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Family, God, and Life: God created the dog and said: Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years." The dog said: That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?' So God agreed Then God created the monkey and said: Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this I'll give you a twenty-year life span.' The monkey said: 'Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?" And God agreed. Then God created the cow and said: You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years. The cow said: That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years.. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty? And God agreed again. Thereafter God created humans and said: Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'II give you twenty years." But the human said: Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?' Okay, said God, 'You asked for it." So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren.. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone. Life has now been explained to you. epicjohndoe: There, Life Has Now Been Explained To You

epicjohndoe: There, Life Has Now Been Explained To You

Family, God, and Life: God created the dog and said: Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years." The dog said: That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?' So God agreed Then God created the monkey and said: Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this I'll give you a twenty-year life span.' The monkey said: 'Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?" And God agreed. Then God created the cow and said: You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years. The cow said: That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years.. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty? And God agreed again. Thereafter God created humans and said: Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'II give you twenty years." But the human said: Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?' Okay, said God, 'You asked for it." So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren.. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone. Life has now been explained to you. epicjohndoe: There, Life Has Now Been Explained To You

epicjohndoe: There, Life Has Now Been Explained To You

College, Fucking, and Lawyer: TRUM 159650291823782704528885 2088726311223753541_n.jpg 130 KB JPG Story time folks >Be me >Trump supporter >Trump sign outside to trigger mostly millennial college near by >Constantly getting run over and pulled out >Think of idea (pic related) >Plant nails and wait sOne day a woman comes to my door >Fat, purple hair, 23 at most, red at the face and starts screaming at me about how it's my fault her tires are flat OhLordMySides.exe >She says if I don't reimburse her for her tire she'll get the police involved Sudden ldea Tell her to leave her information so I can send her the check since I would need to go to the bank Actually does it Call my lawyer to set up the lawsuit >Get my outside cameras to see her running over my sign >Give her name address and car tags to confirm it was her car >Take her to court, open and shut case Pay for damages >Throw in some bullshit about emotional damage "I don't feel like me or my property is safe just because of my political views" >Actually fucking works >She loses her fucking shit at this point >Starts screaming about how I agreed to pay and how this should be illegal NoProof.jpeg Says she can't pay for basic living expenses or college if she has to pay this >Based Judge says "You should of thought about that before tearing down someone's property, you have 30 days to pay She gets her tires destroyed, humiliated in court, can't pay for living expenses, probably got kicked out of college and had to pay me 3k in emotional damages So, guys, what parts of my PC should I upgrade? Pic related siryouarebeingmocked: krungle: inked-up-nomad: miggybeardo: rightsmarts: Read this entire thing, pedes. Hahahahahahahahahaha! Fucking Savage Probably didn’t happen, but a good story. Yeah it sounds a lot like a #ThatHappened story tbh

siryouarebeingmocked: krungle: inked-up-nomad: miggybeardo: rightsmarts: Read this entire thing, pedes. Hahahahahahahahahaha! Fuckin...

America, Community, and Fucking: Mr. Terry Crews <p><a href="http://dicktator-cain.tumblr.com/post/175762794781/kaldicuct-dxindustriesinc-grannythots" class="tumblr_blog">dicktator-cain</a>:</p> <blockquote><p><a href="https://kaldicuct.tumblr.com/post/175350124746/dxindustriesinc-grannythots-odinoco" class="tumblr_blog">kaldicuct</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://dxindustriesinc.tumblr.com/post/175332981144/grannythots-odinoco-grannythots" class="tumblr_blog">dxindustriesinc</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://grannythots.tumblr.com/post/175312713521/odinoco-grannythots-dicapito" class="tumblr_blog">grannythots</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://odinoco.tumblr.com/post/175312314965/grannythots-dicapito-weepingbouquettyphoon" class="tumblr_blog">odinoco</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://grannythots.tumblr.com/post/175312022666/dicapito-weepingbouquettyphoon-chauiee" class="tumblr_blog">grannythots</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://dicapito.tumblr.com/post/175289772226/weepingbouquettyphoon-chauiee-feinstein" class="tumblr_blog">dicapito</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://weepingbouquettyphoon.tumblr.com/post/175286998107/chauiee-feinstein-youre-a-big-powerful-man" class="tumblr_blog">weepingbouquettyphoon</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://chauiee.tumblr.com/post/175282077791/feinstein-youre-a-big-powerful-man-why-didnt" class="tumblr_blog">chauiee</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><b>Feinstein</b>: You’re a big, powerful man. Why didn’t you [gestures pushing motion]?</p> <p><b>Crews</b>: Senator, as a black man in America [sigh]…</p> <p><b>Feinstein</b>: Say it as it is. I think it’s important.</p> <p><b>Crews</b>: …you only have a few shots at success. You only have a few chances to make yourself a viable member of the community. I’m from Flint, Michigan. I have seen many many young black men who were provoked into violence, and they were imprisoned, or they were killed, and they’re not here. My wife for years prepared me. She said, “If you ever get goaded, if you ever get prodded, if you ever have anyone try to push you into any kind of situation, don’t do it. Don’t be violent.” And she trained me. I’ll be honest with you it was the strength of my wife who trained me and told me, “If this situation happens, let’s leave.” And the training worked because I did not go into my first reaction, I grabbed her hand, we left, but the next day I went right to the agency. I have texts, I have phone conversations, and I said, “This is unacceptable!” And I told them how -you know- I almost got violent, but I didn’t. And I said, “What are you going to do about this predator that you have roaming your hallways?” And -you know- I was told, “We are going to do everything in our power. We are going to handle this Terry. You’re right. It is unacceptable.” And then they disappeared. Nothing happened.</p> </blockquote> <p>Look at the faces of the black men behind him it says it all.</p> </blockquote> <p>This is real fucking infuriating. This shit isn’t funny. Fuck them and anyone who makes fun of Terry Crews speaking out and taking a stand.</p> </blockquote> <p> for those who don’t know the context, this is Terry Crews testifying about being sexually assaulted by Adam Venit during a Senate hearing about a proposed bill called the Sexual Assault Survivors Bill of Rights. While I don’t like that Senator Feinstein said what she said, I think it opened the door for a great statement from Terry about WHY he didn’t fight back - since so many people respond to male victims with “oh well you’re bigger than your rapist, why didn’t you push him or her off of you? why didn’t you punch him or her? did you want it or something?” And they don’t listen. Maybe finally people will listen. </p> <p>This shows that anyone can be a victim of sexual assault, even a tall, strong, hulking guy like Terry Crews. And I hope him coming forward with his accusations convinces other victims to realize that it being a victim isn’t something to be ashamed of and to take down their attackers, and push the justice system to FINALLY take male rape and assault seriously. <br/></p> </blockquote> <p>I think she asked him the question precisely for that</p> </blockquote> <p><a href="https://twitter.com/SenFeinstein/status/1011648748219486208">I just looked at her Twitter and she stated (well, implied haha) that yes you’re right, that was indeed why she phrased her question the way she did</a>.  </p> <figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="300" data-orig-width="591"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/13f86be19d2f626f3b8052b4df48d774/tumblr_inline_pazwccAecC1t1rsqs_540.png" data-orig-height="300" data-orig-width="591"/></figure></blockquote> <p>:(</p> </blockquote> <p>Well fuck me.</p> <p>Guys, Hell just froze over. Saddam is chuckin snowballs at Hitler.</p> <p>I just agreed with Feinstein on something.</p> </blockquote> <p>You could even expand this beyond the racial dynamic as well. Any man in that scenario could have easily faced the same threat of jail time or civil suit should they have used physical violence.  <br/><br/>I am glad that Feinstein, in this instance, did something I approve of.</p></blockquote>

<p><a href="http://dicktator-cain.tumblr.com/post/175762794781/kaldicuct-dxindustriesinc-grannythots" class="tumblr_blog">dicktator-cain</a>...