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A Dream, Christmas, and Instagram: cacen so at the bar in which I work, there's an unofficial rule that all of our door staff must have names that start with D or rhyme with 'doorman', which has led to me be- friending a trio of six foot four men with beards called Doorman Logan, Doorman Drew, and Doorman Dan now, let me tell you now that Doorman Dan is the abso- lute love of my life. I don't care that he's a decade older than me and has a fiance. you know when someone is so extraordinary or impossible to define that they're simply referred to as 'a character? that's Doorman Dan. now, before I get into his personality, let's describe his appearance. imagine the most stereotypical Scand inavian person ever: tall, white-blond, strong-jawed. now, add a heavy South Walian accent and an orange jumper. that's Doorman Dan. since meeting him last year, I've discovered .he once had a dream that he had a tattoo that said 'shit happens' on his left arsecheek, so when he woke up he decided he had to fulfil the prophecy and got it tattooed on his arse by a bloke called Junkie Jeff at 9AM .he forgot to call his girlfriend for three months while he was in the army, and was complet unaware they had broken up until he wishe happy Christmas and she responded with what the fuck Dan .accidentally married his army buddy in Vegas for thirty-six hours .he saw someone beating up a guy for being gay, and instead of jumping in and fighting back he decided to get absolutely bollock-naked and stand in front of the homophobe until he got freaked out and ran off .he has a millionare buddy who rings him up once a month for 'mystery adventures', one of which has resulted in Doorman Dan no longer being allowed inside any John Lewis shops .he is convinced the love of his life is not his fiancee, but a man named Ned. upon being asked who Ned is, he shrugged and responded with: "TII know when I meet him. .he runs an Instagram account dedicated to his pet rabbits and refuses to let people into the bar unless they follow him his fiancee booked a wedding venue before he even proposed. "I don't even know if I'm invited, truth be told." when he caught a couple having sex in our loos, he didn't want to intrude so he just gently knocked on the door and asked if they'd like a snack . .he has created his own non-alcoholic cocktail called Doorman's Sunrise because he feels left out being the only person on the dance floor without a drink when he's patrolling the bar I could honestly write a ten-season sitcom about him cacen BIG OL UPDATE: HE GOT MARRIED LAST WEEK!!!! zohbugg I need 10 seasons and a movie about the life of Doorman Dan thecheshirecass I look forward to reading more about the loving, polyamorous relationship he and his wife develop with Ned when they finally meet. fuckveahdiomedes What's the instagram for the rabbits, op? Source: cacen 114,993 notes The adventures of doorman dan
Fucking, Life, and School: DONNY CATES. @Doncates , Dec 11 I promise you dont really want to read a book where Eddie is doing fine and everything is awesome and everyone is happy. That book is boring and you will not like that book Or maybe you would. I dunno. I'm not writing that book symbisexual-disaster:*glances wearily at my 5,000 bookmarked fics in which everything is awesome and everyone is happy*  Honestly this just shows what a shallow understanding of story writing he has and I don’t know how he got to become a writer as a result of this.Conflict makes a story interesting but it’s pretty clear that a) he only has 1 idea of conflict (tragedy) and b) he sees no room for character growth (because anything other than tragedy is considered boring and irrelevant and therefore we never see characters put into different situations and he doesn’t have to write them react to anything other than tragedy).Showing Eddie and Venom doing well doesn’t even have to be the whole series (honestly I’d find that pretty boring too after several issues as much as I want to see Eddie and Venom grocery shopping or going to the farmer’s market). The point of doing so is a) character development and b) a break in the storyline from any current conflict. As much as peace/ trivial aspects of Eddie’s life will get boring after several issues, so will conflict. I’m really tired of seeing overblown issues left right and centre and absolutely no pause given to Eddie’s development (not to mention he’s regressing because of shitty writing).That one scene where Eddie’s speaking to V but seemingly himself when he’s eating noodles and V’s asking for a bloody steak? That’s the kind of shit I’m talking about. It’s literally 2 pages of Eddie speaking to himself, being very kind to V, then snapping back at a stranger who’s weirded out by him and he and V then proceed to have a conversation about innocence and stupidity. Not only does this show Eddie’s a dick in day-to-day life which contrasts with his ideas of being a good person and saving the innocent, it also shows V’s basic (but forming) ideas about human characteristics and personalities and Eddie has to do his best to help V understand innocent =/= stupid. That’s all it fucking took! 2 pages of a regular conversation between Eddie and V! Then you can get back to whatever conflict is happening!Donny Cates never graduated from the school of ‘I like these characters and I’m going to make them suffer’ and it shows.
Target, Tumblr, and Blog: happyamporafamily: so does this count as not drawing a character just standing in a void?? eheh;;

happyamporafamily: so does this count as not drawing a character just standing in a void?? eheh;;

America, Beautiful, and Crying: THE FOLLOWING PREVIEW HAS BEEN APPROVED FOR APPROPRIATE AUDIENCES BY THE MOTION PICTURE ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA, INC. www.filmratings.com www.mpaa.org itsyaspacemom: gay-emo-quotes: jackjames-exe: fanders-family-tree: analogical-trash: samthekoalabear: impulesiveroleplay: ikilihayir: sushinfood: knockoutliers: boost boost boost boost boost oh my god this is such an important movie oh my god im shaking so hard and crying i hadn’t seen the trailer until tonight like i’d heard so much naysaying from tumblr users who just dont understand how good how progressive how fucking progressive everything about this fucking movie is it needs to be received now. this movie could have spared me YEARS of pain. me and thousands of others like me. i’m in shock, i’m shaking, oh my fucking god there’s a movie about me and it’s beautiful, i can find myself in a character this is amazing Boost the fuck! GUYS @prinxietys @analogical-trash @thatsthat24 Omg yessssss This isn’t actually a misreblog, but this needs to be boosted because it’s so hecking awesome and everyone deserves to see this movie ❤️ I’m actually bawling this is so important and beautiful Theres a movie about being transgender About being a transgender man About family About the struggles that come with it This is so important This is amazing This is beautiful It wasn’t loading so I was like ?? What is it and I was getting excited then I just saw a clip of him doing sit ups and I went THREE GENERATIONSSS This movie is so wonderful omg guys I thought this is on netflix but YES! THIS!!! BOOST THIS!! @vldrocketeer @itsyaspacedad
Bad, Head, and Love: firesnaps I had someone tell me that dislike of Umbridge is usually from ingrained sexism toward female villains. I kind of stared in shock-I mean I love my lady villains I love nasty female villains. I love sneaky and clever female villains. I love female villains that wrap themselves up in what the patriarchy expects of them and uses those expectations to smash someone upside the head I tried to explain my hatred of Umbridge isn't that she's full of traditionally feminine attributes It's that she's lawful evil If you did an alignment chart, no one would represent lawful evil more thar Umbridge. I don't think there's ever been a character that better sums up lawful evil. And, to me, lawful evil is the most terrifying and disturbing evil there is To me, lawful evil is the shit that gets thousands of people killed while the person responsible walks away feeling like they did their duty Evil forces like Bellatrix and Voldemort are fairy tales. They're the bad guys a good guy can chase away with a sword or wand Umbridge is that evil that really does lurk in the hearts of men (and women). The realness, the plausibility of it, makes her amazingly uncomfortable So, yeah, I can't get as excited about her as a fantasy book creation as easily as some other female villains. Not because she's a woman, or because of her gender presentation, but because she represents a sort of evil that's far, far too close to home too-bassoon Voldemort is stereotypically scary, but he's a very unreal kind of scary. Umbridge is different. Everyone's had an umbridge the-cimmerians yes because lawful evil wraps itself in righteousness and oppresses you through approved systems and hierarchies that nobody is supposed to question Source.firesnaps 102,194 notes The scariest fictional villains are the ones most likely to be real