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Ass, Dude, and Empire: sleepydumpling: welkinalauda: tikkunolamorgtfo: xmasterassassinx: winterpunk: xekstrin: crackrockdebby: d–i–y—-orgasms: be-blackstar: tikkunolamorgtfo: WATCH THIS: MAN SHUTS DOWN ANTISEMITIC WHITE POWER PREACHER One of my friends in the Boston area took this video and gave me permission to post it. She writes: “ I stood there for twenty minutes, easily. Hitler Youth kept trying to preach about “the evils of the Jews” and the big guy barely let him get a word in edgewise. At one point, the big guy yelled, “I will be here ALL DAY” and the crowd cheered.” I promise this will be the best thing you see today. Where’s a goddamn bullhorn when you need it? wow that preacher is probably shitting his pants low key with some big ass biker that close to his face  Caption for those who need it– the guy in the suit is saying shit like “all races must serve us as put here by God” and a lot of racist/anti Semitic drivel. Every time he opens his mouth to speak though, the biker yells “AHHHHHHH!!!” Until the man in the suit shuts up again. When the man in the suit takes a breath and opens his mouth, the biker doesn’t even let him get started and just screams “AHHHHH”…. This happens a few times. The guy in the suit plows ahead but the biker screams and says “No no no no!!!” I love biker dude Make racists afraid again. Um, sorry, but the guy in the suit deserves to speak his opinions. How’d you like to get screamed at everything time you spoke about what you are passionate about? I’m not saying I agree with his opinion, but that doesn’t make shutting him down like this right. Freedom of Speech. Just agree to disagree and walk away. 1) Freedom of Speech means you have the right to speak your mind without being punished or censored by the government. It does not mean other people have to listen to you, and it does not mean they can’t yell over you if you’re saying something disgusting and inflammatory. The Biker Dude has just as much right to do what he’s doing as the Neo-Nazi. Nobody’s right is being infringed upon here. 2) The guy is “passionate about” hating and inciting violence against Jews. I’m passionate about information literacy, candle-making, and giving snuggles to my pet rabbit. There’s a fucking difference, there.  3) “Agree to disagree” is something you say when two people can’t come to a consensus over whether or not The Empire Strikes Back is the best Star Wars movie. It’s not something you say when one person is Jewish and the other person believes Jews are a evil satanic cabal trying to enslave the white race who must be stopped at all costs. That’s not an “agree to disagree” topic. We don’t “agree to disagree” over the issue of whether or not Jews are people. We don’t “agree to disagree” over whether or not black people, immigrants, Muslims, LGBTQ folks, etc. are deserving of basic human rights. These things are not up for debate, and there is no middle-ground to be had with people who think otherwise.  “I can’t remember where I heard this, but someone once said that defending a position by citing free speech is sort of the ultimate concession; you’re saying that the most compelling thing you can say for your position is that it’s not literally illegal to express.”– Randall Munroe Always reblog the anti-hate bikie.
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Beer, Craigslist, and Dad: NEEDED: Generic Father Figure for Backyard BBQ (Spokane) 6 fflehoneubee.com To interested individuals, We will be throwing a backyard BBQ on June 17th to celebrate beer and each other. We range in age from 21-26, and while most of us know how to operate a grill, none of us are prepared to fill the role of "BBQ Dad" That being said, we are in need of a generic father figure from 4PM to about 8PM (though you may stay the full duration of the party). Duties include: Grilling hamburgers and hotdogs (whilst drinking beer Bringing your own grill (though this is subject to change. We will provide all of the meat) Refer to all attendees as "Big Guy', "Chief", "Sport" "Champ" etc. (whilst drinking beer) Talk about dad things, like lawnmowers, building your own deck, Jimmy Buffet, etc. Funny anecdotes are highly encouraged. All whilst drinking beer. Desired experience: A minimum of 18 vears experience as a father A minimum of 10 years grilling experience An appreciation of a nice, cold beer on a hot summer We can't pay you in money, BUT we can give you all the food and cold beer vour heart desires. Grill for a few hours, then sit back and crack open a few cold ones with the boys. THIS IS A REAL AD. Do not hesitate to call if you are interested. Preference will be given to applicants named Bill, Randy, or Dave hydok: sothatjusthappened90: insanelycoolish: impuretale: drunp: this is peak Craigslist I want to know if they got answers.  I really wanna know how this turned out. Just so you guys know. cracking open 500 cold ones with the dads

hydok: sothatjusthappened90: insanelycoolish: impuretale: drunp: this is peak Craigslist I want to know if they got answers.  I really...

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Beer, Craigslist, and Dad: NEEDED: Generic Father Figure for Backyard BBQ (Spokane) 6 fflehoneubee.com To interested individuals, We will be throwing a backyard BBQ on June 17th to celebrate beer and each other. We range in age from 21-26, and while most of us know how to operate a grill, none of us are prepared to fill the role of "BBQ Dad" That being said, we are in need of a generic father figure from 4PM to about 8PM (though you may stay the full duration of the party). Duties include: Grilling hamburgers and hotdogs (whilst drinking beer Bringing your own grill (though this is subject to change. We will provide all of the meat) Refer to all attendees as "Big Guy', "Chief", "Sport" "Champ" etc. (whilst drinking beer) Talk about dad things, like lawnmowers, building your own deck, Jimmy Buffet, etc. Funny anecdotes are highly encouraged. All whilst drinking beer. Desired experience: A minimum of 18 vears experience as a father A minimum of 10 years grilling experience An appreciation of a nice, cold beer on a hot summer We can't pay you in money, BUT we can give you all the food and cold beer vour heart desires. Grill for a few hours, then sit back and crack open a few cold ones with the boys. THIS IS A REAL AD. Do not hesitate to call if you are interested. Preference will be given to applicants named Bill, Randy, or Dave hydok: sothatjusthappened90: insanelycoolish: impuretale: drunp: this is peak Craigslist I want to know if they got answers.  I really wanna know how this turned out. Just so you guys know. cracking open 500 cold ones with the dads

hydok: sothatjusthappened90: insanelycoolish: impuretale: drunp: this is peak Craigslist I want to know if they got answers.  I really ...

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Beautiful, Beer, and Craigslist: NEEDED: Generic Father Figure for Backyard BBQ (Spokane) 6 fflehoneubee.com To interested individuals, We will be throwing a backyard BBQ on June 17th to celebrate beer and each other. We range in age from 21-26, and while most of us know how to operate a grill, none of us are prepared to fill the role of "BBQ Dad" That being said, we are in need of a generic father figure from 4PM to about 8PM (though you may stay the full duration of the party). Duties include: Grilling hamburgers and hotdogs (whilst drinking beer Bringing your own grill (though this is subject to change. We will provide all of the meat) Refer to all attendees as "Big Guy', "Chief", "Sport" "Champ" etc. (whilst drinking beer) Talk about dad things, like lawnmowers, building your own deck, Jimmy Buffet, etc. Funny anecdotes are highly encouraged. All whilst drinking beer. Desired experience: A minimum of 18 vears experience as a father A minimum of 10 years grilling experience An appreciation of a nice, cold beer on a hot summer We can't pay you in money, BUT we can give you all the food and cold beer vour heart desires. Grill for a few hours, then sit back and crack open a few cold ones with the boys. THIS IS A REAL AD. Do not hesitate to call if you are interested. Preference will be given to applicants named Bill, Randy, or Dave captainrogerss: asexual-not-asexual-detective: drunp: this is peak Craigslist Beautiful and wholesome Omg it really did happen tho 😭👏 https://www.distractify.com/humor/2018/06/05/ZnAVyw/craigslist-bbq-dad-ad

captainrogerss: asexual-not-asexual-detective: drunp: this is peak Craigslist Beautiful and wholesome Omg it really did happen tho 😭👏...

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The Neighbourhood, Big, and Guy: Big guy from the neighbourhood of my company's building must have had a long night.

Big guy from the neighbourhood of my company's building must have had a long night.

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Cat, Big, and New: This is our new cat nacho, he's a big guy, but loves it when you hold his paw

This is our new cat nacho, he's a big guy, but loves it when you hold his paw

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Cats, Chill, and Energy: Stray cat sneaks into zoo enclosure, finds another cat... star-anise: fozmeadows: reajeasa: roachpatrol: rhube: BABIES!!! so the best thing about this is that bobcats, like just about every feline besides lions and domestic cats, are pretty solitary. they don’t really have friends. they aren’t really equipped to make friends.  domestic cats, on the other hand, do know how to make friends. they are friendly to the point that lots of feral cats live in colonies— the females hang out together, even raise kids together, and the males like to spend nonsexual time with their baby mommas. they groom each other, play around, and have a particular tail position to signal to one another— straight up with the tip curled— that they’re friendly and happy to see each other. cats learned how to be chill with each other in order to take full advantage of human food sources: an ancient granary supplies enough rats for a lot of cats, as does a modern lady with a big bag of frisky bits, so it would be a waste of time and energy for any one cat to try and stake the entire foodsource out for exclusive use. less fighting means more eating and resting which means a longer, nicer life and a lot more kittens.  so this stray cat, she obviously has no colony if she’s wandering around and sneaking into zoo enclosures, so she’s like ‘hey! there’s food here! what up, other cat, let’s be friends, let’s be friends and share that food’. and the bobcat is like ‘??????’ because actually wild cats are pretty cautious about initiating hostilities and anything new and aggressive makes them very worried. and the domestic cat is like ‘haha cool, ok, we’re friends now, big guy. no problems.’ and the bobcat is like ‘????? well…?? ok?’ and then they are friends.  the super interesting thing about most wild cat species is they don’t really have the capacity to make friends on their own, especially outside of sibling bonds, but, if someone comes along and does all the friend-making themselves, they’ll totally roll with it. zoo cats can get really attached to their caregivers— or, in this case, a very confident little calico demonstrating exactly why her species has been so darn successful over the last nine thousand years .  so anyway that is the best thing: bobcats are not equipped to make friends, but luckily for this bobcat this homeless lady did not give any shits and made friends anyway. and now they are both happy.  #THE FACT THAT THE KEY TO DOMESTIC CAT’S SUCCESS IS THAT THEY LEARNED  #THE MEANING OF FRIENDSHIP #IS A FUCKING HOOT I will never be over the floofpaws of the bobcat attempting loafstance in that first picture OH MY GOOOOOOOD LOOK A VIDEO OF THEM GROOMING AND HEADBUTTING EACH OTHER!!!
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Batman, Lmao, and Mood: For the Ones Who Have Nothing by Max Bellegard Characters & Places (c) DC comics I don't know why I went back to that store Maybe cause I never had any toys as a kid Figure going back with one more will swav him even further towards my side It's nice to see someone else be able to enjoy them Giving Bizarro that first doll really seemed to put him in a more agreeable mood And away from Black Mask And sure, part of me knows that showing the big guy a softer version of batman now Me and Bruce might not always see eye to eye but I've long since passed wanting to see him dead Might make him less inclined to hurt the real one later on Artemis? Knowing Black Mask I'm certain that's exactly what he has in mind And I thought the Amazons were overstocked for war. It could take years to sort through all of what this man has collected. Right now, however, my concern is only to find the bow of Ra. iological uclear rtillery BI OXIC The rest of this mess can be dealt with later, when the time comes. For whatever reason I can feel myself being drawn here. "Biological weaponry"? Surely he doesn't know a host is needed to use it Whatever the case may be. The bow is mine now. possumist: Figured I’d put the first few pages together in one post, they can otherwise be found separately here: https://possumist.tumblr.com/post/172863673096/rubs-hands-together-it-is-time-guess-who https://possumist.tumblr.com/post/173203849321/took-longer-than-i-was-hoping-but-pages-2-3-areMight keep adding to this post by reblogging and adding additional pages underneath in order to keep them together/in cronological order to make things easier. Let me know what you think would be best! Anywhos, hope you’re enjoying it so far, I’ve got a lot more planned to come ;D(Also, edited the colors a bit, hopefully for the better lmao)

possumist: Figured I’d put the first few pages together in one post, they can otherwise be found separately here: https://possumist.tumblr....

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Gif, God, and Soldiers: <p><a href="http://siryouarebeingmocked.tumblr.com/post/173242079473/friendly-neighborhood-ehrhardt" class="tumblr_blog">siryouarebeingmocked</a>:</p> <blockquote><p><a href="https://friendly-neighborhood-ehrhardt.tumblr.com/post/173092835561/bears-for-the-bear-god-prussianmemes" class="tumblr_blog">friendly-neighborhood-ehrhardt</a>:</p><blockquote> <p><a href="http://bears-for-the-bear-god.tumblr.com/post/173068225221/prussianmemes-fujisan-ni-noboru-hinode" class="tumblr_blog">bears-for-the-bear-god</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://prussianmemes.tumblr.com/post/173068049740/fujisan-ni-noboru-hinode-japanese-army-soldiers" class="tumblr_blog">prussianmemes</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://fujisan-ni-noboru-hinode.tumblr.com/post/161698880728/japanese-army-soldiers-watch-a-chinese-street" class="tumblr_blog">fujisan-ni-noboru-hinode</a>:</p> <blockquote><p>Japanese Army soldiers watch a Chinese street performer in Nanking, China, 1938.</p></blockquote> <figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="401" data-orig-width="720"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/647532fd01fad20beff5e99e9ee3fc73/tumblr_inline_p7e6d7jGKM1tn9r53_500.png" data-orig-height="401" data-orig-width="720"/></figure><figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="589" data-orig-width="1064"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/6a7a6cea7f53e3468ac0c50cb5bc34f9/tumblr_inline_p7e6d8iXOj1tn9r53_500.gif" data-orig-height="589" data-orig-width="1064"/></figure><p><a class="tumblelog" href="https://tmblr.co/mkMy4aLdPdD5lqHaTU-FUpQ">@usobooki</a> what’s going on big guy?</p> </blockquote> <p>JAPAN DINDU NUFFIN</p> </blockquote> <p>moments after this picture was taken he dropped the bowl &amp; they stabbed him to death with their bayonets.</p> </blockquote> <blockquote><p>#<a href="https://friendly-neighborhood-ehrhardt.tumblr.com/tagged/a-guy-balanced-a-bowl-for-some-soldiers-and-that-means-japan-dindu-nuffin">a guy balanced a bowl for some soldiers and that means japan dindu nuffin</a> <br/></p></blockquote><p>Does this count as racebaiting?</p></blockquote> <p>Oh for fucks sake are we really doing this?</p>
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Bad, Books, and College: tumblr Follow bitchhpunk debrides I worked with toddlers and pre schoolers for three years. Sometimes I accidentally slip and tell a friend to say bye to an inanimate object (say bye bus!) & occasionally they unthinkingly just do it I'm glad there's a teacher version of accidentally called teacher mom when I worked at Medieval Times occasionally I would slip in real life and call people my lord" mugsandpugs1 One time during family prayer, dad began: "our father who art in heaven, American Airlines, how can I help you? thomrainierskies One time my dad went to the White Castle drive-thru and the lady (who was supposed to say Welcome to White Castle, what's your crave?) asked, "Welcome to White Castle, what's your problem? She apologized profusely while my dad proceeded to lose his shit laughing mirab3lle Yesterday I went to Wendy's and the girl said "Welcome to McDonalds" and then just sighed Somebody in the elevator asked me what floor I lived on, and I answered please open your books to page eight", and we just kind of stared at each other blinking i work retail full time and my script gets frequently messy - ill ask the same question twice, or say "$2.60 is your total while handing back their change, or say "how are you doing today?" instead of "have a good day! like name it ive bungled it but anyway, this lady came thru my line buying a book and the review on the front said: 'few books are well written, fewer still are important, and this book manages to be both as i handed her the bag i was trying to say thanks, youre all set and instead my brain mashed up the review and i said thanks, youre important there was this short pause in which i tried to figure out what the fuck id just said she blinked and then said "oh thank youl youre important tool the real kicker was one of my coworkers. when i was relating this story later his response was "at least you said something NICE. last week i accidentally combined youre welcome and 'no problem into youre a problem" one time, since I used to work as a daycare teacher with preschoolers, i was on my college campus in my gym, and someone was running in the weight room and tripped over a machine and fell, and instead of offering to help, I just stared and said, This is why we use our walking feet. we both sat there for a while until the guy nodded and said, yeah, okay, i should've done that." gin-and-eschatonic I've spent a good chunk of time working in kitchens, so I still will reflexively say shit like "behind and "coming around" as I maneuver through spaces and around people which, actually not such a bad thing. I'm a big guy and can come across as imposing pretty easily. The position calls can help defuse that, and also help avoid collisions Less good is the time my brain was half functional and I let slip a coming with a knife" while grocery shopping. THAT took some explaining I work in an office and send tens of emails to customers every day. Once my Hello mum, as agreed, please find attached the ticked you requested. Thanks, Alex narwhalsarefalling i worked as a camp counselor, and i would have the kids tap somewhere on my legs if they needed something because im a pretty tall dude. today asked my cat if he needed something sugar4ndroses I have woken up in a cold sweat saying is that for here or to go? only-in-movies Conversely, in my old job I rarely answered outside calls so was only used to picking up to colleagues in random ways. So one day while fixing something at a different desk I answered what I thought was an internal call with "how do, I have usurped admin only to realise it was external and a board member on the line The CEO banned me from the phones while trying not to laugh I have worked in a variety of café/restaurant jobs, and in my most recent cafe job people were allowed to bring their leashed dogs through the line with them. One day someone came through the line with an adorable pup, and when the dog looked up at me as I was checking them out, I said "would you like that dog for here or to go? Source debrides 438,007 notes Brain glitch stories
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Bad, Books, and College: tumblr Follow bitchhpunk debrides I worked with toddlers and pre schoolers for three years. Sometimes I accidentally slip and tell a friend to say bye to an inanimate object(say bye bus) & occasionally they unthinkingly just do it autisticcole I'm glad there's a teacher version of accidentally called teacher 'mom when I worked at Medieval Times occasionally I would slip in real life and call people my lord One time during family prayer, dad began: our father who art in heaven, American Airlines, how can I help you? One time my dad went to the White Castle drive-thru and the lady (who was supposed to say Welcome to White Castle, what's your crave?) asked, "Welcome to White Castle, what's your problem? She apologized profusely while my dad proceeded to lose his shit laughing. Yesterday I went to Wendy's and the girl said "Welcome to McDonalds" and then just sighed Somebody in the elevator asked me what floor I lived on, and I answered please open your books to page eight, and we just kind of stared at each other, blinking work retail full time and my script gets frequently messy -ill ask the same question twice, or say $2.60 is your total" while handing back their change, or say "how are you doing today?" instead of have a good day! like name it ive bungled it but anyway, this lady came thru my line buying a book and the review on the front said: Tew books are well wntten, fewer still are important, and this book manages to be both as i handed her the bag i was trying to say "thanks, youre all set and instead my brain mashed up the review and i said thanks, youre important there was this short pause in which i tried to figure out what the fuck id just said. she blinked and then said oh thank you! youre important too! the real kicker was one of my coworkers. when i was relating this story later his response was "at least you said something NICE last week i accidentally combined youre welcome' and 'no problem' into 'youre a problem agrestenoir one time, since I used to work as a daycare teacher with preschoolers, i was on my college campus in my gym, and someone was running in the weight room and tripped over a machine and fell, and instead of offering to help, I just stared and said, This is why we use our walking feet we both sat there for a while until the guy nodded and said, yeah, okay, i should ve done that. I've spent a good chunk of time working in kitchens, so I still will reflexivey say shit like behind" and coming around as I maneuver through spaces and around people. Which, actually, not such a bad thing. I'm a big guy and can come across as mposing pretty easily. The position calls can help defuse that, and also help avoid collisions. Less good is the time my brain was half functional and I let slip a coming with a knife" while grocery shopping. THAT took some explaining I work in an office and send tens of emails to customers every day. Once my Hello mum, as agreed, please find attached the ticked you requested. Thanks Alex i worked as a camp counselor, and i would have the kids tap somewhere on my legs if they needed something because im a pretty tall dude. today asked my cat t he needed something I have woken up in a cold sweat saying is that for here or to go? only-in-movies Conversely, in my old job I rarely answered outside calls so was only used to picking up to colleagues in random ways. So one day while fixing something at a different desk I answered what I thought was an internal call with "how do, I have usurped admin" only to realise it was external and a board member on the line. The CEO banned me from the phones while trying not to laugh. I have worked in a variety of caté/restaurant jobs, and in my most recent cafe job people were allowed to bring their leashed dogs through the line with them. One day someone came through the line with an adorable pup, and when the dog looked up at me as I was checking them out, I said "would you like that dog for here or to go? only-in-movies Conversely, in my old job I rarely answered outside calls so was only used to picking up to colleagues in random ways. So one day while fixing something at a different desk I answered what I thought was an internal call with "how do, I have usurped admin" only to realise it was external and a board member on the line. The CEO banned me from the phones while trying not to laugh I have worked in a variety of caté/restaurant jobs, and in my most recent cafe job people were allowed to bring their leashed dogs through the line with them One day someone came through the line with an adorable pup, and when the dog looked up at me as I was checking them out, I said "would you like that dog for here or to go? Source debrides 438,007 notes Sometimes your brain just glitches
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Beer, Craigslist, and Dad: NEEDED: Generic Father Figure for Backyard BBQ (Spokane) 6 fflehoneubee.com To interested individuals, We will be throwing a backyard BBQ on June 17th to celebrate beer and each other. We range in age from 21-26, and while most of us know how to operate a grill, none of us are prepared to fill the role of "BBQ Dad" That being said, we are in need of a generic father figure from 4PM to about 8PM (though you may stay the full duration of the party). Duties include: Grilling hamburgers and hotdogs (whilst drinking beer Bringing your own grill (though this is subject to change. We will provide all of the meat) Refer to all attendees as "Big Guy', "Chief", "Sport" "Champ" etc. (whilst drinking beer) Talk about dad things, like lawnmowers, building your own deck, Jimmy Buffet, etc. Funny anecdotes are highly encouraged. All whilst drinking beer. Desired experience: A minimum of 18 vears experience as a father A minimum of 10 years grilling experience An appreciation of a nice, cold beer on a hot summer We can't pay you in money, BUT we can give you all the food and cold beer vour heart desires. Grill for a few hours, then sit back and crack open a few cold ones with the boys. THIS IS A REAL AD. Do not hesitate to call if you are interested. Preference will be given to applicants named Bill, Randy, or Dave <p><a href="http://friendly-neighborhood-patriarch.tumblr.com/post/170766193952/luv3horse-silverlightpony-drunp-this-is" class="tumblr_blog">friendly-neighborhood-patriarch</a>:</p><blockquote> <p><a href="http://luv3horse.tumblr.com/post/164653478181/silverlightpony-drunp-this-is-peak-craigslist" class="tumblr_blog">luv3horse</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://silverlightpony.tumblr.com/post/162259709552/drunp-this-is-peak-craigslist-not-only-did-they" class="tumblr_blog">silverlightpony</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://drunp.tumblr.com/post/161376664752/this-is-peak-craigslist" class="tumblr_blog">drunp</a>:</p> <blockquote><p>this is peak Craigslist</p></blockquote> <p>Not only did they get their “BBQ Dad”, they got <i>several</i>. :D<br/><br/><a href="https://thechive.com/2017/06/19/generic-craigslist-dad-comes-through/">https://thechive.com/2017/06/19/generic-craigslist-dad-comes-through/</a></p> </blockquote> <p>HAPPY ENDING YAY</p> </blockquote> <p>Awwww</p> </blockquote>

friendly-neighborhood-patriarch: luv3horse: silverlightpony: drunp: this is peak Craigslist Not only did they get their “BBQ Dad”, they g...

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