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astronomically-androngynous: sounddesignerjeans: princess-mint: alarajrogers: niambi: I’m???? Oh my God this actually explains so much. So there’s a known thing in the study of human psychology/sociology/what-have-you where men are known to, on average, rely entirely on their female romantic partner for emotional support. Bonding with other men is done at a more superficial level involving fun group activities and conversations about general subjects but rarely involves actually leaning on other men or being really honest about emotional problems. Men use alcohol to be able to lower their inhibitions enough to expose themselves emotionally to other men, but if you can’t get emotional support unless you’re drunk, you have a problem. So men need to have a woman in their lives to have anyone they can share their emotional needs and vulnerabilities with. However, since women are not socialized to fear sharing these things, women’s friendships with other women are heavily based on emotional support. If you can’t lean on her when you’re weak, she’s not your friend. To women, what friendship is is someone who listens to all your problems and keeps you company. So this disconnect men are suffering from is that they think that only a person who is having sex with you will share their emotions and expect support. That’s what a romantic partner does. But women think that’s what a friend does. So women do it for their romantic partners and their friends and expect a male friend to do it for them the same as a female friend would. This fools the male friend into thinking there must be something romantic there when there is not. This here is an example of patriarchy hurting everyone. Women have a much healthier approach to emotional support – they don’t die when widowed at nearly the rate that widowers die and they don’t suffer emotionally from divorce nearly as much even though they suffer much more financially, and this is because women don’t put all their emotional needs on one person. Women have a support network of other women. But men are trained to never share their emotions except with their wife or girlfriend, because that isn’t manly. So when she dies or leaves them, they have no one to turn to to help with the grief, causing higher rates of death, depression, alcoholism and general awfulness upon losing a romantic partner.  So men suffer terribly from being trained in this way. But women suffer in that they can’t reach out to male friends for basic friendship. I am not sure any man can comprehend how heartbreaking it is to realize that a guy you thought was your friend was really just trying to get into your pants. Friendship is real. It’s emotional, it’s important to us. We lean on our friends. Knowing that your friend was secretly seething with resentment when you were opening up to him and sharing your problems because he felt like he shouldn’t have to do that kind of emotional work for anyone not having sex with him, and he felt used by you for that reason, is horrible. And the fact that men can’t share emotional needs with other men means that lots of men who can’t get a girlfriend end up turning into horrible misogynistic people who think the world owes them the love of a woman, like it’s a commodity… because no one will die without sex. Masturbation exists. But people will die or suffer deep emotional trauma from having no one they can lean on emotionally. And men who are suffering deep emotional trauma, and have been trained to channel their personal trauma into rage because they can’t share it, become mass shooters, or rapists, or simply horrible misogynists. The only way to fix this is to teach boys it’s okay to love your friends. It’s okay to share your needs and your problems with your friends. It’s okay to lean on your friends, to hug your friends, to be weak with your friends. Only if this is okay for boys to do with their male friends can this problem be resolved… so men, this one’s on you. Women can’t fix this for you; you don’t listen to us about matters of what it means to be a man. Fix your own shit and teach your brothers and sons and friends that this is okay, or everyone suffers. The next time a guy says, “What? You don't want to be my friend?” I’ll text him this and then ask if he really wants to be friends or just have another potential girlfriend. y’all I am living for these analyses where the new way to fight the patriarchy is to teach men to love each other and themselves Im a communication student and can confirm the above is absolutely 100% accurate and it’s called agentic vs communal friendship theorized by Steven McCornack : Sprint Wi-Fi 2:25 PM Tweet tl saint lil rogue Retweeted Noob Saibot @Mommaafro So a woman's idea of being friends is being friends? Chef Nol @UR_SO_ COOL_NOL A woman's idea of "Let just be friends" is "Hey listen to all my problems and keep me company...while I have sex with someone else." 9/14/17, 9:26 AM 115 Retweets 168 Likes Tweet your reply 2 astronomically-androngynous: sounddesignerjeans: princess-mint: alarajrogers: niambi: I’m???? Oh my God this actually explains so much. So there’s a known thing in the study of human psychology/sociology/what-have-you where men are known to, on average, rely entirely on their female romantic partner for emotional support. Bonding with other men is done at a more superficial level involving fun group activities and conversations about general subjects but rarely involves actually leaning on other men or being really honest about emotional problems. Men use alcohol to be able to lower their inhibitions enough to expose themselves emotionally to other men, but if you can’t get emotional support unless you’re drunk, you have a problem. So men need to have a woman in their lives to have anyone they can share their emotional needs and vulnerabilities with. However, since women are not socialized to fear sharing these things, women’s friendships with other women are heavily based on emotional support. If you can’t lean on her when you’re weak, she’s not your friend. To women, what friendship is is someone who listens to all your problems and keeps you company. So this disconnect men are suffering from is that they think that only a person who is having sex with you will share their emotions and expect support. That’s what a romantic partner does. But women think that’s what a friend does. So women do it for their romantic partners and their friends and expect a male friend to do it for them the same as a female friend would. This fools the male friend into thinking there must be something romantic there when there is not. This here is an example of patriarchy hurting everyone. Women have a much healthier approach to emotional support – they don’t die when widowed at nearly the rate that widowers die and they don’t suffer emotionally from divorce nearly as much even though they suffer much more financially, and this is because women don’t put all their emotional needs on one person. Women have a support network of other women. But men are trained to never share their emotions except with their wife or girlfriend, because that isn’t manly. So when she dies or leaves them, they have no one to turn to to help with the grief, causing higher rates of death, depression, alcoholism and general awfulness upon losing a romantic partner.  So men suffer terribly from being trained in this way. But women suffer in that they can’t reach out to male friends for basic friendship. I am not sure any man can comprehend how heartbreaking it is to realize that a guy you thought was your friend was really just trying to get into your pants. Friendship is real. It’s emotional, it’s important to us. We lean on our friends. Knowing that your friend was secretly seething with resentment when you were opening up to him and sharing your problems because he felt like he shouldn’t have to do that kind of emotional work for anyone not having sex with him, and he felt used by you for that reason, is horrible. And the fact that men can’t share emotional needs with other men means that lots of men who can’t get a girlfriend end up turning into horrible misogynistic people who think the world owes them the love of a woman, like it’s a commodity… because no one will die without sex. Masturbation exists. But people will die or suffer deep emotional trauma from having no one they can lean on emotionally. And men who are suffering deep emotional trauma, and have been trained to channel their personal trauma into rage because they can’t share it, become mass shooters, or rapists, or simply horrible misogynists. The only way to fix this is to teach boys it’s okay to love your friends. It’s okay to share your needs and your problems with your friends. It’s okay to lean on your friends, to hug your friends, to be weak with your friends. Only if this is okay for boys to do with their male friends can this problem be resolved… so men, this one’s on you. Women can’t fix this for you; you don’t listen to us about matters of what it means to be a man. Fix your own shit and teach your brothers and sons and friends that this is okay, or everyone suffers. The next time a guy says, “What? You don't want to be my friend?” I’ll text him this and then ask if he really wants to be friends or just have another potential girlfriend. y’all I am living for these analyses where the new way to fight the patriarchy is to teach men to love each other and themselves Im a communication student and can confirm the above is absolutely 100% accurate and it’s called agentic vs communal friendship theorized by Steven McCornack
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petalssoft: I need to get out of hereI have never made any type of post like this and it’s going to be long and annoying but I just can’t fucking take this anymore. I’m Sophie, I am a 19 year old latina girl who has been living with an abusive man double my age for the last couple of years after running away. I feel trapped here and I have no means to leave safely at all. I’m mentally ill and on disability which doesn’t leave me with any room to get away from him and he is extremely controlling even when it comes to money and what I should have to owe him for living with him. I have no family to lean on and the friends I did have, he has cut me off completely from them. He’s smashed my phone when he got paranoid leaving me with nothing and no one. He monitored my phone and my social media so I have had to make separate accounts to try and hide him from seeing what I post. Not only that but he is racist, he hates women, believes in white supremacy, thinks that all girls should only be with men and give themselves to men whether they want to or not.. it just goes on and on and never stops. He always talks about genocide, thinks women ask for too much, ect. He has actually gone to jail in the past for assault. He threatens me with violence if I don’t do the things he asks for all the time and my mental health has gone downhill since I came here. There are so many things that have happened that I can’t even talk about.I am always being taken advantage of, threatened, manipulated into sex, into giving him money, just so that I won’t be out on the streets with no where to go. This type of life is making me want to kill myself if I can’t get a change soon but I am terrified of the thought of leaving him. I want to get a restraining order so that he can’t come after me, but if I do that I will have no place to live because I can’t afford the apartment I live in if he’s not here. I need help getting out. There is no way I can afford to pay a deposit, pet fee, and first months rent on a cheaper apartment with the income and type of life I have right now. He knows about how much money I bring in a month, and with my bills and everything I have very little. I know what I need is a lot, my goal is around $500 dollars even though that won’t begin to cover it, I don’t expect much help at all. Even a couple dollars I have that I can hide from him will hopefully add up.I was at risk of being homeless when I met him because of leaving my family. I thought that because he had issues too that he was a good person at heart but I can’t take the way that he treats me anymore, it has only gotten worse. If you don’t believe me, or think I shouldn’t be asking for this kind of help or think this is all my fault just block me. I have had too many people act like I am over exaggerating or that I’m crazy. I will just block you. my paypal email is sophimazziotti@gmail.com if you can help at all and if you cant i understand I know everyone is struggling and other people need more help than I do but I would be so thankful if you would please please reblog this post for me. Thank you. : SAMSUNg SAMSUNG petalssoft: I need to get out of hereI have never made any type of post like this and it’s going to be long and annoying but I just can’t fucking take this anymore. I’m Sophie, I am a 19 year old latina girl who has been living with an abusive man double my age for the last couple of years after running away. I feel trapped here and I have no means to leave safely at all. I’m mentally ill and on disability which doesn’t leave me with any room to get away from him and he is extremely controlling even when it comes to money and what I should have to owe him for living with him. I have no family to lean on and the friends I did have, he has cut me off completely from them. He’s smashed my phone when he got paranoid leaving me with nothing and no one. He monitored my phone and my social media so I have had to make separate accounts to try and hide him from seeing what I post. Not only that but he is racist, he hates women, believes in white supremacy, thinks that all girls should only be with men and give themselves to men whether they want to or not.. it just goes on and on and never stops. He always talks about genocide, thinks women ask for too much, ect. He has actually gone to jail in the past for assault. He threatens me with violence if I don’t do the things he asks for all the time and my mental health has gone downhill since I came here. There are so many things that have happened that I can’t even talk about.I am always being taken advantage of, threatened, manipulated into sex, into giving him money, just so that I won’t be out on the streets with no where to go. This type of life is making me want to kill myself if I can’t get a change soon but I am terrified of the thought of leaving him. I want to get a restraining order so that he can’t come after me, but if I do that I will have no place to live because I can’t afford the apartment I live in if he’s not here. I need help getting out. There is no way I can afford to pay a deposit, pet fee, and first months rent on a cheaper apartment with the income and type of life I have right now. He knows about how much money I bring in a month, and with my bills and everything I have very little. I know what I need is a lot, my goal is around $500 dollars even though that won’t begin to cover it, I don’t expect much help at all. Even a couple dollars I have that I can hide from him will hopefully add up.I was at risk of being homeless when I met him because of leaving my family. I thought that because he had issues too that he was a good person at heart but I can’t take the way that he treats me anymore, it has only gotten worse. If you don’t believe me, or think I shouldn’t be asking for this kind of help or think this is all my fault just block me. I have had too many people act like I am over exaggerating or that I’m crazy. I will just block you. my paypal email is sophimazziotti@gmail.com if you can help at all and if you cant i understand I know everyone is struggling and other people need more help than I do but I would be so thankful if you would please please reblog this post for me. Thank you.
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Friend vs Friendzone: So a woman's idea of being friends is A woman's idea of "Let just be friends" is Hey listen to all my problems and keep me niambi ers Oh my God this actually explains so much. So there's a known thing in the study of human psychology/sociology/what-have- you where men are known to, on average, rely entirely on their female romantic partner for emotional support. Bonding with other men is done at a more superficial level involving fun group activities and conversations about general subject s but rarely involves actually on about emotional problems. Men use alcohol to be able to lower their inhibitions enough to expose themselves emotionally to other men, but if you can't get emotional support unless you're drunk, you have a problem. So men need to have a woman in their lives to have anyone they can share their emotional needs and vulnerabilities with. However, since women are not socialized to fear sharing these things, women's friendships with other women are heavily based on emotional support. If you can't lean on her when you're weak, she's not your friend. To women, what friendship is is someone who listens to all your problems and keeps you company. So this disconnect men are suffering from is that they think that only a person who is having sex with you will share their emotions and expect support. That's what a romantic partner does. But women think that's what a friend does. So women do it for their romantic partners and their friends and expect a male friend to do it for them the same as a female friend would. This fools the male friend into thinking there must be something romantic there when there is not. This here is an example of patriarchy hurting everyone. Women have a much healthier approach to emotional support they don't die when widowed at nearly the rate that wid- owers die and they don't suffer emotionally from divorce nearly as much even though they suffer much more financially, and this is because women don't put all their emotional needs on one person. Women have a support network of other women. But men are trained to never share their emotions except with their wife or girlfriend, because that isn't manly. So when she dies or leaves them, they have no one to turn to to help with the grief, causing higher rates of death, depression, alcoholism and general awfulness upon losing a romantic partner So men suffer terribly from being trained in this way. But women suffer in that they can't reach out to male friends for basic friendship I am not sure any man can comprehend how heartbreaking it is to realize that a guy you thought was your friend was really just trying to get into your pants. Friendship is real. It's emotional, it's important to us. We lean on our friends. Knowing that your friend was secretly seething with resentment when you were opening up to him and sharing your problems because he felt like he shouldn't have to do that kind of emotional work for anyone not having sex with him, and he felt used by you for that reason, is horrible. And the fact that men can't share emotional needs with other men means that lots of men who can't get a girlfriend end up turning into horrible misogynistic people who think the worlid owes them the love of a woman, like it's a commodity... because no one will die without sex. Masturbation exists. But people will die or suffer deep emotional trauma from having no one they can lean on emotionally. And men who are suffering deep emotional trauma, and have been trained to channel their personal trauma into rage because they can't share it, become mass shooters, or rapists, or simply miS The only way to fix this is to teach boys it's okay to love your friends. It's okay to share your needs and your problems with your friends. It's okay to lean on your friends, to hug your friends, to be weak with your friends. Only if this is okay for boys to do with their male friends can this problem be resolved so men, this one's on you. Women can't fix this for you; you don't listen to us about matters of what it means to be a man. Fix your own shit and teach your brothers and sons and friends that this is okay, or everyone suffers. The next time a guy says, "What? You don't want to be my friend?" I'll text him this and then ask if he really wants to be friends or just have another potential girlfriend. fall-out-man Im a communication student and can confirm the above is absolutely 100% accurate and it's called Friend vs Friendzone
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Theres some good in this world, Mr. Frodo. And the LOTR films are three of them.: geniusorinsanity tumbl Follow xerem lotrfansaredorcs One overlooked thing that really sets the Lord of the Rings films apart from other franchises is how earnest they are Most movies are so afraid of being "cheesy" that whenever they say something like "friendship is the most powerful force in the world" they quickly undercut it with a joke to show We Don't Really Believe That!;) Even Disney films nowadays have the characters mock their own movie's tropes (if you start singing, I'm gonna throw up!") It's like winking at the camera: "See, audience? We know this is ridiculous! We're in on the joke!" But Lord of the Rings is just 12.5 hours of friendship and love being the most powerful forces in the world, played straight. Characters have conversations about how much their home and family and friends mean to them, how hope is eternal, how there is so much in the world that's worth living for.... and the film doesn't apologize for that. There's no winking at the audience about How Cheesy and Silly All This Is; it's just. Completely in earnest. And when Lord of the Rings does "lean on the fourth wall to talk about storytelling within the film, it's never to make jokes about How Ridiculous These Storytelling Tropes are (the way most films do).... but instead to talk about how valuable these stories can be. Like Sam's Speech at the end of the Two Towers the greatest stories are ones that give you something to believe in, give you hope, that help you see there are things in a bleak violent world that are worth living for nitrateglow Earnestness is so much cooler than all the hip cynicism in the world. You go LOTR lotrfansaredorcs LUIB loving and caring about things is in 2,759 notes Theres some good in this world, Mr. Frodo. And the LOTR films are three of them.

Theres some good in this world, Mr. Frodo. And the LOTR films are three of them.

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