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TBT - SSG Corey Calkins Ladies and gentlemen, gather round the campfire as we light up your field day celebrations with a celebration of our own. That’s right, it’s time to throw this thing back to February 2010. A simpler time, a time before David Petraeus locked his knees at a senate hearing, and back when you could still tinkle on dead Taliban. omgtakemebackkkk⠀ ⠀ Today we’re talking about every Marine from 6th Reggie’s favorite little town in Afghanistan’s Helmand Province. marjahmarjahmarjah⠀ ⠀ What many of you may not know, however, is that them Gyrenes weren’t the only ones with their dicks in the dirt giving Terry the ol’ whatfor. Case in point, the subject of today’s OAF TBT; Staff Sgt Corey Calkins aka CashMoneyCorey⠀ ⠀ While serving as a weapons sergeant for ODA 3121, Cake Crushin’ Calkins was part of the coalition push through Marjah. On 18 February 2010, he led an assault of ANA troops against a platoon-sized element of Taliban fuckbois at a key intersection near the bazaar in Marjah. While under intense small arms, RPG, and mortar fire, Corey the Cockslapper charged the enemy position like a robust lesbian hopped up on Jack Daniels in a domestic dispute; inspiring his ANA troops to follow and overwhelm the Taliban position. TakeTheirShoes⠀ ⠀ After locking down the intersection and surrounding positions, Corey continued to fuck Terry six ways to Sunday by voluntarily continuing to drive the man-titty-havin’ soyboys out of smalls arms and RPG range so three critically wounded Marines could be evacuated. He aggressively pursued the enemy hotter than the homies in Tekashi 69’s cell block are pursuing his butthole. LemmeTugOnYoDickALilWhile⠀ ⠀ For his actions that day, SSG Calkins was awarded the Distinguished Service Cross and earned himself a lifetime supply of bummed cigs, fat pinches of dip, and near-beers from every Marine in the Ghan. ThereGoesMyHero ⠀ ⠀: TBT - SSG Corey Calkins Ladies and gentlemen, gather round the campfire as we light up your field day celebrations with a celebration of our own. That’s right, it’s time to throw this thing back to February 2010. A simpler time, a time before David Petraeus locked his knees at a senate hearing, and back when you could still tinkle on dead Taliban. omgtakemebackkkk⠀ ⠀ Today we’re talking about every Marine from 6th Reggie’s favorite little town in Afghanistan’s Helmand Province. marjahmarjahmarjah⠀ ⠀ What many of you may not know, however, is that them Gyrenes weren’t the only ones with their dicks in the dirt giving Terry the ol’ whatfor. Case in point, the subject of today’s OAF TBT; Staff Sgt Corey Calkins aka CashMoneyCorey⠀ ⠀ While serving as a weapons sergeant for ODA 3121, Cake Crushin’ Calkins was part of the coalition push through Marjah. On 18 February 2010, he led an assault of ANA troops against a platoon-sized element of Taliban fuckbois at a key intersection near the bazaar in Marjah. While under intense small arms, RPG, and mortar fire, Corey the Cockslapper charged the enemy position like a robust lesbian hopped up on Jack Daniels in a domestic dispute; inspiring his ANA troops to follow and overwhelm the Taliban position. TakeTheirShoes⠀ ⠀ After locking down the intersection and surrounding positions, Corey continued to fuck Terry six ways to Sunday by voluntarily continuing to drive the man-titty-havin’ soyboys out of smalls arms and RPG range so three critically wounded Marines could be evacuated. He aggressively pursued the enemy hotter than the homies in Tekashi 69’s cell block are pursuing his butthole. LemmeTugOnYoDickALilWhile⠀ ⠀ For his actions that day, SSG Calkins was awarded the Distinguished Service Cross and earned himself a lifetime supply of bummed cigs, fat pinches of dip, and near-beers from every Marine in the Ghan. ThereGoesMyHero ⠀ ⠀
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U ladies who wanna start kissing me and bite my lower lip - hard - like it's a Sour Patch Kid? Y'all savage lol. Where did this come from. Who taught u this. Who is this man walking around telling you to chew on my bottom lip. Baby girl I got work tomorrow, damn 😂. You gon make me walk in looking like I got a sore, people finna be like "aye since when smash got the Herpè, wow, he a dirty birdy (apparently)..." Another thing is scratching. One girl clawed my back so damn hard Bruh it bled thru my white dress shirt, shit looked like I copulated with wolverine. My Chinese dry cleaning lady - who treat me like a son and give me shit every time I gotta explain my stains - Bruh she had a field day: "I SEE SOMEBODY HAVE GOOD WEEK END. I CHARGE YOU EXTRA TWO DOLLA FOR BLOOD STAIN. NOT READY UNTIL MONGDAY. NOW YOU GO. FIND GOOD GIRL, NOT ATTACK YOU TRY TO KILL YOU 😂." Now look, I like it when y'all wanna be a lil rough back. My body can take the physical ass whuppin. All I'm saying is warn a brother 🤗. Ya get me! Bless up 😍😂😂😂: Nom? @DrSmashlove U ladies who wanna start kissing me and bite my lower lip - hard - like it's a Sour Patch Kid? Y'all savage lol. Where did this come from. Who taught u this. Who is this man walking around telling you to chew on my bottom lip. Baby girl I got work tomorrow, damn 😂. You gon make me walk in looking like I got a sore, people finna be like "aye since when smash got the Herpè, wow, he a dirty birdy (apparently)..." Another thing is scratching. One girl clawed my back so damn hard Bruh it bled thru my white dress shirt, shit looked like I copulated with wolverine. My Chinese dry cleaning lady - who treat me like a son and give me shit every time I gotta explain my stains - Bruh she had a field day: "I SEE SOMEBODY HAVE GOOD WEEK END. I CHARGE YOU EXTRA TWO DOLLA FOR BLOOD STAIN. NOT READY UNTIL MONGDAY. NOW YOU GO. FIND GOOD GIRL, NOT ATTACK YOU TRY TO KILL YOU 😂." Now look, I like it when y'all wanna be a lil rough back. My body can take the physical ass whuppin. All I'm saying is warn a brother 🤗. Ya get me! Bless up 😍😂😂😂
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100th day of schoolomg-humor.tumblr.com: deelaundry: danielkanhai: i was cleaning my room at home and i found a box my mom kept full of all my school work from when i was little. one of the things in there was this list from kindergarten. on the 100th day of school we did all these "100" themed activities and one of them was finishing the sentence, "i wish i had 100." let me tell you, a genie would have a field day with all the vague wishes we came up with. like little kids probably wish the most as an age group and yet they all suck at it. like, okay, katie wished for 100 dollars, right? but then sam comes in and she wished for 100 toonies. that's 200 dollars! katie looks like a god damn idiot! but hold on because then jonathan wished for 100 monies, like, plural of money. so he wished for 100 different kinds of currency in any amount. that could be one american penny and then 99 penny equivalents or millions of dollars in euros and pounds and stuff. stil1, strange wish to leave open to interpretation. shit keane, now keane had a more sensible take on the money wish. keane wished for 100 pieces of gold. a timeless metal coveted by ancient and modern cultures alike. clearly he knew somethir didn't. what else did people wish for? ronald wished for 100 toys. shannon, i shit you not, shannon wished for 100 "boxes to put my toys in." ronald was basically wishing just to get on shannon's level while she was just like, "give me a gift card to the container store." looking through the list there's lot of weird one upping. like a lot of weird passive aggressive stuff. katie b wished for 100 dresses, melanie countered with 100 fancy dresses. like she wanted dresses too, but had to clarify just to make katie b feel like she had shit taste. me, i wished for 100, get this, cats. you could not pay me to take a cat today, i want nothing to do with cats. apparently in kindergarten i wanted an insane, borderline illegal number of them. i have a feeling i was making this wish to impress someone else, like you know when you pretended to like a band in high school to have something in common with your crush? this was like that only magic and more. allergenic. my friend connor wished for 100 kitty cats. little baby cats. kind of a dick move, right? like you know i'd end up with 100 weird old cats, 179 eyes between them, all deathbeds. andre wanted 100 cars at what, age 5? he wanted to their a used dealership and needed inventory. joanne wanted 100 presents, which is different than wanting 100 of something more specific. like a present is a personal thing someone gives to someone else. she basically wanted people to think of her and get her something nice. i wish i could track everyone down and do an updated list. oh man, you know what i'd say if someone wished for 100 kitty cats? i'd wish for 100 pregnant cats. that's like 200-700 cats or something. dammit connor where are you. I cannot stop laughing. 100th day of schoolomg-humor.tumblr.com
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<p><strong>Humor against terrorism.</strong> An open letter to Trey Parker and Matt Stone from a Norwegian citizen - an appeal to use comedy against terrorism. Brilliant.</p>: An open letter to Trey Parker and Matt Stone Dear Mr. Parker and Mr. Stone. I'm writing this letter in hope that it will reach you My name is David, and I'm a Norwegian cartoonist and writer. I've always believed comedy to be our greatest weapon, and in that respect, you are the guys with the biggest guns Our nation was attacked from within by a cowardly terrorist, who simultaneously released a 1500 page manifesto, wherein he sees himself as a crusader, a Knights Templar. The media are currently having a field day, executing the next step in his plan: bringing attention to his sick, hateful and weakly reflected ideas, amongst them war against Islam and attacks on civilians. His manifesto is being read across the world, his video has countless viewers, and the media coverage is accompanied by photoshopped pictures he himself released, showing him the way he wants to be perceived This man must not be allowed to be an icon. The state of Norway will not allow him to be a martyr. He will grow old in prison, and he will never see his civil war unfold. His vision needs to be ridiculed, then forgotten We are a wealthy nation. The structural damage will be repaired in no time. I believe we have the best possible means of treatment for the survivors, both mentally and physically so in the way of resources there is little that can be done for us except for the overwhelming moral support we ve recieved from abroad. Im moved to tears by the way our state leaders, the media and the people have reacted to these horrible events. The sense of unity and love is heartwarming It is however my greatest wish that you guys could do what you can do so brilliantly. Poke right through his ideas, his hatred and his attempts at iconization, with the massive and non-leathal force that is your comedy Help us defuse hinm <p><strong>Humor against terrorism.</strong> An open letter to Trey Parker and Matt Stone from a Norwegian citizen - an appeal to use comedy against terrorism. Brilliant.</p>

<p><strong>Humor against terrorism.</strong> An open letter to Trey Parker and Matt Stone from a Norwegian citizen - an appeal to use com...

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