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rubitrightintomyeyes: theonion: Rock Apparently Factors Into Girlfriend’s Shower Routine SEATTLE—Saying he was confused about the full extent of its purpose as well as its overall benefit, local man Jacob Ferris, 25, nonetheless surmised today that the oblong rock located in girlfriend Sarah Milstein’s shower caddy must somehow factor into her bathing routine, sources confirmed. “I guess at some point while she’s showering, she rubs a rock on her body,” said Ferris, expressing what he claimed was “the only possible conclusion” about the light-gray rock in his girlfriend’s bathroom. “I mean, it looks sort of nice, so she could just have it there for decoration or something. But it’s usually right near all the other soaps and her loofah, so I think it’s probably something she actually uses while under the water.” “I really don’t know how it all works,” Ferris added. “All I know is that in between Sarah getting into the shower and getting out, there’s a rock involved.” Ferris, who said he was unable to determine exactly when in the showering process the rock first comes into play, told reporters he is equally clueless about what part of the body the rock is used on. In addition, Ferris said he occasionally inspects the roughly 3-ounce object when he’s in Milstein’s shower, and told reporters that the rock is nearly always wet and is occasionally moved to slightly different spots within the bathtub, leading him to believe that his girlfriend uses it fairly regularly. He also noted his girlfriend’s bathing time never seems particularly longer than the average person’s considering she has added a rock into the mix. Ferris added that all attempts to incorporate the rock into his own shower routine have ultimately been unsuccessful. “I tried rubbing it on my skin once, and it hurt,” Ferris said, concluding that pouring soap and water directly onto the rock neither made it softer nor easier on his skin. “I could maybe see how it could get some dirt off of your body, but it seems too painful to work. Her skin usually looks nice though, so maybe I’m wrong.” “There is a chance it could be a hair thing,” Ferris continued. “Maybe she rubs the rock in her hair? I don’t know.” Ferris confirmed he has considered numerous reasons for why his girlfriend uses the rock in the shower, including that she has some type of skin condition, that the rock is some sort of weird tradition her family has, or that everyone uses rocks in the shower and he has been out of the loop the entire time. “It could be for cleaning the bathtub,” said Ferris, adding he once suspected the rock was a device for making the bathroom smell nice, but then noticed it had no discernible smell whatsoever. “Like every few weekends she scrubs the tub with this rock? I guess I could see Sarah doing that.” While Ferris said he is mostly certain that the rock was initially purchased at a home goods store of some kind, he was not able to completely rule out the possibility it was just a rock that his girlfriend found on the ground and decided to put in her shower. “I wonder if I should put a rock in my shower for when she’s over here,” said Ferris, who said he once tried to locate a rock at a Bed Bath & Beyond, but left after not wanting to walk up to a sales clerk and ask them where they kept their “shower rocks.” “Or I could just tell her to leave a rock at my place if she wants.” “I’m probably not going to do that,” Ferris added. At press time, a visibly perplexed Ferris had seen the rock sitting in Milstein’s trashcan and then looked in the shower to see another rock sitting in its place. : rubitrightintomyeyes: theonion: Rock Apparently Factors Into Girlfriend’s Shower Routine SEATTLE—Saying he was confused about the full extent of its purpose as well as its overall benefit, local man Jacob Ferris, 25, nonetheless surmised today that the oblong rock located in girlfriend Sarah Milstein’s shower caddy must somehow factor into her bathing routine, sources confirmed. “I guess at some point while she’s showering, she rubs a rock on her body,” said Ferris, expressing what he claimed was “the only possible conclusion” about the light-gray rock in his girlfriend’s bathroom. “I mean, it looks sort of nice, so she could just have it there for decoration or something. But it’s usually right near all the other soaps and her loofah, so I think it’s probably something she actually uses while under the water.” “I really don’t know how it all works,” Ferris added. “All I know is that in between Sarah getting into the shower and getting out, there’s a rock involved.” Ferris, who said he was unable to determine exactly when in the showering process the rock first comes into play, told reporters he is equally clueless about what part of the body the rock is used on. In addition, Ferris said he occasionally inspects the roughly 3-ounce object when he’s in Milstein’s shower, and told reporters that the rock is nearly always wet and is occasionally moved to slightly different spots within the bathtub, leading him to believe that his girlfriend uses it fairly regularly. He also noted his girlfriend’s bathing time never seems particularly longer than the average person’s considering she has added a rock into the mix. Ferris added that all attempts to incorporate the rock into his own shower routine have ultimately been unsuccessful. “I tried rubbing it on my skin once, and it hurt,” Ferris said, concluding that pouring soap and water directly onto the rock neither made it softer nor easier on his skin. “I could maybe see how it could get some dirt off of your body, but it seems too painful to work. Her skin usually looks nice though, so maybe I’m wrong.” “There is a chance it could be a hair thing,” Ferris continued. “Maybe she rubs the rock in her hair? I don’t know.” Ferris confirmed he has considered numerous reasons for why his girlfriend uses the rock in the shower, including that she has some type of skin condition, that the rock is some sort of weird tradition her family has, or that everyone uses rocks in the shower and he has been out of the loop the entire time. “It could be for cleaning the bathtub,” said Ferris, adding he once suspected the rock was a device for making the bathroom smell nice, but then noticed it had no discernible smell whatsoever. “Like every few weekends she scrubs the tub with this rock? I guess I could see Sarah doing that.” While Ferris said he is mostly certain that the rock was initially purchased at a home goods store of some kind, he was not able to completely rule out the possibility it was just a rock that his girlfriend found on the ground and decided to put in her shower. “I wonder if I should put a rock in my shower for when she’s over here,” said Ferris, who said he once tried to locate a rock at a Bed Bath & Beyond, but left after not wanting to walk up to a sales clerk and ask them where they kept their “shower rocks.” “Or I could just tell her to leave a rock at my place if she wants.” “I’m probably not going to do that,” Ferris added. At press time, a visibly perplexed Ferris had seen the rock sitting in Milstein’s trashcan and then looked in the shower to see another rock sitting in its place.

rubitrightintomyeyes: theonion: Rock Apparently Factors Into Girlfriend’s Shower Routine SEATTLE—Saying he was confused about the full...

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filibusterfrog:dwarven hair customs: Dwarven Hair Customs Much Like Orcs and Elves, Dwarves have many rules and customs in regards to their hair. Unlike Elves, who believe the act of cutting their hair is shameful, or Orcs who only maintain their hair until battle (an orcish answer to throwing down the gauntlet), a Dwarf will cut or restyle their hair at certain turning points during their life, such as reaching adulthood, marriage, a major victory loss (but not limited to) or on the battlefield, and death. Youth (50 and below) Simple, Free Ribbons -Beard hasn't come in fully No beads -No braids Usually or in a ponytail are popular with the kids worn loose Adulthood (51-200) (loose) Braids allowed Hair is very long if unmarried Beads can be earned -Improper entírely loose at this point ín life to wear hair AURUstETFe Old Age (200+ -Worn up, if long enough if short, ribbons, horsehair, wool, will be used to emulate longer hair etc Important note: the hair of a dwarf can be cut, but the beard gets left alone. Every dwarf grows a beard. If a dwarfling's beard hasnt come in by the time theyre 51, they remain a dwarfling until they grow one <Marriage Anewly married dwarf will cut off their hair in the back to signify commitment. Couples are disallowed from dívorce until both parties have regrown their hair to their shoulders (usually about 2 months). A married dwarf will cap their braids. 00 Victory This celebratory haircstyle is characterised by excessive decoration and braids, to be worn for 2 weeks, upon which the dwarf will add another bead to their everyday attire. < Battlefield Loss/Death of Loved One a Signified by an entirely clipped head of hair, when'a major loss is suffered in life, it's unlucky giving up some of your pride. not to pay it due respect by Death and Burial> A dwarf passingov must have their hair covered so that no beasts or demons see their life experiences. They to be allowed before the gods over into the afterlife on the journey may are said to uncover themselves AubuSE2fe filibusterfrog:dwarven hair customs

filibusterfrog:dwarven hair customs

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26+ Smashing Tumblr Posts That Are Not To Be Missed #funny #lol #memes #humor #tumblr: 26+ Smashing Tumblr Posts That Are Not To Be Missed biggest-gaudiest-patronuses seduce me with ridiculous history facts chrownox Pineapples used to be so expensive that people would rent them for partys as prestige decoration biggest-gaudiest-patronuses that's the shit goldengaypotato Upwards of 90% of all giraffe sex is homosexual, with some males even developing intimate relationships that include fawning and cuddling with their necks. biggest-gaudiest-patronuses my first thought was "this can't possibly be based on fact" and then Giraffes Further information: Giraffe § Social life and breeding habits Male giraffes have been observed to engage in remarkably high frequen ci es of homosexual behavior. After aggressive "necking", it is common for two male giraffes to caress and court each other, leading up to mounting and climax. Such interactons between males have been found to be more frequent than heterosexual coup ling [79] In one study, up to 94% of observed mounting inciden ts took pla ce between two males. The proportion of same sex activities varied between 30 and 75%, and atany given time one in twenty males were engaged in non-combative necking behavior with another male. Only 1% of same-sex moun ting inciden ts occurred between females leol biggest-gaudiest-patronuses this has nothing to do with history unclefather Historically, giraffes are gay Source:biggest-gaudiest-patronuses #welp 47,652 notes Sarcasm Goal Click to see full list 26+ Smashing Tumblr Posts That Are Not To Be Missed #funny #lol #memes #humor #tumblr
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katy-133: katy-133: srebrnafh: fuckyeahgoodomens: The only wall decoration was a framed drawing—the cartoon for the Mona Lisa, Leonardo da Vinci’s original sketch. Crowley had bought it from the artist one hot afternoon in Florence, and felt it was superior to the final painting.* *Leonardo had felt so too. “I got her bloody smile right in the roughs,” he told Crowley’ sipping cold wine in the lunchtime sun, “but it went all over the place when I painted it. Her husband had a few things to say about it when I delivered it, but, like I tell him, Signor del Giocondo, apart from you, who’s going to see it? Anyway … explain this helicopter thing again, will you?” Oh, wow. Neil released some sharper images on his Tumblr: Fun trivia: This illustration was done by Paul Kidby, whom you may know from his illustrations for the Discword series. He’s also providing the artwork for the upcoming illustrated edition of the Good Omens novel. This is unrelated to my last reblog, but I just want to add: I really, really relate to Leonardo during that bit: tfw you draw a better rough sketch than the lineart.  oTL : 효 prime video katy-133: katy-133: srebrnafh: fuckyeahgoodomens: The only wall decoration was a framed drawing—the cartoon for the Mona Lisa, Leonardo da Vinci’s original sketch. Crowley had bought it from the artist one hot afternoon in Florence, and felt it was superior to the final painting.* *Leonardo had felt so too. “I got her bloody smile right in the roughs,” he told Crowley’ sipping cold wine in the lunchtime sun, “but it went all over the place when I painted it. Her husband had a few things to say about it when I delivered it, but, like I tell him, Signor del Giocondo, apart from you, who’s going to see it? Anyway … explain this helicopter thing again, will you?” Oh, wow. Neil released some sharper images on his Tumblr: Fun trivia: This illustration was done by Paul Kidby, whom you may know from his illustrations for the Discword series. He’s also providing the artwork for the upcoming illustrated edition of the Good Omens novel. This is unrelated to my last reblog, but I just want to add: I really, really relate to Leonardo during that bit: tfw you draw a better rough sketch than the lineart.  oTL
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