Consisted
Consisted

Consisted

Relationship Statuses
Relationship Statuses

Relationship Statuses

foreveralone
 foreveralone

foreveralone

too
too

too

fastly
fastly

fastly

rhetorical question
rhetorical question

rhetorical question

redundancy
redundancy

redundancy

loyalty
loyalty

loyalty

consistent
consistent

consistent

yours
yours

yours

๐Ÿ”ฅ Popular | Latest

Aww, Bad, and Bless Up: r/aww u/bad_girlz ld imgur 150 Pound French Mastiff gets a kiss from a 6 pound Chihuahua Yesterday I discussed the poor hygiene of some of my brothers out here whose PPs is uncut. One of my followers had this to say: โ€œI went to a dude's place for a wake up call and he knew I was coming. Pulled that skin back, and there was literally sh!t the consistency of- *BAM*. The smell hit and I started heaving and had to run to the bathroom. He had the nerve to try to clean himself, but the smell was either permeating his room or stuck in my nostrils\lungs\long-term memory. He took me to Olive Garden (because pasta and breadsticks usually makes me forget everything), but I saw some white sauce and started heaving at the table. Like, the drools started bruh. I think it was literally the last time we attempted $ex and our fvckship ended soon after. He's somewhere with no job and live with a brother at 41 years of age. His life could have been worth more if he cleaned himself that morning.โ€ Ok. Hol up. Lemme just...lemme catch my breath...and...lemme...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHA FVCK. ๐Ÿ˜‚ NAW. NAW NAW NAW ๐Ÿ˜‚. As basic Caucasian women say: โ€œliterally deadโ€. As the big homie Popiando would say, โ€œdeadass b. The Deadest of Asses.โ€ I read this and my soul exited my body. Literally I exhaled my last breath and my soul said โ€œbish Iโ€™m meeting God nowโ€ and my soul got to the gates of Heaven and Gabriel saidโ€œWHO IS YOUR LORD!โ€ and I tried to say โ€œthere is no deity except Godโ€ and instead I opened my mouth and said โ€œthe ting goes SCREEEE RA PAT PAT PAT PAK CAC CAโ€ and Gabriel flung me into Hell Bruh. Deceased. Letโ€™s recount: (1) PP smelled like a Funeral Home and Crematorium for roadkill skunks. (2) Even the finest of middle class fancy dinners could not repair the damage. (3) After this incident, his entire life crumbled and he is now not only stinky but homeless, depressed, unemployed and desperate. Iโ€™m still dead. I still havenโ€™t recovered. Yโ€™all out here stroking my ego saying Iโ€™m funny...THIS IS THE FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER READ. MEN: DOVE SOAP. WARM WATER. YALL OUT HERE ALTERING THE ENTIRE TRAJECTORY OF YA LIFE OFF YA PP SMELL. SHOWER NOW BEFORE ITโ€™S TOO LATE. YALL BEEN WARNED ๐Ÿค— (credit the genius @tamashar - Big Sis! U murdered me ๐Ÿ˜‚ bless up ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚)
Ass, Dude, and Family: Dear F*CK Boy, F*CK You @balleralert "No, i'm not ready for a relationship but i want you to wait for me and not cheat on me while i fuck other girls." Read more: www.balleralert.comm Dear F*CK Boy, F*CK You Dear F*CK Boy, โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € F*ck you, your "ain't sh*t" father, your whore of a mother, and the rest of the bum bitches in your family. I would say something about your pissy grandmother, but she makes a mean buttermilk pie and although she has Alzheimer's, she remembers me. Anyway, it amazes me that you intentionally seek good women for the sole purpose of f*cking them over. You never get a b*tch that's full of shhh like you, do you? It's too much like you, right? โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € Oh, how I want to go in your grill and reconfigure your smile. I can not fathom a more gratifying action. Even though I'm beyond angry, resoundingly the blame rests on me. I allowed you to f*ck me over. I pretended to not see the signs, excusing your behavior as nothing when it was everything. I believed you after I caught you in the first lie. I bought the wolf and then turned around and gave you the currency to invest in the dream. โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € Yes, I am beyond angry, and while I would like to either carry your ass on my taxes for next year or be reimbursed, I must thank you for the experience. You taught me so many valuable lessons like don't trust a man's mouth or his actions. Trust his consistency. Every dude doesn't deserve all of me. As much as I would like to help and make life easier, you're a man. Figure the shhh out. My job isn't to hold you down or ensure you're good. Thanks to you, I know that the "cousin" is really a side chick you've been smashing. I have to be careful with the term "friend" and that a hungry whore will do anything... to read more log onto BallerAlert.com (clickable link in profile)