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Click, Fucking, and Funny: 23+ Incredible Tumblr Posts That Are Must Watch the-man-who-sold-za-warudo Knight: I have trained in all forms of combat and weapons since birth. I cannot be bested Some horsecock motherfucker: Knight: What the fuck cerastes OH FUCK YESI GET TO TALK ABOUT LANTERN SHIELDS. For anyone seeing this post and wondering what kind of unholy heresy is currently having a blacksmithing orgy in front of their eyes, this is called a Lantern Shield. This came from, YOU GUESSED IT, fucking Italy, home of lunatic steel-weaving mother fuckers who often simply looked at each other and by each other, I mean their frenzied reflections in their shattered mirrors, and said "WHAT IF WE JUST DO THINGS", which is, as we all know, Aunt Jemima's recipe for success. Lantern Shields were very indicative: They were meant to be bucklers that could carry a lantern, oftentimes for night time duels Now, you're wondering, why carry a lantern on a night duel when it could just prove detrimental to your overall movement? Why, to blind the mother fucker, of coursel But, see, and this is the funny thing about Italy, when Italian blacksmiths realized that they could just add hook to a buckler, they noticed they could also just add whatever the thrice condemned shit they wanted to them, so they started forging stakes, spikes, and blades that protruded out of the buckler and gauntlet as additional defense against anyone who, due to the poor visibility of mist shrouded, dark blanketed nights, would just walk right into your handheld barracks. mean, nothing better than a bloke closing the distance to you losing an eye or six because they didn't consider you might just carry a porcupine on your arm, right? Some specimens exists, but these are not numerous. If you know of or possess an actual, physical Lantern Shield, congratulations, you probably have an item that likely killed. Source: the-man-who-sold-za-warudo Jan 26th, 2019 3,068 notes Sarcasm Goal Click to see full list 23+ Incredible Tumblr Posts That Are Must Watch #funny #memes #lol #humor #hilarious #tumblr
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Bad, Beautiful, and Cats: oo Verizon 9:06 AM Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Yesterday 3:24 PM Dad I've got some bad news. Kitty has been missing since last night. When your mom drove the neighborhood just now, she found her in the street near the house. Your mom is pretty emotional so please reach out when you can and offer your support Oh no. So sorry to hear this Sister Man. Just got off the phone with her-she's definitely very broken up about it. Give her our love in person when you get home, dad. And be sure to get the woman her groceries. Love you guys! Text Message Send oo Verizon 9:06 AM Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Yesterday 5:38 PM Dad Well your not going to believe this. After a beautiful burial service and words of remembrance from yours truly. We walked back in the house to begin our post-Kitty life. Out of habit I looked out the back window and guess who was staring back at me? You guessed it. We buried someone else's cat. I gues:s it's true-cats do have nine lives. Thanks for y words. All is better now. our kind Sister is this forreal?! Dad Would you like a photo? Text Message Send oo Verizon 9:06 AM ィ。 78% Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Would you like a photo? Sister YES What the actual fuck Sister Text Message Send oo Verizon 12:35 PM 8 73% Messages Mom Details Today 12:34 PM Oh, and BTW, I dug up the carcass and took it to our vet and it didn't have a chip in it. Because it's a rabbit. DO NOT tell the world about this. Message A S D F G H J K L 123 space return roaringstream: thecommonchick: THIS IS TOO MUCH 💀😂 “Do NOT tell the world about this”200,000 notes
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Bad, Beautiful, and Cats: oo Verizon 9:06 AM Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Yesterday 3:24 PM Dad I've got some bad news. Kitty has been missing since last night. When your mom drove the neighborhood just now, she found her in the street near the house. Your mom is pretty emotional so please reach out when you can and offer your support Oh no. So sorry to hear this Sister Man. Just got off the phone with her-she's definitely very broken up about it. Give her our love in person when you get home, dad. And be sure to get the woman her groceries. Love you guys! Text Message Send oo Verizon 9:06 AM Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Yesterday 5:38 PM Dad Well your not going to believe this. After a beautiful burial service and words of remembrance from yours truly. We walked back in the house to begin our post-Kitty life. Out of habit I looked out the back window and guess who was staring back at me? You guessed it. We buried someone else's cat. I gues:s it's true-cats do have nine lives. Thanks for y words. All is better now. our kind Sister is this forreal?! Dad Would you like a photo? Text Message Send oo Verizon 9:06 AM ィ。 78% Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Would you like a photo? Sister YES What the actual fuck Sister Text Message Send oo Verizon 12:35 PM 8 73% Messages Mom Details Today 12:34 PM Oh, and BTW, I dug up the carcass and took it to our vet and it didn't have a chip in it. Because it's a rabbit. DO NOT tell the world about this. Message A S D F G H J K L 123 space return roaringstream: thecommonchick: THIS IS TOO MUCH 💀😂 “Do NOT tell the world about this”200,000 notes
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Bad, Beautiful, and Cats: oo Verizon 9:06 AM Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Yesterday 3:24 PM Dad I've got some bad news. Kitty has been missing since last night. When your mom drove the neighborhood just now, she found her in the street near the house. Your mom is pretty emotional so please reach out when you can and offer your support Oh no. So sorry to hear this Sister Man. Just got off the phone with her-she's definitely very broken up about it. Give her our love in person when you get home, dad. And be sure to get the woman her groceries. Love you guys! Text Message Send oo Verizon 9:06 AM Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Yesterday 5:38 PM Dad Well your not going to believe this. After a beautiful burial service and words of remembrance from yours truly. We walked back in the house to begin our post-Kitty life. Out of habit I looked out the back window and guess who was staring back at me? You guessed it. We buried someone else's cat. I gues:s it's true-cats do have nine lives. Thanks for y words. All is better now. our kind Sister is this forreal?! Dad Would you like a photo? Text Message Send oo Verizon 9:06 AM ィ。 78% Messages Group MMS Details To: Sister, Dad Would you like a photo? Sister YES What the actual fuck Sister Text Message Send oo Verizon 12:35 PM 8 73% Messages Mom Details Today 12:34 PM Oh, and BTW, I dug up the carcass and took it to our vet and it didn't have a chip in it. Because it's a rabbit. DO NOT tell the world about this. Message A S D F G H J K L 123 space return goatyellsateverything: roaringstream: thecommonchick: THIS IS TOO MUCH 💀😂 “Do NOT tell the world about this”200,000 notes It didnt have a chip BECAUSE ITS A RABBIT! *DYING* Man how broken up do you gotta be to mistake a rabbit body for a cat? 😂😂😂
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Beautiful, Best Friend, and Bitch: screwdisimgoinhome: that-one-demonic-gay: that-one-demonic-gay: shootingstar912: orihime-maychan: oanimexliveo: halduron-brightwang: astrocmets: vertigo-potato: for-my-sea-of-lillies: acrylic–alien: hazycosmicjive77: bi-mabel-pines: waffelsareevil: daddy-and-his-princess-13: smalllilkitten: gingerbooknerdhufflepuff: flower-whisper: One of a Kind Life Like Enchanting Lunar Moon Light Lamp! Soft Light to give off the Moonlight Vibe for the surrounding area! Make someone’s Day with with one these Unique Lunar Moon Lamp! Currently on Sale and if you use the Code: MOON you get an additional Discount! = GET IT HERE = I WANT THIS I wish I could have it :( i’m fucking crying i NEED MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP I NEEEEED this! Adding to my endless Christmas list! I have one and they are dope!!! I got one of these over the break and it’s great! Sis gave me this for Christmas, it’s even more amazing than I thought cuz when you charge it it’s red like a blood moon, when you unplug it just touch a small silver circle, the only part non identical to the moon’s features, and it lights up, you can make it bright white or yellowish with a tap of the finger, hold the tip of your finger on the same spot to make it brighter or darker. And the details must be 3d printed cause when it lights up its a perfect replica of the moon, even the far side, not like the cheap lumpy knock offs at toy stores, this is a real detailed thoughtful peice of art.Best part, I get to carry the moon around with me to light my path at night, fall asleep reading by moonlight, and guess what…I actually have the moon that people have been fantasizing for centuries about capturing, lassoing, and bringing down to earth as a show of their love.I finally have the moon! My mom fucking got me this for christmas. I am shook my best friend got me this when she visited me irl for the first time and its the best thing ever! i have one of these and absolutely love it everything above is true, but the battery also lasts an incredibly long time! i havent charged mine in at least two weeks and despite leaving it on all night the past few nights the battery isnt dead yet. I want to sit on bed with all the lights off and hold the moon lamp, and basically think about life for a moment bc When I think about this,,, its like, make me free from Anxiety. So this would be beautiful I NEED THIS RN T_T Who else wants twenty of this babies? I ordered this bitch and I can’t fucking wait1! YES! THIS BITCH ARRIVED TODAY AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH! It also glows red slightly when it charges. Best 40 bucks I’ve even spent! I’ve got one its literally my favorite light it’s the absolute best
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