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Advice, America, and Bones: Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti forced a bot to watch over 1,O00 hours of Hallmark Christmas movies and then asked it to write a Hallmark Christmas movie of its own. Here is the first page. THE CHRISTMAS ON CHRISTMAS INT. SMALL TOWN SNON GLOBE REFILLERY We gee a SINGLE MOTHER refilling snow globes with chriotmas uice. She is widow. Her husband died in every war SINGLE MOTHER I refili globes better than Jesus Claus, yet still my twins are dad- free. Why? They need double dad BUSINESS MAN enter the shop. He wears clothes that cost money. His hands are briefcases, and he Hallmark hot SINGLE MOTHER (CONT D) Hİ. Do your now globes lack wet? Hurry. Christmess attacks soon Business Man has flashback to when he was Business Boy. A Christmas tree explodes his family on purpose. He now hates trees and Christmas and explosions. He exits the flashback BUSINESS MAN Shut your cound! I am from Hugo city. I bought your land and am turning it into an oil resort. SINGLE MOTHER Rude behavior! This is a family buainess. I sell families. I an id y husband is now bones. Single Mother points to her husband's bones in the corner of the room. They are all giftwrapped in eggnog BUSINESS MAN All of my wives are bones! That is America. But I must make money for my twins to live. They are a prince SINGLE MOTHER I too own twins. Please, don't have bought my land. Christmas is today BUSINESS MAN Laugh, I bought Christmas and now it is never. Unless we go on dates SINGLE MOTHER I cannot date because of a snow curse. I pray santa helps ne. Santa cannot help. She did not know but Santa was her husband. Santa is bones. Bones help nobody advice-animal: Christmas Is Bones. Bones don’t give

advice-animal: Christmas Is Bones. Bones don’t give

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America, Bones, and Christmas: Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti forced a bot to watch over 1,O00 hours of Hallmark Christmas movies and then asked it to write a Hallmark Christmas movie of its own. Here is the first page. THE CHRISTMAS ON CHRISTMAS INT. SMALL TOWN SNON GLOBE REFILLERY We gee a SINGLE MOTHER refilling snow globes with chriotmas uice. She is widow. Her husband died in every war SINGLE MOTHER I refili globes better than Jesus Claus, yet still my twins are dad- free. Why? They need double dad BUSINESS MAN enter the shop. He wears clothes that cost money. His hands are briefcases, and he Hallmark hot SINGLE MOTHER (CONT D) Hİ. Do your now globes lack wet? Hurry. Christmess attacks soon Business Man has flashback to when he was Business Boy. A Christmas tree explodes his family on purpose. He now hates trees and Christmas and explosions. He exits the flashback BUSINESS MAN Shut your cound! I am from Hugo city. I bought your land and am turning it into an oil resort. SINGLE MOTHER Rude behavior! This is a family buainess. I sell families. I an id y husband is now bones. Single Mother points to her husband's bones in the corner of the room. They are all giftwrapped in eggnog BUSINESS MAN All of my wives are bones! That is America. But I must make money for my twins to live. They are a prince SINGLE MOTHER I too own twins. Please, don't have bought my land. Christmas is today BUSINESS MAN Laugh, I bought Christmas and now it is never. Unless we go on dates SINGLE MOTHER I cannot date because of a snow curse. I pray santa helps ne. Santa cannot help. She did not know but Santa was her husband. Santa is bones. Bones help nobody Christmas Is Bones. Bones don’t give

Christmas Is Bones. Bones don’t give

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Being Alone, Ass, and Complex: 1/26/2018 To whom it may concern, It is with deep regret, and a heavy heart that I write this letter, but I must come forth with my intentions with sincerity and honesty. Certain events in my life have put me in a different place, and while it was one of the more taxing decisions I've had to make of late, it is the right one. The purpose of this letter is to end my relationship with Planet Fitness Orange I know I've been distant, but it's because I've changed. I have different needs now, and to be frank. you really haven't changed at all. You're still that bulky, purple and yellow building with the tootsie rolls at the counter. I don't want to change you, and it pains me to think that we were once one, but are now separate and in different places. Furthermore, I've moved onto and into a new facility (the gym at my apartment complex), with a state of the art whachamacallit that really tones my thighs and masters my ass in ways that were hitherto unknown, and at proximity that would make you blush if you were to think about it. I don't want you to be jealous, or to judge me based on this decision. That's not the Planet Fitness that I know and love. I still love you, but more like a friend at this point. I'm sorry things couldn't have been better us. between I still think fondly of you, and the time we spent together as I drive by one of your many locati Sometimes, when I'm alone, I even throw on one of my old "power-pop workout" playlists and feel the rush of our past course through me as if we were still one, holding hands with your elliptical machine, and gingerly brushing my sweaty bangs out of my face as I huff and puff in a tumultuous vortex of sweat and endorphins. However, all good things must come to an end, and I hope this letter finds you well. You just keep being you, and while we will both grow, it will be into our own new lives without each other. I think this is for the better. Yours in, Ch P.S. My wife also needs to cancel her membership. If you have any questions, please contact me at Planet Fitness wouldnt let me cancel over the phone, and required a certified letter to cancel since I live in a different state now. I dropped this in the mail today.
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A Dream, America, and Apparently: kropotklndersurprise April 25 2015 Protesters take to the streets in Baltimore to express their anger over the Death of Freddie Gray, who was murdered by police. [videol thedaylleftthewomb Yup. Protesting against violence with more violence. Because that totally fucking works.I swear to god these protesters are fucking stupid half the damn time. tuth9 They should probably learn about Martin Luther King Jr. Read his "I have a dream" speech, in which he specifically says violence will not help. kropotklndersurprise Or maybe You should learn more about MLK than the one speech by him that they constantly repeat because it is nice and friendly and toothless? Letter from Birmingham Jail (ext) By Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr., 16 April 1963 "First, I must confess that over the last few years I have been gravely disappointed with the white moderate. I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro's great stumbling block in the stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen's Council-er or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate who is more devoted to "order" than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice who constantly says "I agree with you in the goal you seek, but I can't agree with your methods of direct action;" who paternalistically feels he can set the timetable for another man's freedom; who lives by the myth of time and who constantly advises the Negro to wait until a "more convenient season." Shallow understanding from people of goodwill is more frustrating than absolute misunderstanding from people of ill will. Lukewarm acceptance is much more bewildering than outright rejection." A RIOT IS THE LANGUAGE OF THE UNHEARD gluten-free-pussY Whites need to keep MLK's name out their mouths before they catch this fade knowledgeequalsblackpower They use MLK's memory so casually. It's so disgusting!!!! <p><a class="tumblr_blog" href="http://siryouarebeingmocked.tumblr.com/post/149550947520">siryouarebeingmocked</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a>@kropotkindersurprise</a>, who apparently blocked me after <a href="http://siryouarebeingmocked.tumblr.com/post/139082422010/derpomatic-pardonmewhileipanic">this post</a>; <br/>Ironic that someone whose description brags that they post “riot gifs” and <b>endorses</b> violent <b>attacks </b>on people for <b>wrongthink</b> can’t handle online disagreement. Too bad <a href="http://siryouarebeingmocked.tumblr.com/post/147719809543/syabm-comic-30-rebel-yell-have-you-noticed-how">I already made a comic about it</a>. And while I’m here, @knowledgeequalsblackpower.</p> <p><b>“How dare you cherry-pick something MLK said, cracker! I’m going to shut you down by cherry-picking something MLK said!” </b> </p> <figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="282" data-orig-width="500" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/9959ab1b63e52032f5caf639a60d71c6/tumblr_o6xnhwrc2q1qgf1i8o1_500.gif"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/9959ab1b63e52032f5caf639a60d71c6/tumblr_inline_p7h3lmJQqV1rw09tq_540.gif" alt="" data-orig-height="282" data-orig-width="500" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/9959ab1b63e52032f5caf639a60d71c6/tumblr_o6xnhwrc2q1qgf1i8o1_500.gif"/></figure><h2> <b>Breaking news</b>: You’re all a bunch of lying hypocrites.</h2> <p><i>&gt;Several months ago the affiliate here in Birmingham asked us to be on call to engage in a <b>nonviolent</b> direct action program if such were deemed necessary. </i></p> <p><i>&gt;I hope you are able to see the distinction I am trying to point out. <b>In no sense do I advocate evading or defying the law,</b> as would the rabid segregationist. That would lead to anarchy. One who breaks an unjust law must do so openly, lovingly, and with a <b>willingness to accept the penalty</b>. I submit that an individual who breaks a law that conscience tells him is unjust, and who <b>willingly accepts the penalty of imprisonment</b> in order to arouse the conscience of the community over its injustice, is in reality expressing the highest respect for law.</i></p> <p><i>&gt;You may well ask: “Why direct action? Why sit ins, marches and so forth? Isn’t negotiation a better path?” You are quite right in calling for negotiation. Indeed, this is the very purpose of direct action. <b>Nonviolent</b> direct action seeks to create such a crisis and foster such a tension that a community which has constantly refused to negotiate is forced to confront the issue. It seeks so to dramatize the issue that it can no longer be ignored. My citing the creation of tension as part of the work of the <b>nonviolent</b> resister may sound rather shocking. But I must confess that I am not afraid of the word “tension.” I have earnestly <b>opposed violent tension</b>, but there is a type of <b>constructive, nonviolent tension</b> which is necessary for growth. Just as Socrates felt that it was necessary to create a tension in the mind so that individuals could rise from the bondage of myths and half truths to the unfettered realm of creative analysis and objective appraisal, so must we see the need for <b>nonviolent</b> gadflies to create the kind of tension in society that <b>will help men rise from the dark depths of prejudice and racism to the majestic heights of understanding and brotherhood.</b> The purpose of our direct action program is to create a situation so crisis packed that it will inevitably open the door to negotiation. I therefore concur with you in your call for negotiation. Too long has our beloved Southland been bogged down in a tragic effort to live in monologue rather than dialogue.</i></p> <p>&gt;.<i> My friends, I must say to you that we have not made a single gain in civil rights without determined legal and <b>nonviolent</b> pressure.</i></p> <p>-Letters from a Birmingham jail, MLK Jr.</p> <p>So the “<b>direct action</b>” he was talking about was, drumroll please, <b>nonviolent</b>. Specifically, non-violent. </p> <figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="243" data-orig-width="400" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/c7f9f1ddf249b15e79b86168389eff8d/tumblr_o50s92RMxT1s9a9yjo1_400.gif"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/c7f9f1ddf249b15e79b86168389eff8d/tumblr_inline_p7h3lnI1Ug1rw09tq_540.gif" alt="" data-orig-height="243" data-orig-width="400" data-orig-src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/c7f9f1ddf249b15e79b86168389eff8d/tumblr_o50s92RMxT1s9a9yjo1_400.gif"/></figure><p>In fact, it’s almost as if you <b>deliberately quoted</b> one of the few parts of the letter where he <b>doesn’t</b> use the term <b>“non-violence”</b>.</p> <h2>Pop quiz, geniuses. If MLK was really endorsing riots, w<b>hy aren’t you talking about all the times he rioted</b>?</h2> <p>&gt;<i>There’s no doubt about that. <b>I will agree that there is a group in the Negro community advocating violence now</b>. I happen to feel that this group represents a numerical minority. Surveys have revealed this. The vast majority of Negroes still feel that the best way to deal with the dilemma that we face in this country is through <b>non-violent resistance</b>, and I don’t think this vocal group will be able to make a real dent in the Negro community in terms of swaying 22 million Negroes to this particular point of view. And I contend that the cry of “black power” is, at bottom, a reaction to the reluctance of white power to make the kind of changes necessary to make justice a reality for the Negro. I think that we’ve got to see that <b>a riot is the language of the unheard</b>. And, what is it that America has failed to hear? It has failed to hear that the economic plight of the Negro poor has worsened over the last few years.</i></p> <p>&gt;<i>[…]So that I would say that every summer we’re going to have this kind of vigorous protest. My hope is that it will be non-violent. I would hope that we can avoid riots because  <b>riots are self-defeating and socially destructive.</b></i></p> <p><a href="http://www.cbsnews.com/news/mlk-a-riot-is-the-language-of-the-unheard/">http://www.cbsnews.com/news/mlk-a-riot-is-the-language-of-the-unheard/</a></p> </blockquote>
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