Cyanide And Happieness
Cyanide And Happieness

Cyanide And Happieness

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play-stupid-games

play-stupid-games

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ifs

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probable

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accordingly

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comming

comming

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stupider

stupider

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Cars, Children, and Club: 20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down. 1. 2. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood. 3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that. 4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it "In". 5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds". 6. 7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy". 8. Don't use any punctuation. 9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk. 10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face. 11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go". 12. Sing Along At The Opera. 13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme. 14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day. 15. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice. 16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom. 17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM Scream "I Won! I Won!" 18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!" 19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go." 20. Suck in some helium from a balloon, walk behind someone and say "follow the yellow brick road" laughoutloud-club: Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

laughoutloud-club: Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

Fire, Funny, and Guns: BE POLICE Instruction Manual Stun Activation Button ON/OFF Switch Safety Switch (Not shown Contact Probes Charging Port Not shown Saferty Cap LED Flah light Recharging The rechargeable batteries are already installed. The unit can'tbe opened, as it will void the warranty 2. We recommend charging the stun gun before it is used. Simply plug the charging cord into the bottom of the unit and into a standard outlet. The red light will come on while charging. IMPORTANT: do not charge for more than 8 hours at a time. Overcharging can damage the unit and void lie wamanty. Under normal use the unit will need to be recharged for 8 hours every 60 days. lf the LED light is used frequently or if the lectrical cument becomes noticeably weaker, the unit will need to be recharged Using the Flashlight a situation where you night need to quickly Note: The flashlight will work with the Stun ONIOFF Switchin either the ON or OFF position. If you activate t stun gun (at home during the power outage) we recommend you use to ON position. you don't anticipate needing the stun gun at home during a power outage) we recommend the OFF position t will come on. The unit nd the LED flashlight ddle positi fety switch to th With the ON/OFF Switch in the ON or OFF position, slide th wil not fire with the LED flashlight ON Testing the Stun Gun: We recommend test fring the stun gun and becoming familiar with its operation before you need (WARNING: Do not test fire he stun gun for more than 1 second as this will damage the unit and void to warranty Remove the plastic safety cap from the flashlight. see it to defend yourself. The ONOFF Switch (located on the bottom of to unit must be in the ON position to test fire the unit. hold down the button for more than Move the safety switch in the top position, push the Stun Activation Button to test hre the unit. Do not on to second. You will see and hear a charge fire across the top of the unit between the test probes. lmportant: side the ON/oFF switch bottom of to unit to the OFF position when you have finished test firing Using the Stun Gun In Self Defense Remove the Safety Cap from the Flashlight Safety Switchinthe 2. Switchin ON positon and the p position, touch your assailant's body wit the contact probes 3. and press the Stun Activation Button will have an effect. the unit is test Touching anwhere on to assailants body as you do when touching the assailants not see or hear the electrical fired. You can hold the Stun Activation Button down more than 1 second, as this will not damage the unit, as it will when being test fired touches you while being dono o the charge being transfemed to you. Even the assailant stunned, you will not feel the effect of the charge Effects of the Unit on an Assailant have a repelling effect. 2. Touching an to less tan 1 second will cause minor muscle contractions and state effects to the an assailant for 1 to 2 seconds will cause muscle spasms and a dazed mental disorientation. 3. Touching an assailant for 3 to 5 seconds will cause loss balance a muscle contr mental confusion, and seconds) assailant are temporary, the stun gun can cause no of should not be used f permanent harm. (NOTE: The device WARRANTY abuse, li The warranty does not cover damage resulting from accident, misuse at not in accordance with the induded instructions. The warranty will be provided withthe oss of parts, or recharging the unit in any manner dealer) or if any unauthorized replacement parts have been been opened or tampered with in any way (unless by an authorized used. NOTICE: Purchaser must check and abide by all local Laws governing the possession and use of stun guns. In addition, the stun gun must only used in a lawful manner for self-defense. NOTE: Not to be with disease, or any vital part ot the human body. Not to used on stored or used in environments where it is damp or humid or where there are extreme hot or cold temperatures. Do not use on metal objects onditions of sale: Purchase of this product is an agreement by the purchaserluser to hold all sellers and manufacturers harmless of an iabities obtain Service: Contact the Authorized Dealer from whom you purchased this unit for a Return Merchandise Authorization. The return una tpostage prepaid and Damage or oss occurring during shipment is not covered by this warranty purchase is required. LED Flah Recharging 1. The rechargeable batteries are already installed. T 2. We recommend charging the stun gun before it is The red light will come on while charging. IMPORT void lie warranty. Under normal use the unit wil ne electrical cument becomes noticeably weaker, the Using the Flashlight Note: The flashlight will work with the Stun ON/OFF Switch ir activate to stun gun (at home during the power outage) we re during a power outage) we recommend the OFF position 1. With the ON/OFF Switch in the ON or OFF position will not fire with the LED flashlight ON. Testing the stun Gun: We recommend test firing the stun g (WARNING: Do not test fire he stun un for more than 1 sec 1. Remove the plastic safety cap from the flashlight. 2. The ONOFF Switch (located on the bottom of to u 3. Move the safety switch in the top position, pu th second. You will see and hear a charge fire acros bottom of to unit to the OFF position when you ha Using the Stun Gun In Self Defense 1. Remove the Safety Cap from the Flashlight. 2. With the stun ONIOFF Switch in the ON position a and press the Stun Activation Button. 3. Touching anywhere on to assailant's body will hav 4. When touching the assailants body, you will not s Button down for more than 1 second, as 5. You do not have to be concerned about the effects stunned, you will not feel the effect of the charge Effects of the Unit on an Assailant 1. Touching an assailant to less tan 1 second will cause mit 2. Touching an assailant for 1 to 2 seconds will cause must My dad's error in reading what he is buying online...

My dad's error in reading what he is buying online...

Fall, Life, and Run: April 28, 2017 RIP Perceval the server Perceval passed away peacefully in his sleep last week at the age of 21. Perceval began life as an IBM RISC server running AlX. Early on, it was discovered he had a genetic predis position to compute dates using two digit years. He was able to overcome this in the fall of 1999 by transitioning to Sun hardware. He spent the rest of his life running on various flavors of Sun/Oracle hardware. He lived his final years as a Virtual Machine running on a SPARC-Enterprise-T5120. Perceval chose to run the unidata database. He had other suitors through the years, but stayed true to unidata to the end. Perceval adhered to IEEE standards and was POSIX compliant. Perceval was most proud of his time spent hosting the Personal Lookup Service called PLUS. PLUS allowed students access to their records and registration in the early days of the world wide web. PLUS evolved from a menu based system called CULINE CULINE was based on gopher, a technology that was a predecessor of the World Wide Perceval worked tirelessly behind the scenes loading data from Central Computing into various enterprise systems and campus departmental systems. The Enterprise Directory IDM and the Telecom Management System are a few of these systems Perceval is survived by his peer bercilak and longtime remote host cutransfer. He was tristan, pendragon and roundtable. databases, linux and cloud computing. A private ceremony was held at the OIT Data Center. In accordance with percevals wishes, interment will be performed at the Boulder County center for hard to recycle Perceval always appreciated the support given him by all the developers and sysadms In lieu of flowers please make donations to the Colorado MultValue Users Group. GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN <p>An obituary is issued every time a server dies at this school. [x-post /r/geek] via /r/wholesomememes <a href="http://ift.tt/2qowQwZ">http://ift.tt/2qowQwZ</a></p>

An obituary is issued every time a server dies at this school. [x-post /r/geek] via /r/wholesomememes http://ift.tt/2qowQwZ

Dating, Fashion, and Life: You can't just do whatever you want when in a Relationship. You always have to be mindful of IG: SilentlySpoken whomever you're with. And that's what people don't understand. TRUERWORDSYOUVENEVERHEARD❤ ____________________________________________ NOWADAYS younger generations & some older generations are BLIND & DYSLEXIC I swear! I say that because ANYTHING & EVERYTHING means NOTHING...And not a DAMN THING holds the truest value of SOMETHING....CONFUSING RIGHT?! I'll explain. People will be in a RELATIONSHIP yet still behave in a "Single Person Fashion", Listen to others only to REPLY aka Fight for no real reason (Immature) & be SELFISH when dating but never SELFLESS?! There's no "I" in TEAM for those of you who lack the comprehension of "ONE ACCORD aka MOVING as ONE UNIT-BODY" (aka Being Equally Yolked)... And "WE" isn't backwards for only thinking of "ME" & "keep doing ME" for those of you who can't read & pretend like you can't SEE! CmonSOMEBODY💯 SICKOFHURTPEOPLEHURTINGHURTPEOPLE MAKEHERFEELLIKESHESTHEONLYONE💯 MAKEHIMFEELLIKEHESTHEONLYONE💯 FAITHFILLEDROMANTIC PATIENTLYAWAITTHELOVEYOUDESERVE ____________________________________________ ▪️PLEASE TAG A QUEEN WHO NEEDS THIS REMINDER ____________________________________________ ▪️PLEASE TAG A KING WHO NEEDS THIS REMINDER ____________________________________________ STOPWHATYOUREDOINGRIGHTNOW For QUOTES-MESSAGES about LIFE & LOVE Follow One the REALEST IG PAGE ever to exist: @SILENTLYSPOKENPROJECT ‼️‼️‼️ AMANWHOACTUALLYGETSIT💯 ____________________________________________ (LIKE➕COMMENT➕TAG OTHERS➕SHARE➕FOLLOW⬇️) FollowTheONLYSilentlySpokenProject ➕FOLLOWIG:@SilentlySpokenProject ➕FOLLOWIG:@SilentlySpokenProject ➕FOLLOWIG:@SilentlySpokenProject ____________________________________________ ITSAMANSJOBTOFINDHISQUEEN💯 REMAINSINGLEUNTILUKNOITSREAL LASTOFADYINGBREED YOUDESERVEBETTER EXCUSESNOTSOLDHERESORRY EXCUSESNOTSOLDORACCEPTED ITTAKESCOURAGETOLOVE ITTAKESCOURAGETOLOVEAGAIN SWYD AMANWHOACTUALLYGETSIT SILENTLYSPOKENFROMTHEHEART SILENTLYSPOKENPROJECT SSP THEONLYSSP LOVEQUOTES MRISAYWHATOTHERSWONT ITELLTHETRUTHNOTYOURTRUTH

TRUERWORDSYOUVENEVERHEARD❤ ____________________________________________ NOWADAYS younger generations

Life, Love, and Memes: If someone is really into you, you don't have to keep begging then for a text, call, or to spend time. They'll do it if you are a priority AWOMANSWORTH❤ ____________________________________________ How will you know when they're the ONE?! When you don't have to ask anyone else because for once your HEART & MIND will be on ONE ACCORD & will identify they're the ONE you waited for all along! GODUSESALLTHINGSFORTHEGREATERGOOD RAISEYOURSTANDARDS CHANGETHETHINGSYOUCANCHANGE YouGottaSpeakThingsIntoExistence PATIENTLYAWAITTHELOVEYOUDESERVE ____________________________________________ ▪️PLEASE TAG A QUEEN WHO NEEDS THIS REMINDER ____________________________________________ STOPWHATYOUREDOINGRIGHTNOW For QUOTES-MESSAGES about LIFE & LOVE Follow the REALEST IG PAGE ever @SILENTLYSPOKENPROJECT ‼️‼️‼️ AMANWHOACTUALLYGETSIT💯 ____________________________________________ (LIKE➕COMMENT➕TAG OTHERS➕SHARE➕FOLLOW⬇️) FollowTheONLYSilentlySpokenProject ➕FOLLOWIG:@SilentlySpokenProject ➕FOLLOWIG:@SilentlySpokenProject ➕FOLLOWIG:@SilentlySpokenProject ____________________________________________ ITSAMANSJOBTOFINDHISQUEEN💯 REMAINSINGLEUNTILUKNOITSREAL HAPPILYAFTERONEDAY FORHER LASTOFADYINGBREED YOUDESERVEBETTER EXCUSESNOTSOLDHERESORRY EXCUSESNOTSOLDORACCEPTED ITTAKESCOURAGETOLOVE ITTAKESCOURAGETOLOVEAGAIN SWYD AMANWHOACTUALLYGETSIT SILENTLYSPOKENFROMTHEHEART SILENTLYSPOKENPROJECT SSP THEONLYSSP LOVEQUOTES MRISAYWHATOTHERSWONT ITELLTHETRUTHNOTYOURTRUTH

AWOMANSWORTH❤ ____________________________________________ How will you know when they're the ONE?! When you don't have to ask anyone else b...

Baller Alert, Bill Clinton, and Memes: President Obama Named 2017 "Profile in Courage" Honoree @baller alert President Obama Named 2017 “Profile in Courage” Honoree - blogged by: @msjennyb ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ As we continue to sulk over the ending of a historical presidential era, former president, BarackObama, is casually enjoying life, all smiles, without a care (or tie) in the world. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ As if his historic run as the first African American Head of State wasn’t enough, Obama’s success and recognition post-presidency is rapidly increasing. Earlier this week it was reported that the former first couple recently secured a $60 million book deal, topping the record amount previously held by Bill Clinton. Now, according to CNN, Barack Obama has been named the 2017 Profile in Courage Award honoree by the John F. Kennedy Library Foundation, an honor previously awarded to former Presidents Gerald Ford and George H.W. Bush. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The “Profile in Courage” award is presented to government officials in any area, “whose actions demonstrate the qualities of politically courage leadership in the spirit of ‘Profile in Courage,’ President Kennedy’s 1957 Pulitzer Prize-winning book,” the award website states. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The foundation announced the honor on Thursday, saying it will recognize the former president for “expanding health security for millions of Americans, restoring diplomatic relations with Cuba and leading a landmark international accord to combat climate change.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The award ceremony will take place in May. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “Our country owes a debt of gratitude to President Obama, not just for the many important policy achievements made during his tenure but also for the example of leadership he provided all of us, which we may draw upon in the years to come,” JFK’s grandson said in a statement.

President Obama Named 2017 “Profile in Courage” Honoree - blogged by: @msjennyb ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ As we continue to sulk over the ending o...

Crime, Drone, and Memes: When people bring up Obama's drone strikes but don't know the Pentagon authorizes them in the first place. Yet turn a blind eye that Trump continued the policy ALL LIVE MATT! The eight-year-old daughter of a radical preacher was among a large group of civilians reportedly killed during a US dawn raid in Yemen, the first military operation overseen by Donald Trump. Around 30 people, including 10 women and children, are thought to have been killed by American military personnel in the rural Yakla district of al-Bayda in the south of the country, according to medical staff.Eight-year-old American girl 'killed in Yemen raid <approved >by Trump' Anwar al-Awlaki’s daughter, Nawar, may have been fatally shot in intelligence operation on al-Qaida that left at least 14 people, including a US commando, dead.President Donald Trump <personally >approved a US commando raid in Yemen that left one elite serviceman dead and may have killed an eight-year-old American girl, the US military has told the Guardian.An eight-year-old girl, Nawar al-Awlaki, was killed in the raid, according to her family. Nawar, also known as Nora, is the daughter of the al-Qaida propagandist and American citizen Anwar al-Awlaki, who was killed in a September 2011 US drone strike in Yemen. Awlaki’s 16-year-old son Abdulrahman was killed in a second drone strike soon afterwards. On the campaign trail, Trump endorsed killing relatives of terrorist suspects, which is a <war crime>. “The other thing with the terrorists is you have to take out their families, when you get these terrorists, you have to take out their families,” he told Fox News in December 2015. 17thsoulja BlackIG17th alllivesmatter
Doe, Fire, and Guns: Source: oc Weekly @undocumedia Christian Dorscht, the 13-year-old dragged by an off-duty Los Angeles policeman in Anaheim Teen Anaheim before he pulled a gun and fired a shot near him, has just been released from Involved in Fracas Orange County Juvenile Hall, the Weekly has learned. Anaheim police arrested him with Gun Firing yesterday in the after-school altercation that's gone viral for alleged battery and LAPD Cop criminal threats. Johnny Dorscht, Christian's father, tells the Weekly his son has never been Released: Father in trouble with the law before. (In the video, Christian can be heard claiming that his Speaks Out father is a cop, according to Dorscht, Christian's stepfather is a police officer) *FULL VIDEO SEE LINK IN BIO @undocumedia Anaheim: Off-duty LAPD officer forces 13 year old Mexican-American boy onto his property, shoots at him *FULL VIDEO SEE LINK IN BIO @undocumedia - - - - - - - - - - - - - Christian Dorscht, the 13-year-old dragged by an off-duty Los Angeles policeman in Anaheim before he pulled a gun and fired a shot near him, has just been released from Orange County Juvenile Hall, the Weekly has learned. Anaheim police arrested him yesterday in the after-school altercation that's gone viral for alleged battery and criminal threats. Johnny Dorscht, Christian's father, tells the Weekly his son has never been in trouble with the law before. (In the video, Christian can be heard claiming that his father is a cop; according to Dorscht, Christian's stepfather is a police officer). "What I've been told is that my son told the off-duty cop, 'I'm going to sue you for hitting me. I'm a minor,'" says Dorscht, saying his son was attacked first. In the now-infamous video, the sunglasses-wearing officer continually accuses Christian of saying he was going to "shoot him," which became grounds for the criminal threats arrest in the cop's mind. Dorscht believes that all his kid did was stand up for a girl after the off-duty cop allegedly called the teen a "cunt" for stepping on his grass. Jimenez took various photographs of her son after he'd been taken into custody. They show wrist bruises where he was cuffed and other markings along his neck from the LAPD cop's grabbing-and-dragging routine. "I'm pretty pissed off about what happened," Dorscht says. "You could talk to anybody, my son has very good manners. He does good in school and isn't disrespectful or anything like that." The case will be presented to the Orange County District Attorney's office, who'll decide on charges, if any. Spokesperson Susan Kang Schroeder hasn't responded to the Weekly's request for comment on the matter, but we'll publish it when we receive it. "We're going to find legal representation and be suing," Dorscht says. "This is B.S. Even the cops, when they got there, they had all the kids down. They didn't even go after the guy."

*FULL VIDEO SEE LINK IN BIO @undocumedia Anaheim: Off-duty LAPD officer forces 13 year old Mexican-American boy onto his property, shoots at...

Memes, Mondays, and Obama: VETERANS COME FIRST LIKE IF YOU SEEATRAITOR A group of lawmakers is planning to request a congressional investigation of a $418 million U.S. weapons sale to Kenya approved by the Obama administration on its last day in office. A handful of lawmakers, led by Rep. Ted Budd (R-NC), are questioning why the contract to produce the planes was awarded to major defense firm L3 Technologies — which has never produced such a plane — while a smaller, disabled veteran-owned company in North Carolina that already make those planes at a lower cost was not considered. The Mooresville, N.C. company, IOMAX USA Inc., costed out 14 planes at $237 million dollars, according to a Budd aide. “It looks like politics,” Budd said in a phone interview with Breitbart News on Monday. “Why are they sending it to someone that’s produced zero, for twice the price? This is inappropriate.” That is more proof Obama's a traitor and helping his Homeland at taxpayers' expense! I hope congressmen, who have started a special investigation will get to the true extent of corruption in the Obama administration. There is clearly a corruption scheme here. Obama administration bypassing the well-known veteran-owned company gave the right to the production of these planes to another company. Kenya is the birthplace of Obama, so it is the most suitable place for fraudulent transactions. I hope that the investigation will be able to get to the true role of the former president in organization of this dubious contract. veteranscomefirst veterans_us Veterans Usveterans veteransUSA SupportVeterans Politics USA America Patriots Gratitude HonorVets thankvets supportourtroops semperfi USMC USCG USAF Navy Army military godblessourmilitary soldier holdthegovernmentaccountable RememberEveryoneDeployed Usflag StarsandStripes

A group of lawmakers is planning to request a congressional investigation of a $418 million U.S. weapons sale to Kenya approved by the Obama...