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Crazy, Fucking, and Funny: Donatello/Michelangelo kittyknowsthings: friendlylycanthrope: ao3tagoftheday: ethermaster: ao3tagoftheday: [Image Description: Tag reading 鈥渄onatello/michelangelo鈥漖 The AO3 Tag of the Day is: Renaissance fanart I鈥檓 gonna let you in on a secret. That aint renaissance fanart You know what, assholes? I run this blog for y'all every day. I see things you cannot begin to imagine. I have to read people鈥檚 Robespierre smut and their questions about how various monsters would fuck them. I am so jaded that, when someone submits a tag mentioning some random vaguely liquid substance without context, I just assume it鈥檚 being used as lube. Nutella? Lube. Crazy glue? Lube. Divine fucking ichor? Fucking lube! I do this for you, y'all. I shield you from this shit. I stand athwart the tides of horror, hold my hands up, and yell 鈥淪TOP鈥 in the hopes that it will keep the waters from reaching you. So you know what, fuckheads!? If I want to maintain the one tiny scrap of innocence I have left, I will. The official policy of AO3TagoftheDay is now that turtles, teenage, mutant, ninja, or otherwise, do not fuck. It never happens. They don鈥檛 fuck. They don鈥檛 fuck each other. They don鈥檛 fuck humans. They don鈥檛 fuck in real life and they don鈥檛 fuck in fiction. This tag is about two gay Renaissance painters holding each other close and kissing chastely under the Sistine chapel ceiling. There. Glad we got that sorted out. Please return to your regularly scheduled programming. Ao3tagoftheday finally snapped I don鈥檛 know why this is so funny but I鈥檓 laughing to the point of tears
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Frick, Fucking, and Internet: tash @yeahstyles * Follow my uber driver just threatened to drive the car off a cliff help me Uber Support e @Uber Support Follow UBER @yeahstyles That is absolutely not okay. Please DM us your email address associated to your Uber account so we can follow up. RETWEETS LIKES 2,780 1,945 2:14 AM-20 Mar 2016 calis-discourse: kirsty-not-kristy: amoxli: ok so I don鈥檛 usu reblog this stuff here but last year I had a horrible experience with an Airbnb host who threatened to bust my kneecaps, stalk me and murder me right? And not only did I GO TO THE POLICE before cancelling the reservation, but I also provided copies of that documentation to Airbnb customer service (I should mention after hunting down that number in the depths of the stupid internet and being on hold for an hour). Did they give me a refund for the months I鈥檇 paid in advance? No - they accused me of lying! A few weeks later in a fit of desperation, a coworker suggested I tweet to Airbnb. Ok. I have maybe 30 followers on Twitter, and didn鈥檛 really use it at the time, but I thought, fuck it. Nothing to lose now. I made a half assed attempt at an overly indignant tweet with plenty of capitalization, and you know what happened? Within the HOUR. It was taken down. I was DMed by a CSR. And I was given a FULL. REFUND. $1500 like THAT. I don鈥檛 know what kind of dystopic fucking reality we live in where police reports mean nothing and the PR value from a half assed tweet to 30 followers outweighs the safety of my kneecaps, but. Social media鈥 Lesson learned, I guess. Rebooting this addition because holy shit??? Okay what the frick
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Butt, Friday, and Girls: Good morning gorgeous Mornin ( So I'm writing this book I've been working on it for a while, but I'm just stuck and have been for ages It's called "girls l'll disappoint in my 20's." wanna be in a chapter? Today 10:59 AM Do I get my own chapter? Oh for sure, I've gotta go over everything I could've done differently to make sure thatl don't fuck it up next time 'round Sounds like a lot of work Nah, after disappointing so many times it comes naturally Something you're quite proud of lol What'll be the name of my chapter? Or is that something you name afterwards? Today 12:54 PM Megan all the wrong choices How's that Disappointing You're doing well I can only go up from here My plan is working perfectly Oh? I'm just imagining you sitting there rubbing your hands together like an evil villain lol Oh yeah that's exactly what is happening here. Got my master plan right on track Next step is to make an awful first date and me dress up. n shist is about as nice Nah we're gonna find a nice bridge, cra open a carton of eggs and have some hobo chili Lmfao That sounds interesting Do the eggs go in the chili or do I get to throw them? Nah we throw them at each other, and let our body heat cook them. Just like how they did in the old days SWEET After that we can go to the local fountain and swim for a bit before qetting dessert Today 4:24 PM Can we get beignets? Today 4:42 PM Fine but you're paying Gonna be the worst date ever Ok so long as you're cooking the hobo chili K but in gonna burn it Fair warning When is this date? And there are gonna be a few hairs in it Extra flavor Oh god When are you free? I've got a butt load of work till Friday afternoon : I'm free Friday That works for me Cool Here's my number T Hobo chili
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Alive, Bad, and College: Side Effects Follow ECTS @SideEffectsNews Why aren't millennials giving blood? bit.ly/2fRZG5i 5:14 PM 28 Sep 2017 Belinda Blumenthal @philomenapunk Follow because we all gay ide Effects @SideEffectsNews Why aren't millennials giving blood? bit.ly/2fRZG5i 11:29 AM 3 Oct 2017 3,199 Retweets 11,051 Likes agapantoblu: somecunttookmyurl: creaturethatcries: dr-dendritic-trees: karnythia: voidbat: genderfuckt: optimysticals: the-fury-of-a-time-lord: luidilovins: the-modern-satyr: seedydemigod: captainfunkpunkandroll: the-real-eye-to-see: Didn鈥檛 even know people are not allowed to give blood if they are gay That鈥檚 been the thing for years. The HIV scare of the 鈥80s prohibited us from donating blood. And they still hold that against us despite the fact that that claim has been debunked over and over again. the wording on the paperwork is 鈥淎re you a man who has had sexual intercourse with a man after 1980鈥 or 鈥淎re you a woman who has had sexual intercourse with a man who has had sexual intercourse with another man since 1980鈥 (this was a blood drive at my college where majority of the students werent Alive in 1980.) I donated all the time back when I was a virgin, because o- , but now I鈥檓 not allowed to. So a better question for this article is 鈥淲hy won鈥檛 baby boomers let queer people donate blood, even though all the blood gets screened for HIV and aids anyway?鈥 though, theres a lot of room for loopholes in the wording of it This fucking matters. Bias in medicine is bias that should not exist. Fucking fix it. This is disgusting hey trans people can鈥檛 give blood either. was banned from a plasma place for having the nerve to show up and be trans. 鈥渨e don鈥檛 serve you people鈥. This is one of the reasons why it was painful for a LOT of Queer people after the Pulse shooting. We kept seeing messages calling for blood donations but so many of us can鈥檛 donate. We couldn鈥檛 even help our own community.聽 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! as someone who has received money and/or drugs in exchange for sex, i have a lifetime ban on giving blood. FURTHERMORE, my whore blood is so filthy that if you鈥檝e had sex with me in the past year, YOU can鈥檛 give blood! and that鈥檚 a federal goddamn guideline, folks! If you lived in Europe for 3 months between 1980 and 1996 you can鈥檛 donate blood which basically takes out everyone who ever served in the military and was stationed overseas, anyone who studied abroad or anyone who had a job overseas during that period. The Red Cross is always announcing they have a shortage of blood donors but they create the shortage with the byzantine array of restrictions that they refuse to revisit.聽 Okay, the above stuff is stigma and total crap, we have efficient screens for HIV and things now, the blood will be screened anyway, banning people for their sexual history is completely prejudice and its wasteful, and those rules really need to go. But the last one, the ban on donation for people living in Europe, is actually done for a reason. Its an attempt to limit the spread of vCJD, which we don鈥檛 have a way of screening for right now. Last i went you could donate blood if trans, I was openly trans at my blood clinic and they took me. So its probably just that particular clinic, which I say so that other trans people arent discouraged from trying to donate. Also鈥 as long as its the only question you lie on鈥 if theres a blood shortage emergency I really dont see why not lie on that one question. Like its terrible to have to do that and im not trying to make you feel bad if you avoiding donating because of it, but since we know its not scientifically founded it seems perfectly moral to me to lie on that one question if you want to donate. There鈥檚 not really a way for them to fact check that. I really never understood why people don鈥檛 just LIE 鈥淗eartbroken they couldn鈥檛-鈥 JUST LIE ON THE FORM I鈥檓 an openly queer woman in Italy and I鈥檝e never lied on my form, but also, my form doesn鈥檛 even ask the gender of my partner. All the questions are phrased聽鈥渉ave you had any heterosexual or homosexual intercourse in the past six months?鈥,聽鈥渉ave you changed partner in the past six months?鈥 They are willingly phrased to work for all people because there鈥檚 literally no scientific reason as to why straight blood would be safer than gay blood.It鈥檚 just a formality. Honestly, you could write you just had an orgy and as long as you claim you鈥檝e practiced safe sex they鈥檒l give you the green card to donate. At most, they mark your sack for a more thorough venereal diseases screening in case you couldn鈥檛 affirm for sure that you鈥檙e 100% clean.The whole聽鈥渂ut after the AIDS scare鈥 discourse is bullcrap. They give AIDS informative flyers to all donors once a year and they screen for HIV all the sacks. Whenever you donate, you get the analysis results back and if you check, straight or gay, there鈥檚 always the results for the HIV test. Because medicine knows that straights and gays are all equally likely to be affected, it鈥檚 how it is.If you鈥檙e gay, you can donate. If you鈥檙e trans, the most that can happen is that your doctor allows you two yearly donations, roughly six months apart, if you are having your period; otherwise you鈥檙e allowed three yearly donations, roughly four months apart. That鈥檚 it.If the forms are like those provided in Italy, you won鈥檛 have even have to lie. If you live in some dumbass country that thinks you cannot donate if you鈥檙e queer, though, yeah, just fucking lie about it because there is no valid reason that says you cannot give blood.It鈥檚 an whole different matter聽if we鈥檙e talking about restrictions based on where you were at X date.These questions are common worldwide because they refer to viruses and infections that cannot be screened.聽This is not made because the Red Cross is mean and cruel and whatever the fuck; it鈥檚 because they cannot be sure your blood is not contaminated and since the blood is going to someone who, it stands to reason,聽is already compromised on their own, they cannot fight their own battle and add more. That鈥檚 why you cannot donate.聽My uncle died because he was fighting leukemia and was injected a transfusion of infected blood. DO NOT LIE ON THE FORM ABOUT ILLNESSES YOU HAD OR PLACES YOU鈥橵E BEEN TO. YOUR WISH TO DONATE IS WORTH JACK SHIT IF YOU CONTAMINATE SOMEONE BECAUSE YOU WEREN鈥橳 HONEST.
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