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Butt, Community, and Crush: penfairy I visited the museum and I heard two bros in the dinosaur exhibit having an earnest discussion about the best way to kill a T-Rex with a sword and what kind of armour should be worn into the battle and they spoke with such passion I really wish the scientific community could have heard them. I'd love to know how palaeontologists would weigh in on The Great Debate penfairy For instance, was the bro in the weed shorts right? is it pointless to wear heavy armour when battling a T-Rex? Is it truly better to go into battle naked wielding dual swords? Or was the bro in the backwards cap correct? Should you go for a double-handed sword and iron armour? Will light bouncing off the armour really confuse and blind the beast? Realistically, what protection is armour against a dinosaur? Was Weed Shorts right when he proposed to use his superior agility to slash its tendons and stab the eyes when he brought it down? Or was Backwards Cap right when he said charge and slash open its sot belly?? What is the truth??17? excessively-english-little-b Hello, palaeontologist-in-training herel Thought I'd have a litte think into this because hey, who wants to do coursework on trilobites when you could be considering T, rex instead? Light and maneuverable is probably best when facing a rex. It's big and t's powerful but it's not going to making any quick sharp tums any time soon. According to our current estimates, a T rex would be able to crush a small car with its jaws, so realistically, no amount of armour is gonna protect you if it grabs you If the T. rex manages to grab you you re dead regardless. It could probably eat you within a couple of bites if it was trying Figures 1 & 2: Theoretical T. rex bite-force model fucking up a mini. Thank you, Bill Oddie and BBC's The Truth About Killer Dinosaurs. As far as armour goes, lighter is better, and at the end of the day isn't going to mean shit anyway. T rex can't slash at you with claws, so it's bite or bust, and if it bites YOU'RE bust So, lets say a point to Weed Shorts. Why NOT fight a T rex butt naked with swords T rex had good binocular vision. Dont believe Jurassic Park's lies-T rex was a hunter and could probably see you brilliantly whether you moved or not. " .That said, a T rex's eyesight will work about the same as modem birds of prey. Think hawk, or eagle. I reckon light bouncing off anything would be a fairly minor hindrance, or at least, wouldn't affect it any more than any other hunting bird. So, using light to blind and confuse the rex? May potentially work but might be hard and wouldn't do much for long. Don't rely on this for strategy τ rex actually had gastralia, sometimes called 'belly-ribs. protected and supported the internal organs. There would also be some seriously thick abdominal muscles to get through. Unless you're planning to do some precision stabbing with a very long sword, chances are you're not gonna be killing a rex by slicing open it's stomach. Also, being under its stomach is gonna put you in-reach of the Jaws of Death. These " I'm not sure how easy it would be, or how well it would work, to try and cut a T rex's tendons. Theoretically, sounds like it should work. However you're gonna need a lot of strength to get through them, probably I'd personally cut the throat rather than stab through the eyes once the rex is down, but that's probably personal preference. Once you've felled it, it's dead either wayl A T. rex unable to hunt is a dead T rex . Gastralia Figure 3: The gastralia of a T. rex. Bless u Scott Hartman for your skeletal As far as attack goes, the belly is not as weak a s pot as it seems. So, point to Weed Shorts on his execution plan. Sounds pretty solid. Overall, I'd say that Weed Shorts had the best plan to defeat the mighty Tyrannosaurus rex. If you ever see him again, congratulate him on his solid plan of attack My favorite thing about paleontologists (and any scientist really, but paleontologists in particular) is that you can ask them COMPLETELY BATSHIT INSANE questions and by God, they will give you a completely Serious answer Source penfairy move it #trex #dinosaurs #go for the throat is how wolverine did it #science side of tumblr So you need to sword fight a T. rex
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Arthur, David Bowie, and Puppies: stoneyboboney tumbl Follow urbanoceanbx hapter 3 1 g car and f you took a couple of David Bowies and stuck one of the David Bowies on the top of the other David Bowie, then attached another David Bowie to the end of each of the arms of the upper of the finst two David Bowies and wrapped the whole business up in a dirty robe you would then have something which didn't exactly look like phn Watson, but which those who knew him would find hauntingly terrible Se clledt He was tall and he grandtheftautosanandreas Douglas Adams is the best when it comes to describe characters the-fandoms-are-valentines they need to teach classes on Douglas Adams analogies okay "He leant tensely against the corridor wall and frowned like a man trying to unbend a corkscrew by telekinesis." Stones, then rocks, then boulders which pranced past him like clumsy puppies, only much, much bigger, much, much harder and heavier, and almost infinitely more likely to kill you if they fell on you. "He gazed keenly into the distance and looked as if he would quite like the wind to blow his hair back dramatically at that point, but the wind was busy fooling around with some leaves a little way of "It looked only partly like a spaceship with guidance fins, rocket engines and escape hatches and so on, and a great deal like a small upended Italian bistro." "If it was an emotion, it was a totally emotionless one. It was hatred, implacable hatred. It was cold, not like ice is cold, but like a wall is cold. It was impersonal not as a randomly flung fist in a crowd is impersonal, but like a computer-issued parking summons is impersonal. And it was deadly - again, not like a bullet or a knife is deadly, but like a brick wall across a motorway is deadly nudityandnerdery And, of course The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't. drinkmasturbatecry the one that will always stay with me is "Arthur Dent was grappling with his consciousness the way one grapples with a lost bar of soap in the bath," i feel like that was the first time i really understood what you could do with words marsdaydream I will reblog this every time l see it because these are some of my favorite sentences in the English language ladyscientia Douglas Adams understands me Source:kingwizardandthelizardgizzard #42 #yes this #ahahaha #Douglas Adams 436,335 notes Douglas Adams appreciation post
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David Bowie, Puppies, and Target: ch in fully k tti Chapter 3 1 ng he west ing car and f you took a couple of David Bowies and stuck one of the David Bowies on the top of the other David Bowie, then attached another David Bowie to the end of each of the arms of the upper of the first two David Bowies and wrapped the whole business up in a dirty each robe you would then have something which didn't exactly look like d dream of enly fling the terrible eously. So rminedly ecalled" John Watson, but which those who knew him would find hauntingy amiliar He was tall and he gangled. marsdaydream: drinkmasturbatecry: nudityandnerdery: the-fandoms-are-valentines: grandtheftautosanandreas: Douglas Adams is the best when it comes to describe characters they need to teach classes on Douglas Adams analogies okay “He leant tensely against the corridor wall and frowned like a man trying to unbend a corkscrew by telekinesis.” “Stones, then rocks, then boulders which pranced past him like clumsy puppies, only much, much bigger, much, much harder and heavier, and almost infinitely more likely to kill you if they fell on you.” “He gazed keenly into the distance and looked as if he would quite like the wind to blow his hair back dramatically at that point, but the wind was busy fooling around with some leaves a little way off.” “It looked only partly like a spaceship with guidance fins, rocket engines and escape hatches and so on, and a great deal like a small upended Italian bistro.” “If it was an emotion, it was a totally emotionless one. It was hatred, implacable hatred. It was cold, not like ice is cold, but like a wall is cold. It was impersonal, not as a randomly flung fist in a crowd is impersonal, but like a computer-issued parking summons is impersonal. And it was deadly - again, not like a bullet or a knife is deadly, but like a brick wall across a motorway is deadly.” And, of course: “The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don’t.” the one that will always stay with me is “Arthur Dent was grappling with his consciousness the way one grapples with a lost bar of soap in the bath,” i feel like that was the first time i really understood what you could do with words. I will reblog this every time I see it because these are some of my favorite sentences in the English language.
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Books, David Bowie, and Puppies: ch in fully k tti Chapter 3 1 ng he west ing car and f you took a couple of David Bowies and stuck one of the David Bowies on the top of the other David Bowie, then attached another David Bowie to the end of each of the arms of the upper of the first two David Bowies and wrapped the whole business up in a dirty each robe you would then have something which didn't exactly look like d dream of enly fling the terrible eously. So rminedly ecalled" John Watson, but which those who knew him would find hauntingy amiliar He was tall and he gangled. aeruh: marsdaydream: drinkmasturbatecry: nudityandnerdery: the-fandoms-are-valentines: grandtheftautosanandreas: Douglas Adams is the best when it comes to describe characters they need to teach classes on Douglas Adams analogies okay “He leant tensely against the corridor wall and frowned like a man trying to unbend a corkscrew by telekinesis.” “Stones, then rocks, then boulders which pranced past him like clumsy puppies, only much, much bigger, much, much harder and heavier, and almost infinitely more likely to kill you if they fell on you.” “He gazed keenly into the distance and looked as if he would quite like the wind to blow his hair back dramatically at that point, but the wind was busy fooling around with some leaves a little way off.” “It looked only partly like a spaceship with guidance fins, rocket engines and escape hatches and so on, and a great deal like a small upended Italian bistro.” “If it was an emotion, it was a totally emotionless one. It was hatred, implacable hatred. It was cold, not like ice is cold, but like a wall is cold. It was impersonal, not as a randomly flung fist in a crowd is impersonal, but like a computer-issued parking summons is impersonal. And it was deadly - again, not like a bullet or a knife is deadly, but like a brick wall across a motorway is deadly.” And, of course: “The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don’t.” the one that will always stay with me is “Arthur Dent was grappling with his consciousness the way one grapples with a lost bar of soap in the bath,” i feel like that was the first time i really understood what you could do with words. I will reblog this every time I see it because these are some of my favorite sentences in the English language. @forest-of-books
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Arguing, Bad, and Children: "Children who participate in play with The Elf on the Shelf doll have to contend with rules at all times during the day: they may not touch the doll, and they must accept that the doll watches them at all times with the purpose of reporting to Santa Claus." The Elf on the Shelf is preparing your child to live in a future police state, professor warns washingtonpost.com cornerof5thandvermouth: earthy-phoenix: drwhohipster: drst: mhalachai: rainnecassidy: This is such a good article though The argument Pinto makes is that the story and the doll normalize 24-hour surveillance in the mind of a child, which makes them susceptible to more passively accept police-state surveillance as adults. “I don’t think the elf is a conspiracy and I realize we’re talking about a toy,” Pinto told The Post. “It sounds humorous, but we argue that if a kid is okay with this bureaucratic elf spying on them in their home, it normalizes the idea of surveillance and in the future restrictions on our privacy might be more easily accepted.” It’s based in a theory that was developed by Jeremy Bentham and popularized by Michel Foucault in which students, prisoners, factory workers and others were thought to function better (for whatever value of better) in a system called a panopticon, in which an individual is potentially under surveillance 24-hours a day, but never actually KNOWS whether or not he or she is being surveilled.  Pinto said she’s not the first person to be troubled by Elf on the Shelf’s surveilling. She’s said parents routinely contact her to say they changed the rules of the game after it made their families uneasy. And many kids, she said, often intuitively feel like spying and being a tattletale is wrong. “A mom e-mailed me and told me that the first day they read the elf book and put the elf out, her daughter woke up crying because she was being watched by the elf,” Pinto recounted. “They changed the game so it wouldn’t scare the child.” In addition to the problem of normalizing surveillance in the mind of a child, this also forces the child into a situation where they never feel like they are free to simply be themselves; they are forced to be “on their best behavior” at all times, unable to relax and make mistakes and do the job of growing up and being a child, because they never know if the elf is spying on them, ready and waiting to report back to Santa Claus that they’ve been bad. Here is a link to the paper that the article is talking about My co-worker got Elf on the Shelf for her four-year-old daughter last year, and was so freaked out by her daughter’s sudden and complete change in behaviour (uncharacteristically worried and anxious, while trying to be on her ‘best’ behaviour that she never kept up for family or at school) that she stuffed Elf in the garbage after a week, telling the daughter that the Elf had to go back to the North Pole to help Santa with Christmas.  Also read the paper linked above, it’s a good one. I hate this entire concept so much. I hadn’t thought about that but the far reaching implications are horrifying Honestly what a creepy idea :\Kids do best when given basic human respect, which behavior-judging surveillance is unrelated to. Holy shit. i now feel much more justified thinking that fuckshit elf is creepy as fuck
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Ali, Bad, and Baked: The Goat Pharoah Wild and totemic, this is a beard for leaders and mystics alike. Equally at home in an elder's meeting or an impromptu worship jam, this is a beard with attitude, and a gentle yet feral energy well suited to a variety of pastoral activities. A field guide for pastoral facial hair. The Guru Goatee Statistics sound best when spoken through the gentle o ocurtain of this gem. Urbane, but not foppish; neat, but with a slight bad boy" flair, it brings that Palo Alto panache without too much West Coast Church Planter Like a fickering shadow under the lower lip, this style puts the "soul" in "soul patch." I don't care who you are, where you're from, this tuft will draw a crowd. Watch carefully though: it's here now, but could be gone by next week's simulcast The Orthodox You'll have a schism with your razor after seeing this beauty. Timeless, yet urbane, this is the beard for the discerning priest of a more Eastern persuasion. Pair with heavy incense. Post-Evangelical Stubble This "IO o clock shadow is more than a statement, it is an implicit philosophical challenge to the entire Evangelical tribe. For too long, we have put pastors in boxes. This casual spattering of hair is both noncom- mittal and a needed reaction against the absurd varnished forms of "how it's ali been thought about The Perennial Youth Pastor Unchanged since the late 90s, this carefully maintained piece clings desperately to the lower lip; like the last green leaf refusing to admit that fall has come. Often seen above skate shoes and superhero t-shirts. oO The Reformed Calvin. Enough saicd Ge-neva have to shave again. The Anabaptist From pasturing to pastoring, this glorious neck beard ("neard") flourishes out from strong Teutonic chins around the world. It's all about community But it's not just for rural brethrenl Nay, an urban Sitz im Leben fits this bold style too. The Neo-Reformed Rigid and unyielding from the front, yet supple and welcoming If approached with filial respect Scented like dark beer and sweet pipe tobacco. You could smother an Arminian with that mess. No one is good enough to wear this, thou groveling worm. A pox on thee for e'en thinking of't! Yet mercy abounds, as does the attractiveness of this carefully trimmed masterwork. But not through any merit of the wearer's, lest our pride break all bounds. The Patchtivist Whether standing in solidarity with the urban poor never looked as chic as this patchy leader of a quiet S5A manifesto of style, this is the true face of the people shooting a documentary on Christian bourgeoisity, Che The Hawg Preacher If blue-collar style gets your motor running, you'll want to head out on the highway for this preacher's mobile sermons. Complete the look with leather chaps embroidered with scripture references, a practical vehicle for evangelism on-the-go. revolution. Viva la Kingdom! This beard loves you, but will never ever llke you. Pair ONLY AND ALWAYS WITH A 6ll AUTHORIZED VERSION OF THE KING JAMES BIBLE. DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO TURN OFF CAPS LOCK The Hipster Pastor This carefully sculpted mustache curves in a gentle sweep over the lip for an ironic 1890's look. Often complemented by a fiannel shirt, messenger bag, and The S It is rumored that the few preachers tro calculator watch. Look for stains of macchiato foam or crumbs from locally baked scones on this chic style statement. SOwho can grow this masterpiece find that their vocal projection triples. In any case, as old Charles Haddon himself said: "Growing a beard 'is a habit most natural, scriptural, manly, and beneficial."
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