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what-even-is-thiss: bobcatdump: jaskiegg: mellomaia: aphony-cree: beyoncescock: gahdamnpunk: Honestly!!! This is just psychological trauma in the making THANK YOU Iโ€™ve asked parents about this and they always say they are teaching the child responsibility and โ€œrespect for other peopleโ€™s things.โ€ If I point out that the child accidentally broke their own toy they always sayย โ€œI bought them that toyโ€ orย โ€œmy sister gave that to them.โ€ The problem is that parents view all possessions as not really belonging to the child. A part of them always seems to think that the adult who provided the money is the real owner If a parent breaks a dish they see it as breaking something that already belonged to them, but if a child breaks it they see it as the child breaking something that belonged to the parents People raising children need to realize that household possessions belong to the entire household. If everyone has to use that plate then it belongs to everyone and anyone can have a forgivable accident with it. Itโ€™s okay to deem certain possessions as just yours and ask everyone in the house to respect that, but extend the same respect to your childโ€™s belongings Big mood. I know most of these are talking about little little kids, but hereโ€™s a tale from middle school. I had forgotten to charge my phone one night, and this was back when cell phones used to beep loudly when they were low on battery. I kept hearing the noise throughout the afternoon and not recognizing what it was because Iโ€™d never heard it before. When I finally did realize what it was, I was in science class and my fellow classmates were making presentations. I reached into my bag to try to turn off the phone, and then the low-battery sound went off, loud enough for the teacher to hear it. She confiscated my phone in front of everyone, and I didnโ€™t get it back until after the weekend because it was a Friday. I was really embarrassed, especially to tell my parents. When I got my phone back that Monday, my teacher said it was important for me to learn this lesson now since in college they wouldnโ€™t tolerate phones going off. Fast forward to when I was in college, any time someoneโ€™s phone went off, either the professor would tell them to turn it off, or they would say, โ€œOh, my bad,โ€ and turn it off themselves, and everyone would move on. I even had a professor who danced around while someoneโ€™s phone went off, and it was a welcome moment of levity during the lecture. I say all this to say, one of the worst aspects of being a child/teen was adults assuming my intentions were malicious. God Iโ€™ve been reading these posts for a while and each time I am struck with the realization that certainly not all parents were supposed to be a parent โ€œI say all this to say, one of the worst aspects of being a child/teen was adults assuming my intentions were malicious.โ€YES this The problem is, even if families are forgiving the culture around children still effects the child. I use myself as proof of that. A few times between the ages of 4 and 18 I broke things. I broke my grandmaโ€™s favorite Christmas ornament. Her first question was: โ€œAre you hurt?โ€ and when I apologized profusely she said โ€œIโ€™m just glad you werenโ€™t hurt.โ€ I broke a few plates. I broke a couple glasses. Every time my dadโ€™s first response was โ€œDid you get cut?โ€ the second step was cleaning up the broken bits, and the third was a discussion of what led to me breaking it and how I could avoid doing that in the future. Same with spills. Same with stains. My biggest โ€œpunishmentโ€ from my immediate family was being taught how to clean up the mess I made and being shown in detail how to avoid the same mistake in the future if it was avoidable. There were consequences for my actions, but they were the direct result of those actions and nothing much beyond that. My family tried so hard to teach me how to deal with accidents in a healthy way. They were patient. They treated every slip-up as a learning opportunity. They showed me a lot of love. The other adults still got to me. Teachers still punished and publicly shamed me and other students for our mess-ups. Extended family members outside of my small supportive circle still yelled at me. My friendsโ€™ parents still got mad. To the point where whenever I messed up my first instinct was that my dad or grandparents were going to punish me, or yell at me, or hit me, even though they never did. They just didnโ€™t. They always responded with patience and an attitude of โ€œIโ€™m glad youโ€™re safe and I want to help you learn from this.โ€ And I was still afraid of messing up. Mortified. Expecting the worst every time. Itโ€™s likeโ€ฆ we need to change the culture around this, man. Completely. : what-even-is-thiss: bobcatdump: jaskiegg: mellomaia: aphony-cree: beyoncescock: gahdamnpunk: Honestly!!! This is just psychological trauma in the making THANK YOU Iโ€™ve asked parents about this and they always say they are teaching the child responsibility and โ€œrespect for other peopleโ€™s things.โ€ If I point out that the child accidentally broke their own toy they always sayย โ€œI bought them that toyโ€ orย โ€œmy sister gave that to them.โ€ The problem is that parents view all possessions as not really belonging to the child. A part of them always seems to think that the adult who provided the money is the real owner If a parent breaks a dish they see it as breaking something that already belonged to them, but if a child breaks it they see it as the child breaking something that belonged to the parents People raising children need to realize that household possessions belong to the entire household. If everyone has to use that plate then it belongs to everyone and anyone can have a forgivable accident with it. Itโ€™s okay to deem certain possessions as just yours and ask everyone in the house to respect that, but extend the same respect to your childโ€™s belongings Big mood. I know most of these are talking about little little kids, but hereโ€™s a tale from middle school. I had forgotten to charge my phone one night, and this was back when cell phones used to beep loudly when they were low on battery. I kept hearing the noise throughout the afternoon and not recognizing what it was because Iโ€™d never heard it before. When I finally did realize what it was, I was in science class and my fellow classmates were making presentations. I reached into my bag to try to turn off the phone, and then the low-battery sound went off, loud enough for the teacher to hear it. She confiscated my phone in front of everyone, and I didnโ€™t get it back until after the weekend because it was a Friday. I was really embarrassed, especially to tell my parents. When I got my phone back that Monday, my teacher said it was important for me to learn this lesson now since in college they wouldnโ€™t tolerate phones going off. Fast forward to when I was in college, any time someoneโ€™s phone went off, either the professor would tell them to turn it off, or they would say, โ€œOh, my bad,โ€ and turn it off themselves, and everyone would move on. I even had a professor who danced around while someoneโ€™s phone went off, and it was a welcome moment of levity during the lecture. I say all this to say, one of the worst aspects of being a child/teen was adults assuming my intentions were malicious. God Iโ€™ve been reading these posts for a while and each time I am struck with the realization that certainly not all parents were supposed to be a parent โ€œI say all this to say, one of the worst aspects of being a child/teen was adults assuming my intentions were malicious.โ€YES this The problem is, even if families are forgiving the culture around children still effects the child. I use myself as proof of that. A few times between the ages of 4 and 18 I broke things. I broke my grandmaโ€™s favorite Christmas ornament. Her first question was: โ€œAre you hurt?โ€ and when I apologized profusely she said โ€œIโ€™m just glad you werenโ€™t hurt.โ€ I broke a few plates. I broke a couple glasses. Every time my dadโ€™s first response was โ€œDid you get cut?โ€ the second step was cleaning up the broken bits, and the third was a discussion of what led to me breaking it and how I could avoid doing that in the future. Same with spills. Same with stains. My biggest โ€œpunishmentโ€ from my immediate family was being taught how to clean up the mess I made and being shown in detail how to avoid the same mistake in the future if it was avoidable. There were consequences for my actions, but they were the direct result of those actions and nothing much beyond that. My family tried so hard to teach me how to deal with accidents in a healthy way. They were patient. They treated every slip-up as a learning opportunity. They showed me a lot of love. The other adults still got to me. Teachers still punished and publicly shamed me and other students for our mess-ups. Extended family members outside of my small supportive circle still yelled at me. My friendsโ€™ parents still got mad. To the point where whenever I messed up my first instinct was that my dad or grandparents were going to punish me, or yell at me, or hit me, even though they never did. They just didnโ€™t. They always responded with patience and an attitude of โ€œIโ€™m glad youโ€™re safe and I want to help you learn from this.โ€ And I was still afraid of messing up. Mortified. Expecting the worst every time. Itโ€™s likeโ€ฆ we need to change the culture around this, man. Completely.

what-even-is-thiss: bobcatdump: jaskiegg: mellomaia: aphony-cree: beyoncescock: gahdamnpunk: Honestly!!! This is just psychologica...

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scifiseries: The Virus of Life This ebook is about a group of kids that meet in a small town from Romania called 2 Mai. They just play at the beginning dreaming that in the future they will be doctors or inventors or powerful people. For this dream to be realized they start to read books about religion, history myths, science and of course the occult.By doing so they meet yet more kids who are interested in the occult and they start a group in order to realize their dreams. In all this time life and years pass by in a society who does not care about age or genderโ€ฆ.or simply does not care for the basic individual.Deaths are regarded as accidents and are dismissed, and ignorance is a great tool for a fool. This group of kids decides to make a move and that could be their downfall into darkness and despair. Buy atSmashwords Barnes and NobleKobo : scifiseries: The Virus of Life This ebook is about a group of kids that meet in a small town from Romania called 2 Mai. They just play at the beginning dreaming that in the future they will be doctors or inventors or powerful people. For this dream to be realized they start to read books about religion, history myths, science and of course the occult.By doing so they meet yet more kids who are interested in the occult and they start a group in order to realize their dreams. In all this time life and years pass by in a society who does not care about age or genderโ€ฆ.or simply does not care for the basic individual.Deaths are regarded as accidents and are dismissed, and ignorance is a great tool for a fool. This group of kids decides to make a move and that could be their downfall into darkness and despair. Buy atSmashwords Barnes and NobleKobo

scifiseries: The Virus of Life This ebook is about a group of kids that meet in a small town from Romania called 2 Mai. They just play...

Save
scifiseries: The Virus of Life This ebook is about a group of kids that meet in a small town from Romania called 2 Mai. They just play at the beginning dreaming that in the future they will be doctors or inventors or powerful people. For this dream to be realized they start to read books about religion, history myths, science and of course the occult.By doing so they meet yet more kids who are interested in the occult and they start a group in order to realize their dreams. In all this time life and years pass by in a society who does not care about age or genderโ€ฆ.or simply does not care for the basic individual.Deaths are regarded as accidents and are dismissed, and ignorance is a great tool for a fool. This group of kids decides to make a move and that could be their downfall into darkness and despair. Buy atSmashwords Barnes and NobleKobo : scifiseries: The Virus of Life This ebook is about a group of kids that meet in a small town from Romania called 2 Mai. They just play at the beginning dreaming that in the future they will be doctors or inventors or powerful people. For this dream to be realized they start to read books about religion, history myths, science and of course the occult.By doing so they meet yet more kids who are interested in the occult and they start a group in order to realize their dreams. In all this time life and years pass by in a society who does not care about age or genderโ€ฆ.or simply does not care for the basic individual.Deaths are regarded as accidents and are dismissed, and ignorance is a great tool for a fool. This group of kids decides to make a move and that could be their downfall into darkness and despair. Buy atSmashwords Barnes and NobleKobo

scifiseries: The Virus of Life This ebook is about a group of kids that meet in a small town from Romania called 2 Mai. They just play...

Save