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Advice, Ass, and Bad: the biggest lie, i think, the intemet perpetuates about D&D is that a skinny ittle twink of a bard just needs to roll a nat 20 to seduce a dragon ike a dragon...a creature with more wealth and power than any other creature on the planet..a creature who is easily an 11/10 when they deign to take humanoid formwould look at your skinny little 8 STR half-elf Bard whose own father doesn't even love them and go...yeah I'd like to fuck that Counterpoint, my good man: Bragonsuck Dragons fuck, clearly, but not just any joe blow schmoe with a big Charisma stat. If I'm Joseph J Dragon sitting on a small hill of gold and jewels I'm not gonna waste my time boning every monsterfucking tiefling twink with a lyre. I would have standards. dragons are SUPER horny counterpoint: even if dragons are SUPER horny they've got better prospects than spindly little bards!lll They could be off fucking cloud giants or beholders or planetars!!ll They could be having sex with kraken in the middle of the ocean or fire giants in the mouth of an erupting There is a wealth of sexual excess and opportunity available to dragons, so much that they do not need to be slumming it with an adventurer who hasn't washed his ass in a month and a half and is probably covered in kobold blood by the time they get to the dragon's lairl I don't care how many times you cast Charm Monster, the Elder Dragon who has probably slept with more princesses than there are princedoms is not going to bitel When you have bedded the most beautiful mortals on the Prime Material Plane on a pile of gold and jewelry you are not gonna be looking twice at any MOTHERFUCKEr who can't at least True Polymorph to make things interesting you're right but please shut up you are actively ruining my 10 strength half-elf twink bard's sexual prospects with this post OP is right and they should say it Dragon Bf Giont Gnol Gobin Haiting Koboid Spite As we can see from this most excellent chart, dragons can and will fuck anything. Even humans do not compare. The only species that can match dragons for homy-ness is, in fact, nymphs. Therefore your twinky-ass lil bard has as good a chance as anyone. Go forth and thot your way through your DM's carefully planned Big Bad encounter and fuck the dragon. I'm not even sure where I stand on this argument but I absolutely need to keep that chart for reference, so That chart is not proof that a dragon would fuck anything and youre a charlatan for pretending it does!!! That is a crossbreeding chart not a horny chart, and it says right on it that what it is tracking is the likelyhood that a union between two races would yield offspring. It is NOT saying that a dragon WILL fuck any of those creatures, just that doing so would result in a half-dragon child If anything this just proves siderealsandman's point the dragon could have any creature or being under the sun so why the fuck would it ever settle for a shitty PC and their+1 light leather amor. What's the bard gonna say?? You should fuck me because you techically can?? That bitch getting sauteed OP IS CORRECT SORRY BUT THE TWINK BARD ISNT GETTING ANY DRAGON ASS a dragon fucked a donkey in shrek, your argument is invalid Don't bring shrek into this OH YEAH?? YOU WANNA DO THIS?? FINE CLASS TRAITS OF A BARD 1) Your spells inspire and invigorate your allies-Donkey's role in the film was to inspire and invigorate Shrek to begin his hero's quest and keep him on his path 2) You channel magical power through words and music Doney never stopped talking or singing. That was his THING 3) Key abilities: Charisma, Intelligence, Constitution- Do we even need to question this?? Charisma - he managed to convince a dragon to fuck him He gave both Fiona and Shrek the pep-talk they needed to come to terms with their feelings. Intelligence-He's COLOR BLIND and stl managed to figure out the flowers Fiona asked for. Constitution-dude you saw the shit he managed to survive in that movie CONCLUSION-SHREK IS A DND CAMPAIGN, DONKEY IS A BARD THAT SEDUCED THE DRAGON. NEVER QUESTION ME IN MY HOUSE AGAIN advice-animal: How to Fuck your Dragon
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Ass, Bad, and Beautiful: the biggest lie, i think, the intemet perpetuates about D&D is that a skinny ittle twink of a bard just needs to roll a nat 20 to seduce a dragon ike a dragon...a creature with more wealth and power than any other creature on the planet..a creature who is easily an 11/10 when they deign to take humanoid formwould look at your skinny little 8 STR half-elf Bard whose own father doesn't even love them and go...yeah I'd like to fuck that Counterpoint, my good man: Bragonsuck Dragons fuck, clearly, but not just any joe blow schmoe with a big Charisma stat. If I'm Joseph J Dragon sitting on a small hill of gold and jewels I'm not gonna waste my time boning every monsterfucking tiefling twink with a lyre. I would have standards. dragons are SUPER horny counterpoint: even if dragons are SUPER horny they've got better prospects than spindly little bards!lll They could be off fucking cloud giants or beholders or planetars!!ll They could be having sex with kraken in the middle of the ocean or fire giants in the mouth of an erupting There is a wealth of sexual excess and opportunity available to dragons, so much that they do not need to be slumming it with an adventurer who hasn't washed his ass in a month and a half and is probably covered in kobold blood by the time they get to the dragon's lairl I don't care how many times you cast Charm Monster, the Elder Dragon who has probably slept with more princesses than there are princedoms is not going to bitel When you have bedded the most beautiful mortals on the Prime Material Plane on a pile of gold and jewelry you are not gonna be looking twice at any MOTHERFUCKEr who can't at least True Polymorph to make things interesting you're right but please shut up you are actively ruining my 10 strength half-elf twink bard's sexual prospects with this post OP is right and they should say it Dragon Bf Giont Gnol Gobin Haiting Koboid Spite As we can see from this most excellent chart, dragons can and will fuck anything. Even humans do not compare. The only species that can match dragons for homy-ness is, in fact, nymphs. Therefore your twinky-ass lil bard has as good a chance as anyone. Go forth and thot your way through your DM's carefully planned Big Bad encounter and fuck the dragon. I'm not even sure where I stand on this argument but I absolutely need to keep that chart for reference, so That chart is not proof that a dragon would fuck anything and youre a charlatan for pretending it does!!! That is a crossbreeding chart not a horny chart, and it says right on it that what it is tracking is the likelyhood that a union between two races would yield offspring. It is NOT saying that a dragon WILL fuck any of those creatures, just that doing so would result in a half-dragon child If anything this just proves siderealsandman's point the dragon could have any creature or being under the sun so why the fuck would it ever settle for a shitty PC and their+1 light leather amor. What's the bard gonna say?? You should fuck me because you techically can?? That bitch getting sauteed OP IS CORRECT SORRY BUT THE TWINK BARD ISNT GETTING ANY DRAGON ASS a dragon fucked a donkey in shrek, your argument is invalid Don't bring shrek into this OH YEAH?? YOU WANNA DO THIS?? FINE CLASS TRAITS OF A BARD 1) Your spells inspire and invigorate your allies-Donkey's role in the film was to inspire and invigorate Shrek to begin his hero's quest and keep him on his path 2) You channel magical power through words and music Doney never stopped talking or singing. That was his THING 3) Key abilities: Charisma, Intelligence, Constitution- Do we even need to question this?? Charisma - he managed to convince a dragon to fuck him He gave both Fiona and Shrek the pep-talk they needed to come to terms with their feelings. Intelligence-He's COLOR BLIND and stl managed to figure out the flowers Fiona asked for. Constitution-dude you saw the shit he managed to survive in that movie CONCLUSION-SHREK IS A DND CAMPAIGN, DONKEY IS A BARD THAT SEDUCED THE DRAGON. NEVER QUESTION ME IN MY HOUSE AGAIN How to Fuck your Dragon
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Bad, Prince, and Tumblr: 2 big-bad-bazz-brigade: Reblog long tailed Prince Sidon and his awesome sister Princess Mipha for 10 years good luck.

big-bad-bazz-brigade: Reblog long tailed Prince Sidon and his awesome sister Princess Mipha for 10 years good luck.

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Bad, Vape, and Army: DJ Big Bad Beats emerging from his world record vape cloud as he announces his new album, 7 Vaption Army.

DJ Big Bad Beats emerging from his world record vape cloud as he announces his new album, 7 Vaption Army.

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Bad, Horses, and Life: Why tock-tick does not sound right to your ears ver wondered why we say gin-material-purpose noun. So you can have a lovely little old rectangular green French silver whittling knife. But if you mess with that word order in the slightest you'll sound tick-tock, not tock tick, or ding-dong, not dong. ding; King Kong, not Kong King? Turns out it is one of the unwritten rules of English that na- tive speakers know without knowing like a maniac" The rule, explains a BBC article, is: "If there are three words then the order has to go I, A, O. If there are two words then the first is I and the sec- ond is either A or O. Mish mash, chit-chat, dilly-dally shilly-shally tip top, hip-hop, lip-flop, tic tac, sing song, ding dong, King Kong, ping pong That explains why we say "little green men" not "green little men," but "Big Bad Wolf" sounds like a gross violation of the "opinion (bad)-size (big) noun (wolf" order It won't, though, if you recall the first rule about the I-A-O order That rule seems inviolable: "All four of a horse's feet make exactly the same sound. But we always, always say clip-clop, nev There's another unwrittern rule at work in the name Little Red Riding Hood, says the article. er clop-clip." g. This rule even has a techni- cal name, if you care to know it-the rule of ablaut reduplica- tion-but then life is simpler knowing that we know the rule Adjectives in English abso O lutely have to be in this order: opinion-size-age-shape-colour-ori without knowing it. PLAY IT BY EAR: If a word sequence sounds wrong, it is probably wrong For more: BBC nordic-at-heart: Today on “rules of English language I didn’t realise were a thing until someone pointed it out”
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Ass, Bad, and Crying: When yo homie slap your ass and say good game but y'all playing rock- paper-scissors @typicalterome 0 Think the clouds are clogging up my brain Like the weather drain same as the tears on my face And I'm stuck up in the storm eye I guess I'll be alright Oh (uh oh uh oh) Oh oh (uh oh uh oh) Then it hits me like Oh (uh oh uh oh) Oh no (uh oh uh oh uh uh oh) And you're that wind that swept me off my feet Got me flying til I'm crying and I'm down on my knees That's what Dorothy was afraid of The sneaky tornado Oh (uh oh uh oh) Oh oh (uh oh uh oh) There's no place like home (Uh oh uh oh) Home (uh oh uh oh uh uh oh) I'm boarding up the windows Locking up my heart It's like every time the wind blows I feel it tearing us apart Every time he smiles I let him in again Everything is fine When you're standing in the eye of the hurricane Here comes the sun, here comes the rain Standing in the eye of the hurricane Here comes the sun, here comes the rain Standing in the eye of the hurricane I'm flopping on my bed like a flying squirrel Like a little girl hurt by the big bad world Yeah, it's twisting up my insides Can't hide it on the outside Oh (uh oh uh oh) Oh oh (uh oh uh oh) Yeah, it hits me like Oh (uh oh uh oh) Oh no (uh oh uh oh uh uh oh) And that's when you hold me, you hold me You tell me that you know me, I'll never be lonely Say we made it through the storm now But I'm still on the look out Oh (uh oh uh oh) Oh oh (uh oh uh oh) The air's getting cold (Uh oh uh oh) Cold I'm boarding up the windows Locking up my heart It's like every time the wind blows I feel it tearing us apart Every time he smiles I let him in again Everything is fine When you're standing in the eye of the hurricane Here comes the sun, here comes the rain Standing in the eye of the hurricane Here comes the sun, here comes the rain Standing in the eye of the hurricane He picks me up like He's got the way of the hurricane And I think I'm fine like I'm in the eye of the hurricane He picks me up like He's got the way of the hurricane And I think I'm fine like I'm in the eye of the hurricane And I'm floating, floating And I don't know when, know when I'm gonna drop He's got the way, he's got the way.
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Bad, Clock, and Dude: platy pusdoggo AREA 5 AREA 69 AREA Now, everybody from the 313 Put your motherfucking hands up and follow me! Everybody from the 313 Put your motherfucking hands up! Look, look... Now, while he stands tough Notice that this man did not have his hands up This Free World's got you gassed up Now, who's afraid of the Big Bad Wolf? 1, 2, 3, and to the 4; 1 Pac, 2 Pac, 3 Pac, 4 4 Pac, 3 Pac, 2 Pac, 1 You're Pac, he's Pac, no Pac, none This guy ain't no motherfucking MC I know everything he's 'bout to say against me I am white, I am a fucking bum I do live in a trailer with my mom My boy Future is an Uncle Tom I do got a dumb friend named Cheddar Bob Who shoots himself in his leg with his own gun I did get jumped by all six of you chumps And Wink did fuck my girl I'm still standing here screaming, "Fuck the Free World!" Don't ever try to judge me, dude You don't know what the fuck I've been through But I know something about you You went to Cranbrook, that's a private school What's the matter, dog, you embarrassed? This guy's a gangster? His real name's Clarence And Clarence lives at home with both parents And Clarence parents have a real good marriage This guy don't wanna battle, he shook ‘Cause ain't no such things as halfway crooks He's scared to death, he's scared to look in his fucking yearbook; fuck Cranbrook! Fuck the beat, I'll go a cappella Fuck a Papa Doc, fuck a clock, fuck a trailer; fuck everybody! Fuck y'all if you doubt me! I'm a piece of fucking white trash, I say it proudly And fuck this battle, I don't wanna win, I'm outtie Here, tell these people something they don't know about me.
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