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Club, Tumblr, and Blog: laughoutloud-club: This rip in a leather sofa looks like a boat floating in the open sea

laughoutloud-club: This rip in a leather sofa looks like a boat floating in the open sea

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Ash, Bad, and Chill: Sat, Jun 22, 18:36 Hello traveller, I am your guide. Are you ready to begin your quest? Hello stranger, what do I need to do, to complete your request. You have to recover a long time lost manuscript held by a famous necromancer. Your journey begins in a forest. The left of you is a mountain with a large boulder blocking it's entrance, in front of you is an ancient graveyard. Some of the greatest heroes of the realm rest there I would like to investigate the grave- yard of it looks chill or haunted. Not strong enough to push that boulder As you enter the graveyard you notice old tombstones crumbling, scribed in language too ancient to be known by any living creature. While searching around you find a crypt, the front door has been knocked open, you can hear a soft gust of wind coming from inside. I copy the ancient text, best as possible. I use 'produce flame' when I enter the crypt. As you go in the light from your spell fills the room, you notice the coffins that adorn the walls and a spiral staircase that leads further down, at the bottom of it lies a large room, broken pillars, and a statue of Sild, the Warlock. A very powerful wizard from centuries past. Further away, with barely any light around it, you see a creature in a black robe facing away, as it ignores you on purpouse. There's a corpse on an alter in front of it, and it's hands deep inside it As I enter the room I go "excuuuuuse me, but it's not nice to sacrifice people" en hold my flame ready to attack if he would attack me... The creature in black turns annoyed by your interference, you see a beetle crawl out of it's eye socket, it's deformed face makes your stomach sick, as you think that eating all those fries before entering a graveyard was a bad idea. A purple light starts forming as he moves his hands together With a quick look around you notice a large floating orb 3 meters above the creature's head. You remember the old legend of Sild's orb, which he used teleport anywhere in the world. Nasty! God damn it those fries! I shoot my flame to the orb so the bug guy can't escape. And pull out my scimitar ready to attack As your flame hits, the orb shatters into what seems to be glass spikes, flying everywhere, further damaging the room. Some hit the creature, tearing his black robes just to reveal pieces of rotting flesh. The stench of death takes over the room, you can't hold those fries anymore, as you make an effort to not puke onto your brand new heels -and you hear your own voice in your head WHY WOULD YOU GO INTO A GRAVEYARD USING HEELS WOMAN ? As you get distracted, the creature fires his spell, you quickly block it with your scimitar, but it flies away from your hand. You are disarmed and the creature starts running in your direction "I DON'T I WANTED SOMETHING DIFFERENT THEN THE USUAL SNEAKERS as I replied to my own question. I take them of hold them as a weapon ready to defend myself against the ugly bug dude. And try to figure out if I can back to my scimitar. As you dual-wield your brand new puke-free heels you notice a two fast moving shadows moving behind the creature. Desperation starts to hit as you are outnumbered and your scimitar is nowhere to be seen, suddenly the shadows jump onto the creatures head and start attacking him. IT'S YOUR FAMILIARS, your thank yourself for installing that catdoor years ago. The creature loses balance just as it reaches you, slipping and faceplanting your puddle fries and cola that rested on the floor. You plunge it's head with both heels. It explodes and the creature slowly starts turning into ashes... You give a well deserved pet to them. The comforting purring sounds fills the room, you feel safe now. One of your familiars starts digging into the ash pile, as he found something of value there. IT'S A FORTUNE COOKIE! I go like "Oooh cookie!" I break it open and eat the cookie while I read. And also keep petting them, like a good rub under the chin. You slowly chew the cookie, the slight chocolate taste is well welcome at this moment, unravel the note, and it says , hit me up for fries & movies sometime. Sept Her profile said she was into RPGs

Her profile said she was into RPGs

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Definitely, Lol, and Tumblr: saccharinerose: I made another edit for my She-Ra!Lonnie AU, this time from the Mystacor episode.I definitely wanted to add Rogelio here, floating in the water like a crocodile lol

saccharinerose: I made another edit for my She-Ra!Lonnie AU, this time from the Mystacor episode.I definitely wanted to add Rogelio here, f...

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Brains, Head, and Life: Have you ever had a job where you did nothing for years and nobody found out? Shayne Wyatt Answered Sep 22 Once worked at a steel company and there used to be this guy with a clipboard and pen who would continually be in the stock area checking labels, boxes, pallets, shipping packages. His name was Bob and everyone liked him, he was personable, was into sports, just an all round nice guy who got along with everyone staff, managers, bosses, everyone. Bob had been with the company all of 15 years by then, and you have to understand, this was a large steel mill with a couple thousand people working throughout the three mills on the same property. Anyway, at a managers meeting a decision was made to have an employee look after a certain area of finished nails, screws, nuts and bolts. They were scratching their head about who had the brains to handle it. One of the managers said, "Why not Bob?" Everyone knew right away who he was referring to and they all agreed he would probably be the best man for the job. The next question out of the manager's mouth was "Okay, which one of you guys does he work for?" And no one said a word, but looked around the table at the other managers. "C'mon, he's gotta work for someone here." The manager said, and still there was no answer. Someone piped up, "Maybe he works for one of the office managers." Long story short Bob worked at the plant for over 15 years, collecting a paycheck each and every week. For the first five years he worked in a department that became obsolete and so people were moved around to other areas of the mill, except for Bob. He got lost in the shuffle and found himself floating here and there without supervision or anyone ever paying attention to him. He waited to see if he would still get a paycheck and when that happened he thought at the time, "Well, I wonder how long I can get away with this before someone notices?" How about 10 years folks of weekly paychecks coming in without ever having had to work a day in his life. When this came out it was the talk of the whole operations and even reached the president of the company who could only laugh at the whole situation. Nonetheless Bob was let go, but HR told them they had to offer him a good severance package because he was an employee after all for the full 15 years he was there, and it was not his fault he had nothing to do. Management should have caught it in the beginning. I'm 75 now and this happened when I was still a young man, and had pretty much forgotten about it all until I read the question and I could not hold back a big silly grin about a wonderfully silly memory of Bob. Thanks for the memory Shayne
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Confused, Life, and Radio: l Seven Astronauts describe what it feels like to be in space.. Charles Duke Imagine your body as a potato. Now, imagine no gravity acting on that potato, and bingo: That's what space feels like. Eugene Cernan It's so inspiring to see the entire globe shimmering below you and realize that this is where prog rock started. Bernard A. Harris Jr. The best part was getting your picture taken while deadifting a 3,000-pound barbell. There's no gravity, so it's super easy to lift, but you still look really strong Eileen Collins I was looking forward to being weightless, but gravity still works for me in space. It kind of sucks seeing al the other astronauts floating around while I'm stuck orn the floor. Mae Jemison There are a bunch of extra continents you can only see from space. So far, I've counted 18 continents, but find more all the time Barry Wilmore You never know true beauty until you see Earth from space, or true terror untl you hear someone knocking on the space station door from outside. You look through the porthole and see an astronaut, but all your crew is inside and accounted for. You use the comm to ask who it is and he says he's Ramirez returning from a repair mission, but Ramirez is sitting right next to you n the command module and he's just as confused as you are. When you tell the guy this over the radio he starts banging on the door louder and harder, begging you to let him in, saying he's the real Ramirez Meanwhile, the Ramirez inside with you is pleading to keep the airlock shut. It realy puts life on Earth into Terry W. Virts There's no golf there epicjohndoe: It’s Like Your Body Is A Potato

epicjohndoe: It’s Like Your Body Is A Potato

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