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Anaconda, Anna, and Community: hobbit-hole if i had to get in a fistfight with any member of the fellowship it would be Frodo because i would easily win hobbit-hole all i am saying is that he would ostensibly be the easiest one to take on in a fight given that he's like three feet tall and has led a life of (physical) leisure compared to all of the others due to his standing as a gentlehobbit legolas, aragorn, and gimli are all used to combat, sam works as a gardener merry and pippin often gallivant off and get into mischief so they have the advantage of experience in whatever it is they've gotten up to/would possibly fight dirty, gandalf is gandalf so while weapons are out of the question i suppose that depends on if magic is involved. i don't think i could take him without magic even if he is old because he's a very large guy, but maybe it would be my knuckles against Frodo's baby soft poet hands, plus rve got the additional height and fighting experience. i just think that he would be the easiest to win against in hand-to-hand combat out of the rest of them. also he isn't real so he can't offer a rebuttal to my claim penny-anna you're absolutely correct BUT wanting to fight Frodo makes you a monster D hobbit-hole this has nothing to do with WANTING to fight Frodo, i just think he would be easiest for me to beat in a fight with no weapons. unless he utilized his very large feet, but i think he's too polite to do that because it's a fist fight and that would be considered playing dirty penny anna for someone who doesn't want to fight Frodo you sure have put a lot of thought into fighting Frodo. animate-mush OP is wrong though: you fight Pippin. First off, Pippin has it coming, so you won't be fighting your conscience at the same time Secondly, Pippin is a spoiled rich kid. He's no less gentry than Frodo is, but Frodo works out and is shown to have better stamina, at least at the outset. Pippin is also both the stupidest and the slowest of the hobbits. They both nearly beat one (1) troll, so that's comparable, but Pippin appears not to have got a single hit in against the orcs that captured them while Merry was cutting off hands like a boss. Pippin also straight-up tell Bergil that he's not a fighter Also there's a nonzero chance that Frodo will just straight up curse you (if the guilt of fighting Frodo isn't enough if a curse by itself) And, of course, if you try to fight Frodo, you will 100% end up fighting Sam, and he will wreck you (and you'll deserve it, you penny-anna Also: if you fight Frodo you'll have a very angry Sam & possibly also the entire Fellowship to deal with BUT if you fight Pippin they will probably cheer you on ainurs Bold of you to assume one could attempt to fight Pippin and NOT instantly be killed by Boromir feynites So here's the thing - you absolutely DO NOT want to try and fight Frodo or Pippin because they are going to be protected by the rest of the Fellowship which basically exists to stop asshole Big People from picking on the hobbits. Folk might talk a big game but when the chips are down, you are not going to lay a single hand on any of the hobbits. Either you'll find yourself immediately fighting all four of them or else you'll move to land your first hit and suddenly Aragorn will side-tackle you into the trees. And he probably hits like a freight train tbh. So here's what you do You fight Legolas. The thing about fist-fighting Legolas of course is that you will lose. This is not a fight you're gonna win no matter what. But Legolas has his standing competition with Gimili, so once the challenge is issued, he's not gonna let anyone else step in and fight you either. No one is liable to volunteer on his behalf, either, so you will only end up fighting the one member of the fellowship. If you are lucky he might also take his shirt off. Bonus! Anyway Legolas will mop the floor with you, but he's also already convinced you're weaker than him anyway because you're not an elf, so he's gonna go kind of easy on you And when you lose he will be all snide and superior about it, which means everyone in the fellowship is gonna sympathize with you, and Gimli will probably challenge him on your behalf afterwards, but here's the key thing You will have lost a fist-fight to an immortal warrior prince That's a way better loss to cop to than that time you tried to fistfight a pudgy gentlehobbit and got beaten to the point of unconsciousness by his gardener yeah? icescrabblerjerky okay so tolkien tumblr is fast becoming my fave tumblr community thank you thank you all you are the true fellowship here. Source:hobbit-hole #mmmmmmmmmmhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm 32,148 notes The Tolkien discourse is getting violent
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Clock, Countdown, and Energy: buying peaches is so stressful because you have to consume them so quickly... it's like the moment the cashier types in that number the alpha peach turns to its brothers in the bags and says "alright listen up boys, it's time to remember your training. i want to see immense bruising by sundown. i want to see you near inedible by sunrise. remember it is better to die a free man than to be eaten." you gotta wolf down all of your peaches at the check out counter while the trader joe's employees eagerly look at the Peach Consumption Countdown Clock and cheer you on. these peaches have sensors on them that can tell when they come into contact with human hands so they can begin their self-destruct sequence like you're in a spy movie and the peach just relayed a message to you about the whereabouts of jimmy hoffa's decayed remains je-suis-hetalia Jimmy Hoffa is likely dead m4ge this response carries so much chaotic cursed energy. jimmy hoffa was declared dead in 1982 after disappearing in 1975. he was born in 1913, meaning he would be the miraculous age of 105 today if he wasn't dead. "likely dead." the fact that it's a hetalia blog trying to tell me that he is likely dead. the fact that i specifically mention his decayed corpse in my post so there is literally no reason for someone to alert me that he is "likely" deceased. the fact that this hetalia blog is trying to tell this to me, a person who up until recently literally worked for the international brotherhood of teamsters as a person in charge of handling their historical records. i spent two years of my life answering phone calls from people asking me if i personally knew what happened to jimmy hoffa's body. ive spent a significantly longer amount of time trying to forget that hetalia exists. my entire career as a hetalia faceboolk roleplayer at the age of 11 just flashed through my eyes. i legitimately cannot express how much this response has effected me. ive been staring at it for7 minutes. i feel like ive entered the twilight zone je-suis-hetalia I don't ever remember writing that when did I write that m4ge everything about this is cursed peaches

peaches

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Being Alone, Bad, and Beautiful: I wanna know what goes through boy's mind when he's falling for a girl cravings: niicola: duhnialler: teenagurs: d-aisyflowers: vvolfme: myfacemylifemyrules: lukeisanostrich: live4somethingdie4nothing: virginiacountryboy: Haha it’s pretty simple really. Our mind goes from thinking we have logic to “joiealhrngerkdjshnvlkzjhdnsf”. It kind of sneaks up on you. You get to see her, and all of a sudden you find yourself wanting to see her more, and you’re not entirely too sure why. Just something about her makes you smile. You talk to her as much as you can. Or you at least try to anyways. But to be honest sometimes you find yourself at a loss for words. It’s because she’s gorgeous; you literally lose every thought in your mind. The only words you’re thinking are “wow…this girl…” and you WANT to tell her. But you know it’s not the right time, and you’re worried you’ll just scare her off. We think that for a number of reasons…you could have been hurt in the past by a guy and we don’t want to be associated with him by a stereotype, you could not be interested in us and think we’re creepy, the usual stuff. Anyways, as you talk to her more and more and time passes by. Days. Weeks. Months. However long it takes…you find your days strange if you don’t talk to her. She’s on your mind all the time. Everything from “man I wish she was here…” to “I can’t get over how beautiful her eyes are…I see them everytime I close mine…”. Then next thing you know you’re with her, and your heart starts racing as you begin to get shaky. You don’t want her to see your hand trembling, but in front of everybody you physically flirt a little to test the waters. And if she plays back you swallow everything and lightly go to take her hand. In front of every one. Your friends are cheering you on in their heads, but you can see it in their eyes. And then you look into hers just to see if she’s just as nervous as you are…..and at that point it’s fair to say you’ve fallen for a girl. Maybe not totally gone off the ledge, fallen in love. But she’s definitely going to be almost every thought you have. And every moment you’re not with her, you’re going to wish you were. And if you’re lucky enough to reach the point where she starts taking your hand first? Good luck son. Heart will be skipping beats. Pulse will be sky rocketing. Words may even stutter. I guess what I’m getting at is, a girl is kind of like an addiction. Not in a bad way (most the time). But once one catches your attention you can never get enough of her. You want more. You want to see her more. You want to hold her more. And above all else you want her to smile more…because all of those things, they give you a rush you just can’t replace.  Can I marry you?? well…he pretty much explained it ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ most amazing explanation i have ever read, forever alone lol REBLOGGING FOR WHAT’S WRITTEN UP THERE. WOW. AMEN. wow Wow Wow im fucking crying im crying
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Bad, Beautiful, and Country Boy: I wanna know what goes through boy's mind when he's falling for a girl ciggeret: puregems: luzure: virginiacountryboy: Haha it’s pretty simple really. Our mind goes from thinking we have logic to “joiealhrngerkdjshnvlkzjhdnsf”. It kind of sneaks up on you. You get to see her, and all of a sudden you find yourself wanting to see her more, and you’re not entirely too sure why. Just something about her makes you smile. You talk to her as much as you can. Or you at least try to anyways. But to be honest sometimes you find yourself at a loss for words. It’s because she’s gorgeous; you literally lose every thought in your mind. The only words you’re thinking are “wow…this girl…” and you WANT to tell her. But you know it’s not the right time, and you’re worried you’ll just scare her off. We think that for a number of reasons…you could have been hurt in the past by a guy and we don’t want to be associated with him by a stereotype, you could not be interested in us and think we’re creepy, the usual stuff. Anyways, as you talk to her more and more and time passes by. Days. Weeks. Months. However long it takes…you find your days strange if you don’t talk to her. She’s on your mind all the time. Everything from “man I wish she was here…” to “I can’t get over how beautiful her eyes are…I see them everytime I close mine…”. Then next thing you know you’re with her, and your heart starts racing as you begin to get shaky. You don’t want her to see your hand trembling, but in front of everybody you physically flirt a little to test the waters. And if she plays back you swallow everything and lightly go to take her hand. In front of every one. Your friends are cheering you on in their heads, but you can see it in their eyes. And then you look into hers just to see if she’s just as nervous as you are…..and at that point it’s fair to say you’ve fallen for a girl. Maybe not totally gone off the ledge, fallen in love. But she’s definitely going to be almost every thought you have. And every moment you’re not with her, you’re going to wish you were. And if you’re lucky enough to reach the point where she starts taking your hand first? Good luck son. Heart will be skipping beats. Pulse will be sky rocketing. Words may even stutter. I guess what I’m getting at is, a girl is kind of like an addiction. Not in a bad way (most the time). But once one catches your attention you can never get enough of her. You want more. You want to see her more. You want to hold her more. And above all else you want her to smile more…because all of those things, they give you a rush you just can’t replace. WOW THIS ^ ^^ aw omg, wow just wow ^^ so much respect for you, virginia country boy :)

ciggeret: puregems: luzure: virginiacountryboy: Haha it’s pretty simple really. Our mind goes from thinking we have logic to “joiealhrng...

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Bad, Beautiful, and Creepy: I wanna know what goes through boy's mind when he's falling for a girl virginiacountryboy: Haha it’s pretty simple really. Our mind goes from thinking we have logic to “joiealhrngerkdjshnvlkzjhdnsf”. It kind of sneaks up on you. You get to see her, and all of a sudden you find yourself wanting to see her more, and you’re not entirely too sure why. Just something about her makes you smile. You talk to her as much as you can. Or you at least try to anyways. But to be honest sometimes you find yourself at a loss for words. It’s because she’s gorgeous; you literally lose every thought in your mind. The only words you’re thinking are “wow…this girl…” and you WANT to tell her. But you know it’s not the right time, and you’re worried you’ll just scare her off. We think that for a number of reasons…you could have been hurt in the past by a guy and we don’t want to be associated with him by a stereotype, you could not be interested in us and think we’re creepy, the usual stuff. Anyways, as you talk to her more and more and time passes by. Days. Weeks. Months. However long it takes…you find your days strange if you don’t talk to her. She’s on your mind all the time. Everything from “man I wish she was here…” to “I can’t get over how beautiful her eyes are…I see them everytime I close mine…”. Then next thing you know you’re with her, and your heart starts racing as you begin to get shaky. You don’t want her to see your hand trembling, but in front of everybody you physically flirt a little to test the waters. And if she plays back you swallow everything and lightly go to take her hand. In front of every one. Your friends are cheering you on in their heads, but you can see it in their eyes. And then you look into hers just to see if she’s just as nervous as you are…..and at that point it’s fair to say you’ve fallen for a girl. Maybe not totally gone off the ledge, fallen in love. But she’s definitely going to be almost every thought you have. And every moment you’re not with her, you’re going to wish you were. And if you’re lucky enough to reach the point where she starts taking your hand first? Good luck son. Heart will be skipping beats. Pulse will be sky rocketing. Words may even stutter. I guess what I’m getting at is, a girl is kind of like an addiction. Not in a bad way (most the time). But once one catches your attention you can never get enough of her. You want more. You want to see her more. You want to hold her more. And above all else you want her to smile more…because all of those things, they give you a rush you just can’t replace.

virginiacountryboy: Haha it’s pretty simple really. Our mind goes from thinking we have logic to “joiealhrngerkdjshnvlkzjhdnsf”. It kind of...

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