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God, Memes, and Single: May God introduce you to someone single and spiritually available before the end of this year...Say AMEN if you receive this!

May God introduce you to someone single and spiritually available before the end of this year...Say AMEN if you receive this!

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Anaconda, At-At, and Bad: theshitpostcalligrapher: morgan1yam: theshitpostcalligrapher: 99daysofr: theshitpostcalligrapher: theshitpostcalligrapher: it fuckin begins my dudes.  for expository context i started working on this bad boy at 1am whilst listening to a fight club audiobook for free on youtube and avoiding readings on international policy so u kno.  same as always.  #why would you dothis to yourself To test my abilities Ok hypothetically speaking how much would it cost for someone to commission something like this. about 3.8 souls on proper conversion rates, but I’m gonna start bidding at around $1500 CAD and we’ll go from there  Okay, so you’re pricing yourself waaaay low there! Not only for the cost of supplies, or time spent making it. But also for the cost on your soul and the cost of this level of quality shitmemeing.You are doing this by hand, and  In most cases, rates for book transcription are approximately $0.01 to $0.20 a word or line, $1 to $3 a page, $10 to $50 an hour, and $5,000 to $20,000 per project, depending on the difficulty of the project and the experience of the transcriptionist. Transcriptionist. Who would just be typing the words out on a keyboard. YOU ARE DOING IT PHYSICALLY. YOU ARE MAKING SHITPOST AAAART. This is effectively the Gregorian tomb of the bee movie, a potential master work. Also, you need to think of how much money you COULD be making during the time that you are spending working on this project. As well as how many months you want to not worry about snacks in the future, or having to pay off the carpel tunnel medication you’ll need for your wrist after this. (Health care is only mostly free.)TLDR: Start your bidding at at least 3 to 5 thousand… at the least. actually i redid the math on this one and you’re actually right. For commissions I charge 35 base plus 20 an hour, with higher base rates if it takes me more than a day in total (100 per day).I can usually do gothic calligraphy at a rate of about 330 characters an hour, give or take. the bee movie is about 40,683 characters in total, which totals me out at roughly 124 hours, rounding up. for just the hourly, that puts us at $2480, but the fact that that total time is over 5 days brings base fee up to 500 dollars. I use black india ink, which i could write whole encyclopedias with with just the 30 dollar bottle i bought 2 years ago, so that’s largely negligible. I use dip nibs which wear like motherfuckers and are always counted as sunk costs bc of how long their work life tends to be. The leather book cost me about 50 bucks after tax. There’s a Canadian tax thing called a “small supplier exemption” whereupon if you have a sole proprietorship entity (ie a small business/freelancing) that makes less than $30,000 a year (which i DEF DO NOT LMAO) you don’t need to register for GST/HST, which is why i don’t charge y’all taxes on stuff. Opportunity cost calculation is tricky, because as sole proprietorship, it’s difficult to quantify the potential gains lost. And in other employment, minimum in my province is 14/hour, and positions w/my degree usually start out at 20/hour anyways so thats a moot point. That totals us out at a starting bid, at cost, of $3030.00 CAD  and of course, for those who feel like it, there’s always a kofi that exists if you would like to donate to and take part in (spiritually at least) of the Tombe Of The Bee efforts
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Ass, Bitch, and Bones: lol just got to this small kickback they've been playing Mo bamba for the 5th time already My dog Tyreke put me on to a halloween party we went to over the weekend. Boy told me it’s from this white girl he met on tinder. I seen Get out. Boy was hard headed. He never met her but he wanted me to come with him to the party. So I went. Party was a L off the strength they was blasting logic from the door. You don’t do that.. Then the boy on the aux threw on Mo bamba. That shit be crumping when your myPlayer loading up in 2k. Literally all the white girls put down they pumpkin spice lattes and slid right out of thier uggs. I done seen them form the most congruent electric slide ever seen. I got called Jamal about 4 times and Tyrone twice. One girl was twerking and her knees caps were smacking together like a sword fight. That looks bloody painful mate. I seen this one slutty nurse pull up on me to throw it back. I received the most detrimental twerk from this girl Kathy. Kathy if you reading this go home and don’t come back. The booty was like some unseasoned chicken cutlets. I grabbed her sharp ass hip bones and tried thrusting for this twerk. I tried to catch a wine with a booty that had .2% booty fat. Felt like I was slapping my meat on a cutting board. By the 5th time the song came on the cops pulled up. It was a fight outside. When Sheck Wes said “Oh! Fuck! Shit! Bitch!” I felt that spiritually. Me and Tyreke fled the scene like 2 legendary Pokémon. Nigga had the nerve to play it in the car. I made him take the bus home. That boy Momba better win rookie of the year on God
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