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Comfortable, Definitely, and Family: khadij-al-kubra: simplelittlepaperyanon: shitposting-hobbits-to-gallifrey: transrants: a-little-bi-furious: transrants: idopaint-themgreen: the-fury-of-a-time-lord: lgbtqblogs: Two brides have become two of the most kickass women in the world by marrying to protest against homophobia in Russia. Alina Davis, a 23-year-old trans woman, and Allison Brooks, her 19-year-old partner, donned matching white floor-length bridal gowns and married at a civil registry office earlier this month. As Davis is still legally regarded as male, the office had no choice but to hand them a marriage certificate. The couple said officials chided them, and appeared to be violent. ‘She called us the shame of the family and said we need medical treatment … I was afraid my pussycat [an affectionate pet name in Russian] would beat the fuck out of her,’ Davis said on her VK page. But the couple were allowed to sign the papers, meaning a gay couple in Russia are legally recognized as married – even if it’s through a loophole. ‘This is an important precedent for Russia,’ Davis said. Russia banned same-sex marriage and outlawed ‘gay propaganda’ in 2013. holy jesus look at these two warrior princesses they are my heroes YOU GO GIRLS “Oh, you don’t wanna recognize my gender? Okay then lol guess you have to recognize my marriage” that is amazing TRANS EXCELLENCE Okay but other reports state that Alina identifies as androgyne but feels more comfortable as a woman, it definitely is trans excellence but the label she uses is not reported correctly here. Thanks for the info! (This means it’s not only trans excellence but also NONBINARY EXCELLENCE YEAH!) Fucking amazing “Can I be woman?”  “No.”  “I am still man?”  “Yes.”  “I can has wife, then?” [Russian government sweats nervously] Ya gotta love loopholes!
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America, Ass, and England: tumblr Follow priscellie later-homenuggets my friend left her window open in her bedroom and came back to find this look at his self-satisfied little face, the cheeky shit motherfucking australia amour-vengeance if there was a post to describe australia, this is it wait you mean to tell me this isn't even a pet bird? that in australia, you have wild birds that just fhy from house to house with the express purpose of fucking shit up? fucking HELL australia, what is wrong with you? lumoslouis wake up australia That's what birds do They fly around and fuck shit up Do you have some kind of mysterious nice birds in your weird foreign country Do birds in America and England fly into your house and make the bed and tidy up the living room a little bit kennilworthy-thisp It's cold here, so they just bounce off the windows and lie there and twitch spasmodically while you look for the shovel. happyvegetable Basically hurling themselves at windows is the worst thing birds do yeah man a kookaburra literally flew into a classroom at my high school and just sat his smug ass down on top of the desk for a good 20 minutes millshouse why has nobody mentioned the fact that in australia there are 3-4 months a year where everybody just accepts that they're going to get attacked by magpies. It is literally called "swooping season" and these birds will fly down to peck your fucking face, and people get their eyes ripped out and shit, it's fucking brutal. sociopathic-italian-grandmas My teacher had to go to hospital and have surgery because of swooping season. It was in the parking lot of school and all the kids would do a mad dash towards the car as the magpies tried to kill us. gallifrey-feels no but when you're 12 years old and riding your bike like mad on the way home from school with an icecream bucket on your head with like branches and shit sticking out if it to scare them off and none of this is considered strange ecnamor-lacimehc-ym what the actual fuck australia priscellie I am pretty sure all of these Australia stories are a massive, globally-spanning trolling effort, and only the people who have visited the country are allowed to be in on the joke seananmcguire Nope Went there Parrots tried to take our car Came home IN A FUCKING HURRY 587,061 notes Now thats just fowl play
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America, Apparently, and Ass: zornsable: reversingyourpolarity: elidyce: seananmcguire: priscellie: ecnamor-lacimehc-ym: gallifrey-feels: sociopathic-italian-grandmas: millshouse: meganiun: happyvegetable: kennilworthy-thisp: derinthemadscientist: lumoslouis: soloontherocks: amour-vengeance: later-homenuggets: my friend left her window open in her bedroom and came back to find this look at his self-satisfied little face, the cheeky shit motherfucking australia if there was a post to describe australia, this is it wait.  you mean to tell me this isn’t even a pet bird? that in australia, you have wild birds that just fly from house to house with the express purpose of fucking shit up? fucking HELL australia, what is wrong with you? wake up australia  That’s what birds do They fly around and fuck shit up Do you have some kind of mysterious nice birds in your weird foreign country Do birds in America and England fly into your house and make the bed and tidy up the living room a little bit It’s cold here, so they just bounce off the windows and lie there and twitch spasmodically while you look for the shovel. Basically hurling themselves at windows is the worst thing birds do yeah man a kookaburra literally flew into a classroom at my high school and just sat his smug ass down on top of the desk for a good 20 minutes why has nobody mentioned the fact that in australia there are 3-4 months a year where everybody just accepts that they’re going to get attacked by magpies. It is literally called “swooping season” and these birds will fly down to peck your fucking face, and people get their eyes ripped out and shit, it’s fucking brutal. My teacher had to go to hospital and have surgery because of swooping season. It was in the parking lot of school and all the kids would do a mad dash towards the car as the magpies tried to kill us. no but when you’re 12 years old and riding your bike like mad on the way home from school with an icecream bucket on your head with like branches and shit sticking out if it to scare them off and none of this is considered strange what the actual fuck australia  I am pretty sure all of these Australia stories are a massive, globally-spanning trolling effort, and only the people who have visited the country are allowed to be in on the joke. Nope. Went there. Parrots tried to take our car. Came home IN A FUCKING HURRY. Interesting thing about magpies - they’re not great at identifying individual humans visually, but if you make yourself identifiable in some way they’re usually open to reason. We used to have some very aggressive swoopers in our back yard - as soon as they realised that the humans *inside* the fence never bothered them and were the source of the delicious compost heap, they turned into flying black and white guard dogs who would viciously assault any passing stranger but never bothered anyone inside the yard. Several times they swooped at us when we approached from outside, then when we walked into the yard they would pull up and act incredibly apologetic like sorry ma’am I had no idea it was you I would never please don’t stop stocking the food pile. There was another little group of magpies in the park who would attack any solo pedestrian but never bothered anyone walking a dog or pushing a pram, because apparently those were identifiable traits indicating a non-threatening human. In the spirit of inquiry, I started going out of my way to be polite to the magpies - carefully walking a wide arc around them when they were on the ground, etc - and emitting an identifiable call of ‘hello birdie’ before swooping season started.  I spent the next ten years crossing that park at least once a day and as long as I turned at the first flutter of wings and said ‘hello birdie’ to the magpie waiting to attack as soon as my back was turned, I was fine. Every time, the magpie would stare at me for a minute and then fly off to harass some other pedestrian because apparently the magpies and I, we were cool.  Parrots are a lot less open to negotiation, and the little bastards travel in flocks. Beware the parrots.  Australia: the only country where it is necessary to sign a peace treaty with the birds in order to stay unmangled. They did lose the Emu War, after all.
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Apparently, Baked, and Beautiful: haiku-robot: areyoutryingtodeduceme: diglettdevious: soylent-queen: gallifrey-feels: drtanner: dancingspirals: ironychan: hungrylikethewolfie: dduane: wine-loving-vagabond: A loaf of bread made in the first century AD, which was discovered at Pompeii, preserved for centuries in the volcanic ashes of Mount Vesuvius. The markings visible on the top are made from a Roman bread stamp, which bakeries were required to use in order to mark the source of the loaves, and to prevent fraud. (via Ridiculously Interesting) (sigh) I’ve seen these before, but this one’s particularly beautiful. I feel like I’m supposed to be marveling over the fact that this is a loaf of bread that’s been preserved for thousands of years, and don’t get me wrong, that’s hella cool.  But honestly, I’m mostly struck by the unexpected news that “bread fraud” was apparently once a serious concern. Bread Fraud was a huge thing,  Bread was provided to the Roman people by the government - bakers were given grain to make the free bread, but some of them stole the government grain to use in other baked goods and would add various substitutes, like sawdust or even worse things, to the bread instead.  So if people complained that their free bread was not proper bread, the stamp told them exactly whose bakery they ought to burn down. Bread stamps continued to be used at least until the Medieval period in Europe. Any commercially sold bread had to be stamped with an official seal to identify the baker to show that it complied with all rules and regulations about size, price, and quality. This way, rotten or undersized loaves could be traced back to the baker. Bakers could be pilloried, sent down the streets in a hurdle cart with the offending loaf tied around their neck, fined, or forbidden to engage in baking commercially ever again in that city. There are records of a baker in London being sent on a hurdle cart because he used an iron rod to increase the weight of his loaves, and another who wrapped rotten dough with fresh who was pilloried. Any baker hurdled three times had to move to a new city if they wanted to continue baking. If you have made bread, you are probably familiar with a molding board. It’s a flat board used to shape the bread. Clever fraudsters came up with a molding board that had a little hole drilled into it that wasn’t easily noticed. A customer would buy his dough by weight, and then the baker would force some of that dough through the hole, so they could sell and underweight loaf and use the stolen dough to bake new loafs to sell. Molding boards ended up being banned in London after nine different bakers were caught doing this. There were also instances of grain sellers withholding grain to create an artificial scarcity drive up the price of that, and things like bread. Bread, being one of the main things that literally everyone ate in many parts of the world, ended up with a plethora of rules and regulations. Bakers were probably no more likely to commit fraud than anyone else, but there were so many of them, that we ended up with lots and lots of rules and records of people being shifty. Check out Fabulous Feasts: Medieval Cookery and Ceremony by Madeleine Pelner Cosman for a whole chapter on food laws as they existed in about 1400. Plus the color plates are fantastic. Holy shit.  Bread is serious fucking business. bread is STILL serious fucking business I recently had to deal with a sack of flour that had been half replaced with soap powder. No jokes. Another really good and informative book about bread’s significance and place in history is 6000 Years Of Bread! It’s fairly academic, but a fascinating topic and an engaging read. you guys found out the history of bread FOOD HISTORY IS THE FUCKING BEST SHUT UP DON’T EVEN LOOK AT ME food history is the fucking best shut up don’t even look at me ^Haiku^bot^9. I detect haikus with 5-7-5 format. Sometimes I make mistakes.Help me pay my electicity bills! Being robot is sometimes expensive thing. | PayPal | Patreon
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Butt, Fall, and Fucking: pixiezq extraordinaryaardvark July 28th 2014, 4:08:15 pm 30 minutes ago Source: jtoday WHY DO THEY ALWAYS SLICE THEIR PALM TO GET BLOOD. do you know how many nerve endings are in your hand?!?! why don't they ever cut the back of their arm or their leg or something omfg" me everytime a character in a movie has to get a few drops of their blood for some ritual bullshit (via jtoday) WHILE WE'RE AT IT, why do people try to cross those skinny bridges over lava/chasms/whatever by walking upright. IT'S CALLED CENTER OF GRAVITY. get on your hands and knees and crawl across that thing. HUG IT. SCOOT YOUR BUTT ACROSS. "but i look stupid!" lalalala but we'll avoid that dramatic moment where you almost fall over and die because your damn fucking self wanted to look COOL (via jtoday and stop yanking IV lines out of your arms the minute you wake up in the hospital (via panconkiwi) That is a broadsword, why are you fencing with it (via gallifrey-feels) There is a freaking door right there. Stop smashing through windows, damn it. (via intheforestofthenight) yes, mr. action hero, I am aware that running dramatically from the baddies at breakneck speed is important, but know what else is important? NOT GETTING SHOT. RUN IN A FUCKING ZIGZAG PATTERN ON THE OFF CHANCE THAT THE MOOKS WERE NOT COACHED IN MARKSMANSHIP BY THE IMPERIAL STORMTROOPERS (via pterriblepterodactyls) Oh, hey, you there, sneaky hero-type breaking into any place for any reason? WEAR SOME FUCKING GLOVES. They're called fingerprints dumbass. You have them and you're putting them all over the fucking place (via dawnpuppet) If something really fucking huge is falling on you, don't FUCKING RUN ALONG THE LENGTH JUST TAKE LIKE TWO FUCKING STEPS TO THE SIDE (via takshammy) Survival Tips
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Bad, Fresh, and Fucking: I should be filming you. <p><a href="http://friendly-neighborhood-patriarch.tumblr.com/post/163770846697/madameliberty-mary-queen-of-thots" class="tumblr_blog">friendly-neighborhood-patriarch</a>:</p> <blockquote><p><a href="https://madameliberty.tumblr.com/post/163770752371/mary-queen-of-thots" class="tumblr_blog">madameliberty</a>:</p><blockquote> <p><a href="https://mary-queen-of-thots.tumblr.com/post/163769810925/nazi-crow-did-nothing-wrong-usagi-tsukino" class="tumblr_blog">mary-queen-of-thots</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://nazi-crow-did-nothing-wrong.tumblr.com/post/163769783538/usagi-tsukino-thelaughteraddict" class="tumblr_blog">nazi-crow-did-nothing-wrong</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://usagi-tsukino.tumblr.com/post/101100398741/thelaughteraddict-deductionwiththedoctor" class="tumblr_blog">usagi-tsukino</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://thelaughteraddict.tumblr.com/post/59558679519/deductionwiththedoctor-gallifrey-feels" class="tumblr_blog">thelaughteraddict</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://deductionwiththedoctor.tumblr.com/post/59197871542/gallifrey-feels-echoingdaydreams" class="tumblr_blog">deductionwiththedoctor</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://gallifrey-feels.tumblr.com/post/34691124878/echoingdaydreams-dandeleijons" class="tumblr_blog">gallifrey-feels</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://echoingdaydreams.tumblr.com/post/34613217502/dandeleijons-mrdecomposition" class="tumblr_blog">echoingdaydreams</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://dandeleijons.tumblr.com/post/34490671160/mrdecomposition-i-wanted-to-rp-so-i" class="tumblr_blog">dandeleijons</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://mrdecomposition.tumblr.com/post/34490364730/i-wanted-to-rp-so-i" class="tumblr_blog">mrdecomposition</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://i-wanted-to-rp-so-i.tumblr.com/post/34325409858/wholocked-me-in-my-mindpalace" class="tumblr_blog">i-wanted-to-rp-so-i</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://wholocked-me-in-my-mindpalace.tumblr.com/post/31722822816/improbablenormality-johnisnothisdate" class="tumblr_blog">wholocked-me-in-my-mindpalace</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://improbablenormality.tumblr.com/post/31721085459/johnisnothisdate-catatonicconundrum" class="tumblr_blog">improbablenormality</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://johnisnothisdate.tumblr.com/post/31688289337/catatonicconundrum-adolfi-hitler-flirting" class="tumblr_blog">johnisnothisdate</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://catatonicconundrum.tumblr.com/post/31677704806" class="tumblr_blog">catatonicconundrum</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://adolfi.tumblr.com/post/31674992944/hitler-flirting-with-eva-braun" class="tumblr_blog">adolfi</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>Hitler flirting with Eva Braun.</p> </blockquote> <p>I don’t know how this makes me feel</p> </blockquote> <p>It makes me feel very uncomfortable</p> </blockquote> <p>You know what’s so uncomfortable about this? It shows that perhaps one of the most evil men in history, was a human being. That, on occasion, he could be nice, even flirty. That’s not all. You want to see evil people as evil, screaming horrible stuff over a desk with 20 microphones with 20, 000 people saluting them. The evil is clear and recognizable then. This shows a completely different image, it scares you because that means that evil isn’t a stereotype, that evil is not recognizable, that evil could be anyone. It scares you because this shows that could be lurking inside anyone and you’ll never ever know. Maybe in you? </p> </blockquote> <p>i reblogged this literally like 2 minutes ago, but i want this version because of that comment ^</p> </blockquote> <p>That comment is one of my favorite post commentaries, because it’s completely right. People aren’t inherently evil. Like good, it’s a role they grow and live into. We have just as much potential to destroy as this man exhibited. And it’s a very eye opening experience to realize that.</p> </blockquote> <p>does anyone even remember that one time hitler attended that luncheon between world leaders, some guests of which even included china’s socialist leader as well as Stalin. And then when they were ordering, everyone was gladly ordering impressive dishes one after the other, but Hitler placed an order for barley tea and a pheasant (considered a peasant’s meal by standard). When he was questioned as to why he would order something like this in something as grand as a world leader’s congress, he replied,</p> <p>“I don’t smoke when my people cannot smoke, and I cannot eat when my people are going hungry.”</p> <p>He wasn’t evil for its own sake, let’s try to remember that despite the countless murders, but for a moment, he did actually believe he was doing something for the good of his countrymen.</p> </blockquote> <p><b>WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE</b></p> </blockquote> <p>No, he’s right. Hitler, though extremely wrong in his views, did everything for what he thought would better the lives of his people. It was wrong. It was disgustingly, horribly wrong. But he did not do it because it was evil and he was evil. He did it because he believed it would help Germany and those who needed a better life. Those who don’t understand or even try to understand the human brain will always label men like him as ‘evil’ because it is easier to accept. But he wasn’t ‘evil.’ He felt love and loyalty and responsibilities. He simply took these aspects and morphed them into a twisted, violent thing. </p> </blockquote> <p>Tumblr is probably the only place we could have this conversation and not be lynched.</p> </blockquote> <p>dang son</p> </blockquote> <h2>“Every villain is a hero in his own mind.”</h2> <p><br/>― <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/5166208.Tom_Hiddleston">Tom Hiddleston</a></p> </blockquote> <p>I love every thing about the comments.</p> </blockquote> <p>When you have to reblog a bunch of “hurt dürr Hitler was bad” bullshit because OP deleted the post. .-.</p> </blockquote> <p>this is awkward</p> </blockquote> <p>that moment when you want your favorite beloved ruthless dictator Nazi racist who is responsible for the arguably the biggest tragedy of the millennium is criticized by people on an internet site so you can’t reblog a post to romanticize an absolutely fucking evil man</p> </blockquote> <p>he still was a human being though. We have to confront that. He wasn’t a single-minded robotic monster from a bad YA novel.</p></blockquote> <p>Ah *inhales* fresh Hitler Discourse™</p>
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