πŸ”₯ Popular | Latest

Birthday, College, and Elf: r/AskReddit Posted by u/pijeN57.11Hh What's the weird way you met one of your now best friends? Discussion 3.4k Share BEST COMMENTS GarunixReborn 11h We were at year 7 camp, and he ran... MinerOfStarDust 9 . 8h . One of my best friends an I m… CarterMT099 10h We were both trying to get with the sa. DaPretzelBoi 11h I threw a rock. I wasn't aiming at him, Frugal_Midwestern 10h I went to her birthday party in ki... PixelLaurs 10h My therapist told me it would be a good idea to make a friend. I disagreed because I thoughtI was doing just fine by myself, but then again I was in therapy for an attachment disorder so I wasn't really the expert on that. She eventually convinced me to give it a try, which I did mostly just to get her to stop bothering me about it. I had seen a girl walking around my college campus a few times wearing elf ears, so I thought, if I have to have a friend, that's the one I want. I approached her one day at lunch and started a conversation about the ears. As it turns out, she told me one of the reas- ons she wore them was as a conversation starter to help her make friends. I told her it worked and asked her flat out if she wanted to be friends because social interaction is hard and I didn't know how else to go about it. Well, it turns out my therapist was right. The elf-ear girl was my maid of honor when I got married last August, but I had to ask her not to wear them during the ceremony. :) Reply 3.9k This is wholesome in the true sense.

This is wholesome in the true sense.

Anaconda, College, and God: PIRITS bookhobbit why is "olde vampires in high school" the big thing and not "olde vampires in college" everyone in college is eccentric. everyone you wanna wear full on Victorian suit? the girl in pajamas who clearly hasn't slept in three days supports you everyone is too preoccupied to care as long as you're polite and follow class etiquette multiple high school diplomas? eh. same stuff. multiple BAs? Enjoy learning chemistry AND art history! All in detail! wandering around campus at 3am? that's just the lifestyle tm * no matter how old or young you look it's not really that weird, there's sixteen year olds and sixty year olds doing BAs somewhere big schools are very anonymous so nobody's gonna bother to hassle you * anorthernskyatdawn the girl in pyjamas is the vampire themauvesoul Also: If u put ur blood in a water bottle ppl will assume it's juice and be Jealous "Oh god I'm a monster" 20 students who r all procrastinating big projects say "same simultaniousely and with the exact same tone Everything is a joke so if u say "I subsist on the lifeblood of mankind" someone will go "lol what a mood* It would take u like 100 years to major in everything Seen sucking the blood of a fellow classmate and u r instantly the campus Cryptid and Mascoft Listen. If u have an ethical dilemma go find a philosophy major that believes in ethical subjectivism and they'll make u so angry u forget abt whatever the fuck was bothering u College is the only acceptable place to get into fistfights over classical literature * e * iterally all u need to do to avoid suspicion is be the guy that alway:s has qum and a stapler If u have a majestic mustache ppl will just assume ur an English major Allergic to crosses? Cool. So r certain stem majors. e * College Vampires
Click, Dude, and Frozen: kandrakelsierthe-formerone Follow lapushpaclk twilight but bella is accidentally super stoned every time edward does something weird and supernatural so she never actually notices or figures it out by herself, but she points it out every time and scares the hell out of him the cullens have had several code reds, all because edward's new lab partner keeps brushing up against him unintentionally and going "woan, dude. you re like, super cold" eventually, after months of them hanging out and her repeatedly missing key things he gradually makes more and more obvious he is literally sitting underneath the sun and sparkling, and she just squints at him, gives him a silly thumbs up, and then a high five shortly after he just gives up and tells her rosalielesbianhale edward being so fed up with keeping the secret from bella so they're lounging in the sun, with edward just waiting for it to click, for her to realise that he's not human bella spends so long looking at him with edward completely frozen in place waiting to see what her reaction will be. he's prepared for fear in her eyes, for her to scream, to distance herself from him or possibly run away. what he is not prepared for is her lazily trailing her finger down the length of his forearm and breathing out a single word. "pretty." she then falls back on the grass with her eyes closed enjoying the sun but edward is so outraged that he springs to his feet, not even bothering to move at a human pace and throws her words back in her face as if they were an affront. "pretty?? bella, this is the skin of a killer." bella just snorts, barely opening her eyes to look at him "okay, edgelord," there's a lazy smile on her face but she doesn't even bother to sit up before she continues, "edward, seriously, that's the skin of every teenage girl in the 90s and i admire your bravery in attempting to bring back body glitter but don't oversell it." hybridsins I stan stoner Bella morganfrederickrielly don't oversell it Stoner Bella

Stoner Bella

Saw, Shoes, and Dresses: rrabbed a Walking. ught so." He der mers came in b do Patrick Rothfuss with buckles. " ey're tight e Once I knew what was bothering me, left. Pear tends to ring me, the greater pa kne left. Fear tends to come from ignorance. es." He stripp Once I The it was just a problem, nothing to fear. about these? illsi t quite what5 ast. Nice olof As Tve mentioned, Tarbean has two Waterside was poor. Hillside was r They y weve a si #xia.le main sections: Waterside was poor. 1-illside was rich Waterside had thieves. HHillside had bankne ill-ai then.Β» hoss hensively I have already told the story of my the fot Instea of perhaps you will understand why. w to part f when the cro or a moment, I saw what I was my heart Po yself that I wasn I ducked through the nearest door I spent a moment reminding 1ys urchin who'd been beaten years ago like belonged here. But old habits ey red wond n veneral. Probably a little anger. but couldttellifIw De ih with you: came a s then I pressed my foor to good sboe a siple brown leallia ryself that I wasn't to, I was well-dresses them. 1 Pprehensively otten how won s die e slow deaths of answering b t t was angry at g he stood, and starteud seare tnings the can tell a lot aboia ere e of each cheexful voice trD Lihe from the fro s of shelved pairs o voie ne ct』rtain carry! and laungg ered up. But from a curta are the e people that bide thingrs e they try eo to look at ne. "It n ng is to lee chem aur know about that. s. I don't a egan to look ce again from the Cesmiled a atest tragec at were too co y,as if the joke n spite of myset adn't had shoes At least not durin Now yor for so lons eye,s were d.. ncing. Customer or not LITing my Ia ny teet were woul.d ha at seen alv they
Come Over, Dude, and Fucking: 0,A 24% 5:15 Bread Saturday 938 PM I'm ready to get this bread U sure about that?? Oh yeah, I'm always ready for bread Do you like bread? I fucking love bread Do you like getting choked? Saturday 1116 PM Excuse me? Oh c'mon, you know the 'Let's get this bread' meme but not the "Do you like bread" meme? What a disappointment ....I'm unaware of that meme Follow up question: Will you come over tomorrow? Ahhhhh l've been enlightened If you're gonna be bread you've gotta go all the way, dig deep, and become the bread you were meant to be Saturday 11:43 PM You're right I was so unprepared It's all rye-te. You'll do breader next time Damn I need to step my bread game up If you don't improve soon people like me are going to show you up and you'll be toast Today 12:52 AM FRANK you're killing me Sorry, I'm just on a roll Bread? I really can't think of anything damn I made this account for fun now I feel inadequate Wow, usually it's the other people on tinder making me feel inadequate, this is s nice change of pace. There's no need to feel sourdough, cheer up! You're a fuckin baller frank I'm glad I could help Thanks, now I don't feel so pita-ful anymore I've been hitting you with these bread puns naan-stop I hope it hasn't been bothering you too much I fuckin love it how are you so damn clever Are you googling bread puns Nope, just coming up with them off of the top of my bread Marry me I don't think I'm bready for that kind of commitment yet... I appreciate the offer dough My heart is broken frank You're just moving a little too fast for me is all. If we just slow down and take our time I promise it'll be worth the wheat Today 1:58 AM I loaf you There you go, now you're getting it. Donut give up you're doing great Well, it's time for me to bake a nap, I can hit you with more bread puns after my yeast rises out of bed in the morning You bread my mind!! Today 4:49 PM Btw do you mind if I post this conversation to Breaddit and get some karma? Today 5:15 PM Dude go for it GIF Type a I was bready for this