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Bad, Confused, and Cute: toodrunktofindaurl my brother is getting married and i'm so excited to fulfill my destiny as the embarrassing drunk gay sister who flirts with the bride for the entire ceremony toodrunktofindaurl i'm gonna yell "RUN AWAY WITH ME" to her during the vows toodrunktofindaurl there are people out there genuinely worried that I'm gonna steal my brother's bride away the day of their wedding.. i'm laughing. I've known her since I was born, we just love annoying the shit out of my brother and this "you picked the wrong sibling" joke has been going on for as long as I can remember. The whole family is in on it. The three of us are super close, she's always been family. Also we are really bad at romantic weddings (my Mom wore jeans at my Dad's and hers, signed a bunch of papers and then got blackout and my brother and his girlfriend p won't even have a "real" ceremony, just a cele- bration between friends and family. I love my brother and he already knows I'm gonna pull some stupid stunt, it's what we do. His girl friend is usually the one to initiate these shitty jokes, I wouldn't be surprised if she was the one to stop the "ceremony" to say some shit like "WAIT THIS IS THE WRONG SIBLING please don't take any of this seriously Imao that said, i'm definitely showing up half naked to her bachelorette party as the "surprise strip- per" with a sash that says "the sibling your should be marrying" and a shitty plastic tiara toodrunktofindaurl UPDATE 1) for people confused about the "I've known her since I was born () she's always been family": She's the granddaughter of our parents' neighbors, we all grew up together and my brother and her have been in love since they were babies. He held her hand as she made her first steps, they even have a picture on their wall of the moment before she first tried to get up ITS OFFICIAL, I'M GONNA BE MY BROTHER'S BEST MAN. AND YOU KNOW WHAT THE BEST MAN DO? A SPEECH Everything is going according to plan vantwinblade If you are the best man you need to get a sword systlin This is true it's only logical. Source: toodrunktofindaurl 52,029 notes Thats so cute tbh
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Christmas, College, and Dumb: Another thing! If you live in a college dorm that has a polcoy against candles being lit in the rooms, and you want to light a menorah for Chanukah, seek out help advocating yourself from your local Chabad, Hillel, or other assorted Jewish organization. They know how to deal with this stuff and will help you work on a compromise with school officials. You have a right to celebrate Chanukah. neoacidic "my religion is more important than other people's safety!!" sorry but do you hear yourself? celebrate, if you must, but don't infringe upon others or think you're above the law (when the law is no unjust.) thinkherenow: surprisedentistry: femme-radicale: surprisedentistry: realsadjewishhours: keshetchai: 5779: keshetchai: 5779: today on Weird Goyische Meltdowns I have literally had my gentile neighbors start two actual real apartment fires in the last MONTH because they can’t keep an eye on their cooking, meanwhile I light candles ALL THE TIME AT HOME and never set ANYTHING ON FIRE BECAUSE I AM RIGHT FRIGGIN THERE. Do you know what I do with Chanukkah candles on?? I turn off my lights and watch them melt and maybe I do something with my hands but I keep an eye!!! On!!! THEM!!!! #… holy shit guys there’s LED lights for a reason #like if it’s that much of a danger just use LEDs for your decor lighting a menorah reeeeally is not “decor”  It’s NOT that much of a danger. I live in an “adult” neighborhood of apartments (i.e. Not with college students) and again, people have caused two fires this month while making breakfast. One fire burned down most of the building next door to mine. regular old adults using a microwave or stove! But when I light my candles for either Shabbat or Chanukkah I am WATCHING them. I have tin foil nearby, I have water nearby, my religious observances (which aren’t fulfilled by an LED light) are not, in my experience, the greatest fire hazard around. You know what is? People making breakfast people not cleaning LINT out of their dryer. Also LED lights do not fulfill the Jewish obligations that candles/oil do. We literally cannnot use LED lights please stop suggesting this. gentiles on this post have been weirdly convinced that they’re the only ones who know about decorative electronic menorahs and that they just need to educate the ignorant jews  What the fuck? If you want to have your candles go live somewhere those are allowed instead of putting others at risk and making everyone around cater for you. today on Weird Goyische Meltdowns The National Fire Protection Association reports “Between 2012-2016, U.S. fire departments responded to an average 170 home fires that started with Christmas trees per year. These fires caused an average of 4 deaths, 15 injuries, and $12 million in direct property damage annually.” but go off on the Jews for doing their thing. Hey everyone Id like to just speak up for my Jewish friends and followers and say y'all should stop being dumb fucks and respect Judaism and the people who observe it!!! You do not know more about thing relating to their religion than they do! You are not entitled to tell them to stop practicing their religion properly when they explain they have been doing it safely! Any fires caused by someones menorah is not at the fault of Jewish people! It is at the fault of that specific person not watching their candles! Same as if you dont watch a stove! Shut the fuck up or Ill punch you!To all my Jewish friends and followers: I apologise for these ignorant fools - light your candles and have a Happy Chanukah!!!
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