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        missoyashirou:

mithrils-hanger:

lizawithazed:

dvandom:

filibusterfrog:
halflings love their new giant children
“So, Mister…GRAAAAGH Underhill-by-Sackville, is it?”“Indeed.”“You’re an Orc, but you don’t mention any clan….”“Oh, I’m culturally Hobbitish, I was adopted at a very young age.  And I’m very keen on this position you have open at your trading house.”“The guard position?”“Heavens, no.  I barely know which end of a sword goes into the miscreant.  I am a certified accountant, and eager to make my mark in respectable society.”


I once played a kobold sorcerer-rogue with this exact backstory

even better, Tolkein Orcs seem to grow in size based on how good their diet is. thus Misty Mountain and Moria ‘goblins’ are relatively small (caves rarely provide much in the way of nourishment), Mordor orcs are a bit on the larger size, but still close to dwarf size (given that two hobbits easily blend in), while the extremely well fed Orthanc Uruk-Hai are the size of large men.Hobbits eat six meals a day, when they can get them. and love to snack in between. even the poorest are able to sustain this diet, and the rich just eat far more elaborate meals. 
those adopted kids are going to grow up to be huge.

A 10 foot tall green dude by the name of Arthur Brambly-Took came to my luncheon and now I’m going to have to marry him
: The Halfling's declining birthrates, in tandem with a deeply ingrained
 culture of hospitality has led to a
 recent uptick in cross-species
 adoption.
 Frequently orphaned, due
 to the naturally short lifespan:s
 of orcs, orcish children with
 halfling parents have
 become somewhat more
 common in halfling
 settlements.
 po
 Dad (60)
 (Adopted) Daughter (16)

 / Love
 MY
 While it is generally considered unacceptable for
 little folk to go adventuring, it is perfectly repectable
 for any upstanding halfling to travel distantly in search
 of an appropriate child
 (In light of recent events, laws have been passed
 that only allow for one such venture to prevent the
 sizes of families getting out of hand)
missoyashirou:

mithrils-hanger:

lizawithazed:

dvandom:

filibusterfrog:
halflings love their new giant children
“So, Mister…GRAAAAGH Underhill-by-Sackville, is it?”“Indeed.”“You’re an Orc, but you don’t mention any clan….”“Oh, I’m culturally Hobbitish, I was adopted at a very young age.  And I’m very keen on this position you have open at your trading house.”“The guard position?”“Heavens, no.  I barely know which end of a sword goes into the miscreant.  I am a certified accountant, and eager to make my mark in respectable society.”


I once played a kobold sorcerer-rogue with this exact backstory

even better, Tolkein Orcs seem to grow in size based on how good their diet is. thus Misty Mountain and Moria ‘goblins’ are relatively small (caves rarely provide much in the way of nourishment), Mordor orcs are a bit on the larger size, but still close to dwarf size (given that two hobbits easily blend in), while the extremely well fed Orthanc Uruk-Hai are the size of large men.Hobbits eat six meals a day, when they can get them. and love to snack in between. even the poorest are able to sustain this diet, and the rich just eat far more elaborate meals. 
those adopted kids are going to grow up to be huge.

A 10 foot tall green dude by the name of Arthur Brambly-Took came to my luncheon and now I’m going to have to marry him

        

            
            

                
                
                    missoyashirou:

mithrils-hanger:

lizawithazed:

dvandom:

filibusterfrog:
halflings love their new giant children
“So, Mister…GRAAAAGH Underhill-by-Sackville, is it?”“Indeed.”“You’re an Orc, but you don’t mention any clan….”“Oh, I’m culturally Hobbitish, I was adopted at a very young age.  And I’m very keen on this position you have open at your trading house.”“The guard position?”“Heavens, no.  I barely know which end of a sword goes into the miscreant.  I am a certified accountant, and eager to make my mark in respectable society.”


I once played a kobold sorcerer-rogue with this exact backstory

even better, Tolkein Orcs seem to grow in size based on how good their diet is. thus Misty Mountain and Moria ‘goblins’ are relatively small (caves rarely provide much in the way of nourishment), Mordor orcs are a bit on the larger size, but still close to dwarf size (given that two hobbits easily blend in), while the extremely well fed Orthanc Uruk-Hai are the size of large men.Hobbits eat six meals a day, when they can get them. and love to snack in between. even the poorest are able to sustain this diet, and the rich just eat far more elaborate meals. 
those adopted kids are going to grow up to be huge.

A 10 foot tall green dude by the name of Arthur Brambly-Took came to my luncheon and now I’m going to have to marry him
: The Halfling's declining birthrates, in tandem with a deeply ingrained
 culture of hospitality has led to a
 recent uptick in cross-species
 adoption.
 Frequently orphaned, due
 to the naturally short lifespan:s
 of orcs, orcish children with
 halfling parents have
 become somewhat more
 common in halfling
 settlements.
 po
 Dad (60)
 (Adopted) Daughter (16)

 / Love
 MY
 While it is generally considered unacceptable for
 little folk to go adventuring, it is perfectly repectable
 for any upstanding halfling to travel distantly in search
 of an appropriate child
 (In light of recent events, laws have been passed
 that only allow for one such venture to prevent the
 sizes of families getting out of hand)
missoyashirou:

mithrils-hanger:

lizawithazed:

dvandom:

filibusterfrog:
halflings love their new giant children
“So, Mister…GRAAAAGH Underhill-by-Sackville, is it?”“Indeed.”“You’re an Orc, but you don’t mention any clan….”“Oh, I’m culturally Hobbitish, I was adopted at a very young age.  And I’m very keen on this position you have open at your trading house.”“The guard position?”“Heavens, no.  I barely know which end of a sword goes into the miscreant.  I am a certified accountant, and eager to make my mark in respectable society.”


I once played a kobold sorcerer-rogue with this exact backstory

even better, Tolkein Orcs seem to grow in size based on how good their diet is. thus Misty Mountain and Moria ‘goblins’ are relatively small (caves rarely provide much in the way of nourishment), Mordor orcs are a bit on the larger size, but still close to dwarf size (given that two hobbits easily blend in), while the extremely well fed Orthanc Uruk-Hai are the size of large men.Hobbits eat six meals a day, when they can get them. and love to snack in between. even the poorest are able to sustain this diet, and the rich just eat far more elaborate meals. 
those adopted kids are going to grow up to be huge.

A 10 foot tall green dude by the name of Arthur Brambly-Took came to my luncheon and now I’m going to have to marry him

                    
                
            

            
                
                
missoyashirou:

mithrils-hanger:

lizawithazed:

dvandom:

filibusterfrog:
halflings love their new giant children
“So, Mister…GRAAAAGH U...

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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        I thought it was satire. It wasnt.: It's just a tattoo," he says, when the silence goes on so long that we have nearly
 fallen over the edge of it into a pit of black nothingness. "It's not as if I came home
 and said I'd got someone pregnant.
 It seems to me, unhinged by shock, that this might have been the better option.
 His father says, "Where?"
 "On my arm," he says, and touches his bicep through his shirt.
 His lovely shoulder.
 For three days, I can't speak to my son. I can hardly bear to look at him. I decide
 this is rational. The last thing we need, I think, is an explosion of white-hot words
 that
 In any case, I'm not even sure what it is I want to say. In my mind's eye I stand
 there, a bitter old woman with pursed lips wringing my black-gloved hands. He's
 done the one thing that I've said for years, please d
 upset me if you did this. And now it's happened. So there's nothing left to say
 everyone carries around for the rest of their lives, e
 ngraved on their hearts.
 on't do this. It would really
 So I cry instead. I have a lump in my throat that stops me from eating. I feel as if
 someone has died. I keep thinking of his skin, his precious skin, inked like a pig
 carcasS
 My husband asks, "Have you seen it yet?"
 I shake my head. Like a child, I am hoping that if I keep my eyes tightly shut the
 whole thing will disappear
 It's his body," he says gently. "His choice.
 But what if he wants to be a lawyer?
 A lawyer?
 "Or an accountant."
 He'll be wearing a suit. No one will ever know. And he doesn't want to be a
 I know. I know
 tifalockharts
 this article about some woman's 21 y/o son coming home from school w/ a
 tattoo is THE funniest thing i have seen today
 tifalockharts
 On day three, still in a fog of misery, I say to him, "Shall we talk?"
 We sit down with cups of coffee. I open my mouth to speak and end up crying
 instead. I say, "You couldn't have done anything to hurt me more."
 job I don't even want. I say, "But you're not. You're different. I will never look at
 you in the same way again. It's a visceral feeling. Maybe because I'm your mother
 All those years of looking after your body-taking you to the dentist and making
 you drink milk and worrying about green leafy vegetables and sunscreen and
 cancer from mobile phones. And then you let some stranger inject ink under your
 skin. To me, it seems like self-mutilation. If you'd lost your arm in a car accident, I
 would have understood. I would have done everything to make you feel better
 But this -this is desecration. And I hate it."
 'M SHRIEKING
 regretityet
 You guys.
 gutmeats
 The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;
 pack up the moon and dismantle the sun.
 What the fuck
 mustlearntoadult
 SOMEONE LINK THE ARTICLE
 wepon
 a classi
 doctorangelpenguin
 As I was reading this I kept waiting for the tattoo to be revealed as like a nazi
 symbol or some racist shit like for the kkk of something but nope..... She was
 just THAT hurt by ink
 lilaccoloursplash
 You left out the BEST part-stand, a lone tyrannosaurus, bellowing at a world i
 don't understand."
 spontaneoustornadoes
 This woman's writing skills holy fuck
 Source: elsas #give them to me #that stars moon sun quote? raw as F U C K
 49,991 notes
I thought it was satire. It wasnt.
        

            
            

                
                
                    I thought it was satire. It wasnt.: It's just a tattoo," he says, when the silence goes on so long that we have nearly
 fallen over the edge of it into a pit of black nothingness. "It's not as if I came home
 and said I'd got someone pregnant.
 It seems to me, unhinged by shock, that this might have been the better option.
 His father says, "Where?"
 "On my arm," he says, and touches his bicep through his shirt.
 His lovely shoulder.
 For three days, I can't speak to my son. I can hardly bear to look at him. I decide
 this is rational. The last thing we need, I think, is an explosion of white-hot words
 that
 In any case, I'm not even sure what it is I want to say. In my mind's eye I stand
 there, a bitter old woman with pursed lips wringing my black-gloved hands. He's
 done the one thing that I've said for years, please d
 upset me if you did this. And now it's happened. So there's nothing left to say
 everyone carries around for the rest of their lives, e
 ngraved on their hearts.
 on't do this. It would really
 So I cry instead. I have a lump in my throat that stops me from eating. I feel as if
 someone has died. I keep thinking of his skin, his precious skin, inked like a pig
 carcasS
 My husband asks, "Have you seen it yet?"
 I shake my head. Like a child, I am hoping that if I keep my eyes tightly shut the
 whole thing will disappear
 It's his body," he says gently. "His choice.
 But what if he wants to be a lawyer?
 A lawyer?
 "Or an accountant."
 He'll be wearing a suit. No one will ever know. And he doesn't want to be a
 I know. I know
 tifalockharts
 this article about some woman's 21 y/o son coming home from school w/ a
 tattoo is THE funniest thing i have seen today
 tifalockharts
 On day three, still in a fog of misery, I say to him, "Shall we talk?"
 We sit down with cups of coffee. I open my mouth to speak and end up crying
 instead. I say, "You couldn't have done anything to hurt me more."
 job I don't even want. I say, "But you're not. You're different. I will never look at
 you in the same way again. It's a visceral feeling. Maybe because I'm your mother
 All those years of looking after your body-taking you to the dentist and making
 you drink milk and worrying about green leafy vegetables and sunscreen and
 cancer from mobile phones. And then you let some stranger inject ink under your
 skin. To me, it seems like self-mutilation. If you'd lost your arm in a car accident, I
 would have understood. I would have done everything to make you feel better
 But this -this is desecration. And I hate it."
 'M SHRIEKING
 regretityet
 You guys.
 gutmeats
 The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;
 pack up the moon and dismantle the sun.
 What the fuck
 mustlearntoadult
 SOMEONE LINK THE ARTICLE
 wepon
 a classi
 doctorangelpenguin
 As I was reading this I kept waiting for the tattoo to be revealed as like a nazi
 symbol or some racist shit like for the kkk of something but nope..... She was
 just THAT hurt by ink
 lilaccoloursplash
 You left out the BEST part-stand, a lone tyrannosaurus, bellowing at a world i
 don't understand."
 spontaneoustornadoes
 This woman's writing skills holy fuck
 Source: elsas #give them to me #that stars moon sun quote? raw as F U C K
 49,991 notes
I thought it was satire. It wasnt.
                    
                
            

            
            
        

    

    

        
Save

    



        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            









    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        Following up with my (tipsy) stories from Saturday night… IF you don’t know what you are doing with your life it’s time to LEARN a new skill and succeed!👇 - Today’s workplace is not like that of our mothers and fathers. Our parents would pick a single career, like an accountant, doctor, lawyer, or teacher, and continue with that role and position for the rest of their life. That sh*t is not like that anymore. Times have changed. - However, that does not mean the jobs have disappeared, they have simply shifted to other sectors. The truth is there are millions of job vacancies that are available right now if you have the right skill sets. And with advances in modern technology, these skills are all accessible through online courses from the confines of your own home. - My number one recommendation? 👉Digital Marketing. Just about every major business area has undergone massive changes in the last ten years and marketing is no different. If you didn’t know, online marketing is the future. 🔥 More than ever, businesses need people who understand the landscape of online marketing, which covers Search Engine Optimization (SEO), content marketing, and social media. Didn’t understand those terms? Ok, I will break it down but make sure YOU research on your own. Quick: SEO helps businesses get found online; content marketing is all about creating valuable content that people want to share; and social media is a platform to share valuable content and engage with consumers. (The gram for example) - Now… just in case you are interested on a very lucrative online business 👀 you can click the link in my bio and thank me later 😉 👉 @millionaire_mentor - life skills millionairementor: MILIONAIRE MENTOR
 GET THAT
 PAPER!
Following up with my (tipsy) stories from Saturday night… IF you don’t know what you are doing with your life it’s time to LEARN a new skill and succeed!👇 - Today’s workplace is not like that of our mothers and fathers. Our parents would pick a single career, like an accountant, doctor, lawyer, or teacher, and continue with that role and position for the rest of their life. That sh*t is not like that anymore. Times have changed. - However, that does not mean the jobs have disappeared, they have simply shifted to other sectors. The truth is there are millions of job vacancies that are available right now if you have the right skill sets. And with advances in modern technology, these skills are all accessible through online courses from the confines of your own home. - My number one recommendation? 👉Digital Marketing. Just about every major business area has undergone massive changes in the last ten years and marketing is no different. If you didn’t know, online marketing is the future. 🔥 More than ever, businesses need people who understand the landscape of online marketing, which covers Search Engine Optimization (SEO), content marketing, and social media. Didn’t understand those terms? Ok, I will break it down but make sure YOU research on your own. Quick: SEO helps businesses get found online; content marketing is all about creating valuable content that people want to share; and social media is a platform to share valuable content and engage with consumers. (The gram for example) - Now… just in case you are interested on a very lucrative online business 👀 you can click the link in my bio and thank me later 😉 👉 @millionaire_mentor - life skills millionairementor
        

            
            

                
                
                    Following up with my (tipsy) stories from Saturday night… IF you don’t know what you are doing with your life it’s time to LEARN a new skill and succeed!👇 - Today’s workplace is not like that of our mothers and fathers. Our parents would pick a single career, like an accountant, doctor, lawyer, or teacher, and continue with that role and position for the rest of their life. That sh*t is not like that anymore. Times have changed. - However, that does not mean the jobs have disappeared, they have simply shifted to other sectors. The truth is there are millions of job vacancies that are available right now if you have the right skill sets. And with advances in modern technology, these skills are all accessible through online courses from the confines of your own home. - My number one recommendation? 👉Digital Marketing. Just about every major business area has undergone massive changes in the last ten years and marketing is no different. If you didn’t know, online marketing is the future. 🔥 More than ever, businesses need people who understand the landscape of online marketing, which covers Search Engine Optimization (SEO), content marketing, and social media. Didn’t understand those terms? Ok, I will break it down but make sure YOU research on your own. Quick: SEO helps businesses get found online; content marketing is all about creating valuable content that people want to share; and social media is a platform to share valuable content and engage with consumers. (The gram for example) - Now… just in case you are interested on a very lucrative online business 👀 you can click the link in my bio and thank me later 😉 👉 @millionaire_mentor - life skills millionairementor: MILIONAIRE MENTOR
 GET THAT
 PAPER!
Following up with my (tipsy) stories from Saturday night… IF you don’t know what you are doing with your life it’s time to LEARN a new skill and succeed!👇 - Today’s workplace is not like that of our mothers and fathers. Our parents would pick a single career, like an accountant, doctor, lawyer, or teacher, and continue with that role and position for the rest of their life. That sh*t is not like that anymore. Times have changed. - However, that does not mean the jobs have disappeared, they have simply shifted to other sectors. The truth is there are millions of job vacancies that are available right now if you have the right skill sets. And with advances in modern technology, these skills are all accessible through online courses from the confines of your own home. - My number one recommendation? 👉Digital Marketing. Just about every major business area has undergone massive changes in the last ten years and marketing is no different. If you didn’t know, online marketing is the future. 🔥 More than ever, businesses need people who understand the landscape of online marketing, which covers Search Engine Optimization (SEO), content marketing, and social media. Didn’t understand those terms? Ok, I will break it down but make sure YOU research on your own. Quick: SEO helps businesses get found online; content marketing is all about creating valuable content that people want to share; and social media is a platform to share valuable content and engage with consumers. (The gram for example) - Now… just in case you are interested on a very lucrative online business 👀 you can click the link in my bio and thank me later 😉 👉 @millionaire_mentor - life skills millionairementor
                    
                
            

            
            
        

    

    

        
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