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Blessed, Huh, and Sorry: Thread i received this comically large pencil as a gift several years ago and my first thought, understandably, was 'what the christ am i meant to do with this?' @oscarewilde 1d the 2nd thought i had was: I'm Quite Certain I Could Ruin Someone's Day With This. And so a while ago i took it in with me to a lecture, hoping against hope that whichever poor Fool was unfortunate enough to sit next to me might have forgotten or misplaced their writing implement 6 t1916 15.7K @oscarewilde 1d utilising The Pencil is also dependent on the person not using a laptop. So the chances of success are extraordinarily slim, and l've only managed to find suitable candidates three times in all of the dozens of occasions i've had The Pencil on my person 694 13.8K 4 @oscarewilde 1d i size up my target, watching them feign patting their pockets in vain for the ballpoint they so obviously left at home, and i wait, i wait for the blessed question... Do You Have A Pen I Could Borrow? t1 801 13.8K @oscarewilde 1d 'Oh, i say, 'I'm so sorry; I only have a pencil 'That's fine!'i hear them say, distantly now, as the blood is rushing to my ears and i can barely hear them. I maintain a straight face This is key to the delivery and the final blow 106 25K 10 @oscarewilde 1d I reach into my bag for The Pencil. The look of utter dumbfounded misery as i hand it to the victim is unparalleled in its sweetness. In an instant their eyes flicker through the 5 stages of grief, landing on acceptance, as they realise it's This or Nothing 101,627 26.5K 15 @oscarewilde 1d still maintaining that eye contact i smile, only the tiniest fraction, the unspoken words forming between us. 'What are you gonna do now, huh? You feeling lucky, kiddo? Buddy? Buckaroo? You gonna kick up a fuss in this silent lecture theatre? Huh Or will you take The Pencil?" t11,332 24.1K 14 @oscarewilde 1d they Always take the pencil 125 catchymemes: The Pencil

catchymemes: The Pencil