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inquisitorhotpants: burntcopper: futureevilscientist: optimysticals: uovoc: konec0: sleepyferret: shitfacedanon: dat-soldier: sonnetscrewdriver: dat-soldier: did-you-kno: Source back the fuck up There’s another story that I like about a Chinese general who had to defend a city with only a handful of soldiers from a huge enemy horde that was in all likelihood going to steamroll the place flat within hours of showing up. So when said horde did arrive, they saw the general sitting outside the city’s open gates, drinking tea. The horde sent a couple of emissaries over to see what was what, and the general greeted them cheerfully and invited them all to come and take tea with him. The horde decided that this was a scenario that had “MASSIVE FUCKING TRAP” written all over it in beautiful calligraphy and promptly fucked off. Whoever that general was, he was clearly the Ancient Chinese equivalent of Sam Vimes. did he just invite us over for tea nah man i’m out This just keeps getting better I fucking love history. ok but tbh that story misses a lot of the subtlety of the situation like ok so this story is the Romance of Three Kingdoms, and essentially takes place between Zhuge Liang, resident tactician extraordinaire, and Sima Yi… OTHER resident tactician extraordinaire. The two were both regarded as tactical geniuses and recognized the other as their rival. Zhuge Liang had a reputation for ambushing the SHIT out of his opponents and using the environment to his advantage, thus destroying large armies with a small number of men. Sima Yi (who kind of entered the picture later) was a cautious person whose speciality was unravelling his opponent’s plans before they began. So it was natural that the two would butt heads; however, since Sima Yi tended to have more men and resources, he started winning battles against the former. Which, y’know, kinda sucked. On to the actual story: Zhuge Liang is all like “shit i gotta defend this city with like 10 men.” Literally if he fights ANY kind of battle here, he WILL lose; his only option for survival is not to fight. And that’s looking more and more impossible until he hears that his rival is leading the opposing army. And then he gets this brilliant idea. He basically opens all the gates, sends his men out in civilian clothes to sweep the streets, and sits on top of the gate drinking tea and chilling out and basically makes the whole thing out to be a trap When Sima Yi comes he’s all like “yo come on in bro” and Sima Yi is like “yeah he’s never been that obvious about his traps before. this is definitely a bluff” and he’s about to head in when he realizes wait. he knows that i think he’s bluffing. and so he gets it in his head that maybe, just MAYBE, Zhuge Liang has this cunning plan that will wipe out his army - recall that he has a pretty good handle on what his rival is capable of. And after a long period of deliberation (which is just like “he know that I know that he knows that etc.”), being the cautious man he is, SIma Yi eventually decides to turn his entire army around and leave. Zhuge Liang later points out that the plan was based specifically on the fact that he was facing his rival; if it had been anyone else, there’s no way it would have worked. A dumber or less cautious person would have simply charged in and won without breaking a sweat.  and that’s the real genius here: it was a plan formed entirely just to deceive one man, and it worked. Zhuge Liang is the most brilliant, sneaky-ass bastard in history. One time his side’s army was out of arrows, which pretty much meant they were screwed. So Zhuge Liang goes and does the logical thing, which is build a fuck ton of scarecrows and put them all on boats. Then he makes the men hide in the boats and sail them out on the river. Well, that day was super foggy (which Zhuge Liang had predicted. Did I mention he was also a freakishly accurate meteorologist?). So the enemy across the river sees a fleet of boats armed to the teeth with what appears to be half an army of men. They panic! and start firing arrows like crazy.  Zhuge Liang lets this play out for a while, then he’s like, ”Ok guys that’s enough.” They calmly turn the boats around and go back to base, where they dismantle the scarecrows and pull out all the enemy’s arrows. Zhuge Liang is legend. I love this post. It just keeps getting better. Like seriously, I would have adored learning about this in World History. If you want to see this in cinematic glory, watch Red Cliff. Especially since it makes Zhuge Liang look like this: Red Cliff is 50% bloody battles and 50% eye candy and about half of that eye-candy is due to Zhuge Liang I fully support watching Red Cliff; it’s gloriously silly entertainment during the battle scenes. Guess what just got moved to the top of my watch list?? :D : inquisitorhotpants: burntcopper: futureevilscientist: optimysticals: uovoc: konec0: sleepyferret: shitfacedanon: dat-soldier: sonnetscrewdriver: dat-soldier: did-you-kno: Source back the fuck up There’s another story that I like about a Chinese general who had to defend a city with only a handful of soldiers from a huge enemy horde that was in all likelihood going to steamroll the place flat within hours of showing up. So when said horde did arrive, they saw the general sitting outside the city’s open gates, drinking tea. The horde sent a couple of emissaries over to see what was what, and the general greeted them cheerfully and invited them all to come and take tea with him. The horde decided that this was a scenario that had “MASSIVE FUCKING TRAP” written all over it in beautiful calligraphy and promptly fucked off. Whoever that general was, he was clearly the Ancient Chinese equivalent of Sam Vimes. did he just invite us over for tea nah man i’m out This just keeps getting better I fucking love history. ok but tbh that story misses a lot of the subtlety of the situation like ok so this story is the Romance of Three Kingdoms, and essentially takes place between Zhuge Liang, resident tactician extraordinaire, and Sima Yi… OTHER resident tactician extraordinaire. The two were both regarded as tactical geniuses and recognized the other as their rival. Zhuge Liang had a reputation for ambushing the SHIT out of his opponents and using the environment to his advantage, thus destroying large armies with a small number of men. Sima Yi (who kind of entered the picture later) was a cautious person whose speciality was unravelling his opponent’s plans before they began. So it was natural that the two would butt heads; however, since Sima Yi tended to have more men and resources, he started winning battles against the former. Which, y’know, kinda sucked. On to the actual story: Zhuge Liang is all like “shit i gotta defend this city with like 10 men.” Literally if he fights ANY kind of battle here, he WILL lose; his only option for survival is not to fight. And that’s looking more and more impossible until he hears that his rival is leading the opposing army. And then he gets this brilliant idea. He basically opens all the gates, sends his men out in civilian clothes to sweep the streets, and sits on top of the gate drinking tea and chilling out and basically makes the whole thing out to be a trap When Sima Yi comes he’s all like “yo come on in bro” and Sima Yi is like “yeah he’s never been that obvious about his traps before. this is definitely a bluff” and he’s about to head in when he realizes wait. he knows that i think he’s bluffing. and so he gets it in his head that maybe, just MAYBE, Zhuge Liang has this cunning plan that will wipe out his army - recall that he has a pretty good handle on what his rival is capable of. And after a long period of deliberation (which is just like “he know that I know that he knows that etc.”), being the cautious man he is, SIma Yi eventually decides to turn his entire army around and leave. Zhuge Liang later points out that the plan was based specifically on the fact that he was facing his rival; if it had been anyone else, there’s no way it would have worked. A dumber or less cautious person would have simply charged in and won without breaking a sweat.  and that’s the real genius here: it was a plan formed entirely just to deceive one man, and it worked. Zhuge Liang is the most brilliant, sneaky-ass bastard in history. One time his side’s army was out of arrows, which pretty much meant they were screwed. So Zhuge Liang goes and does the logical thing, which is build a fuck ton of scarecrows and put them all on boats. Then he makes the men hide in the boats and sail them out on the river. Well, that day was super foggy (which Zhuge Liang had predicted. Did I mention he was also a freakishly accurate meteorologist?). So the enemy across the river sees a fleet of boats armed to the teeth with what appears to be half an army of men. They panic! and start firing arrows like crazy.  Zhuge Liang lets this play out for a while, then he’s like, ”Ok guys that’s enough.” They calmly turn the boats around and go back to base, where they dismantle the scarecrows and pull out all the enemy’s arrows. Zhuge Liang is legend. I love this post. It just keeps getting better. Like seriously, I would have adored learning about this in World History. If you want to see this in cinematic glory, watch Red Cliff. Especially since it makes Zhuge Liang look like this: Red Cliff is 50% bloody battles and 50% eye candy and about half of that eye-candy is due to Zhuge Liang I fully support watching Red Cliff; it’s gloriously silly entertainment during the battle scenes. Guess what just got moved to the top of my watch list?? :D
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tenderskeptic: vulvva: paxamericana: this man will get absolutely demolished by trump. a party that nominates him is signing up for four more years of trump. Joe Biden sucks but this is an example of his well-documented speech disorder… as someone with a (much milder and more intermittent) stutter, the amount of ableism in the comments is literally depressing. Just call him a racist capitalist and leave disability out of the conversation maybe Yeah I’m gonna stop you right there, Chief. This is a whole lot more than “a stutter”. On several occasions Biden has literally said things that were completely nonsensical, like claiming he was running for Senate and saying he was arrested in South Africa and telling people to “vote for the other Biden”, just to name a handful of instances. A stutter does not even begin to explain that shit. It’s pretty clearly dementia.: tenderskeptic: vulvva: paxamericana: this man will get absolutely demolished by trump. a party that nominates him is signing up for four more years of trump. Joe Biden sucks but this is an example of his well-documented speech disorder… as someone with a (much milder and more intermittent) stutter, the amount of ableism in the comments is literally depressing. Just call him a racist capitalist and leave disability out of the conversation maybe Yeah I’m gonna stop you right there, Chief. This is a whole lot more than “a stutter”. On several occasions Biden has literally said things that were completely nonsensical, like claiming he was running for Senate and saying he was arrested in South Africa and telling people to “vote for the other Biden”, just to name a handful of instances. A stutter does not even begin to explain that shit. It’s pretty clearly dementia.
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earthsong9405: All done with Urbosa’s redesign and the additional sketches for her role in my headcanon! <: As usual I didn’t change too much but I gave her a slightly different hairstyle, some tusks (as is natural for Gerudo in my headcanon), and a brand new outfit! She has such lovely colors to work with, I love her so much ;-;But I’m sure ya don’t wanna hear me babble about how enjoyable her design is. So, let’s go straight into the headcanon! <:————————--Urbosa is the current chief of the Gerudo and serves as the acting Champion for them as well. As a Champion in this timeline, she holds a key component in gaining access to Old Hyrule-”Champion” in this timeline doesn’t fully hold the same function as it once did in BotW. Instead of being chosen to pilot the Divine Beasts, a Champion are a handful of chosen warriors that serve as Hyrule’s best line of defense against any threat. Despite every group of peoples having their own form of governing, culture, and way of life, all of them are still united under the banner of Hyrule, and the Champions could be the physical representation of this tight alliance. A Champion may not necessarily have a lot of political power by themselves but what they represent and what they stand for still puts them in a high position in social status and therefore their word often holds significant weight. As not only the chief of Gerudo but also their Champion, Urbosa is in a position of having more power than what would typically be seen for a Chief. Thankfully though, she doesn’t abuse it and leads her people well: there’s a reason she’s so well respected and loved among not only the Gerudo, but across Hyrule as well.-As one of the original Champions, Urbosa retains many of her memories from her past life, including what ultimately led to her death-I’ve always liked the idea of Urbosa being a motherly figure to just about anyone she meets, but that also includes being an actual mother! Her kid in this headcanon is Riju <:-While Urbosa isn’t actually related to Ganondorf, he refers to her as his “aunt”. Of all the Gerudo in his life, Urbosa was a consistent presence, often visiting him and his parents at their secluded home in the middle of Korok Forest. She’d bring stories of adventure and gifts and even helped train him to be a skilled warrior, but as much as she loves the boy her visits held an alternative motive.-As a whole, no one really knows of Ganondorf’s past as being the vessel for the Demon King, but if anyone would have any idea about it it’d certainly be the Sheikah and the Gerudo. As per tradition in their culture, a newborn Gerudo must be brought forth to a shaman for examination to ensure their health and to fully proclaim their citizenship as a new member of the tribe. When Ganondorf was examined, the first thing the shaman noticed was the peculiar mark upon his chest: a birthmark in the shape of the wound that struck Demise down all those thousands of years ago. In seeing the mark the shaman took the baby away from his mother and brought it to the council and Urbosa to discuss what to do with it.The Gerudo are intimately familiar with the history surrounding the Demon King and how he stole one of their own, so the mark was very telling of what the child once was. And given the long stretch of peace Hyrule was experiencing it understandably buzzed some fear among the elder council. Many were afraid his birth meant an end to that peace, that the Demon King had somehow reincarnated once more and meant to bring hell back to Hyrule.So in response to all of this, the elders argued amongst each other about a solution. Many ruled the boy too dangerous to allow him to grow older and demanded he be… dealt with. Others deemed that too cruel, even for a damned child, and suggested they simply leave him somewhere far away: let nature decide if he lives or dies. But, as chief and Gerudo Champion of Hyrule, it ultimately came down to Urbosa’s choice. She held the babe her council hissed demon, stared at the birthmark that marked him as a vessel, heard the pleading sobs of the boy’s mother over the whispers of “we’ll make it quick, but we mustn’t let him live”, “he is dangerous, he will bring doom to us all” “end it now while he is weak”.Stared at the supposed demon child, who simply yawned in her grasp and blinked up at her with innocent, yellow eyes. She met the Demon King once: she had stared into that monster’s eyes while she fought it to her death in her past lifetime. She knows soulless eyes when she sees them… and this baby didn’t have those eyes.So Urbosa made her decision: the boy will not die. It was largely met with disbelief and anger: you will doom us all! they said. Despite Urbosa staying firm in her decision, it took her days of arguing with the council and the aid of a Sheikah Seer (who examined the child themselves and confirmed that he didn’t house the Demon King) to finally reach a compromise: the boy will live, but he can’t live among the Gerudo. He had to live with his mother in exile, and his growth had to be monitored as a precaution. The monitoring came in the form of Urbosa’s frequent visits.-Urbosa is close friends with Zelda’s parents and is also something of an “aunt” figure to Zelda as well; Zelda absolutely adores Urbosa and even sees her as more of a secondary mother figure than anything.————————————Aaaaaaaaand that’s all I have for Urbosa for now! If I think of anything else I’ll be sure to add more, and of course if ya have questions you’re more than free to ask them. <: Otherwise I hope you enjoy! ^.^: earthsong9405: All done with Urbosa’s redesign and the additional sketches for her role in my headcanon! <: As usual I didn’t change too much but I gave her a slightly different hairstyle, some tusks (as is natural for Gerudo in my headcanon), and a brand new outfit! She has such lovely colors to work with, I love her so much ;-;But I’m sure ya don’t wanna hear me babble about how enjoyable her design is. So, let’s go straight into the headcanon! <:————————--Urbosa is the current chief of the Gerudo and serves as the acting Champion for them as well. As a Champion in this timeline, she holds a key component in gaining access to Old Hyrule-”Champion” in this timeline doesn’t fully hold the same function as it once did in BotW. Instead of being chosen to pilot the Divine Beasts, a Champion are a handful of chosen warriors that serve as Hyrule’s best line of defense against any threat. Despite every group of peoples having their own form of governing, culture, and way of life, all of them are still united under the banner of Hyrule, and the Champions could be the physical representation of this tight alliance. A Champion may not necessarily have a lot of political power by themselves but what they represent and what they stand for still puts them in a high position in social status and therefore their word often holds significant weight. As not only the chief of Gerudo but also their Champion, Urbosa is in a position of having more power than what would typically be seen for a Chief. Thankfully though, she doesn’t abuse it and leads her people well: there’s a reason she’s so well respected and loved among not only the Gerudo, but across Hyrule as well.-As one of the original Champions, Urbosa retains many of her memories from her past life, including what ultimately led to her death-I’ve always liked the idea of Urbosa being a motherly figure to just about anyone she meets, but that also includes being an actual mother! Her kid in this headcanon is Riju <:-While Urbosa isn’t actually related to Ganondorf, he refers to her as his “aunt”. Of all the Gerudo in his life, Urbosa was a consistent presence, often visiting him and his parents at their secluded home in the middle of Korok Forest. She’d bring stories of adventure and gifts and even helped train him to be a skilled warrior, but as much as she loves the boy her visits held an alternative motive.-As a whole, no one really knows of Ganondorf’s past as being the vessel for the Demon King, but if anyone would have any idea about it it’d certainly be the Sheikah and the Gerudo. As per tradition in their culture, a newborn Gerudo must be brought forth to a shaman for examination to ensure their health and to fully proclaim their citizenship as a new member of the tribe. When Ganondorf was examined, the first thing the shaman noticed was the peculiar mark upon his chest: a birthmark in the shape of the wound that struck Demise down all those thousands of years ago. In seeing the mark the shaman took the baby away from his mother and brought it to the council and Urbosa to discuss what to do with it.The Gerudo are intimately familiar with the history surrounding the Demon King and how he stole one of their own, so the mark was very telling of what the child once was. And given the long stretch of peace Hyrule was experiencing it understandably buzzed some fear among the elder council. Many were afraid his birth meant an end to that peace, that the Demon King had somehow reincarnated once more and meant to bring hell back to Hyrule.So in response to all of this, the elders argued amongst each other about a solution. Many ruled the boy too dangerous to allow him to grow older and demanded he be… dealt with. Others deemed that too cruel, even for a damned child, and suggested they simply leave him somewhere far away: let nature decide if he lives or dies. But, as chief and Gerudo Champion of Hyrule, it ultimately came down to Urbosa’s choice. She held the babe her council hissed demon, stared at the birthmark that marked him as a vessel, heard the pleading sobs of the boy’s mother over the whispers of “we’ll make it quick, but we mustn’t let him live”, “he is dangerous, he will bring doom to us all” “end it now while he is weak”.Stared at the supposed demon child, who simply yawned in her grasp and blinked up at her with innocent, yellow eyes. She met the Demon King once: she had stared into that monster’s eyes while she fought it to her death in her past lifetime. She knows soulless eyes when she sees them… and this baby didn’t have those eyes.So Urbosa made her decision: the boy will not die. It was largely met with disbelief and anger: you will doom us all! they said. Despite Urbosa staying firm in her decision, it took her days of arguing with the council and the aid of a Sheikah Seer (who examined the child themselves and confirmed that he didn’t house the Demon King) to finally reach a compromise: the boy will live, but he can’t live among the Gerudo. He had to live with his mother in exile, and his growth had to be monitored as a precaution. The monitoring came in the form of Urbosa’s frequent visits.-Urbosa is close friends with Zelda’s parents and is also something of an “aunt” figure to Zelda as well; Zelda absolutely adores Urbosa and even sees her as more of a secondary mother figure than anything.————————————Aaaaaaaaand that’s all I have for Urbosa for now! If I think of anything else I’ll be sure to add more, and of course if ya have questions you’re more than free to ask them. <: Otherwise I hope you enjoy! ^.^

earthsong9405: All done with Urbosa’s redesign and the additional sketches for her role in my headcanon! <: As usual I didn’t change too...

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northstarfan: i-am-corbin-dallas: boxlunches: kinkyconcepts: bolinator: djazzy: ximune: did-you-kno: Source I saw a news report about this on T.V., she was a straight A Student who had perfect attendance and everything. Everyone loved and respected her for her skills, but when she started this experiment and people thought she was pregnant, they started treating her like garbage. Even her teachers started looking down on her like she was scum of the earth. The only people who knew she was doing this as an experiment were her school principal, her health care teacher, her boyfriend, and her mother. Her own siblings thought she was pregnant!I mean even her friends turned on her, it was horrid. Very very sad, and as soon as she revealed during an assembly that the pregnancy was false, a lot of people were in shock as she brought up all the horrible things they said and did to her because they thought she was pregnant.The reason for the experiment was to see how people would react and treat her if they thought she was pregnant, as opposed as to treating her as the straight A “Perfect” student they usually did. And it proved that people were horrible scumbags to her as soon as they thought she was. holy shit. this is fucking awesome I read this chick’s book! It was so cool. Her book is The Pregnancy Project by Gaby Rodriguez Pretty sure I reblogged something about this in the past, but now someone’s posted a book title and I want to read this book I read the book and saw the lifetime movie ***SPOILERS***  She came from a family with a history of teen pregnancies but she was the exception to the rule. As her senior project she wanted to see how things would change for her if she “succumbed” to what was expected of her by society and statistics. basically she told her bf for his permission and one or two school officials (I think her sister or mother as well but I read it soo long ago). The teachers who didn’t know immediately began to look down on her, most of her friends abandoned her. He bf's family told him to leave her and she basically became the school outcast. Only the other pregnant girls were friendly to her. At the end of the school year she made a big presentation to the school giving them facts about teen pregnancy and telling them about her experiences as a pregnant teen including things they had said to or about her. Then she finally revealed that she wasn’t pregnant. Some people were mad that she had tricked them but overall they understood why she had done it. Assholes weren’t mad that she tricked them, they were mad because she exposed them for what they really were: a pack of shitheads.: did you know? did-you-kno.tumblr.co A 17 year old girl faked a pregnancy for 6 months as a social experiment with only a handful of people knowing about it. Rumor Stereot ASSOCIATED PRESS did-you-kno.tumblr.com northstarfan: i-am-corbin-dallas: boxlunches: kinkyconcepts: bolinator: djazzy: ximune: did-you-kno: Source I saw a news report about this on T.V., she was a straight A Student who had perfect attendance and everything. Everyone loved and respected her for her skills, but when she started this experiment and people thought she was pregnant, they started treating her like garbage. Even her teachers started looking down on her like she was scum of the earth. The only people who knew she was doing this as an experiment were her school principal, her health care teacher, her boyfriend, and her mother. Her own siblings thought she was pregnant!I mean even her friends turned on her, it was horrid. Very very sad, and as soon as she revealed during an assembly that the pregnancy was false, a lot of people were in shock as she brought up all the horrible things they said and did to her because they thought she was pregnant.The reason for the experiment was to see how people would react and treat her if they thought she was pregnant, as opposed as to treating her as the straight A “Perfect” student they usually did. And it proved that people were horrible scumbags to her as soon as they thought she was. holy shit. this is fucking awesome I read this chick’s book! It was so cool. Her book is The Pregnancy Project by Gaby Rodriguez Pretty sure I reblogged something about this in the past, but now someone’s posted a book title and I want to read this book I read the book and saw the lifetime movie ***SPOILERS***  She came from a family with a history of teen pregnancies but she was the exception to the rule. As her senior project she wanted to see how things would change for her if she “succumbed” to what was expected of her by society and statistics. basically she told her bf for his permission and one or two school officials (I think her sister or mother as well but I read it soo long ago). The teachers who didn’t know immediately began to look down on her, most of her friends abandoned her. He bf's family told him to leave her and she basically became the school outcast. Only the other pregnant girls were friendly to her. At the end of the school year she made a big presentation to the school giving them facts about teen pregnancy and telling them about her experiences as a pregnant teen including things they had said to or about her. Then she finally revealed that she wasn’t pregnant. Some people were mad that she had tricked them but overall they understood why she had done it. Assholes weren’t mad that she tricked them, they were mad because she exposed them for what they really were: a pack of shitheads.
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reddie-fucked-me-up: Art by the beautiful @koryandr, who listened to my idea in our Reddie Discord Server, blessed my fucking seeing globes with THIS beautiful sketch, and inspired me to write a little more <3The news broke overnight: Old tweets expose comedian Richie Tozier as homophobe.There was a huge “#CancelRichieTozier” party, of course. When isn’t there? A small handful of celebrities sounded off about their disapproval, a bunch of old haters flooded his comment sections of every social media account, and even a few fans spoke out, condemning him for it and shaming themselves for not “knowing something was up with him”.If you asked Richie, the only thing they should be shaming themselves for was telling a cock sucker he was homophobic for joking about other cock suckers on the internet five years ago, but hey. Who was he to judge?Now, normally Richie would have loved to jump on the scandal. Hell, he’d probably be right there along with his haters, insisting he have the most Extra™ of cancellation parties. Unfortunately though, he happened to be sleeping when the “receipts” surfaced. It wasn’t until he awoke, bleary eyed and exhausted, that he knew anything was amiss— the sheer amount of notifications on his phone being enough to scare anyone.Especially the five missed calls from his agent.“Oh fuck me,” He groaned, falling back against the pillows once more. Eddie was right there, pushing back into his space and nuzzling his face into Richie’s shoulder in a lazy attempt to block out the light.If Richie took a moment or two to stare before turning his attention once more to the shit storm on his phone, who could blame him?He scrolled through notification after notification, mind still rather numb from the early morning, but smiling nonetheless. I mean, how could he not, this shit was hilarious! Sure, he probably should’ve been calling his agent back, but instead he raised his phone in the air, snapping a quick shot of him and his fiancé to sent to their friends.It was maybe the best picture he’d ever taken.Growing up in a town as close-minded as Derry, Richie and Eddie were just a couple of the many who were raised to believe being gay was wrong. Richie grew up desperate to believe he was anything else (well, technically he was bisexual, but that was besides the point), and Eddie grew up believing he was inherently dirty.Eventually, they found a home in each other, but it had taken some time. They didn’t know how to allow themselves to be intimate, and there were a lot of stumbles. Just as there always is with your first love. Except, that “first love” was going to be their only love. Richie had made it official weeks ago. He liked it, and he finally, finally put a ring on it. He just… hadn’t gone public with it yet.Eddie didn’t mind. They were both still far more uncomfortable with public displays of affection than they’d care to admit. You could be run out of an arcade is someone thought you were so much as flirting with a guy. That kind of hardwiring took time to change.Well… looking at this photo— at the way their bodies could just exist together— Richie started to wonder if his hardwire wasn’t glitching. He just couldn’t get the math to work. Why would this ever be something he didn’t want to share? The way Eddie could just close his eyes and mold himself against Richie’s entire body, trusting him with this… this precious thing he was. This thing that probably should’ve belonged to someone more deserving, but he gave to Richie.With one last tired smile at the photo, Richie decided to do what he does best:Not think.It was a little difficult typing with one shoulder pinned under Eddie, but he managed fine enough, typing his official response to all the drama.“Wow. Tough blow, this Richie Tozier news. My fiancé here was a fan. I hope he doesn’t take it too hard #CancelRichieTozier #BlowMe”: Trashmouth Your Mom > 345,987 likes Trashmouth Wow. Tough blow, this Richie Tozier news. My fiance here was a fan. I hope he doesn't take it too hard #CancelRichieTozier #BlowMe BevvieMarshHoly Shit, Rich SummerKid324 Plot Twist view all 12,243 comments reddie-fucked-me-up: Art by the beautiful @koryandr, who listened to my idea in our Reddie Discord Server, blessed my fucking seeing globes with THIS beautiful sketch, and inspired me to write a little more <3The news broke overnight: Old tweets expose comedian Richie Tozier as homophobe.There was a huge “#CancelRichieTozier” party, of course. When isn’t there? A small handful of celebrities sounded off about their disapproval, a bunch of old haters flooded his comment sections of every social media account, and even a few fans spoke out, condemning him for it and shaming themselves for not “knowing something was up with him”.If you asked Richie, the only thing they should be shaming themselves for was telling a cock sucker he was homophobic for joking about other cock suckers on the internet five years ago, but hey. Who was he to judge?Now, normally Richie would have loved to jump on the scandal. Hell, he’d probably be right there along with his haters, insisting he have the most Extra™ of cancellation parties. Unfortunately though, he happened to be sleeping when the “receipts” surfaced. It wasn’t until he awoke, bleary eyed and exhausted, that he knew anything was amiss— the sheer amount of notifications on his phone being enough to scare anyone.Especially the five missed calls from his agent.“Oh fuck me,” He groaned, falling back against the pillows once more. Eddie was right there, pushing back into his space and nuzzling his face into Richie’s shoulder in a lazy attempt to block out the light.If Richie took a moment or two to stare before turning his attention once more to the shit storm on his phone, who could blame him?He scrolled through notification after notification, mind still rather numb from the early morning, but smiling nonetheless. I mean, how could he not, this shit was hilarious! Sure, he probably should’ve been calling his agent back, but instead he raised his phone in the air, snapping a quick shot of him and his fiancé to sent to their friends.It was maybe the best picture he’d ever taken.Growing up in a town as close-minded as Derry, Richie and Eddie were just a couple of the many who were raised to believe being gay was wrong. Richie grew up desperate to believe he was anything else (well, technically he was bisexual, but that was besides the point), and Eddie grew up believing he was inherently dirty.Eventually, they found a home in each other, but it had taken some time. They didn’t know how to allow themselves to be intimate, and there were a lot of stumbles. Just as there always is with your first love. Except, that “first love” was going to be their only love. Richie had made it official weeks ago. He liked it, and he finally, finally put a ring on it. He just… hadn’t gone public with it yet.Eddie didn’t mind. They were both still far more uncomfortable with public displays of affection than they’d care to admit. You could be run out of an arcade is someone thought you were so much as flirting with a guy. That kind of hardwiring took time to change.Well… looking at this photo— at the way their bodies could just exist together— Richie started to wonder if his hardwire wasn’t glitching. He just couldn’t get the math to work. Why would this ever be something he didn’t want to share? The way Eddie could just close his eyes and mold himself against Richie’s entire body, trusting him with this… this precious thing he was. This thing that probably should’ve belonged to someone more deserving, but he gave to Richie.With one last tired smile at the photo, Richie decided to do what he does best:Not think.It was a little difficult typing with one shoulder pinned under Eddie, but he managed fine enough, typing his official response to all the drama.“Wow. Tough blow, this Richie Tozier news. My fiancé here was a fan. I hope he doesn’t take it too hard #CancelRichieTozier #BlowMe”
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woodle-dee-doodle: eryn-n-g: capt-emmett: pixie-mage: riningear: italiyeah: tonyswirl: ineffable-hufflepuff: misandryevans: babymarkers: the-chocolate-chip-pancake: thatsnotwatyourmomsaid: none pizza with left beef It should be a rule of Tumblr to always reblog none pizza with left beef ive missed you #THIS IS MY FAVORITE FUCKING THING JUST THE BEEF#YOU COULD TELL THE POOR CHEF WAS JUST FUCKING#DISGUSTED#WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS#WHAT THE F U C K IS THIS#WHO THE FUCK ORDERS A#A /NONE/ PIZZA?? JUST BEEF ON THE LEFT???#FUCK IT#F U CK IT#JUST COOK THE FUCKING DOUGH#HERE LET ME THROW THIS FUCKING HANDFUL OF OBLONG BEEF CHUNKS AT YOUR NONE FUCKING PIZZA#FUCK YOU#FUCK YOU AND ALL YOU STAND FOR#LEFT FUCKING BEEF (via askscientistcarlos) I love None Pizza with Left Beef. 3th time i’ve reblogged this 3th tumblr people love this. reddit people love this. 4chan scum loves this. there is just something intrinsically hilarious about none pizza with left beef. bless  I hope this never dies. I hope None Pizza with Left Beef will go down in Internet history alongside such legends as the Rickroll and He-Man’s rendition of “What’s Going On”. YES NONE PIZZA WITH THE LEFT BEEF NONE PIZZA WITH LEFT BEEF NONE PIZZA WITH LEFT BEEF : Choose Toppings Toppings Cheese WHOLE LEFT RIGHT NONE AMOUNT Sauce Pepperoni Extra Large Pepperon Italian Sausage Green Peppers Black Olives Pineapple Mushrooms Onions Beef Normal Bacon Anchovies ze.com woodle-dee-doodle: eryn-n-g: capt-emmett: pixie-mage: riningear: italiyeah: tonyswirl: ineffable-hufflepuff: misandryevans: babymarkers: the-chocolate-chip-pancake: thatsnotwatyourmomsaid: none pizza with left beef It should be a rule of Tumblr to always reblog none pizza with left beef ive missed you #THIS IS MY FAVORITE FUCKING THING JUST THE BEEF#YOU COULD TELL THE POOR CHEF WAS JUST FUCKING#DISGUSTED#WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS#WHAT THE F U C K IS THIS#WHO THE FUCK ORDERS A#A /NONE/ PIZZA?? JUST BEEF ON THE LEFT???#FUCK IT#F U CK IT#JUST COOK THE FUCKING DOUGH#HERE LET ME THROW THIS FUCKING HANDFUL OF OBLONG BEEF CHUNKS AT YOUR NONE FUCKING PIZZA#FUCK YOU#FUCK YOU AND ALL YOU STAND FOR#LEFT FUCKING BEEF (via askscientistcarlos) I love None Pizza with Left Beef. 3th time i’ve reblogged this 3th tumblr people love this. reddit people love this. 4chan scum loves this. there is just something intrinsically hilarious about none pizza with left beef. bless  I hope this never dies. I hope None Pizza with Left Beef will go down in Internet history alongside such legends as the Rickroll and He-Man’s rendition of “What’s Going On”. YES NONE PIZZA WITH THE LEFT BEEF NONE PIZZA WITH LEFT BEEF NONE PIZZA WITH LEFT BEEF
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thejorie: xilast-zurvifferman: thejorie: jackbecq: thejorie: 19leahjade96: thejorie: madamekagamine: thejorie: gccgrimm: thejorie: gucciballs: thejorie: peble: thejorie: My three girlfriends.And yes, they smoke weed. do they smoke weed? Yes, actually. you mean she isnt just smoking a cigarette? but a weed cigarette? It’s called a bunt…. Not weed cigarette… And yes, it is a weed bunt. They all smoke weed bunts before we kiss. (They are my girlfriends,) They don’t look like they smoke weed. Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.I’m so angry you are so lucky my three weed smorking girlfriends are rubbing my shoulders to calm me down I’m so mad. Your “weed smoking girlfriend” has a Hello Kitty tattoo on her belly. The one in the middle. I printed out a photo of your avatar and taped it to my punching bag that I punch and I mutter your URL with every strong punch I punch you twerp…. Don’t ever Talk about Blaiz or the wicked Tat(tattoo) I drew on her ever again I Don’t wanna see you standing outside my home at 3 am holding your weird dripping brown bags ever again ok leave us alone this is the FINAL FUCKING WARNING  Well that escalated quickly…… What, was that? Hmm? Come again. *Blaiz grabs my shoulder* Come on Jory, they aren’t worth it, please. * I jerk my shoulder shaking her hand off* NO! NOOOOO!!! *starts to just pummel you with my big fucking fists. With each blow I let out a furious yell. The blows come quicker and harder and the yells get louder. I’m yelling so loud and now I’m crying. BREAKING POINT. The week was hard and I can’t take anymore. I’m opening sobbing at this point while you blood gurgle. All three of my girlfriends struggle to pull me off and they finally succeed and lead me away from the goo pile that is now your body* haha oh my god who even is this dude? someone needs some anger management classes. love how he keeps reminding us that “I HAVE THREE GIRLFRIENDS”, “THEY ALL KISS ME”, and “THEY SMOKE WEED HURRP DURR”. and let’s not forget the “Blaiz” and her “wicked tat”, or that he doesn’t “wanna see you standing outside [his] home at 3 am holding your weird dripping brown bags ever again”, and that this is “the FINAL FUCKING WARNING”. “the goo pile that is now your body” i’m dying over here, jesus please, Jory, come challenge me to a bout of internet witticsisms; i promise, it’ll be fun. *shoots you dead* Heh, idiot…*leaves with my three weed smorking girlfriends to go hold hands and kiss.* this dude playin omg  Come again? *The bar falls silent. No one dares to make a sound, as you have just said a very poor choice of words at a very dangerous time. I remain slumped over the bar, not looking back to you. One hand limply holding an almost empty bottle, the other hand cradling my head. I repeat the question, this time louder.* Come again?! *You can hear me slur the words, the sentence sounds like a real struggle for me to get out. I’m clearly intoxicated. A bead of sweat rolls down your face as you realize you might have just fucked up in a very major way. Everyone else in the bar is pretending to not notice what is going on. The bartender idly washes a mug with a cloth. His eyes are closed and he’s muttering something to himself. A handful of people hurriedly leave. One person looks back at you, a look of sorrow on their face. They almost say something, but shake their head and cast their eyes down to the floor, and leave. But not you. You stand, petrified. A quick look at me reveals I’m still  at the bar. You look to the exit, there’s still time. But there’s not, there’s not, there’s not. Your fate was sealed the moment you opened your mouth.* Mother fuck.. what did you say?! *I slowly rise from my stool and being to lumber over to you.  I look a mess. My hair is unkempt, I haven’t shaved in what looks like months, there are dark heavy bags under my eyes, my shirt is stained and has holes in it, and I’m missing a shoe. But the main thing you notice is the gun tucked into my jeans, and my massive muscle arms that look like they were made for punching. You know that song about the boots that were made for walking? Yeah, it’s like that only instead of boots it’s my muscles and instead of walking it’s punching. As I drunkenly sway over to you, you think of your family… Will they mourn you, or will they try and forget this blotch of stupidity, that their child insulted the Jory publicly, ever happened to their family? Your thoughts are cut short as I now stand face to face with you. I grab your face and pull you even closer.* Playin?! There was nothing playing… no playing you fuck. No playing… it was real.. the realest thing I’ve ever know.. felt… Love. I loved them… Blaiz…. Chas-Chas… Funk… I loved all three of em… but they…*My face is wet with tears and I’m blinking constantly in vain to hold them back.* They left me… left… *Almost instantly the sadness leaves my face and is replaced with pure anger.* Playin? Playin?! *My hand leaves your face and starts to head to what you think is the gun. You close your eyes and see God looking at you, shrugging. ‘Pft, you brought this upon yourself dude.’ He says as he waves his hands at you dismissively. But instead of the gun, my hands grab yours. Your eyes jolt open and the anger is gone from my face. There is only sadness.* Left me… * I fall to the floor and sob.*Wow, grow up. *You say before you leave the bar but are hit almost immediately from a car and are killed upon impact.* : thejorie: xilast-zurvifferman: thejorie: jackbecq: thejorie: 19leahjade96: thejorie: madamekagamine: thejorie: gccgrimm: thejorie: gucciballs: thejorie: peble: thejorie: My three girlfriends.And yes, they smoke weed. do they smoke weed? Yes, actually. you mean she isnt just smoking a cigarette? but a weed cigarette? It’s called a bunt…. Not weed cigarette… And yes, it is a weed bunt. They all smoke weed bunts before we kiss. (They are my girlfriends,) They don’t look like they smoke weed. Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.Fuck You.I’m so angry you are so lucky my three weed smorking girlfriends are rubbing my shoulders to calm me down I’m so mad. Your “weed smoking girlfriend” has a Hello Kitty tattoo on her belly. The one in the middle. I printed out a photo of your avatar and taped it to my punching bag that I punch and I mutter your URL with every strong punch I punch you twerp…. Don’t ever Talk about Blaiz or the wicked Tat(tattoo) I drew on her ever again I Don’t wanna see you standing outside my home at 3 am holding your weird dripping brown bags ever again ok leave us alone this is the FINAL FUCKING WARNING  Well that escalated quickly…… What, was that? Hmm? Come again. *Blaiz grabs my shoulder* Come on Jory, they aren’t worth it, please. * I jerk my shoulder shaking her hand off* NO! NOOOOO!!! *starts to just pummel you with my big fucking fists. With each blow I let out a furious yell. The blows come quicker and harder and the yells get louder. I’m yelling so loud and now I’m crying. BREAKING POINT. The week was hard and I can’t take anymore. I’m opening sobbing at this point while you blood gurgle. All three of my girlfriends struggle to pull me off and they finally succeed and lead me away from the goo pile that is now your body* haha oh my god who even is this dude? someone needs some anger management classes. love how he keeps reminding us that “I HAVE THREE GIRLFRIENDS”, “THEY ALL KISS ME”, and “THEY SMOKE WEED HURRP DURR”. and let’s not forget the “Blaiz” and her “wicked tat”, or that he doesn’t “wanna see you standing outside [his] home at 3 am holding your weird dripping brown bags ever again”, and that this is “the FINAL FUCKING WARNING”. “the goo pile that is now your body” i’m dying over here, jesus please, Jory, come challenge me to a bout of internet witticsisms; i promise, it’ll be fun. *shoots you dead* Heh, idiot…*leaves with my three weed smorking girlfriends to go hold hands and kiss.* this dude playin omg  Come again? *The bar falls silent. No one dares to make a sound, as you have just said a very poor choice of words at a very dangerous time. I remain slumped over the bar, not looking back to you. One hand limply holding an almost empty bottle, the other hand cradling my head. I repeat the question, this time louder.* Come again?! *You can hear me slur the words, the sentence sounds like a real struggle for me to get out. I’m clearly intoxicated. A bead of sweat rolls down your face as you realize you might have just fucked up in a very major way. Everyone else in the bar is pretending to not notice what is going on. The bartender idly washes a mug with a cloth. His eyes are closed and he’s muttering something to himself. A handful of people hurriedly leave. One person looks back at you, a look of sorrow on their face. They almost say something, but shake their head and cast their eyes down to the floor, and leave. But not you. You stand, petrified. A quick look at me reveals I’m still  at the bar. You look to the exit, there’s still time. But there’s not, there’s not, there’s not. Your fate was sealed the moment you opened your mouth.* Mother fuck.. what did you say?! *I slowly rise from my stool and being to lumber over to you.  I look a mess. My hair is unkempt, I haven’t shaved in what looks like months, there are dark heavy bags under my eyes, my shirt is stained and has holes in it, and I’m missing a shoe. But the main thing you notice is the gun tucked into my jeans, and my massive muscle arms that look like they were made for punching. You know that song about the boots that were made for walking? Yeah, it’s like that only instead of boots it’s my muscles and instead of walking it’s punching. As I drunkenly sway over to you, you think of your family… Will they mourn you, or will they try and forget this blotch of stupidity, that their child insulted the Jory publicly, ever happened to their family? Your thoughts are cut short as I now stand face to face with you. I grab your face and pull you even closer.* Playin?! There was nothing playing… no playing you fuck. No playing… it was real.. the realest thing I’ve ever know.. felt… Love. I loved them… Blaiz…. Chas-Chas… Funk… I loved all three of em… but they…*My face is wet with tears and I’m blinking constantly in vain to hold them back.* They left me… left… *Almost instantly the sadness leaves my face and is replaced with pure anger.* Playin? Playin?! *My hand leaves your face and starts to head to what you think is the gun. You close your eyes and see God looking at you, shrugging. ‘Pft, you brought this upon yourself dude.’ He says as he waves his hands at you dismissively. But instead of the gun, my hands grab yours. Your eyes jolt open and the anger is gone from my face. There is only sadness.* Left me… * I fall to the floor and sob.*Wow, grow up. *You say before you leave the bar but are hit almost immediately from a car and are killed upon impact.*
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ladydiscomfortlover: godloveyell: thatpettyblackgirl: Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free should be overthrown And assuming that this DIY one is perfectly capable, if an acceptable one can be slapped together with parts found at the local Home Depot, maybe we need to ask why insurance corporations are charging so much for one in the first place. Once we no longer have to support a handful of parasitic billionaires, medical costs would drop greatly. Kill the Rich : FOX FOX 5 DC 5 @fox5dc THIS IS AWESOME! Two-year-old Logan Moore needs a walker to get around but his family didn't know if insurance would cover for one, so his local Home Depot found parts to make it themselves. MORE: bit.ly/2YTichw 10:33 AM May 28, 2019 from Washington, DC Twitter Web Client 15.6K Likes 2.6K Retweets Abbi Brown @AbbiSigns To be clear: a disabled child having to use a makeshift walker built out of cheap DIY materials instead of an appropriate walking aid designed and fitted by qualified medical professionals is not awesome. It's a travesty FOX @fox5dc May 28 5 FOX 5 DС THIS IS AWESOME! Two-year-old Logan Moore needs a walker to get around but his family didn't know if insurance would cover for one, so his local Home Depot found parts to make it themselves. MORE: bit.ly/2YTichw 8:49 AM May 29, 2019 Twitter for iPhone 28.5K Likes 8.5K Retweets ladydiscomfortlover: godloveyell: thatpettyblackgirl: Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free should be overthrown And assuming that this DIY one is perfectly capable, if an acceptable one can be slapped together with parts found at the local Home Depot, maybe we need to ask why insurance corporations are charging so much for one in the first place. Once we no longer have to support a handful of parasitic billionaires, medical costs would drop greatly. Kill the Rich

ladydiscomfortlover: godloveyell: thatpettyblackgirl: Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free shoul...

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herbwicc: plantanarchy: herbwicc: viking-illustrator: darkwolfwitch: witt-craft: Runes! This was an assignment to create a set of flashcards that would appeal to kids and adults for my Type 1 class. They each have the rune symbol, the name of the rune, the meaning in English, the meaning (roughly translated by google, thanks google) in Norwegian, and a little icon I made. I made the big rune characters, but the display font is Comic Runes by takuminokami on Font Space (thanks internet). The cards are 3 inches by 4.5 inches.  Also please don’t yell at me if the meanings of these are wrong, my research was not particularly scholarly. (Once again, thanks internet :p)  Sweet, what a nifty little guide This is such a cool idea! Awesome! Quick question: are runes part of a closed culture? No, these runes here are the Elder Futhark, used as a writing system in the area that would be Scandinavia/Northern Germanic region. The names are Proto-Germanic reconstructions, so yeah, the culture that used these are very very dead. Similar runes were used by the Anglo-Saxons and the Vikings (the Anglo-Saxons added a bunch of runes and the Vikings used less runes and some different ones and this was centuries later). The reason we know the “meanings” and names of the runes at all is because of a handful of rune poems that were initially used as mnemonic devices to remember them. The actual system of divination and magic via Elder Futhark runes is very modern and goes back to ~the 60s I believe? There’s some archeological evidence that runes may have been used for more than just a writing system, and the Havamal (old important morality poem for heathens) mentions that Odin hung on the world tree and sacrificed himself to himself and returned with knowledge of the runes. It also discusses that runes can be used for magic (though it doesn’t get into which runes or how to do the magic).So, to me personally, it does seem a bit weird to use the runes as just another divination tool without using them in context of the spiritual/religious paradigm they are connected to, but there are a lot of people that do and seem to have success with it. And I’d be cautious with getting into using them unless you’re willing to suddenly have Northern Germanic gods busting down your door whether you like it or not. Though feeling a pull toward the runes in general may mean they already have you. Good to know, thank you :) : KNOW YOLR RUNES U IS FOR LIS FOR URUZ LAGUZ HEALTH, STRENGTH, WATER BIRTH VIGOR & HEALING BIRTH 0F A VENTURE OR PHYSICAL BIRTH VANN STRYKE, HELSE FODSEL RUNE 2 of 12 RUNE 1 of 12 TIS FOR K IS FOR KENNZ FIRE, PH YSICAL ICE, TIME OF RESPITE PASSION OR STAGN ATION LIDENSKAP BRANN ICE PUSTEROM RUNE 3 12 RUNE 4 of 12 S IS FOR O IS FOR OTHNLN VICTORY, SUCCESS ANCESTRAL LAND, HOME, FAMILY UNITY OF AN ENDEAVOR BARNDOSHJEM, SEIER TRIUMPF FAMILIENS ENHET RUNE 6 of 12 RUNE 5 of 12 E IS FOR D IS FOR Y EVHNZ DNGNZ PROTECTION ABSOLUTE BALANCE FROM EVIL BETWEEN OPPOSITE S, PARARDOX BESKYTTELSE BALANSERE RUNE 8 of 12 RUNE 7 of 12 T IS FOR P IS FOR TWNZ PETHRO JUSTICE FATE DESTINY RETTFERDIGHET SK JEBNE, FORSYN GUDDOMMELIG RUNE 10 of 12 RUNE 9 of 12 G IS FOR N IS FOR NNUD1Z KEBO GIFTS NEED DESIRE BORN WITH OR GIVEN TRENGER ONSKE GAVE, MEDFØDTE RUNE 12 af 12 RUNE 11 of 12 X herbwicc: plantanarchy: herbwicc: viking-illustrator: darkwolfwitch: witt-craft: Runes! This was an assignment to create a set of flashcards that would appeal to kids and adults for my Type 1 class. They each have the rune symbol, the name of the rune, the meaning in English, the meaning (roughly translated by google, thanks google) in Norwegian, and a little icon I made. I made the big rune characters, but the display font is Comic Runes by takuminokami on Font Space (thanks internet). The cards are 3 inches by 4.5 inches.  Also please don’t yell at me if the meanings of these are wrong, my research was not particularly scholarly. (Once again, thanks internet :p)  Sweet, what a nifty little guide This is such a cool idea! Awesome! Quick question: are runes part of a closed culture? No, these runes here are the Elder Futhark, used as a writing system in the area that would be Scandinavia/Northern Germanic region. The names are Proto-Germanic reconstructions, so yeah, the culture that used these are very very dead. Similar runes were used by the Anglo-Saxons and the Vikings (the Anglo-Saxons added a bunch of runes and the Vikings used less runes and some different ones and this was centuries later). The reason we know the “meanings” and names of the runes at all is because of a handful of rune poems that were initially used as mnemonic devices to remember them. The actual system of divination and magic via Elder Futhark runes is very modern and goes back to ~the 60s I believe? There’s some archeological evidence that runes may have been used for more than just a writing system, and the Havamal (old important morality poem for heathens) mentions that Odin hung on the world tree and sacrificed himself to himself and returned with knowledge of the runes. It also discusses that runes can be used for magic (though it doesn’t get into which runes or how to do the magic).So, to me personally, it does seem a bit weird to use the runes as just another divination tool without using them in context of the spiritual/religious paradigm they are connected to, but there are a lot of people that do and seem to have success with it. And I’d be cautious with getting into using them unless you’re willing to suddenly have Northern Germanic gods busting down your door whether you like it or not. Though feeling a pull toward the runes in general may mean they already have you. Good to know, thank you :)

herbwicc: plantanarchy: herbwicc: viking-illustrator: darkwolfwitch: witt-craft: Runes! This was an assignment to create a set of fl...

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Best description of sugar scrub ever.: vialsofbrightforgettingpowders ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR NOTEPAD THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE FUCKERS YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A NEWBORN sO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH. NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITHA BUBBLE BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS WORKING NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS CLASS DISMISSED of only they taught beauty class like this Best description of sugar scrub ever.
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arctic-hands: swan2swan: swan2swan: If you haven’t seen this story, look up his name: Francisco Galicia.  Expect to see him come 2020, when the debates begin and the political battle heats up. Expect to see him in a suit testifying in court, or before Congress. This young man is a witness and a victim, and the fact that this isn’t a more prominent story on every news station is what truly frightens me. From The Dallas News: Galicia says he lost 26 pounds during that time in a South Texas immigrant detention center because officers didn’t provide him with enough food. He said he wasn’t allowed to shower and his skin was dry and dirty. He and 60 other men were crammed into an overcrowded holding area where they slept on the floor and were given only aluminum-foil blankets, he said. Some men had to sleep on the restroom area floor. Ticks bit some of the men and some were very sick, Galicia said. But many were afraid to ask to go to the doctor because CBP officers told them their stay would start over if they did, he said. I would remind you that concentration camps are actually real.  “I told them we had rights and asked to make a phone call. But they told us, ‘You don’t have rights to anything’,” Francisco Galicia said. This is happening. [the screencapped tweets are in initial link] : Garet Bleir @GaretBleir 1/8 Yesterday, Francisco Galicia, a high school senior born in Dallas, TX called his mother for the first time after being released from nearly a month of illegal detainment in U.S. Concentration camps at the hands of CBP and ICE. He was held in "inhumane" conditions, he told me. South Texas 566 Veterans Drive 3:02 PM Jul 24, 2019 Twitter for iPhone Garet Bleir @GaretBleir 21h Replying to @GaretBleir 2/8 Francisco, a U.s. born citizen, was detained by Border Patrol on June 27th at a checkpoint in Falfurrias, Texas while driving with his friends on their way to a college soccer scouting event. At the checkpoint, he showed Border Patrol agents proof of his birth in the U... 1 Garet Bleir @GaretBleir 21h 3/8 he had on him - his Texas State ID, his wallet-sized birth certificate, and his social security card, but the agents told him they believed the documents weren't real, his attorney told me. For the entire three weeks he was held captive in CBP custody, Francisco was not... 1 Garet Bleir @GaretBleir 21h 4/8 allowed to use the phone, even for calls to his attorney or to his mother who feared he would be deported. It wasn't until Saturday, after being transferred to ICE custody, that he was allowed to make a collect phone call. 3 1 Garet Bleir @GaretBleir 21h 5/8 Despite multiple attempts by family members and his attorney to give further proof of his U.S. citizenship, it wasn't until the attorney took this to the news media and grassroots activists throughout Texas that ICE finally released Francisco, she says. 1 t 1 4 Garet Bleir @GaretBleir 21h 6/8 The attorney was told that she would have to present the documents to ICE officials upon arrival at South Texas Detention Complex in Pearsall, TX but after a handful of activists and reporters arrived at the detention facility... 9 1 3 Garet Bleir @GaretBleir 21h 7/8. we watched as ICE officials released Francisco without even speaking to the attorney. This further shows that the officials not only had the proper documentation for his release, they also knew that they had the proper documentation and that he was a U.S. citizen. 1 t 2 5 Garet Bleir @GaretBleir 21h 8/8 I'll be sharing more updates soon, along with videos and photos showing what happened while we were there as soon as possible. Photo: Garet Bleir - Journalism arctic-hands: swan2swan: swan2swan: If you haven’t seen this story, look up his name: Francisco Galicia.  Expect to see him come 2020, when the debates begin and the political battle heats up. Expect to see him in a suit testifying in court, or before Congress. This young man is a witness and a victim, and the fact that this isn’t a more prominent story on every news station is what truly frightens me. From The Dallas News: Galicia says he lost 26 pounds during that time in a South Texas immigrant detention center because officers didn’t provide him with enough food. He said he wasn’t allowed to shower and his skin was dry and dirty. He and 60 other men were crammed into an overcrowded holding area where they slept on the floor and were given only aluminum-foil blankets, he said. Some men had to sleep on the restroom area floor. Ticks bit some of the men and some were very sick, Galicia said. But many were afraid to ask to go to the doctor because CBP officers told them their stay would start over if they did, he said. I would remind you that concentration camps are actually real.  “I told them we had rights and asked to make a phone call. But they told us, ‘You don’t have rights to anything’,” Francisco Galicia said. This is happening. [the screencapped tweets are in initial link]

arctic-hands: swan2swan: swan2swan: If you haven’t seen this story, look up his name: Francisco Galicia.  Expect to see him come 2020,...

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Life hacks! via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2OjcJAt: spreezpz Therapists are just... Common sense filters preezpz Me: yeah so I just don't have the energy to get up and make myself a sandwich or wait for something to cook so I just. Don't Her: why don't you just eat the sandwich components without putting them together Me: Her: you can just eat a handful of cheese and some sandwich meat. You don't have to make a sandwich. Me: Me:what cyanoticfallacy Therapists finding loopholes for mental illness things is one of my favorite things about dealing with mental illness because it really helps me understand that just because a reaction is Common doesn't mean it's Right. Does doing dishes stress you out a lot? Buy paper plates. Do your obsessive thoughts make you worry about leaving your curling iron on so you drive home from work to che curling iron in your purse and bring it to work with you while we work on tackling where this worry comes from. Symptom management doesn't have to look like drudgery. Just put the veganconnor i used to go days without showering because seeing my body was so upsetting that i would end up spiraling and then i realized i could simply turn the lights out. it took some getting used to but i've been showering with the lights off for years and it's now one of my favorite parts of my day. do whatever you want nothing is real and there's no need to inflict unnecessary suffering on yourself just to try to seem "normal" Source: spreezpz #wholesome 218,592 notes Life hacks! via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2OjcJAt

Life hacks! via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2OjcJAt

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godloveyell: thatpettyblackgirl: Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free should be overthrown And assuming that this DIY one is perfectly capable, if an acceptable one can be slapped together with parts found at the local Home Depot, maybe we need to ask why insurance corporations are charging so much for one in the first place. Once we no longer have to support a handful of parasitic billionaires, medical costs would drop greatly. : FOX FOX 5 DC 5 @fox5dc THIS IS AWESOME! Two-year-old Logan Moore needs a walker to get around but his family didn't know if insurance would cover for one, so his local Home Depot found parts to make it themselves. MORE: bit.ly/2YTichw 10:33 AM May 28, 2019 from Washington, DC Twitter Web Client 15.6K Likes 2.6K Retweets Abbi Brown @AbbiSigns To be clear: a disabled child having to use a makeshift walker built out of cheap DIY materials instead of an appropriate walking aid designed and fitted by qualified medical professionals is not awesome. It's a travesty FOX @fox5dc May 28 5 FOX 5 DС THIS IS AWESOME! Two-year-old Logan Moore needs a walker to get around but his family didn't know if insurance would cover for one, so his local Home Depot found parts to make it themselves. MORE: bit.ly/2YTichw 8:49 AM May 29, 2019 Twitter for iPhone 28.5K Likes 8.5K Retweets godloveyell: thatpettyblackgirl: Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free should be overthrown And assuming that this DIY one is perfectly capable, if an acceptable one can be slapped together with parts found at the local Home Depot, maybe we need to ask why insurance corporations are charging so much for one in the first place. Once we no longer have to support a handful of parasitic billionaires, medical costs would drop greatly.

godloveyell: thatpettyblackgirl: Any government or system that wouldn’t give this poor kid a walker for free should be overthrown And...

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freedomjusticewarrior: yahooentertainment: lmao😂/smh🙄 Eli Bosnick had the best response to this ridiculousness. “If I gave you a bowl of skittles and three of them were poison would you still eat them?” “Are the other skittles human lives?” “What?” “Like. Is there a good chance. A really good chance. I would be saving someone from a war zone and probably their life if I ate a skittle?” “Well sure. But the point-” “I would eat the skittles.” “Ok-well the point is-” “I would GORGE myself on skittles. I would eat every single fucking skittle I could find. I would STUFF myself with skittles. And when I found the poison skittle and died I would make sure to leave behind a legacy of children and of friends who also ate skittle after skittle until there were no skittles to be eaten. And each person who found the poison skittle we would weep for. We would weep for their loss, for their sacrifice, and for the fact that they did not let themselves succumb to fear but made the world a better place by eating skittles. Because your REAL question…the one you hid behind a shitty little inaccurate, insensitive, dehumanizing racist little candy metaphor is, IS MY LIFE MORE IMPORTANT THAN THOUSANDS UPON THOUSANDS OF MEN, WOMEN, AND TERRIFIED CHILDREN… … and what kind of monster would think the answer to that question… is yes?” : If I had a bowl of skittles and I told you just three would kill you. Would you take a handful? That's our Syrian refugee problem. TRUMP MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! PENCE 2010 Donald Trump Jr. @Donald.TrumpJr·4h 5.8K 8.4K This image says it all. Let's end the politically correct agenda that doesn't put America first. freedomjusticewarrior: yahooentertainment: lmao😂/smh🙄 Eli Bosnick had the best response to this ridiculousness. “If I gave you a bowl of skittles and three of them were poison would you still eat them?” “Are the other skittles human lives?” “What?” “Like. Is there a good chance. A really good chance. I would be saving someone from a war zone and probably their life if I ate a skittle?” “Well sure. But the point-” “I would eat the skittles.” “Ok-well the point is-” “I would GORGE myself on skittles. I would eat every single fucking skittle I could find. I would STUFF myself with skittles. And when I found the poison skittle and died I would make sure to leave behind a legacy of children and of friends who also ate skittle after skittle until there were no skittles to be eaten. And each person who found the poison skittle we would weep for. We would weep for their loss, for their sacrifice, and for the fact that they did not let themselves succumb to fear but made the world a better place by eating skittles. Because your REAL question…the one you hid behind a shitty little inaccurate, insensitive, dehumanizing racist little candy metaphor is, IS MY LIFE MORE IMPORTANT THAN THOUSANDS UPON THOUSANDS OF MEN, WOMEN, AND TERRIFIED CHILDREN… … and what kind of monster would think the answer to that question… is yes?”
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capt-emmett: pixie-mage: riningear: italiyeah: tonyswirl: ineffable-hufflepuff: misandryevans: babymarkers: the-chocolate-chip-pancake: thatsnotwatyourmomsaid: none pizza with left beef It should be a rule of Tumblr to always reblog none pizza with left beef ive missed you #THIS IS MY FAVORITE FUCKING THING JUST THE BEEF#YOU COULD TELL THE POOR CHEF WAS JUST FUCKING#DISGUSTED#WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS#WHAT THE F U C K IS THIS#WHO THE FUCK ORDERS A#A /NONE/ PIZZA?? JUST BEEF ON THE LEFT???#FUCK IT#F U CK IT#JUST COOK THE FUCKING DOUGH#HERE LET ME THROW THIS FUCKING HANDFUL OF OBLONG BEEF CHUNKS AT YOUR NONE FUCKING PIZZA#FUCK YOU#FUCK YOU AND ALL YOU STAND FOR#LEFT FUCKING BEEF (via askscientistcarlos) I love None Pizza with Left Beef. 3th time i’ve reblogged this 3th tumblr people love this. reddit people love this. 4chan scum loves this. there is just something intrinsically hilarious about none pizza with left beef. bless  I hope this never dies. I hope None Pizza with Left Beef will go down in Internet history alongside such legends as the Rickroll and He-Man’s rendition of “What’s Going On”. YES NONE PIZZA WITH THE LEFT BEEF : Choose Toppings Toppings Cheese WHOLE LEFT RIGHT NONE AMOUNT Sauce Pepperoni Extra Large Pepperon Italian Sausage Green Peppers Black Olives Pineapple Mushrooms Onions Beef Normal Bacon Anchovies ze.com capt-emmett: pixie-mage: riningear: italiyeah: tonyswirl: ineffable-hufflepuff: misandryevans: babymarkers: the-chocolate-chip-pancake: thatsnotwatyourmomsaid: none pizza with left beef It should be a rule of Tumblr to always reblog none pizza with left beef ive missed you #THIS IS MY FAVORITE FUCKING THING JUST THE BEEF#YOU COULD TELL THE POOR CHEF WAS JUST FUCKING#DISGUSTED#WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS#WHAT THE F U C K IS THIS#WHO THE FUCK ORDERS A#A /NONE/ PIZZA?? JUST BEEF ON THE LEFT???#FUCK IT#F U CK IT#JUST COOK THE FUCKING DOUGH#HERE LET ME THROW THIS FUCKING HANDFUL OF OBLONG BEEF CHUNKS AT YOUR NONE FUCKING PIZZA#FUCK YOU#FUCK YOU AND ALL YOU STAND FOR#LEFT FUCKING BEEF (via askscientistcarlos) I love None Pizza with Left Beef. 3th time i’ve reblogged this 3th tumblr people love this. reddit people love this. 4chan scum loves this. there is just something intrinsically hilarious about none pizza with left beef. bless  I hope this never dies. I hope None Pizza with Left Beef will go down in Internet history alongside such legends as the Rickroll and He-Man’s rendition of “What’s Going On”. YES NONE PIZZA WITH THE LEFT BEEF
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bundibird: wrangletangle: stevenrogered: Chris Evans helps Regina King up the stairs to the stage after her Oscars win Okay listen up, all you dudes out there! It’s time for some life lessons from Chris Evans. Wonder why women are fine with this when he does it, but they find you opening a car door or offering to carry stuff for them annoying? Well, wonder no more! It works like this: A large number of women have had to learn how to dodge and swerve and sometimes even slap away men’s hands from the time they hit puberty - and sometimes before. Ladies, cis and trans both, are unfortunately experienced at being groped, poked, prodded, “helped”, and otherwise humiliated and threatened by men. Then also there’s the condescending attitude that of course we need a man’s help, and we should be grateful he offered it. No thanks. Chris is doing something very different here, and you’ll see it in similar video clips of him at other events. You can read his mental process in his body language. He starts with just clapping and congratulating. He offers nothing until there is a need, which doesn’t happen here until Regina’s shoe gets caught on her dress. Since women have literally tripped up the stairs at this ceremony several times over the years (because the shoe and clothing requirements are ridiculous), it is reasonable at this stage to think that my-shoe-caught-on-my-dress is a problem that actually needs to be addressed. This is when Chris offers. How he offers matters. He starts with an open hand toward her, but this is a big no-no. Open hands are a red flag. Open hands grope and grab and shove. He quickly corrects by flipping his arm over and offering his forearm instead. This makes it her choice whether to grab on or ignore him. She doesn’t have to contend with a potentially threatening hand while she’s also contending with her dress. He also bends down a bit to do this. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but Chris is kind of a tall, beefy guy. Guys like that can be a bit intimidating without meaning to be, at least when they’re up close. Also, his arm is a bit too high to be useful to her if he stays at his full height. So he bends down. This is even more visible in the video from him doing this for Betty White at the 2015 Oscars, because she’s shorter than Regina, I guess. He offers his arm for exactly as long as she leans on it. When she lets go, he steps back. This is a guy who isn’t interested in showing off how much she needs his help. He’s just interested in helping, and when he’s not needed, he’s done. He goes back to sit down. He doesn’t hover. Also, Regina King knows who Chris Evans is. His behavior at work thus far has certainly made it into the rumor mill, thus factoring into whether she accepts help from him. Is he a dudebro or jerk to women at work? That doesn’t appear to be the case. Women are not helpless. Compared to men, our clothes are more often obstacles to getting where we need to go safely and with our dignity intact, but conversely, we’ve also learned to deal with that better than most men have. It’s not that we never need or want help; like all people, we do sometimes need a hand. It’s just that “some kinds of help are the kinds of help we all could do without.” If you are offering help to a woman, first make sure she actually appears to be struggling. Second, make yourself as unthreatening as possible and let her do any touching, not the other way around. Third, make sure she can refuse without any consequences. And fourth, back off as soon as she doesn’t need you anymore and let the moment go. I hadn’t even registered why exactly it was that he was so unthreatening in this and the Betty White assistance incidents, but you’re right. It’s all in the way he helps. It’s not that this is unthreatening behaviour “because he’s Chris Evans” – its because his body language is genuinely unthreatening and merely helpful. A+ analysis – I hadn’t even registered the details of why and how this behaviour was 100% ok, while from another man (who probably would have gone about it differentky) it might not have been : bundibird: wrangletangle: stevenrogered: Chris Evans helps Regina King up the stairs to the stage after her Oscars win Okay listen up, all you dudes out there! It’s time for some life lessons from Chris Evans. Wonder why women are fine with this when he does it, but they find you opening a car door or offering to carry stuff for them annoying? Well, wonder no more! It works like this: A large number of women have had to learn how to dodge and swerve and sometimes even slap away men’s hands from the time they hit puberty - and sometimes before. Ladies, cis and trans both, are unfortunately experienced at being groped, poked, prodded, “helped”, and otherwise humiliated and threatened by men. Then also there’s the condescending attitude that of course we need a man’s help, and we should be grateful he offered it. No thanks. Chris is doing something very different here, and you’ll see it in similar video clips of him at other events. You can read his mental process in his body language. He starts with just clapping and congratulating. He offers nothing until there is a need, which doesn’t happen here until Regina’s shoe gets caught on her dress. Since women have literally tripped up the stairs at this ceremony several times over the years (because the shoe and clothing requirements are ridiculous), it is reasonable at this stage to think that my-shoe-caught-on-my-dress is a problem that actually needs to be addressed. This is when Chris offers. How he offers matters. He starts with an open hand toward her, but this is a big no-no. Open hands are a red flag. Open hands grope and grab and shove. He quickly corrects by flipping his arm over and offering his forearm instead. This makes it her choice whether to grab on or ignore him. She doesn’t have to contend with a potentially threatening hand while she’s also contending with her dress. He also bends down a bit to do this. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but Chris is kind of a tall, beefy guy. Guys like that can be a bit intimidating without meaning to be, at least when they’re up close. Also, his arm is a bit too high to be useful to her if he stays at his full height. So he bends down. This is even more visible in the video from him doing this for Betty White at the 2015 Oscars, because she’s shorter than Regina, I guess. He offers his arm for exactly as long as she leans on it. When she lets go, he steps back. This is a guy who isn’t interested in showing off how much she needs his help. He’s just interested in helping, and when he’s not needed, he’s done. He goes back to sit down. He doesn’t hover. Also, Regina King knows who Chris Evans is. His behavior at work thus far has certainly made it into the rumor mill, thus factoring into whether she accepts help from him. Is he a dudebro or jerk to women at work? That doesn’t appear to be the case. Women are not helpless. Compared to men, our clothes are more often obstacles to getting where we need to go safely and with our dignity intact, but conversely, we’ve also learned to deal with that better than most men have. It’s not that we never need or want help; like all people, we do sometimes need a hand. It’s just that “some kinds of help are the kinds of help we all could do without.” If you are offering help to a woman, first make sure she actually appears to be struggling. Second, make yourself as unthreatening as possible and let her do any touching, not the other way around. Third, make sure she can refuse without any consequences. And fourth, back off as soon as she doesn’t need you anymore and let the moment go. I hadn’t even registered why exactly it was that he was so unthreatening in this and the Betty White assistance incidents, but you’re right. It’s all in the way he helps. It’s not that this is unthreatening behaviour “because he’s Chris Evans” – its because his body language is genuinely unthreatening and merely helpful. A+ analysis – I hadn’t even registered the details of why and how this behaviour was 100% ok, while from another man (who probably would have gone about it differentky) it might not have been
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