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God, Oh My God, and Saw: supersugoiboi: violetohara: the-polyhedron: conquerorwurm: violetohara: violetohara: violetohara: violetohara: Tiny dirty stray kitten hanging out at the bottom of our stairs since yesterday. There are a lot of self-reliant ferals around our apartment, but this little thing was dirty covered in burrs. We gave it some chicken but couldn’t catch it. I think it may have wandered over from the outdoor cat hoarder colony down the street; that house is awful we saw kittens there last week. This morning the downstairs neighbor managed to grab it for us, and I put it on this cozy towel started combing and picking the burrs sticks out of its fur. It calmed down immediately and has been chilling here with me in the kitchen ever since. Got a vet appointment in an hour to get my little buddy cleaned up checked out. I hope it isn’t too sick; I think it might have a cold. If we can, we are probably going to keep her. What a difference a day makes! Took this little guy to the vet, got the fleas and dirt washed off him, got some antibiotics for a slight cold, but he is otherwise fine. Kneading and purring up a storm, eating a lot and being heart-crushingly adorable.  We have named this glorious creature Nux. A little over a month later and Nux is growing into a very long and floppy shoulder cat! Oh my god!!!! i’m so happy for this cat i hope nux knows im proud of him I just told him!

supersugoiboi: violetohara: the-polyhedron: conquerorwurm: violetohara: violetohara: violetohara: violetohara: Tiny dirty stray ...

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Computers, Money, and Police: @Michaeligr Wanted: Computer Hacker Hi I am Michael and I am pretty sure that the bakery across the street charged me for 8 croissants yesterday even thoughI only bought 7. To avenge this injustice, I need someone to help me hack into the bakery's computer and transfer the cost of a croissant from their account to mine. If you are good at technology, be outside the bakery at 5.18pm with a computer and we can carry out my plan. Here is what it will involve e We will be dressed as bakers so that people don't get suspicious (I will bring a spare baker's hat just in case you don't have your own) OIf anyone asks us what we're doing, just say, "We own a rival bakery called Full Speed Abread and we are just checking out the competition" I have memorised the Wikipedia page on bread so if they ask any detailed questions about bread, leave it to me If they ask any questions about bread that I can't answer, I will shout "RUN" That will be the signal that our cover has been blown and we need to get out of there If you do this job right and reimburse me for the croissant, I will see to it that you are rewarded. I will NOT pay you in money because that would leave a money trail that the police could use to track us down. However, since you are so interested in computers, I will pay you in floppy disks, like the one below. And don't worry, that's not the only floppy disk that will be coming your way. There are plenty more where that came from. Michael Re: Bakery Hack Hi. Michael again from the poster above. I have just remembered that I only have one baker's hat so you will need to bring your own. Hopefully this is not a problem. If it is, I could possibly borrow the protective headgear from my uncle's beekeeper's suit and you could wear that instead? h this is not ideal but it will have to do. Michael Wanted : Computer Hacker

Wanted : Computer Hacker

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Computers, Money, and Police: @Michaeligr Wanted: Computer Hacker Hi I am Michael and I am pretty sure that the bakery across the street charged me for 8 croissants yesterday even thoughI only bought 7. To avenge this injustice, I need someone to help me hack into the bakery's computer and transfer the cost of a croissant from their account to mine. If you are good at technology, be outside the bakery at 5.18pm with a computer and we can carry out my plan. Here is what it will involve e We will be dressed as bakers so that people don't get suspicious (I will bring a spare baker's hat just in case you don't have your own) OIf anyone asks us what we're doing, just say, "We own a rival bakery called Full Speed Abread and we are just checking out the competition" I have memorised the Wikipedia page on bread so if they ask any detailed questions about bread, leave it to me If they ask any questions about bread that I can't answer, I will shout "RUN" That will be the signal that our cover has been blown and we need to get out of there If you do this job right and reimburse me for the croissant, I will see to it that you are rewarded. I will NOT pay you in money because that would leave a money trail that the police could use to track us down. However, since you are so interested in computers, I will pay you in floppy disks, like the one below. And don't worry, that's not the only floppy disk that will be coming your way. There are plenty more where that came from. Michael Re: Bakery Hack Hi. Michael again from the poster above. I have just remembered that I only have one baker's hat so you will need to bring your own. Hopefully this is not a problem. If it is, I could possibly borrow the protective headgear from my uncle's beekeeper's suit and you could wear that instead? h this is not ideal but it will have to do. Michael Help me hack a bakery

Help me hack a bakery

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Computers, Money, and Police: @Michaeligr Wanted: Computer Hacker Hi I am Michael and I am pretty sure that the bakery across the street charged me for 8 croissants yesterday even thoughI only bought 7. To avenge this injustice, I need someone to help me hack into the bakery's computer and transfer the cost of a croissant from their account to mine. If you are good at technology, be outside the bakery at 5.18pm with a computer and we can carry out my plan. Here is what it will involve e We will be dressed as bakers so that people don't get suspicious (I will bring a spare baker's hat just in case you don't have your own) OIf anyone asks us what we're doing, just say, "We own a rival bakery called Full Speed Abread and we are just checking out the competition" I have memorised the Wikipedia page on bread so if they ask any detailed questions about bread, leave it to me If they ask any questions about bread that I can't answer, I will shout "RUN" That will be the signal that our cover has been blown and we need to get out of there If you do this job right and reimburse me for the croissant, I will see to it that you are rewarded. I will NOT pay you in money because that would leave a money trail that the police could use to track us down. However, since you are so interested in computers, I will pay you in floppy disks, like the one below. And don't worry, that's not the only floppy disk that will be coming your way. There are plenty more where that came from. Michael Re: Bakery Hack Hi. Michael again from the poster above. I have just remembered that I only have one baker's hat so you will need to bring your own. Hopefully this is not a problem. If it is, I could possibly borrow the protective headgear from my uncle's beekeeper's suit and you could wear that instead? h this is not ideal but it will have to do. Michael Wanted : Computer Hacker

Wanted : Computer Hacker

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Computers, Money, and Police: @Michaeligr Wanted: Computer Hacker Hi I am Michael and I am pretty sure that the bakery across the street charged me for 8 croissants yesterday even thoughI only bought 7. To avenge this injustice, I need someone to help me hack into the bakery's computer and transfer the cost of a croissant from their account to mine. If you are good at technology, be outside the bakery at 5.18pm with a computer and we can carry out my plan. Here is what it will involve e We will be dressed as bakers so that people don't get suspicious (I will bring a spare baker's hat just in case you don't have your own) OIf anyone asks us what we're doing, just say, "We own a rival bakery called Full Speed Abread and we are just checking out the competition" I have memorised the Wikipedia page on bread so if they ask any detailed questions about bread, leave it to me If they ask any questions about bread that I can't answer, I will shout "RUN" That will be the signal that our cover has been blown and we need to get out of there If you do this job right and reimburse me for the croissant, I will see to it that you are rewarded. I will NOT pay you in money because that would leave a money trail that the police could use to track us down. However, since you are so interested in computers, I will pay you in floppy disks, like the one below. And don't worry, that's not the only floppy disk that will be coming your way. There are plenty more where that came from. Michael Re: Bakery Hack Hi. Michael again from the poster above. I have just remembered that I only have one baker's hat so you will need to bring your own. Hopefully this is not a problem. If it is, I could possibly borrow the protective headgear from my uncle's beekeeper's suit and you could wear that instead? h this is not ideal but it will have to do. Michael Wanted : Computer Hacker

Wanted : Computer Hacker

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Internet, Shit, and Target: The Morris Internet Worm source code This disk contains the complete source code of the Morns Intemner worm program. This tiny, 99-line program brought large pieces of the Itermet to a standstill on November 2nd, 1988 worm was the fint of many inrusive programs that use the Internet to spread superfluousspork: hotcommunist: dr-archeville: ayellowbirds: thefingerfuckingfemalefury: undergroundmonorail: cactiofficial: pyronoid-d: text-mode: The Morris worm or Internet worm of November 2, 1988 was one of the first computer worms distributed via the Internet. It was written by a student at Cornell University, Robert Tappan Morris, and launched on November 2, 1988 from MIT. It’s trapped on a floppy tho this is some dark shit it has been denied its purpose forever bound to this obsolete storage am i glad it’s in there and we’re out here people reading fantasy novels ask “why did the ancient ones seal the evil away for ten thousand years instead of just killing it” but then we go ahead and do this shit We have learned nothing from every fantasy novel ever O.O The best part, from the wiki article: “According to its creator, the Morris worm was not written to cause damage, but to gauge the size of the Internet.” It was intended to do good, but the programmer made a mistake and it got out of hand, becoming viral. R̴͓̮͈̞̿͐͛̏̒͂͊̾ͅE͉̝͍̹̣̺̿͗͟͝L̶͖̫͇͙̬ͬ͗͌͘E̻͔̳ͪͭ̑̔̉̉̑ͣ͝͝ͅẢ̲̳̝̗̮ͩS̼̮̠̦͍͈̳̝ͮ̌ͯͯ̌͆͗͠ͅEͦ̎̊͏̪͙̤̦͈̯̱͞͠ ̱̃ͥ̆̄M̛̝̘̺̥̙̱͚ͣ̋͊̚E̪̮͍̘̟̟͚͖͐ the year is 28AW (after worm) and still we suffer Oh, w o r m
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Computers, Money, and Police: @Michaeli99 Wanted: Computer Hacker Hi, I am Michael and I am pretty sure that the bakery across the street charged me for 8 croissants yesterday even though I only bought 7. To avenge this injustice, I need someone to help me hack into the bakery's computer and transfer the cost of a croissant from their account to mine. If you are good at technology, be outside the bakery at 5.18pm with a computer and we can carry out my plan. Here is what it will involve O We will be dressed as bakers so that people don't get suspicious (I will bring a spare baker's hat just in case you don't have your own) If anyone asks us what we're doing, just say, "We own a rival bakery called Full Speed Abread and we are just checking out the competition" I have memorised the Wikipedia page on bread so if they ask any detailed questions about bread, leave it to me If they ask any questions about bread that I can't answer, I will shout "RUN". That will be the signal that our cover has been blown and we need to get out of there If you do this job right and reimburse me for the croissant, I will see to it that you are rewarded. I will NOT pay you in money because that would leave a money trail that the police could use to track us down. However, since you are so interested in computers, I will pay you in floppy disks, like the one below. And don't worry, that's not the only floppy disk that will that came from be coming your way. There are plenty more where Michael Re: Bakery Hack Hi. Michael again from the poster above. I have just remembered that I only have one baker's hat so you will need to bring your own. Hopefully this is not a problem. If it is,I could possibly borrow the protective headgear from my uncle's beekeeper's suit and you could wear that instead? h ow this is not ideal but it will have to do. Michael Wanted: Computer Hacker

Wanted: Computer Hacker

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Af, Apple, and Church: an entomologist rates ant emojis Apple Beautful big almand eye, realistic and fuil of espression as she gazes gently at you. Ebowed antennze and delicately segmented legs and body. Gorgeous pearascent shean lke slhe is glowing This ant moisturizes. This ant is round and huggable. This ant is a star 11/10 Google Beautfully detailed, elike pose but with an unexpecled neck and odd antennae, perhaps scared straight. Her eyes sugpest she has seen things. Her eepression confirms she has seen too much, Sha is haunted and I want to know more7/10 Microsoft Floppy antens pointy muppet fsc, oddy posed legs. What is she? She has no waist. May be she ls some kind of bee in doguise? l ind her unsetting 3/10 This ant has an unexplained, double jointed thorax, and no evidence of a ist Her four-looled pose suggests that she s centaur rather than an ant ants would be re what was iniended here. 2/10 WhatsApp Good rst impression, kind of bland in the details. This ant has no parscular waist to speak of, floppy rather han ebowed anlennae, and an inexpressive face. Her color scheme is soft and hazy. Iike the sharp angles of her styishly sophisticated laga. This ant may not know quie were she is going, but she knows how she is geting there.6/10 Twitter Were you even trying 0/10 Facebook Gasp This ant is elegant. This ant has a beauttul tapered thorax, a segmented abdomen, alert, ebowed antennae, and a ight-looled pose. This ant's face supgests ouriosity and a desire to explore the world. This ant nspires me. I want to be ike her 10/10 EmojiOne 3-legged. waistless centaurant with strange, linp antennae and a beak. I囟n't know what this is kind af reminds me of & Hork-Bair 1/0, not n ant emojidex This ant... makes me sad. All of her legs are broken The MS Paint art style and gradent abuse cowey distress. She has a duck beak Despie his, her expresnon suggests perseveranoe and determined deertless י want this ant to have a better Iite.I am rooting for her. 3/10 Messenger This ant is a bold and challenging mbture of photorealism and caricature. She is broad and low-bull and seerns very sturdy. She looks like sh๑ would help you mave. This ant is a dependable friend. 9/10 LG A picture of an ant from a children's book. She is wearing Ittle boots. This ant is wrong irevery way, and yet I can't stay mad齜her. T/10 HTC An interesing, op-down view of an ant, her legs are postioned with sighdy iamng symmetry Nevertheless, her overal impresson that of a gracett stylzed design, lke a piciograph. She is sutable for adorning fine garments and jewelry ar parhaps gracing the wals of a Sny ant church 1ike this Mozilla This is a Sermile-1010 An entomologist rates the ant emojis

An entomologist rates the ant emojis

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Af, Apple, and Church: an entomologist rates ant emojis Apple Beautful big almand eye, realistic and fuil of espression as she gazes gently at you. Ebowed antennze and delicately segmented legs and body. Gorgeous pearascent shean lke slhe is glowing This ant moisturizes. This ant is round and huggable. This ant is a star 11/10 Google Beautfully detailed, elike pose but with an unexpecled neck and odd antennae, perhaps scared straight. Her eyes sugpest she has seen things. Her eepression confirms she has seen too much, Sha is haunted and I want to know more7/10 Microsoft Floppy antens pointy muppet fsc, oddy posed legs. What is she? She has no waist. May be she ls some kind of bee in doguise? l ind her unsetting 3/10 This ant has an unexplained, double jointed thorax, and no evidence of a ist Her four-looled pose suggests that she s centaur rather than an ant ants would be re what was iniended here. 2/10 WhatsApp Good rst impression, kind of bland in the details. This ant has no parscular waist to speak of, floppy rather han ebowed anlennae, and an inexpressive face. Her color scheme is soft and hazy. Iike the sharp angles of her styishly sophisticated laga. This ant may not know quie were she is going, but she knows how she is geting there.6/10 Twitter Were you even trying 0/10 Facebook Gasp This ant is elegant. This ant has a beauttul tapered thorax, a segmented abdomen, alert, ebowed antennae, and a ight-looled pose. This ant's face supgests ouriosity and a desire to explore the world. This ant nspires me. I want to be ike her 10/10 EmojiOne 3-legged. waistless centaurant with strange, linp antennae and a beak. I囟n't know what this is kind af reminds me of & Hork-Bair 1/0, not n ant emojidex This ant... makes me sad. All of her legs are broken The MS Paint art style and gradent abuse cowey distress. She has a duck beak Despie his, her expresnon suggests perseveranoe and determined deertless י want this ant to have a better Iite.I am rooting for her. 3/10 Messenger This ant is a bold and challenging mbture of photorealism and caricature. She is broad and low-bull and seerns very sturdy. She looks like sh๑ would help you mave. This ant is a dependable friend. 9/10 LG A picture of an ant from a children's book. She is wearing Ittle boots. This ant is wrong irevery way, and yet I can't stay mad齜her. T/10 HTC An interesing, op-down view of an ant, her legs are postioned with sighdy iamng symmetry Nevertheless, her overal impresson that of a gracett stylzed design, lke a piciograph. She is sutable for adorning fine garments and jewelry ar parhaps gracing the wals of a Sny ant church 1ike this Mozilla This is a Sermile-1010 An entomologist rates the ant emojis via /r/funny https://ift.tt/2AJ9ifk

An entomologist rates the ant emojis via /r/funny https://ift.tt/2AJ9ifk

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Computers, Money, and Police: @Michael1979 Wanted: Computer Hacker Hi, I am Michael and I am pretty sure that the bakery across the street charged me for 8 croissants yesterday even thoughI only bought 7. To avenge this injustice, I need someone to help me hack into the bakery's computer and transfer the cost of a croissant from their account to mine. If you are good at technology, be outside the bakery at 5.18pm with a computer and we can carry out my plan. Here is what it will involve We will be dressed as bakers so that people don't get suspicious (I will bring a spare baker's hat just in case you don't have your own) If anyone asks us what we're doing, just say, "We own a rival bakery called Full Speed Abread and we are just checking out the competition" I have memorised the Wikipedia page on bread so if they ask any detailed questions about bread, leave it to me If they ask any questions about bread that I can't answer, I will shout "RUN". That will be the signal that our cover has been blown and we need to get out of there If you do this job right and reimburse me for the croissant, I will see to it that you are rewarded. I will NOT pay you in money because that would leave a money trail that the police could use to track us down. However, since you are so interested in computers, I will pay you in floppy disks, like the one below. And don't worry, that's not the only floppy disk th at will be coming your way. There are plenty more where that came from Michael Re: Bakery Hack Hi. Michael again from the poster above. I have just remembered that I only have one baker's hat so you will need to bring your own. Hopefully this is not a problem. If it is,I could possibly borrow the protective headgear from my uncle's beekeeper's suit and you could wear that instead? F kn ow this is not ideal but it will have to do. Michael me🍞 irl

me🍞 irl

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Computers, Money, and Police: @Michael1979 Wanted: Computer Hacker Hi, I am Michael and I am pretty sure that the bakery across the street charged me for 8 croissants yesterday even thoughI only bought 7. To avenge this injustice, I need someone to help me hack into the bakery's computer and transfer the cost of a croissant from their account to mine. If you are good at technology, be outside the bakery at 5.18pm with a computer and we can carry out my plan. Here is what it will involve We will be dressed as bakers so that people don't get suspicious (I will bring a spare baker's hat just in case you don't have your own) If anyone asks us what we're doing, just say, "We own a rival bakery called Full Speed Abread and we are just checking out the competition" I have memorised the Wikipedia page on bread so if they ask any detailed questions about bread, leave it to me If they ask any questions about bread that I can't answer, I will shout "RUN". That will be the signal that our cover has been blown and we need to get out of there If you do this job right and reimburse me for the croissant, I will see to it that you are rewarded. I will NOT pay you in money because that would leave a money trail that the police could use to track us down. However, since you are so interested in computers, I will pay you in floppy disks, like the one below. And don't worry, that's not the only floppy disk th at will be coming your way. There are plenty more where that came from Michael Re: Bakery Hack Hi. Michael again from the poster above. I have just remembered that I only have one baker's hat so you will need to bring your own. Hopefully this is not a problem. If it is,I could possibly borrow the protective headgear from my uncle's beekeeper's suit and you could wear that instead? F kn ow this is not ideal but it will have to do. Michael me🍞 irl

me🍞 irl

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Computers, Money, and Police: @Michael1979 Wanted: Computer Hacker Hi, I am Michael and I am pretty sure that the bakery across the street charged me for 8 croissants yesterday even though I only bought 7. To avenge this injustice, I need someone to help me hack into the bakery's computer and transfer the cost of a croissant from their account to mine. If you are good at technology, be outside the bakery at 5.18pm with a computer and we can carry out my plan. Here is what it will involve o We will be dressed as bakers so that people don't get suspicious (I will bring a spare baker's hat just in case you don't have your own) If anyone asks us what we're doing, just say, "We own a rival bakery called Full Speed Abread and we are ju checking out the competition" I have memorised the Wikipedia page on bread so if they ask any detailed questions about bread, leave it to me If they ask any questions about bread that I can't answer, I will shout "RUN". That will be the signal that our cover has been blown and we need to get out of there If you do this job right and reimburse me for the croissant, I will see to it that you are rewarded. I will NOT pay you in money because that would leave a money trail that the police could use to track us down. However, since you are so interested in computers, I will pay you in floppy disks, like be coming your way. There are plenty more where the one below. And don't worry, that's not the only floppy disk that will that came from Michael Re: Bakery Hack Hi. Michael again from the poster above. I have just remembered that I only have one baker's hat so you will need to bring your own. Hopefully this is not a problem. If it is,I could possibly borrow the protective headgear from my uncle's beekeeper's suit and you could wear that instead? ow this is not ideal but it will have to do. Michael Wanted: Computer Hacker

Wanted: Computer Hacker

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Computers, Pressure, and School: arionwind: autismserenity: arionwind: autismserenity: ARE computers flammable? 1 feel like they're probably not? This depends entirely on how much uncooked rice you have shoved in the floppy drive Ok 1 feel like there's a story behind this There is, yes! After I quit school, I worked briefly as a computer repair tech. Going to people's houses or businesses, fixing their various bugs, etc. While I would rapidly decide that field was not for me because of the one businessman who needed mult know, you push that button and that plastic holder thing with the hole comes out 1 think it is technically call the "Cup Depository Tray CD, right?), he is not the most memorable encounter. No, that goes to one of the nicest ladies I ever encountered on this job iple cup holde eplacements (you She called us out because her computer had stopped turning on, and wouldn't even make a noise when she tried to push the button. One day it had just shut off while she was using it and stubbornly refused to come back on, and could we please see what we could do to fix it? So I go out there expecting some wire had gotten loose and there was no power getting to the machine or something. It happens sometimes if a machine gets banged around enough, or if someone fiddles with it wrong or is careless putting it together, computers are finicky like that But as soon as I get to the box itself, 1 know it isn't that simple, because of the smell. I have smelled computers with dust all up in them, that isn't uncommon, but this is just vile and, more importantly, entirely new. I am now more curious than afraid, so 1 open it up and there is a mass of goopy off-white mush spilling all over everything, parts of it are burnt to circuits, there is almost nothing untouched by the mass. But by far the worst off is the A drive. That is the obvious source of the problem, and the thing has not "exploded", but more burst from the pressure of whatever this stuff was So 1 ask the woman if she had used the floppy drive recently and noticed any problems, and she says no, not until the whole machine stopped working. But I come to find out what she used it for Turns out this woman was a devout Shinto practitioner and believed that her computer (among other things) had a soul that needed to be respected an honored. Which, fair enough. But she chose to honor it by feeding it a grain of rice every time she had to wake it up and disturb For years this kindhearted woman had been putting a grain of rice into the A driv from sleep mode. And eventually that was enough pressure to break the drive and start spilling out onto the internal bits, where the heat melted it all and caused no end of problems ime she turned it on or woke t iing u After that it was a simple enough thing to explain that there are better ways to honor and take care of your computer's needs, what with virus scans or defrags and the like, but t poor device was entirely lost. I guess the moral of the story here is that you can try your best to be good and still wind up hurting people? Maybe? Or else it's that even the most horrible out of context problem isn't nearly as frustrating as one middle aged jerk who won't freaking listen when you tell him that CD trays are not for your dang coffee cups! The end A tale from tech support

A tale from tech support

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