily accumulating them all night for you because i could see the pain in your eyes. and if that isn't love then i don't know what is. My future husband better love me this much lol

My future husband better love me this much lol

Save
All because of Peanut M&Ms..: rue-by-another-name the biggest lie iever told & how my husband came to protect it for years i have lived this lie telling everyone i am allergic to peanuts because i hate the smell of peanut butter and don't really like peanut butter that much but whenever i used to tell people i don't like peanut butter they'd get all defensive like "peanut butter is amazing how do you not like it?!" and then i'd have to go into this whole thing to defend my taste buds but then i got tired of it and started telling people that i'm just allergic to peanuts because that way it's not my fault that i hate the smell of peanut butter it's now like i'm a sad little baby who will never get to taste peanut butter ever in her life and everyone feels sad for me. but the problem is that i really love peanut m&ms and so now i can only eat peanut m&ms when i'm at home in secret. the only person who knows my lie is my husband. and so at work this evening we had a small celebration for someone and they had peanut m&ms and i really wanted some but obviously couldn't eat them in public because then people would know my peanut secret and so when we got home after work my husband tipped his jacket over and emptied his pockets and at least thirty or so peanut m&ms fell out of his pockets and he whispered, "i was sneakily accumulating them all night for you because i could see the pain in your eyes. and if that isn't love then i don't know what is. All because of Peanut M&Ms..

All because of Peanut M&Ms..

Save
My future husband better love me this much lol: rue-by-another-name the biggest lie iever told & how my husband came to protect it for years i have lived this lie telling everyone i am allergic to peanuts because i hate the smell of peanut butter and don't really like peanut butter that much but whenever i used to tell people i don't like peanut butter they'd get all defensive lke "peanut butter is amazing how do you not like it?!" and then i'd have to go into this whole thing to defend my taste buds but then i got tired of it and started telling people that i'm just allergic to peanuts because that way it's not my fault that i hate the smell of peanut butter it's now like i'm a sad little baby who will never get to taste peanut butter ever in her life and everyone feels sad for me. but the problem is that i really love peanut m&ms and so now i can only eat peanut m&ms when i'm at home in secret. the only person who knows my lie is my husband. and so at work this evening we had a small celebration for someone and they had peanut m&ms and i really wanted some but obviously couldn't eat them in public because then people would know my peanut secret and so when we got home after work my husband tipped his jacket over and emptied his pockets and at least thirty or so peanut m&ms fell out of his pockets and he whispered, "i was sneakily accumulating them all night for you because i could see the pain in your eyes. and if that isn't love then i don't know what is. My future husband better love me this much lol

My future husband better love me this much lol

Save
All because of Peanut M&Ms..: rue-by-another-name the biggest lie iever told & how my husband came to protect it for years i have lived this lie telling everyone i am allergic to peanuts because i hate the smell of peanut butter and don't really like peanut butter that much but whenever i used to tell people i don't like peanut butter they'd get all defensive like "peanut butter is amazing how do you not like it?!" and then i'd have to go into this whole thing to defend my taste buds but then i got tired of it and started telling people that i'm just allergic to peanuts because that way it's not my fault that i hate the smell of peanut butter it's now like i'm a sad little baby who will never get to taste peanut butter ever in her life and everyone feels sad for me. but the problem is that i really love peanut m&ms and so now i can only eat peanut m&ms when i'm at home in secret. the only person who knows my lie is my husband. and so at work this evening we had a small celebration for someone and they had peanut m&ms and i really wanted some but obviously couldn't eat them in public because then people would know my peanut secret and so when we got home after work my husband tipped his jacket over and emptied his pockets and at least thirty or so peanut m&ms fell out of his pockets and he whispered, "i was sneakily accumulating them all night for you because i could see the pain in your eyes. and if that isn't love then i don't know what is. All because of Peanut M&Ms..

All because of Peanut M&Ms..

Save
My future husband better love me this much lol via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2zM1hD5: rue-by-another-name the biggest lie i ever told & how my husband came to protect it for years i have lived this lie telling everyone i am allergic to peanuts because i hate the smell of peanut butter and don't really like peanut butter that much but whenever i used to tell people i don't like peanut butter they'd get all defensive like "peanut butter is amazing how do you not like it?!" and then i'd have to go into this whole thing to defend my taste buds but then i got tired of it and started telling people that i'm just allergic to peanuts because that way it's not my fault that i hate the smell of peanut butter it's now like i'm a sad little baby who will never get to taste peanut butter ever in her life and everyone feels sad for me. but the problem is that i really love peanut m&ms and so now i can only eat peanut m&ms when i'm at home in secret. the only person who knows my lie is my husband. and so at work this evening we had a small celebration for someone and they had peanut m&ms and i really wanted some but obviously couldn't eat them in public because then people would know my peanut secret and so when we got home after work my husband tipped his jacket over and emptied his pockets and at least thirty or so peanut m&ms fell out of his pockets and he whispered. "i was sneakily accumulating them all night for you because i could see the pain in your eyes. and if that isn't love then i don't know what is. My future husband better love me this much lol via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2zM1hD5

My future husband better love me this much lol via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2zM1hD5

Save
thecheshirechloe: optometrictzedek: thewebcomicsreview: What’s funny is when you read articles about what happened, they never mention how Yahoo promised no ads only to put in ads anyway, pissing off and alienating users. They never mention that Verizon’s idea of “no adult content” was to implement poorly trained bots to clear the site of anything that looked like a tittie, which utterly failed at clearing the site of adult content or spam bots and instead forced millions of SFW users, especially artists, off the site. Instead they just say “Verizon’s decision to ban adult content upset and alienated many users.” Like no, that’s not even remotely what happened. I get new porn/spam bot follows daily even now, the problem is the worst its ever been, Verizon failed spectacularly at doing what they said they’d do (including protecting artists etc. from being targeted by their algorithms). The news wants the public to believe that we all threw a hissy fit and left en masse like a crowd of depraved neckbeards when tumblr banned adult content, driving the site into the ground as we left. Not a single article I’ve seen has discussed how Verizon/Yahoo is at fault. Not one. … do they not know that it’s their own fault?? Do they genuinely think that we’re all mad about the “lack of pornography”??? : Dan Primack @danprimack 3h Automattic paid peanuts for Tumblr. Source familiar puts it well south of $20 million. Reminder: Yahoo paid $1.1 billion for it. t Tumblr Verizon agrees to sell Tumblr to owner of Wordpress Yahoo acquired the company in 2013 for $1.1 billion. &axios.com 84 t1.1K 1.9K Dan Primack @danprimack 2h Again, just to be clear... emphasis on the "well below" $20 million... t39 448 Dan Primack @danprimack 3/Story updated: Price less than $3 million. 6:16 PM Aug 12, 2019 TweetDeck thecheshirechloe: optometrictzedek: thewebcomicsreview: What’s funny is when you read articles about what happened, they never mention how Yahoo promised no ads only to put in ads anyway, pissing off and alienating users. They never mention that Verizon’s idea of “no adult content” was to implement poorly trained bots to clear the site of anything that looked like a tittie, which utterly failed at clearing the site of adult content or spam bots and instead forced millions of SFW users, especially artists, off the site. Instead they just say “Verizon’s decision to ban adult content upset and alienated many users.” Like no, that’s not even remotely what happened. I get new porn/spam bot follows daily even now, the problem is the worst its ever been, Verizon failed spectacularly at doing what they said they’d do (including protecting artists etc. from being targeted by their algorithms). The news wants the public to believe that we all threw a hissy fit and left en masse like a crowd of depraved neckbeards when tumblr banned adult content, driving the site into the ground as we left. Not a single article I’ve seen has discussed how Verizon/Yahoo is at fault. Not one. … do they not know that it’s their own fault?? Do they genuinely think that we’re all mad about the “lack of pornography”???
Save
12000wheelsofseductivecheese: cutie-quinn: optometrictzedek: thewebcomicsreview: What’s funny is when you read articles about what happened, they never mention how Yahoo promised no ads only to put in ads anyway, pissing off and alienating users. They never mention that Verizon’s idea of “no adult content” was to implement poorly trained bots to clear the site of anything that looked like a tittie, which utterly failed at clearing the site of adult content or spam bots and instead forced millions of SFW users, especially artists, off the site. Instead they just say “Verizon’s decision to ban adult content upset and alienated many users.” Like no, that’s not even remotely what happened. I get new porn/spam bot follows daily even now, the problem is the worst its ever been, Verizon failed spectacularly at doing what they said they’d do (including protecting artists etc. from being targeted by their algorithms). The news wants the public to believe that we all threw a hissy fit and left en masse like a crowd of depraved neckbeards when tumblr banned adult content, driving the site into the ground as we left. Not a single article I’ve seen has discussed how Verizon/Yahoo is at fault. Not one. How cheap do you think we could buy it back for so we can put it back to normal? If we keep going at this rate then the Cards Against Humanity peeps probably COULD buy Tumblr.: Dan Primack @danprimack 3h Automattic paid peanuts for Tumblr. Source familiar puts it well south of $20 million. Reminder: Yahoo paid $1.1 billion for it. t Tumblr Verizon agrees to sell Tumblr to owner of Wordpress Yahoo acquired the company in 2013 for $1.1 billion. &axios.com 84 t1.1K 1.9K Dan Primack @danprimack 2h Again, just to be clear... emphasis on the "well below" $20 million... t39 448 Dan Primack @danprimack 3/Story updated: Price less than $3 million. 6:16 PM Aug 12, 2019 TweetDeck 12000wheelsofseductivecheese: cutie-quinn: optometrictzedek: thewebcomicsreview: What’s funny is when you read articles about what happened, they never mention how Yahoo promised no ads only to put in ads anyway, pissing off and alienating users. They never mention that Verizon’s idea of “no adult content” was to implement poorly trained bots to clear the site of anything that looked like a tittie, which utterly failed at clearing the site of adult content or spam bots and instead forced millions of SFW users, especially artists, off the site. Instead they just say “Verizon’s decision to ban adult content upset and alienated many users.” Like no, that’s not even remotely what happened. I get new porn/spam bot follows daily even now, the problem is the worst its ever been, Verizon failed spectacularly at doing what they said they’d do (including protecting artists etc. from being targeted by their algorithms). The news wants the public to believe that we all threw a hissy fit and left en masse like a crowd of depraved neckbeards when tumblr banned adult content, driving the site into the ground as we left. Not a single article I’ve seen has discussed how Verizon/Yahoo is at fault. Not one. How cheap do you think we could buy it back for so we can put it back to normal? If we keep going at this rate then the Cards Against Humanity peeps probably COULD buy Tumblr.
Save
divestedblackwoman: bichaotic: ophelias-revenge: unheavenlycreature: sugarkat: theambassadorposts: Why does it look like 4 support payments? 4 kids?? Or am I just reading shit wrong Four kids he wasn’t supporting until a court order demanded it. Possibly more than one. Honestly? Precisely zero sympathy for the dude. first of all that says he worked 80 hours before hitting ot so this is a biweekly check…anyway i went and found the twitter thread and in it the dude confirms his friend had 4 different kids by 4 different women. so please allow me to play the world’s smallest violin for him for being court mandated to help take care of the children he brought into this world :’( :’( clearly he didn’t decide to start strapping up after the first, second, or even third child so maybe number four will be enough to convince him Men really be out there knocking up women left right and center and telling women “but baby it feels so much better without a condom!” and voting for dudes who are banning abortion and they cry about how they can’t trust women on birth control and they’re abandoning kids all over the country but we’re supposed to cry when the court says pay for your kids in a system where welfare and WIC is fucking peanuts and won’t even cover breakfast daily. Fuck their crocodile tears! Where’s the laws for forced castrations after men are irresponsible and have two kids they don’t want to support? Men who don’t like abortion or don’t wanna pay child support can wear a condom or have a vasectomy!! No sympathy for deadbeats. Pay the fuck up. : 宋 Slay Follow @Foreverlighty My homeboy make 16 hundred a week but he only see $116.63 after child support... this is some fucked up stuff Earnings rate hours this tod Regular Overtime 18.5900 8.00 1.487.20 27,8850 4.88 136.08 Holiday Pay Paid Time Off Gross Pa $1,623.28 Deductions Statuto Federal Income Tax -149.03 Social Security Tax Medicare Tax 83.99 -19.65 Other -210.42 49.64 Core Health Dental Support Order Support Order Support Order Support Order 268.19 -231.79 233.30 -252.03 Vision 8.51 Net Pa Checking S116.73 -116.73 mother of kittens gi Follow @redheaded_wreck I'm glad he's seeing consequences for his actions of having irresponsible sex Maybe he should have kept his legs closed if he wasn't ready to take responsibility for his actions://// Slayd @Foreverlighty iMy homeboy make 16 hundred a week but he only see $116.63 after child support this is some fucked up stuff Show this thread 9:28 AM - 18 May 2019 11,656 Retweets 47,401 Likes C s divestedblackwoman: bichaotic: ophelias-revenge: unheavenlycreature: sugarkat: theambassadorposts: Why does it look like 4 support payments? 4 kids?? Or am I just reading shit wrong Four kids he wasn’t supporting until a court order demanded it. Possibly more than one. Honestly? Precisely zero sympathy for the dude. first of all that says he worked 80 hours before hitting ot so this is a biweekly check…anyway i went and found the twitter thread and in it the dude confirms his friend had 4 different kids by 4 different women. so please allow me to play the world’s smallest violin for him for being court mandated to help take care of the children he brought into this world :’( :’( clearly he didn’t decide to start strapping up after the first, second, or even third child so maybe number four will be enough to convince him Men really be out there knocking up women left right and center and telling women “but baby it feels so much better without a condom!” and voting for dudes who are banning abortion and they cry about how they can’t trust women on birth control and they’re abandoning kids all over the country but we’re supposed to cry when the court says pay for your kids in a system where welfare and WIC is fucking peanuts and won’t even cover breakfast daily. Fuck their crocodile tears! Where’s the laws for forced castrations after men are irresponsible and have two kids they don’t want to support? Men who don’t like abortion or don’t wanna pay child support can wear a condom or have a vasectomy!! No sympathy for deadbeats. Pay the fuck up.
Save
Some of these are not true, but wich ones?: 50 THINGS YOU DON'T NEED TO KNOW "1- RUBBER BANDS LAST LONGER WHEN REFRIGERATED 2-PEANUTS ARE ONE OF THE INGREDIENTS OF DYNAMITE 3- THERE ARE 293 WAYS TO MAKE CHANGE FOR A DOLLAR * 4-THE AVERAGE PERSON'S LEFT HAND DOES 56% OF THE TYPING 5- A SHARK IS THE ONLY FISH THAT CAN BLINK WITH BOTH EYES. 6- THERE ARE MORE CHICKENS THAN PEOPLE IN THE WORLD 7- THE LONGEST ONE-SYLLABLE WORD IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE IS "SCREECHED. 8- ON A CANADIAN TWO-DOLLAR BILL, THE FLAG FLYING OVER THE PARLIAMENT BUILDING IS AN AMERICAN FLAG. 9- ALL OF THE CLOCKS IN THE MOVIE "PULP FICTION" ARE STUCK ON 4:20 10 NO WORD IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE RHYMES WITH MONTH, ORANGE, SILVER OR PURPLE 11-"DREAMT IS THE ONLY ENGLISH WORD THAT ENDS IN THE LETTERS "MT 12-ALMONDS ARE A MEMBER OF THE PEACH FAMILY 13- THERE ARE ONLY 4 WORDS IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE WHICH END IN DOUS TREMENDOUS, HORRENDOUS, STUPENDOUS, AND HAZARDOUS 14-A CAT HAS 32 MUSCLES IN EACH EAR. " 15- AN OSTRICH'S EYE IS BIGGER THAN ITS BRAIN 16- TIGERS HAVE STRIPED SKIN, NOT JUST STRIPED FUR. " 17- IN MOST ADVERTISEMENTS, THE TIME DISPLAYED ON A WATCH IS 10:10 18- AL CAPONE'S BUSINESS CARD SAID HE WAS A USED FURNITURE DEALER " 19- THE CHARACTERS BERT & ERNIE ON SESAME STREET WERE NAMED AFTER BERT THE COP AND ERNIE THE TAXI DRIVER IN FRANK CAPRA'S "ITS A WONDERFULLIFE 20- A DRAGONFLY HAS A LIFE SPAN OF 1-6 MONTHS 21- A GOLDFISH HAS A MEMORY SPAN OF 3 SECONDS 22- ITS IMPOSSIBLE TO SNEEZE WITH YOUR EYES OPEN. 23- THE GIANT SQUID HAS THE LARGEST EYES IN THE WORLD 24- IN ENGLAND, THE SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE IS NOT ALLOWED TO SPEAK. 25- THE MICROWAVE WAS INVENTED AFTER A RESEARCHER WALKED BY A RADAR TUBE AND A CHOCOLATE BAR MELTED IN HIS POCKE 26- THE AVERAGE PERSON FALLS ASLEEP IN SEVEN MINUTES. 27- THERE ARE 336 DIMPLES ON A REGULATION GOLF BALL 28-THE AVERAGE HUMAN EATS 8 SPIDERS IN THEIR LIFETIME AT NIGHT 29- A COCKROACH CAN LIVE NINE DAYS WITHOUT ITS HEAD BEFORE IT STARVES TO DEATH 30- A POLAR BEAR'S SKIN IS BLACK. ITS FUR IS NOT WHITE, BUT ACTUALLY CLEAR. 31- ELVIS HAD A TWIN BROTHER NAMED AARON, WHO DIED AT BIRTH, WHICH IS WHY ELVIS MIDDLE NAME WAS SPELLED ARON: IN HONOR OF HIS BROTHER. IT IS ALSO MIS SPELLED ON HIS TOMB STONE 32- DONALD DUCK COMICS WERE BANNED IN FINLAND BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WEAR PANTS 33- MORE PEOPLE ARE KILLED BY DONKEYS ANNUALLY THAN ARE KILLED IN PLANE CRASHES. 34- STEWARDESSES IS THE LONGEST WORD TYPED WITH ONLY THE LEFT HAND. 35- SHAKESPEARE INVENTED THE WORDS "ASSASSINATION" AND "BUMP." 36- MARILYN MONROE HAD 6 TOES ON ONE FOOT. (NOT TRUE, WE'RE TOLDI) 37- IF YOU KEEP A GOLDFISH IN THE DARK ROOM, IT WILL EVENTUALLY TURN WHITE. 38-WOMEN BLINK NEARLY TWICE AS MUCH AS MEN 39- RIGHT-HANDED PEOPLE LIVE, ON AVERAGE, NINE YEARS LONGER THAN LEFT HANDED PEOPLE DO *40- THE SENTENCE "THE QUICK BROWN FOX JUMPS OVER THE LAZY DOG USES EVERY LETTER IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE *41- THE NAMES OF THE CONTINENTS ALL END WITH THE SAME LETTER WITH WHICH THEY START 42- TYPEWRITER IS THE LONGEST WORD THAT CAN BE MADE USING THE LETTERS ON ONLY ONE ROW OF THE KEYBOARD 43- THE WORD RACECAR AND KAYAK ARE THE SAME WHETHER THEY ARE READ LEFT TO RIGHT OR RIGHT TO LEFT 44- A SNAIL CAN SLEEP FOR 3 YEARS 45- AMERICAN AIRLINES SAVED $40,000 IN 1987 BY ELIMINATING ONE OLIVE FROM EACH SALAD SERVED IN FIRST-CLASS 46- THE ELECTRIC CHAIR WAS INVENTED BY A DENTIST 47- VATICAN CITY IS THE SMALLEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD WITH A POPULATION OF 1,000 AND A SIZE OF 108.7 ACRES 48-"I AM" IS THE SHORTEST COMPLETE SENTENCE IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE * 49- NO PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES WAS AN ONLY CHILD AND LAST AND DEFINITELY MOST IMPORTANT 50- THE AVERAGE CHOCOLATE BAR HAS 8 INSECTS LEGS IN IT l KNOW SO MUCH NOW lolmeme.th Some of these are not true, but wich ones?

Some of these are not true, but wich ones?

Save