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stilesisbiles: nudityandnerdery: geek-ramblings: daniellebrooksemmy: blvckgeezus: queenstravelingdarling: thatpettyblackgirl: Like I really wanna go find his water and buy some “Now say it like a regular person” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Lmfaoooo I lost it when he called willow Yes, Amazon is shit but like any giant shit corporation it HAS to do something good every once in a damn while if only for image purposes. This is one of them. On his birthday Jaden gave out his water to Flint residents. He’s doing good out here. Of all the bullshit Amazon is funding or co-sponsoring, why the hell not this? Don’t come for Jaden over this. Jaden does a crazy amount of good things and even his water company is insane. - The bottle is designed so that what it takes a normal bottle company to deliver in 5 trucks his does in 1 - The bottle is made out of as much reusable and sustainable material as possible - The town they operate in and get water from they are using part of the profits to rebuild that towns pipe infrastructure. They greatly need it. - His company will give bottles of water to Flint until all the pipes are fixed “Woah, what the heck? Is that how you drink water all the time?”This is great, I love both of them. …this is adorable and I was not prepared: stilesisbiles: nudityandnerdery: geek-ramblings: daniellebrooksemmy: blvckgeezus: queenstravelingdarling: thatpettyblackgirl: Like I really wanna go find his water and buy some “Now say it like a regular person” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Lmfaoooo I lost it when he called willow Yes, Amazon is shit but like any giant shit corporation it HAS to do something good every once in a damn while if only for image purposes. This is one of them. On his birthday Jaden gave out his water to Flint residents. He’s doing good out here. Of all the bullshit Amazon is funding or co-sponsoring, why the hell not this? Don’t come for Jaden over this. Jaden does a crazy amount of good things and even his water company is insane. - The bottle is designed so that what it takes a normal bottle company to deliver in 5 trucks his does in 1 - The bottle is made out of as much reusable and sustainable material as possible - The town they operate in and get water from they are using part of the profits to rebuild that towns pipe infrastructure. They greatly need it. - His company will give bottles of water to Flint until all the pipes are fixed “Woah, what the heck? Is that how you drink water all the time?”This is great, I love both of them. …this is adorable and I was not prepared
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solacekames: 8:08 AM PDT 8/16/2019 by Kareem Abdul-JabbarThe NBA great and Hollywood Reporter columnist, a friend of the late martial arts star, believes the filmmaker was sloppy, somewhat racist and shirked his responsibility to basic truth in ‘Once Upon a Time in Hollywood.’Remember that time Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. kidney-punched a waiter for serving soggy croutons in his tomato soup? How about the time the Dalai Lama got wasted and spray-painted “Karma Is a Beach” on the Tibetan ambassador’s limo? Probably not, since they never happened. But they could happen if a filmmaker decides to write those scenes into his or her movie. And, even though we know the movie is fiction, those scenes will live on in our shared cultural conscience as impressions of those real people, thereby corrupting our memory of them built on their real-life actions.That’s why filmmakers have a responsibility when playing with people’s perceptions of admired historic people to maintain a basic truth about the content of their character. Quentin Tarantino’s portrayal of Bruce Lee in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood does not live up to this standard. Of course, Tarantino has the artistic right to portray Bruce any way he wants. But to do so in such a sloppy and somewhat racist way is a failure both as an artist and as a human being.This controversy has left me torn. Tarantino is one of my favorite filmmakers because he is so bold, uncompromising and unpredictable. There’s a giddy energy in his movies of someone who loves movies and wants you to love them, too. I attend each Tarantino film as if it were an event, knowing that his distillation of the ’60s and ’70s action movies will be much more entertaining than a simple homage. That’s what makes the Bruce Lee scenes so disappointing, not so much on a factual basis, but as a lapse of cultural awareness.Bruce Lee was my friend and teacher. That doesn’t give him a free pass for how he’s portrayed in movies. But it does give me some insight into the man. I first met Bruce when I was a student at UCLA looking to continue my martial arts studies, which I started in New York City. We quickly developed a friendship as well as a student-teacher relationship. He taught me the discipline and spirituality of martial arts, which was greatly responsible for me being able to play competitively in the NBA for 20 years with very few injuries.During our years of friendship, he spoke passionately about how frustrated he was with the stereotypical representation of Asians in film and TV. The only roles were for inscrutable villains or bowing servants. In Have Gun - Will Travel, Paladin’s faithful Chinese servant goes by the insulting name of “Hey Boy” (Kam Tong). He was replaced in season four by a female character referred to as “Hey Girl” (Lisa Lu). Asian men were portrayed as sexless accessories to a scene, while the women were subservient. This was how African-American men and women were generally portrayed until the advent of Sidney Poitier and blaxploitation films. Bruce was dedicated to changing the dismissive image of Asians through his acting, writing and promotion of Jeet Kune Do, his interpretation of martial arts.That’s why it disturbs me that Tarantino chose to portray Bruce in such a one-dimensional way. The John Wayne machismo attitude of Cliff (Brad Pitt), an aging stuntman who defeats the arrogant, uppity Chinese guy harks back to the very stereotypes Bruce was trying to dismantle. Of course the blond, white beefcake American can beat your fancy Asian chopsocky dude because that foreign crap doesn’t fly here.I might even go along with the skewered version of Bruce if that wasn’t the only significant scene with him, if we’d also seen a glimpse of his other traits, of his struggle to be taken seriously in Hollywood. Alas, he was just another Hey Boy prop to the scene. The scene is complicated by being presented as a flashback, but in a way that could suggest the stuntman’s memory is cartoonishly biased in his favor. Equally disturbing is the unresolved shadow that Cliff may have killed his wife with a spear gun because she nagged him. Classic Cliff. Is Cliff more heroic because he also doesn’t put up with outspoken women?I was in public with Bruce several times when some random jerk would loudly challenge Bruce to a fight. He always politely declined and moved on. First rule of Bruce’s fight club was don’t fight — unless there is no other option. He felt no need to prove himself. He knew who he was and that the real fight wasn’t on the mat, it was on the screen in creating opportunities for Asians to be seen as more than grinning stereotypes. Unfortunately, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood prefers the good old ways.: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar: Bruce Lee Was My Friend, and Tarantino's Movie Disrespects Him 8:08 AM PDT 8/16/2019 by Kareem Abdul-Jabbar Alamy Stock Photo Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and Bruce Lee during the filming of 1978's 'Game of Death.' solacekames: 8:08 AM PDT 8/16/2019 by Kareem Abdul-JabbarThe NBA great and Hollywood Reporter columnist, a friend of the late martial arts star, believes the filmmaker was sloppy, somewhat racist and shirked his responsibility to basic truth in ‘Once Upon a Time in Hollywood.’Remember that time Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. kidney-punched a waiter for serving soggy croutons in his tomato soup? How about the time the Dalai Lama got wasted and spray-painted “Karma Is a Beach” on the Tibetan ambassador’s limo? Probably not, since they never happened. But they could happen if a filmmaker decides to write those scenes into his or her movie. And, even though we know the movie is fiction, those scenes will live on in our shared cultural conscience as impressions of those real people, thereby corrupting our memory of them built on their real-life actions.That’s why filmmakers have a responsibility when playing with people’s perceptions of admired historic people to maintain a basic truth about the content of their character. Quentin Tarantino’s portrayal of Bruce Lee in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood does not live up to this standard. Of course, Tarantino has the artistic right to portray Bruce any way he wants. But to do so in such a sloppy and somewhat racist way is a failure both as an artist and as a human being.This controversy has left me torn. Tarantino is one of my favorite filmmakers because he is so bold, uncompromising and unpredictable. There’s a giddy energy in his movies of someone who loves movies and wants you to love them, too. I attend each Tarantino film as if it were an event, knowing that his distillation of the ’60s and ’70s action movies will be much more entertaining than a simple homage. That’s what makes the Bruce Lee scenes so disappointing, not so much on a factual basis, but as a lapse of cultural awareness.Bruce Lee was my friend and teacher. That doesn’t give him a free pass for how he’s portrayed in movies. But it does give me some insight into the man. I first met Bruce when I was a student at UCLA looking to continue my martial arts studies, which I started in New York City. We quickly developed a friendship as well as a student-teacher relationship. He taught me the discipline and spirituality of martial arts, which was greatly responsible for me being able to play competitively in the NBA for 20 years with very few injuries.During our years of friendship, he spoke passionately about how frustrated he was with the stereotypical representation of Asians in film and TV. The only roles were for inscrutable villains or bowing servants. In Have Gun - Will Travel, Paladin’s faithful Chinese servant goes by the insulting name of “Hey Boy” (Kam Tong). He was replaced in season four by a female character referred to as “Hey Girl” (Lisa Lu). Asian men were portrayed as sexless accessories to a scene, while the women were subservient. This was how African-American men and women were generally portrayed until the advent of Sidney Poitier and blaxploitation films. Bruce was dedicated to changing the dismissive image of Asians through his acting, writing and promotion of Jeet Kune Do, his interpretation of martial arts.That’s why it disturbs me that Tarantino chose to portray Bruce in such a one-dimensional way. The John Wayne machismo attitude of Cliff (Brad Pitt), an aging stuntman who defeats the arrogant, uppity Chinese guy harks back to the very stereotypes Bruce was trying to dismantle. Of course the blond, white beefcake American can beat your fancy Asian chopsocky dude because that foreign crap doesn’t fly here.I might even go along with the skewered version of Bruce if that wasn’t the only significant scene with him, if we’d also seen a glimpse of his other traits, of his struggle to be taken seriously in Hollywood. Alas, he was just another Hey Boy prop to the scene. The scene is complicated by being presented as a flashback, but in a way that could suggest the stuntman’s memory is cartoonishly biased in his favor. Equally disturbing is the unresolved shadow that Cliff may have killed his wife with a spear gun because she nagged him. Classic Cliff. Is Cliff more heroic because he also doesn’t put up with outspoken women?I was in public with Bruce several times when some random jerk would loudly challenge Bruce to a fight. He always politely declined and moved on. First rule of Bruce’s fight club was don’t fight — unless there is no other option. He felt no need to prove himself. He knew who he was and that the real fight wasn’t on the mat, it was on the screen in creating opportunities for Asians to be seen as more than grinning stereotypes. Unfortunately, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood prefers the good old ways.

solacekames: 8:08 AM PDT 8/16/2019 by Kareem Abdul-JabbarThe NBA great and Hollywood Reporter columnist, a friend of the late martial ar...

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ham-of-war: inthegrimdarkness: ask-the-crimson-king: smolcatachan: Huh. That would make him about 5 tons. 2,000lbs = 1 ton. But the Blue Whale has been cited to weigh up to 200 tons. Which this meme makes Magnus featherweight in comparison to the mighty Blue Whale. Putting into pounds, the Blue Whale can weigh 40,000lbs. Now the Blue Whale can vary from 82ft to 105ft which sounded like it’d be comparable to Magnus. So I went and did a size comparison based on this picture between a Space Marine at 8ft and Magnus at 82ft and the comparison matched up to the picture.  So basically what I’m saying is that this meme grossly underestimates the majestic glory of all that is Magnus and must be corrected promptly…Please :D [In this picture, that holds up to a degree, but it is known that Magnus’ height can vary greatly. So he could weigh 5 tons, but it could depend on his height, and I imagine the actual density of the Warp matter that makes up most of his form. In the picture of him fighting Guilliman at Luna, his height is much shorter than 82ft. If Guilliman is ~11.5ft tall, that would put Magnus at… … approximately 20ft tall, plus or minus a potential foot or two since both of them seem to be crouching. I also made a weight calculation based on BMI, though it is most likely not going to be too accurate since our big red nerd here is, as I said, also comprised of Warpstuff. If he is 20ft tall, he should weigh 1.5k-2k pounds. If he was 82ft tall, he should weigh 25k-34k pounds. So while this meme is still inaccurate with the original picture, the blue whale comparison is not exactly a good one either if these calculations are to be believed.] Magnus is also a daemon of Tzeentch and shifts his form constantly, a truly accurate number is impossible Babey is a constant tho : im ten thousand pounds of BABEY ham-of-war: inthegrimdarkness: ask-the-crimson-king: smolcatachan: Huh. That would make him about 5 tons. 2,000lbs = 1 ton. But the Blue Whale has been cited to weigh up to 200 tons. Which this meme makes Magnus featherweight in comparison to the mighty Blue Whale. Putting into pounds, the Blue Whale can weigh 40,000lbs. Now the Blue Whale can vary from 82ft to 105ft which sounded like it’d be comparable to Magnus. So I went and did a size comparison based on this picture between a Space Marine at 8ft and Magnus at 82ft and the comparison matched up to the picture.  So basically what I’m saying is that this meme grossly underestimates the majestic glory of all that is Magnus and must be corrected promptly…Please :D [In this picture, that holds up to a degree, but it is known that Magnus’ height can vary greatly. So he could weigh 5 tons, but it could depend on his height, and I imagine the actual density of the Warp matter that makes up most of his form. In the picture of him fighting Guilliman at Luna, his height is much shorter than 82ft. If Guilliman is ~11.5ft tall, that would put Magnus at… … approximately 20ft tall, plus or minus a potential foot or two since both of them seem to be crouching. I also made a weight calculation based on BMI, though it is most likely not going to be too accurate since our big red nerd here is, as I said, also comprised of Warpstuff. If he is 20ft tall, he should weigh 1.5k-2k pounds. If he was 82ft tall, he should weigh 25k-34k pounds. So while this meme is still inaccurate with the original picture, the blue whale comparison is not exactly a good one either if these calculations are to be believed.] Magnus is also a daemon of Tzeentch and shifts his form constantly, a truly accurate number is impossible Babey is a constant tho

ham-of-war: inthegrimdarkness: ask-the-crimson-king: smolcatachan: Huh. That would make him about 5 tons. 2,000lbs = 1 ton. But the...

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muaddibbler:The most impressive communal shitpost I’ve yet seen from a linguistics Facebook group: S: Sofia created a poll. March 4 at 10:33 PM ever since i moved to Europe, almost every single meal i've shared someone, there comes a point where someone asks, 'how do you say "bon inenglish' and then i have appétit dobar tek / eet smakelijk / explain that this expression essentially doesn't exist in English except for the incredibly informal 'chow down' to which they always respond in mixture of horror or confusion. after all, 'bon appétit' comes from French and it often has an air of pretension or irony and 'enjoy your meal can really only be said by someone not participating in the meal or am i wrong? what English-only phrase do YOU say before a meal? welcome to flavortown bone app the teeth +78 let's eat +71 dig in! +58 Enjoy! +56 RUB A DUB DUB THANKS FOR THE +41 GRUB We luv our bread we luv our butter but +38 most of all we luv each other 1 0+ Commencing operation mastication +31 0+ i wanna munch +29 Bone apple tea +28 .. Osteoporosis 2 +19 G'appetite +16 --- Ah, I greatly consuming this food, which is definitely not human flesh 0+ +16 eat up +14 17 OM NOM NOM NOM +10 0+ i think dogs should be able to vote +9 7 2468 dig in don't wait AMOE 0+ Blonde amputee +8 Help yourself +6 tuck in +6 time to dig in +6 shallmst we nom? +5 Boom map the sheets +4 Bone fuck my Ray Romano BluRay +4 Phone apple jeans +3 eat up martha +3 it's time to mönch...it's time to crönch +3 M food +2 happy masticating +2 muaddibbler:The most impressive communal shitpost I’ve yet seen from a linguistics Facebook group
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paramud: personal-scientist: draconym: themaishi: draconym: Mutualistic pairs for an “Odd Couples” Valentine’s program at my work. (Why do so many of my big work projects revolve around Valentine’s programs?) Also, by “sea bugs,” I obviously meant “gnathiid isopod larvae.” The himan one is not as good as the rest If you mean the mutualism between humans and honeyguides, I respectfully disagree. Human/honeyguide mutualism is one of the most sophisticated interspecies relationships in the animal kingdom. While humans have domesticated many other animals for their labor, the honeyguide remains entirely wild while electing to partner up with humans. Both humans and honeyguides have each developed specific calls to signal to one another that they are on the hunt, and these calls greatly increase the likelihood of success. According to this paper: The production of this sound increased the probability of being guided by a honeyguide from about 33 to 66% and the overall probability of thus finding a bees’ nest from 17 to 54%, as compared with other animal or human sounds of similar amplitude. That’s fucking bonkers, you guys!!! There are people out there who over the course of human history have created a sound to communicate with birds, and the birds themselves have a Human Call they use to communicate with us. There is no other wild animal you can just make noises at and immediately communicate that you want it to come help you!!! What’s more, many scientists consider this relationship more exploitative on the honeyguide’s end than on our end! That’s unprecedented!! These birds have essentially negotiated a trade deal with humanity!!!! This is the stuff of fantasy movies, except it’s real. Here’s an article from The Guardian about the broader implications of this kind of relationship with wild animals. It’s a good read: Apart from with our gut bacteria, we humans don’t really have any mutualistic relationships with other creatures. There is no special tune that we can sing to magically attract nearby hedgehogs into our gardens to feast on slugs. There will never be a special wink that fishermen can offer otters, encouraging them to catch fish that we might then de-bone for them, in return for some of the catch. The world is poorer for this. OKAY BUT the noise we make at honeyguides is one of my favorite noises there is, and if y’all haven’t heard the “BRRR-HM?” call that hunters use to summon honeyguides you are SERIOUSLY missing out. There’s an audio clip on the Audobon Society’s article about them [link] @metalpaca : I HAVE TINY CRUSTACEANS STUCK IN MY GILLS! I'M HUNGRY FOR SEA BUGS! WHITETIP SHARK CLEANER WRASSE I NEED SOMEONE TO CARRY MY POLLEN TO OTHER FLOWERS I NEED NECTAR TO EAT! TICKSEED FLOWERS BUCKEYE BUTTERFLY l'M LOOKING FOR A BIG MEAL, BUT I NEED HELP FINDING A DEER I WANT TO EAT VENISON, BUT I'M TOO SMALL TO HUNT DEER! COMMON RAVEN COYOTE I NEED SOMEONE TO KEEP ANTS FROM EATING MY EGGS! I WANT A HOME WITH A BODYGUARD AND FREE ANT DELIVERY INCLUDED! COLOMBIAN LESSERBLACK TARANTULA DOTTED HUMMING FROG M. TILLERY - CYANEUS.COM /w/Av[ paramud: personal-scientist: draconym: themaishi: draconym: Mutualistic pairs for an “Odd Couples” Valentine’s program at my work. (Why do so many of my big work projects revolve around Valentine’s programs?) Also, by “sea bugs,” I obviously meant “gnathiid isopod larvae.” The himan one is not as good as the rest If you mean the mutualism between humans and honeyguides, I respectfully disagree. Human/honeyguide mutualism is one of the most sophisticated interspecies relationships in the animal kingdom. While humans have domesticated many other animals for their labor, the honeyguide remains entirely wild while electing to partner up with humans. Both humans and honeyguides have each developed specific calls to signal to one another that they are on the hunt, and these calls greatly increase the likelihood of success. According to this paper: The production of this sound increased the probability of being guided by a honeyguide from about 33 to 66% and the overall probability of thus finding a bees’ nest from 17 to 54%, as compared with other animal or human sounds of similar amplitude. That’s fucking bonkers, you guys!!! There are people out there who over the course of human history have created a sound to communicate with birds, and the birds themselves have a Human Call they use to communicate with us. There is no other wild animal you can just make noises at and immediately communicate that you want it to come help you!!! What’s more, many scientists consider this relationship more exploitative on the honeyguide’s end than on our end! That’s unprecedented!! These birds have essentially negotiated a trade deal with humanity!!!! This is the stuff of fantasy movies, except it’s real. Here’s an article from The Guardian about the broader implications of this kind of relationship with wild animals. It’s a good read: Apart from with our gut bacteria, we humans don’t really have any mutualistic relationships with other creatures. There is no special tune that we can sing to magically attract nearby hedgehogs into our gardens to feast on slugs. There will never be a special wink that fishermen can offer otters, encouraging them to catch fish that we might then de-bone for them, in return for some of the catch. The world is poorer for this. OKAY BUT the noise we make at honeyguides is one of my favorite noises there is, and if y’all haven’t heard the “BRRR-HM?” call that hunters use to summon honeyguides you are SERIOUSLY missing out. There’s an audio clip on the Audobon Society’s article about them [link] @metalpaca
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ladydiscomfortlover: godloveyell: thatpettyblackgirl: Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free should be overthrown And assuming that this DIY one is perfectly capable, if an acceptable one can be slapped together with parts found at the local Home Depot, maybe we need to ask why insurance corporations are charging so much for one in the first place. Once we no longer have to support a handful of parasitic billionaires, medical costs would drop greatly. Kill the Rich : FOX FOX 5 DC 5 @fox5dc THIS IS AWESOME! Two-year-old Logan Moore needs a walker to get around but his family didn't know if insurance would cover for one, so his local Home Depot found parts to make it themselves. MORE: bit.ly/2YTichw 10:33 AM May 28, 2019 from Washington, DC Twitter Web Client 15.6K Likes 2.6K Retweets Abbi Brown @AbbiSigns To be clear: a disabled child having to use a makeshift walker built out of cheap DIY materials instead of an appropriate walking aid designed and fitted by qualified medical professionals is not awesome. It's a travesty FOX @fox5dc May 28 5 FOX 5 DС THIS IS AWESOME! Two-year-old Logan Moore needs a walker to get around but his family didn't know if insurance would cover for one, so his local Home Depot found parts to make it themselves. MORE: bit.ly/2YTichw 8:49 AM May 29, 2019 Twitter for iPhone 28.5K Likes 8.5K Retweets ladydiscomfortlover: godloveyell: thatpettyblackgirl: Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free should be overthrown And assuming that this DIY one is perfectly capable, if an acceptable one can be slapped together with parts found at the local Home Depot, maybe we need to ask why insurance corporations are charging so much for one in the first place. Once we no longer have to support a handful of parasitic billionaires, medical costs would drop greatly. Kill the Rich

ladydiscomfortlover: godloveyell: thatpettyblackgirl: Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free shoul...

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doktorgirlfriend: michi0no: prokopetz: cheesedeity: prokopetz: bear-eggs: geekandmisandry: Wow, I had no idea Satan was so knowledgeable and generous with his time. #TeamSatan Can satan come teach a class at my school Amusingly, among the Western European demon-conjuring cults of the 16th Century, many demons were greatly valued for their skill as teachers, often to the point that grimoires would place greater emphasis on the subjects each demon was qualified to teach than on their supernatural powers. For example, this guy? Teaches moral philosophy. And this creepy dude? He’s your astronomy professor. Seriously, look this stuff up some time - it’s wild. I now want a comic or cartoon series about demon teachers and their human students. Not sure if it should be college or high school. “Aw, man - I got Professor Lionwheel. I hear if you fail his exams, he eats your legs.” “Yeah, but he’s supposed to be really good about keeping regular office hours.” “Huh. Sort of a trade-off, really.” Okay but it’s kind of fun to look this stuff up. There are literally so many teacher-demons. Like This dude is your foreign language prof. And Mister Chickenlegs is gonna teach you some manners And this guy is your freakin’ Art Professor.  BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!I wanna learn art from the hell puppy! :O(Michi, I just raided the “demons” search on your blog. Good times, lemme tell ya.DEMON DATABASE, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? Ohhhh, boy, I’m about to lose some hours here.): If you don't teach your child to obey Jesus, the devil will teach them evolution, sexuality psychology, witchcraft doktorgirlfriend: michi0no: prokopetz: cheesedeity: prokopetz: bear-eggs: geekandmisandry: Wow, I had no idea Satan was so knowledgeable and generous with his time. #TeamSatan Can satan come teach a class at my school Amusingly, among the Western European demon-conjuring cults of the 16th Century, many demons were greatly valued for their skill as teachers, often to the point that grimoires would place greater emphasis on the subjects each demon was qualified to teach than on their supernatural powers. For example, this guy? Teaches moral philosophy. And this creepy dude? He’s your astronomy professor. Seriously, look this stuff up some time - it’s wild. I now want a comic or cartoon series about demon teachers and their human students. Not sure if it should be college or high school. “Aw, man - I got Professor Lionwheel. I hear if you fail his exams, he eats your legs.” “Yeah, but he’s supposed to be really good about keeping regular office hours.” “Huh. Sort of a trade-off, really.” Okay but it’s kind of fun to look this stuff up. There are literally so many teacher-demons. Like This dude is your foreign language prof. And Mister Chickenlegs is gonna teach you some manners And this guy is your freakin’ Art Professor.  BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!I wanna learn art from the hell puppy! :O(Michi, I just raided the “demons” search on your blog. Good times, lemme tell ya.DEMON DATABASE, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? Ohhhh, boy, I’m about to lose some hours here.)

doktorgirlfriend: michi0no: prokopetz: cheesedeity: prokopetz: bear-eggs: geekandmisandry: Wow, I had no idea Satan was so knowledg...

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water-of-the-bong: ninjanaomi: otherwindow: otherwindow: Iconic seafarer beards became a trend to scare away pesky mermaids. Mermaid, seeing a bald pirate: Zero threat…!Mermaid, seeing a hairy, bearded pirate: If I get too close their face tentacles will eat me…! Most mermaids only grow short beards as not to scare baby mermaids (longer beards look like the tentacled mouths of hungry squids and octopuses). Pirates use this innate fear to their advantage to protect themselves from mermaids, hence the iconic beards and hat: I like how this is presented as factual information because it is : chwistopher @Loudwindow Mermaids typically have long and colorful hair because it's not hair at all. Humans often forget that aquatic biology still greatly affects a mermaid's "human" upper body; mermaid hair is similar to catfish whiskers dubbed "barbels", which act as sturdy, scaled, sensory limbs. Chwistopher @Loudwindow Mermaid: [brushes hair] Human: We're not so different after all:) Mermaid hair: [comes alive and hugs human friend] Human: Hmm water-of-the-bong: ninjanaomi: otherwindow: otherwindow: Iconic seafarer beards became a trend to scare away pesky mermaids. Mermaid, seeing a bald pirate: Zero threat…!Mermaid, seeing a hairy, bearded pirate: If I get too close their face tentacles will eat me…! Most mermaids only grow short beards as not to scare baby mermaids (longer beards look like the tentacled mouths of hungry squids and octopuses). Pirates use this innate fear to their advantage to protect themselves from mermaids, hence the iconic beards and hat: I like how this is presented as factual information because it is

water-of-the-bong: ninjanaomi: otherwindow: otherwindow: Iconic seafarer beards became a trend to scare away pesky mermaids. Mermaid,...

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takingbackmyfirstamendmentrights: dewdrop156: memecage: It do be like that. I was having a surprisingly good conversation with my sister recently and I was talking about how one of the reasons I don’t read as much as I used to is because I don’t have the same resources I did when I was a 4th grader. When I was a kid, I could sit and read all I wanted, all I had to to was exist and go where people took me. I didn’t have to feed myself or pay bills or keep track of things, which of course now I have to deal with all of those things so I can’t read as much and tend to read pretty easy to read books. My sister brought up the really good point that, of course I want to read easy books, I’m a young adult, in a very tumultuous phase of life, constantly being thrown new information, my brain doesnt want a classical novel, my brain wants something readable and immersive. tl;dr don’t feel bad for not reading as much as you used to, it’s okay. Read what you can when you can and don’t stress about the rest But nowadays, there are so many more resources for reading that you can gain access to. Even though you’re busy and stressed out my life, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t continue to strive to read whenever possible. I’ve compiled this basic list of super accessible ways to read in the modern age.1. LibbyLibby is a library app, and it free to use. If you have a library card (which you can either pick up at a branch or online, depending on where you live), you put in your information, and you have access to your library’s ebooks and audiobooks. Generally, you can check ebooks out for two to three weeks, and it gives you the option to renew (if someone isn’t waiting in line for that book) or return early. It’s super user- friendly. If you want to scam the system a little bit, a lot of libraries give you 30 to 60 days after making a card online to come in and actually get a physical card and show your ID. If you are looking for a specific book that your library may not have, make library cards at other locations with fake addresses and check out their supply. I personally have about eight library cards, so I always can find what I’m looking for unless it’s super rare. 2. KindleWhile you can buy the actual Amazon e-reader, you can also just use the free app. There are a bunch of ebooks you can read for free, or for a low price. If you have Kindle Unlimited ($10/month), you can borrow up to ten KU books at a time for as long as you want. A lot of authors have KU books, so it’s a good way to go. 3. NookBarnes and Noble’s Nook is similar to the Kindle—comes in a physical e-reader, but is also usable as a free app. I will say I find that their selection generally costs more than Amazon’s selection, but it’s an option if you prefer to stay away from Amazon products. One thing they do sometime around the end of the year is send you out a refund check for all the books that you purchased through them that were at a higher market price then they would’ve been elsewhere. I’ve gotten like three of these, so I figure it’s a regular thing. 4. AudibleFor people who are sight-impaired or have difficulty sitting down and reading a book, audiobooks are SO the way to go. When you sign up, you can receive up to two free audiobooks, and whatever plan you decide to go with gives you two free audiobooks a month (from a specific selection) in addition to your credits! If you have Kindle ebooks, there is sometimes an option to purchase the accompanying Audible audiobook for a super discounted rate. If you don’t like an audiobook, you can call in to return it at any time. I have something like forty or fifty audiobooks from them, and I’ve exchanged another twenty. These options are all in addition to physical books from your local library, and discount bookstores. The nice thing about ebooks is that generally they have the option to highlight and bookmark pages, change the font size and type, and even change the color of the page if you prefer.I always thought audiobooks were for old people until a few years ago when I was commuting about three hours a day for work. I wasn’t reading nearly as much, and as an avid reader, that distressed me greatly.Finally, I looked into audiobooks and it was a huge life changer. Instead of wasting three hours a day in traffic, I was reading for three hours a day that I would’ve otherwise not been able to. Not only does it make a trip go faster, but it makes it much more enjoyable.And even if you don’t want it for the commute or for the gym, audiobooks are a really good option for people who have vision problems. I have migraines when I stare at screens too much, so I pop on an audiobook and just crochet or do the dishes. I have a friend who has very bad eyesight, and he has not been able to read in something close to a year. I set him up with a library card and a Libby account, and all of a sudden, he was able to catch up on all the books he had been wanting to read!I’m just saying, I promote reading because no matter what you read, you’re learning something. Even though life is stressful and crazy and distracting, there are still ways you can find to sit down and curl up with a good book. “My brother has his sword, I have my books. And a mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone.” -Tyrion Lannister : krista (030) y@cherryblushed i used to read 3-4 full sized novels in middle school. now i see anything longer than a paragraph and bounce. i'll miss u brain cells, can't believe u peaked at age 12 15/9/18, 1:04 pm 68 Retweets 238 Likes takingbackmyfirstamendmentrights: dewdrop156: memecage: It do be like that. I was having a surprisingly good conversation with my sister recently and I was talking about how one of the reasons I don’t read as much as I used to is because I don’t have the same resources I did when I was a 4th grader. When I was a kid, I could sit and read all I wanted, all I had to to was exist and go where people took me. I didn’t have to feed myself or pay bills or keep track of things, which of course now I have to deal with all of those things so I can’t read as much and tend to read pretty easy to read books. My sister brought up the really good point that, of course I want to read easy books, I’m a young adult, in a very tumultuous phase of life, constantly being thrown new information, my brain doesnt want a classical novel, my brain wants something readable and immersive. tl;dr don’t feel bad for not reading as much as you used to, it’s okay. Read what you can when you can and don’t stress about the rest But nowadays, there are so many more resources for reading that you can gain access to. Even though you’re busy and stressed out my life, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t continue to strive to read whenever possible. I’ve compiled this basic list of super accessible ways to read in the modern age.1. LibbyLibby is a library app, and it free to use. If you have a library card (which you can either pick up at a branch or online, depending on where you live), you put in your information, and you have access to your library’s ebooks and audiobooks. Generally, you can check ebooks out for two to three weeks, and it gives you the option to renew (if someone isn’t waiting in line for that book) or return early. It’s super user- friendly. If you want to scam the system a little bit, a lot of libraries give you 30 to 60 days after making a card online to come in and actually get a physical card and show your ID. If you are looking for a specific book that your library may not have, make library cards at other locations with fake addresses and check out their supply. I personally have about eight library cards, so I always can find what I’m looking for unless it’s super rare. 2. KindleWhile you can buy the actual Amazon e-reader, you can also just use the free app. There are a bunch of ebooks you can read for free, or for a low price. If you have Kindle Unlimited ($10/month), you can borrow up to ten KU books at a time for as long as you want. A lot of authors have KU books, so it’s a good way to go. 3. NookBarnes and Noble’s Nook is similar to the Kindle—comes in a physical e-reader, but is also usable as a free app. I will say I find that their selection generally costs more than Amazon’s selection, but it’s an option if you prefer to stay away from Amazon products. One thing they do sometime around the end of the year is send you out a refund check for all the books that you purchased through them that were at a higher market price then they would’ve been elsewhere. I’ve gotten like three of these, so I figure it’s a regular thing. 4. AudibleFor people who are sight-impaired or have difficulty sitting down and reading a book, audiobooks are SO the way to go. When you sign up, you can receive up to two free audiobooks, and whatever plan you decide to go with gives you two free audiobooks a month (from a specific selection) in addition to your credits! If you have Kindle ebooks, there is sometimes an option to purchase the accompanying Audible audiobook for a super discounted rate. If you don’t like an audiobook, you can call in to return it at any time. I have something like forty or fifty audiobooks from them, and I’ve exchanged another twenty. These options are all in addition to physical books from your local library, and discount bookstores. The nice thing about ebooks is that generally they have the option to highlight and bookmark pages, change the font size and type, and even change the color of the page if you prefer.I always thought audiobooks were for old people until a few years ago when I was commuting about three hours a day for work. I wasn’t reading nearly as much, and as an avid reader, that distressed me greatly.Finally, I looked into audiobooks and it was a huge life changer. Instead of wasting three hours a day in traffic, I was reading for three hours a day that I would’ve otherwise not been able to. Not only does it make a trip go faster, but it makes it much more enjoyable.And even if you don’t want it for the commute or for the gym, audiobooks are a really good option for people who have vision problems. I have migraines when I stare at screens too much, so I pop on an audiobook and just crochet or do the dishes. I have a friend who has very bad eyesight, and he has not been able to read in something close to a year. I set him up with a library card and a Libby account, and all of a sudden, he was able to catch up on all the books he had been wanting to read!I’m just saying, I promote reading because no matter what you read, you’re learning something. Even though life is stressful and crazy and distracting, there are still ways you can find to sit down and curl up with a good book. “My brother has his sword, I have my books. And a mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone.” -Tyrion Lannister

takingbackmyfirstamendmentrights: dewdrop156: memecage: It do be like that. I was having a surprisingly good conversation with my siste...

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godloveyell: thatpettyblackgirl: Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free should be overthrown And assuming that this DIY one is perfectly capable, if an acceptable one can be slapped together with parts found at the local Home Depot, maybe we need to ask why insurance corporations are charging so much for one in the first place. Once we no longer have to support a handful of parasitic billionaires, medical costs would drop greatly. : FOX FOX 5 DC 5 @fox5dc THIS IS AWESOME! Two-year-old Logan Moore needs a walker to get around but his family didn't know if insurance would cover for one, so his local Home Depot found parts to make it themselves. MORE: bit.ly/2YTichw 10:33 AM May 28, 2019 from Washington, DC Twitter Web Client 15.6K Likes 2.6K Retweets Abbi Brown @AbbiSigns To be clear: a disabled child having to use a makeshift walker built out of cheap DIY materials instead of an appropriate walking aid designed and fitted by qualified medical professionals is not awesome. It's a travesty FOX @fox5dc May 28 5 FOX 5 DС THIS IS AWESOME! Two-year-old Logan Moore needs a walker to get around but his family didn't know if insurance would cover for one, so his local Home Depot found parts to make it themselves. MORE: bit.ly/2YTichw 8:49 AM May 29, 2019 Twitter for iPhone 28.5K Likes 8.5K Retweets godloveyell: thatpettyblackgirl: Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free should be overthrown And assuming that this DIY one is perfectly capable, if an acceptable one can be slapped together with parts found at the local Home Depot, maybe we need to ask why insurance corporations are charging so much for one in the first place. Once we no longer have to support a handful of parasitic billionaires, medical costs would drop greatly.

godloveyell: thatpettyblackgirl: Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free should be overthrown And...

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c-r-y-p-t-i-d-s: dreamyluigi-anti: sans-hates-frans: del-the-masked-thing: cottoncandycan: therevenantrising: cisnowflake: artemuscain-gamingandbs: constable-nugget: xprmnt626: socialjusticeichigo: veterinaryrambles: babyanimalgifs: THIS IS IMPORTANT This message is veterinarian-approved!!! In case it isn’t clear, that is literally the last bone of a cat’s toes attached to those claws. If you thought only the claw was being removed during declaw surgery, you are unfortunately mistaken. It’s an amputation. Get claw caps instead! They stay on pretty well and your cat can walk around normally. You can take them off whenever you want. This is great for house cats. They don’t need their claws for defense but they need them to walk the way we need toes. This keeps them from scratching you or furniture and keeps them happy and healthy. It’s a win for everyone. Plus your cat will look like it got a kitty manicure. Reblogging again for the last comment, for anyone who wants to argue about saving their precious furniture. Boom! Problem solved. I regularly trim my cat’s claws because I love him They’re super cheap too! Not really a cat person, but this is still important. PLS DONT REMOVE UR CATS TOE BONES T o e b o n e s r i m p o r t a n t The second cat my family ever owned was declawed, and she suffered GREATLY from arthritis in her last few years. She could barely get into her own litterbox and she often went on the carpet because of this. She died in my mom’s arms, obviously in pain. DO. NOT. DECLAW. YOUR. CATS. DON’T FUCKING DECLAW YOUR CATS! THAT SHIT SHOULD BE CHARGED AS ANIMAL ABUSE Reblogging here instead of just commenting: Please dont use claw caps on cats. Claw caps are meant for claws that are out 24/7; like a dogs claws. Cats are not like dogs…. again. Cat claws retract. And like some of the comments on this very post say, on cats they have to be superglued on, because cats will rip them off. And trying to remove them after can literally just rip their nail off anyways. Using claw caps on retractable clawed animals can cause serious damage, discomfort, and infection, which can then lead to…. THE AMPUTATION YOU WERE TRYING TO AVOID!!! People need to do some research before blurting out an unresearched ‘solution’ that causes just as much damage. So many people have reblogged the claw cap version and listen to it without question and that’s REALLY. REALLY. BAD. Here’s a real solution; either clip their nails manually (google how it’s easy) or just DONT. GET. A. CAT. Please reblog this and spread it around, people you cannot safely use claw caps on an animal with retractable claws. : Please don't do this to your fur babies This is what the other side of de-clawing a cat looks like... You literally cut the tips of their toes off. They will never walk correctly. They will inevitably get arthritis as a result. It hurts. They don't understand what happened to them. If you don't like claws: don't own a damn cat. c-r-y-p-t-i-d-s: dreamyluigi-anti: sans-hates-frans: del-the-masked-thing: cottoncandycan: therevenantrising: cisnowflake: artemuscain-gamingandbs: constable-nugget: xprmnt626: socialjusticeichigo: veterinaryrambles: babyanimalgifs: THIS IS IMPORTANT This message is veterinarian-approved!!! In case it isn’t clear, that is literally the last bone of a cat’s toes attached to those claws. If you thought only the claw was being removed during declaw surgery, you are unfortunately mistaken. It’s an amputation. Get claw caps instead! They stay on pretty well and your cat can walk around normally. You can take them off whenever you want. This is great for house cats. They don’t need their claws for defense but they need them to walk the way we need toes. This keeps them from scratching you or furniture and keeps them happy and healthy. It’s a win for everyone. Plus your cat will look like it got a kitty manicure. Reblogging again for the last comment, for anyone who wants to argue about saving their precious furniture. Boom! Problem solved. I regularly trim my cat’s claws because I love him They’re super cheap too! Not really a cat person, but this is still important. PLS DONT REMOVE UR CATS TOE BONES T o e b o n e s r i m p o r t a n t The second cat my family ever owned was declawed, and she suffered GREATLY from arthritis in her last few years. She could barely get into her own litterbox and she often went on the carpet because of this. She died in my mom’s arms, obviously in pain. DO. NOT. DECLAW. YOUR. CATS. DON’T FUCKING DECLAW YOUR CATS! THAT SHIT SHOULD BE CHARGED AS ANIMAL ABUSE Reblogging here instead of just commenting: Please dont use claw caps on cats. Claw caps are meant for claws that are out 24/7; like a dogs claws. Cats are not like dogs…. again. Cat claws retract. And like some of the comments on this very post say, on cats they have to be superglued on, because cats will rip them off. And trying to remove them after can literally just rip their nail off anyways. Using claw caps on retractable clawed animals can cause serious damage, discomfort, and infection, which can then lead to…. THE AMPUTATION YOU WERE TRYING TO AVOID!!! People need to do some research before blurting out an unresearched ‘solution’ that causes just as much damage. So many people have reblogged the claw cap version and listen to it without question and that’s REALLY. REALLY. BAD. Here’s a real solution; either clip their nails manually (google how it’s easy) or just DONT. GET. A. CAT. Please reblog this and spread it around, people you cannot safely use claw caps on an animal with retractable claws.
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awesomacious: A greatly written story: writing-prompt-s You're in charge of assigning every child on Earth the monster under their bed One child in particular has caused every monster assigned to him/her to quit. You decide to assign yourself. kittenwiskers Case: #273402 Status: Disastrous I stare at the file and realize I have no options, over the last 2 years every monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has quit, every last one. Her first monster; a giant goldfish-faced humanoid named Bubba, had been with her for four years and then she wasn't scared of him anymore. After that it was a string of different common, uncommon, and rare monsters... I even assigned a sentient sock monster to her. He came back crying I look on my tablet, only one assignable monster left; myself. Field work has never been my cup of tea, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So at 8:03 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte and her little brother Daniel; I slither into the space beneath Charlotte's bed Across the room underneath Daniel's crib is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind of monster. I turn my attention to the bed above me, Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach up over the bed and run an ice cold finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it again "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door somewhere in the house slams and there is an audible hitch of breath from above me. A few minutes go by I can hear Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and loud panting breaths, Charlotte scrambles off the bed and.. She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With Me. "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I The door to the bedroom slams open and I smell the stench of human intoxicants before the man even steps inside. I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of my monsters; she's afraid of her own. Francis reaches a hand under the bed and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to pull, I slither out. "What the... I cut Francis's next words off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height. Looming over the drunken man I caress my cold fingers down his face. "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my child again, I will find you, and I will do the same to you, for all eternity." I promise to him As Francis runs from the room he soils himself. I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck her back under her covers and kiss her forehead goodnight. "l'll be back tomorrow night, sleep well darling." Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the monster under her bed funny.C awesomacious: A greatly written story

awesomacious: A greatly written story

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awesomacious: A greatly written story: writing-prompt-s You're in charge of assigning every child on Earth the monster under their bed One child in particular has caused every monster assigned to him/her to quit. You decide to assign yourself. kittenwiskers Case: #273402 Status: Disastrous I stare at the file and realize I have no options, over the last 2 years every monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has quit, every last one. Her first monster; a giant goldfish-faced humanoid named Bubba, had been with her for four years and then she wasn't scared of him anymore. After that it was a string of different common, uncommon, and rare monsters... I even assigned a sentient sock monster to her. He came back crying I look on my tablet, only one assignable monster left; myself. Field work has never been my cup of tea, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So at 8:03 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte and her little brother Daniel; I slither into the space beneath Charlotte's bed Across the room underneath Daniel's crib is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind of monster. I turn my attention to the bed above me, Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach up over the bed and run an ice cold finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it again "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door somewhere in the house slams and there is an audible hitch of breath from above me. A few minutes go by I can hear Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and loud panting breaths, Charlotte scrambles off the bed and.. She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With Me. "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I The door to the bedroom slams open and I smell the stench of human intoxicants before the man even steps inside. I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of my monsters; she's afraid of her own. Francis reaches a hand under the bed and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to pull, I slither out. "What the... I cut Francis's next words off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height. Looming over the drunken man I caress my cold fingers down his face. "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my child again, I will find you, and I will do the same to you, for all eternity." I promise to him As Francis runs from the room he soils himself. I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck her back under her covers and kiss her forehead goodnight. "l'll be back tomorrow night, sleep well darling." Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the monster under her bed funny.C awesomacious: A greatly written story

awesomacious: A greatly written story

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To celebrate Minecraft’s 10 year anniversary, here is me and my project in this year’s Intel ISEF competition.: Biomes' Impact on Monster Density in Minecraft 1. Introduction and Hypothesis Minecraft is a survival/sandbox biocks. You can find monsters in the game that will spawn in that there are more monsters i came from 2009 where the goal is to survive in a world filled with ISEF dark areas. Observations has suesested n caves underground during daytime compared to at night. This suggest density of monsters in a place is affected by how many places in the area that s or monsters to spawn. The fewer places, the higher density. By this assumption, the numbes oawn in an area should be affected by the biome where the area is located SEF that the oA 3. Execution monsters who will Minccrants own system fot peogramming was used so make the exccudion aulomatic In summary, the experiment was conducted as ollows 2. Purpose The purpose of this project is to look at how changes in the mpact the number of monsters who will spawn in an area: -A platform was madc ai a predeterminot place in the game 4. Results The results are presented in arrays below weather and time got adjusied to a standard After a while the number of monsters on the platformm got counted and written down The platform was moved to a new location 13 diffencet biomes, 4 different heights and 10 different types of underlay on the platform got tested with this sctup n and conclusion ent biomes had the biggest impact on the number of monsters who spawned. The biome Deep Ocean has the highest density rs by a large margin. The follow up is the Swamp biome. Both of these biomes arc mostly water The biome with the lowest Taiga, followed by the two types of plains. These biomes has a lot of available land for monsters too spawn, so this was n the view of the hypothesis. rence between the different heights are smaller, but the difference is still there. The surface in the Minecraft world are at 64 we can see a lower density of monsters at that height. The highest platforms got the highest density of monsters s of underlay give some difference in density, but the varicty is small This can be explained by the inaccuracy of the crent types s, so it doesn't seam like the undcrlay has any effect on the monsters. se results, there seems to be no doubt that the biome and hcight an area is located, greatly affect how many monsters who will there. The hypothesi s loo spawn got the highest number of monsters on average. There seems too be some kind of correlation, but a different study be conducted too find out if this hypothesis is right s in the introduction seems to have got something right since the biomes with the least available places for To celebrate Minecraft’s 10 year anniversary, here is me and my project in this year’s Intel ISEF competition.

To celebrate Minecraft’s 10 year anniversary, here is me and my project in this year’s Intel ISEF competition.

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A greatly written story: writing-prompt-s You're in charge of assigning every child on Earth the monster under their bed One child in particular has caused every monster assigned to him/her to quit. You decide to assign yourself. kittenwiskers Case: #273402 Status: Disastrous I stare at the file and realize I have no options, over the last 2 years every monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has quit, every last one. Her first monster; a giant goldfish-faced humanoid named Bubba, had been with her for four years and then she wasn't scared of him anymore. After that it was a string of different common, uncommon, and rare monsters... I even assigned a sentient sock monster to her. He came back crying I look on my tablet, only one assignable monster left; myself. Field work has never been my cup of tea, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So at 8:03 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte and her little brother Daniel; I slither into the space beneath Charlotte's bed Across the room underneath Daniel's crib is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind of monster. I turn my attention to the bed above me, Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach up over the bed and run an ice cold finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it again "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door somewhere in the house slams and there is an audible hitch of breath from above me. A few minutes go by I can hear Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and loud panting breaths, Charlotte scrambles off the bed and.. She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With Me. "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I The door to the bedroom slams open and I smell the stench of human intoxicants before the man even steps inside. I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of my monsters; she's afraid of her own. Francis reaches a hand under the bed and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to pull, I slither out. "What the... I cut Francis's next words off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height. Looming over the drunken man I caress my cold fingers down his face. "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my child again, I will find you, and I will do the same to you, for all eternity." I promise to him As Francis runs from the room he soils himself. I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck her back under her covers and kiss her forehead goodnight. "l'll be back tomorrow night, sleep well darling." Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the monster under her bed funny.C A greatly written story

A greatly written story

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thefingerfuckingfemalefury: fire-ghoul: seekerofshores: grumpyrpgreviews: prokopetz: cheesedeity: prokopetz: bear-eggs: geekandmisandry: Wow, I had no idea Satan was so knowledgeable and generous with his time. #TeamSatan Can satan come teach a class at my school Amusingly, among the Western European demon-conjuring cults of the 16th Century, many demons were greatly valued for their skill as teachers, often to the point that grimoires would place greater emphasis on the subjects each demon was qualified to teach than on their supernatural powers. For example, this guy? Teaches moral philosophy. And this creepy dude? He’s your astronomy professor. Seriously, look this stuff up some time - it’s wild. I now want a comic or cartoon series about demon teachers and their human students. Not sure if it should be college or high school. “Aw, man - I got Professor Lionwheel. I hear if you fail his exams, he eats your legs.” “Yeah, but he’s supposed to be really good about keeping regular office hours.” “Huh. Sort of a trade-off, really.” What do you have to do to get a scholarship? I can’t believe you called Buer, Great President of Hell, Professor Lionwheel lmfao. this whole post I’M LATE FOR MY FIRST DAY AT DEMON SCHOOL : If you don't teach your child to obey Jesus, the devil will teach them evolution, sexuality psychology, witchcraft thefingerfuckingfemalefury: fire-ghoul: seekerofshores: grumpyrpgreviews: prokopetz: cheesedeity: prokopetz: bear-eggs: geekandmisandry: Wow, I had no idea Satan was so knowledgeable and generous with his time. #TeamSatan Can satan come teach a class at my school Amusingly, among the Western European demon-conjuring cults of the 16th Century, many demons were greatly valued for their skill as teachers, often to the point that grimoires would place greater emphasis on the subjects each demon was qualified to teach than on their supernatural powers. For example, this guy? Teaches moral philosophy. And this creepy dude? He’s your astronomy professor. Seriously, look this stuff up some time - it’s wild. I now want a comic or cartoon series about demon teachers and their human students. Not sure if it should be college or high school. “Aw, man - I got Professor Lionwheel. I hear if you fail his exams, he eats your legs.” “Yeah, but he’s supposed to be really good about keeping regular office hours.” “Huh. Sort of a trade-off, really.” What do you have to do to get a scholarship? I can’t believe you called Buer, Great President of Hell, Professor Lionwheel lmfao. this whole post I’M LATE FOR MY FIRST DAY AT DEMON SCHOOL
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screwdisimgoinhome: that-one-demonic-gay: that-one-demonic-gay: shootingstar912: orihime-maychan: oanimexliveo: halduron-brightwang: astrocmets: vertigo-potato: for-my-sea-of-lillies: acrylic–alien: hazycosmicjive77: bi-mabel-pines: waffelsareevil: daddy-and-his-princess-13: smalllilkitten: gingerbooknerdhufflepuff: flower-whisper: One of a Kind Life Like Enchanting Lunar Moon Light Lamp! Soft Light to give off the Moonlight Vibe for the surrounding area! Make someone’s Day with with one these Unique Lunar Moon Lamp! Currently on Sale and if you use the Code: MOON you get an additional Discount! = GET IT HERE = I WANT THIS I wish I could have it :( i’m fucking crying i NEED MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP I NEEEEED this! Adding to my endless Christmas list! I have one and they are dope!!! I got one of these over the break and it’s great! Sis gave me this for Christmas, it’s even more amazing than I thought cuz when you charge it it’s red like a blood moon, when you unplug it just touch a small silver circle, the only part non identical to the moon’s features, and it lights up, you can make it bright white or yellowish with a tap of the finger, hold the tip of your finger on the same spot to make it brighter or darker. And the details must be 3d printed cause when it lights up its a perfect replica of the moon, even the far side, not like the cheap lumpy knock offs at toy stores, this is a real detailed thoughtful peice of art.Best part, I get to carry the moon around with me to light my path at night, fall asleep reading by moonlight, and guess what…I actually have the moon that people have been fantasizing for centuries about capturing, lassoing, and bringing down to earth as a show of their love.I finally have the moon! My mom fucking got me this for christmas. I am shook my best friend got me this when she visited me irl for the first time and its the best thing ever! i have one of these and absolutely love it everything above is true, but the battery also lasts an incredibly long time! i havent charged mine in at least two weeks and despite leaving it on all night the past few nights the battery isnt dead yet. I want to sit on bed with all the lights off and hold the moon lamp, and basically think about life for a moment bc When I think about this,,, its like, make me free from Anxiety. So this would be beautiful I NEED THIS RN T_T Who else wants twenty of this babies? I ordered this bitch and I can’t fucking wait1! YES! THIS BITCH ARRIVED TODAY AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH! It also glows red slightly when it charges. Best 40 bucks I’ve even spent! I’ve got one its literally my favorite light it’s the absolute best : screwdisimgoinhome: that-one-demonic-gay: that-one-demonic-gay: shootingstar912: orihime-maychan: oanimexliveo: halduron-brightwang: astrocmets: vertigo-potato: for-my-sea-of-lillies: acrylic–alien: hazycosmicjive77: bi-mabel-pines: waffelsareevil: daddy-and-his-princess-13: smalllilkitten: gingerbooknerdhufflepuff: flower-whisper: One of a Kind Life Like Enchanting Lunar Moon Light Lamp! Soft Light to give off the Moonlight Vibe for the surrounding area! Make someone’s Day with with one these Unique Lunar Moon Lamp! Currently on Sale and if you use the Code: MOON you get an additional Discount! = GET IT HERE = I WANT THIS I wish I could have it :( i’m fucking crying i NEED MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP MOON LAMP I NEEEEED this! Adding to my endless Christmas list! I have one and they are dope!!! I got one of these over the break and it’s great! Sis gave me this for Christmas, it’s even more amazing than I thought cuz when you charge it it’s red like a blood moon, when you unplug it just touch a small silver circle, the only part non identical to the moon’s features, and it lights up, you can make it bright white or yellowish with a tap of the finger, hold the tip of your finger on the same spot to make it brighter or darker. And the details must be 3d printed cause when it lights up its a perfect replica of the moon, even the far side, not like the cheap lumpy knock offs at toy stores, this is a real detailed thoughtful peice of art.Best part, I get to carry the moon around with me to light my path at night, fall asleep reading by moonlight, and guess what…I actually have the moon that people have been fantasizing for centuries about capturing, lassoing, and bringing down to earth as a show of their love.I finally have the moon! My mom fucking got me this for christmas. I am shook my best friend got me this when she visited me irl for the first time and its the best thing ever! i have one of these and absolutely love it everything above is true, but the battery also lasts an incredibly long time! i havent charged mine in at least two weeks and despite leaving it on all night the past few nights the battery isnt dead yet. I want to sit on bed with all the lights off and hold the moon lamp, and basically think about life for a moment bc When I think about this,,, its like, make me free from Anxiety. So this would be beautiful I NEED THIS RN T_T Who else wants twenty of this babies? I ordered this bitch and I can’t fucking wait1! YES! THIS BITCH ARRIVED TODAY AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH! It also glows red slightly when it charges. Best 40 bucks I’ve even spent! I’ve got one its literally my favorite light it’s the absolute best
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