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                            Hi Adolf Memes From Jojo Rabit
                        
                    

                    
                

            
        
    
        
            
                

                    

                        
                        
                        
                    

                    
                    

                        
                            Commentary: Hi, I'm Karen — and if you don't like my meme we can talk to the manager
                        
                    

                    
                

            
        
    
    






    

    
        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
        

            

                








            

        

        
    
    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            









    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        Hi there!: Hi there!
        

            
            

                
                
                    Hi there!: Hi there!
                    
                
            

            
                
                
Hi there!

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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        wwwwyamd:
a-humble-waffle:


burn-brighter-than-fire:

oxfordcommaforever:

etanselian:

sexhaver:
the LAPD is having a town hall and getting fucking eviscerated
The automated YouTube captions are bad in places so here is a transcription of this incredible call.
[Video description: A Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers keeping them to two minutes. The current caller is Jon Barr.]
LAPC President Eileen Decker, responding to the question “can you hear me?”: Yes, we can.
Barr: Great. Uh, first things first: Chief Moore, you’ve got to do a better job of pretending you care about this, man. I’ve been watching you roll your eyes and offer halfhearted smirks acting like a teenager who’s falling asleep in detention. Are you not aware of the war crimes your department’s doing, or are you just that impatient to go do more of them? I see a lot of you, particularly Soboroff, only react when folks use profanity in their remarks. If you think curse words are bad, wait until you hear about these 600-plus murders your department has committed over the last seven years! As long as Moore’s out here equating peaceful protestors with cops who murder black people, you all could pretend to be as angry about murder as the F-word, okay kids? I know you’re all having a rough day, what with everyone here telling you you’re bad at your jobs. Have you considered being good at your jobs? If not, you could find new jobs in retail or restaurants. I know how desperate Garcetti is to get Angelenos consuming again during a global pandemic. Where were the curfews then, by the way? Weird. Chief Moore is morally obligated to resign. Mikey, I know you said you didn’t mean protestors are as much to blame for George Floyd’s murder as his murderers – that’s a lie! It is what you meant! And we all know it. Mikey’s made it clear in his racist actions and empty platitudes that he doesn’t care about the well-being of his constituents. He loves to tear gas them, blind them, force them indoors with curfews that are announced only a half-hour before they take effect, and racially profile as he does so! Don’t think I didn’t hear about how yesterday you sent out an alert in English saying curfew started at 5PM, and sent out an alert right after in Spanish saying it started at 6! What’s up with that, bud? All your cute Zoom background photos of the city won’t trick us into thinking you care about anyone but yourselves and what’s in your pockets. To close with a James Cameron quote, “Cops think of all non-cops as less than they are: stupid, weak, and evil. They dehumanize the people they are sworn to protect, and desensitize themselves in order to do that job.” That’s you pigs to a T. Black lives matter, act like it. Happy Tuesday.



This one was amazing. 
I’m also a big fan of this one- short and sweet 

[Video description: Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers set to 30 seconds. The current caller is Jeremy Frisch.]
Frisch: Hello can you hear me?
Woman: Hi, yes. 
Frisch [getting progressively louder and angrier]: Black lives matter, defund the police. I find it disgusting that the LAPD is slaughtering peaceful protestors on the street. I had two friends go to the protest in Beverly Hills a couple days ago and the protest was peaceful until the police showed up with their excessive violent force, shooting rubber bullets and throwing tear gas. 
[Frisch is now yelling] 
Is this what you think is protecting and serving? Because I think it’s bullshit! Fuck you Michael Moore! I refuse to call you an officer or a chief because you don’t deserve those titles. You are a disgrace! Suck my dick and choke on it! I yield my time. FUCK YOU!



Holy mother of FUCK they went off



Thank you, thank you thank you for transcribing this because I was in a position with my “neutral” family where I couldn’t listen. Thank you 
: wwwwyamd:
a-humble-waffle:


burn-brighter-than-fire:

oxfordcommaforever:

etanselian:

sexhaver:
the LAPD is having a town hall and getting fucking eviscerated
The automated YouTube captions are bad in places so here is a transcription of this incredible call.
[Video description: A Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers keeping them to two minutes. The current caller is Jon Barr.]
LAPC President Eileen Decker, responding to the question “can you hear me?”: Yes, we can.
Barr: Great. Uh, first things first: Chief Moore, you’ve got to do a better job of pretending you care about this, man. I’ve been watching you roll your eyes and offer halfhearted smirks acting like a teenager who’s falling asleep in detention. Are you not aware of the war crimes your department’s doing, or are you just that impatient to go do more of them? I see a lot of you, particularly Soboroff, only react when folks use profanity in their remarks. If you think curse words are bad, wait until you hear about these 600-plus murders your department has committed over the last seven years! As long as Moore’s out here equating peaceful protestors with cops who murder black people, you all could pretend to be as angry about murder as the F-word, okay kids? I know you’re all having a rough day, what with everyone here telling you you’re bad at your jobs. Have you considered being good at your jobs? If not, you could find new jobs in retail or restaurants. I know how desperate Garcetti is to get Angelenos consuming again during a global pandemic. Where were the curfews then, by the way? Weird. Chief Moore is morally obligated to resign. Mikey, I know you said you didn’t mean protestors are as much to blame for George Floyd’s murder as his murderers – that’s a lie! It is what you meant! And we all know it. Mikey’s made it clear in his racist actions and empty platitudes that he doesn’t care about the well-being of his constituents. He loves to tear gas them, blind them, force them indoors with curfews that are announced only a half-hour before they take effect, and racially profile as he does so! Don’t think I didn’t hear about how yesterday you sent out an alert in English saying curfew started at 5PM, and sent out an alert right after in Spanish saying it started at 6! What’s up with that, bud? All your cute Zoom background photos of the city won’t trick us into thinking you care about anyone but yourselves and what’s in your pockets. To close with a James Cameron quote, “Cops think of all non-cops as less than they are: stupid, weak, and evil. They dehumanize the people they are sworn to protect, and desensitize themselves in order to do that job.” That’s you pigs to a T. Black lives matter, act like it. Happy Tuesday.



This one was amazing. 
I’m also a big fan of this one- short and sweet 

[Video description: Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers set to 30 seconds. The current caller is Jeremy Frisch.]
Frisch: Hello can you hear me?
Woman: Hi, yes. 
Frisch [getting progressively louder and angrier]: Black lives matter, defund the police. I find it disgusting that the LAPD is slaughtering peaceful protestors on the street. I had two friends go to the protest in Beverly Hills a couple days ago and the protest was peaceful until the police showed up with their excessive violent force, shooting rubber bullets and throwing tear gas. 
[Frisch is now yelling] 
Is this what you think is protecting and serving? Because I think it’s bullshit! Fuck you Michael Moore! I refuse to call you an officer or a chief because you don’t deserve those titles. You are a disgrace! Suck my dick and choke on it! I yield my time. FUCK YOU!



Holy mother of FUCK they went off



Thank you, thank you thank you for transcribing this because I was in a position with my “neutral” family where I couldn’t listen. Thank you 

        

            
            

                
                
                    wwwwyamd:
a-humble-waffle:


burn-brighter-than-fire:

oxfordcommaforever:

etanselian:

sexhaver:
the LAPD is having a town hall and getting fucking eviscerated
The automated YouTube captions are bad in places so here is a transcription of this incredible call.
[Video description: A Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers keeping them to two minutes. The current caller is Jon Barr.]
LAPC President Eileen Decker, responding to the question “can you hear me?”: Yes, we can.
Barr: Great. Uh, first things first: Chief Moore, you’ve got to do a better job of pretending you care about this, man. I’ve been watching you roll your eyes and offer halfhearted smirks acting like a teenager who’s falling asleep in detention. Are you not aware of the war crimes your department’s doing, or are you just that impatient to go do more of them? I see a lot of you, particularly Soboroff, only react when folks use profanity in their remarks. If you think curse words are bad, wait until you hear about these 600-plus murders your department has committed over the last seven years! As long as Moore’s out here equating peaceful protestors with cops who murder black people, you all could pretend to be as angry about murder as the F-word, okay kids? I know you’re all having a rough day, what with everyone here telling you you’re bad at your jobs. Have you considered being good at your jobs? If not, you could find new jobs in retail or restaurants. I know how desperate Garcetti is to get Angelenos consuming again during a global pandemic. Where were the curfews then, by the way? Weird. Chief Moore is morally obligated to resign. Mikey, I know you said you didn’t mean protestors are as much to blame for George Floyd’s murder as his murderers – that’s a lie! It is what you meant! And we all know it. Mikey’s made it clear in his racist actions and empty platitudes that he doesn’t care about the well-being of his constituents. He loves to tear gas them, blind them, force them indoors with curfews that are announced only a half-hour before they take effect, and racially profile as he does so! Don’t think I didn’t hear about how yesterday you sent out an alert in English saying curfew started at 5PM, and sent out an alert right after in Spanish saying it started at 6! What’s up with that, bud? All your cute Zoom background photos of the city won’t trick us into thinking you care about anyone but yourselves and what’s in your pockets. To close with a James Cameron quote, “Cops think of all non-cops as less than they are: stupid, weak, and evil. They dehumanize the people they are sworn to protect, and desensitize themselves in order to do that job.” That’s you pigs to a T. Black lives matter, act like it. Happy Tuesday.



This one was amazing. 
I’m also a big fan of this one- short and sweet 

[Video description: Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers set to 30 seconds. The current caller is Jeremy Frisch.]
Frisch: Hello can you hear me?
Woman: Hi, yes. 
Frisch [getting progressively louder and angrier]: Black lives matter, defund the police. I find it disgusting that the LAPD is slaughtering peaceful protestors on the street. I had two friends go to the protest in Beverly Hills a couple days ago and the protest was peaceful until the police showed up with their excessive violent force, shooting rubber bullets and throwing tear gas. 
[Frisch is now yelling] 
Is this what you think is protecting and serving? Because I think it’s bullshit! Fuck you Michael Moore! I refuse to call you an officer or a chief because you don’t deserve those titles. You are a disgrace! Suck my dick and choke on it! I yield my time. FUCK YOU!



Holy mother of FUCK they went off



Thank you, thank you thank you for transcribing this because I was in a position with my “neutral” family where I couldn’t listen. Thank you 
: wwwwyamd:
a-humble-waffle:


burn-brighter-than-fire:

oxfordcommaforever:

etanselian:

sexhaver:
the LAPD is having a town hall and getting fucking eviscerated
The automated YouTube captions are bad in places so here is a transcription of this incredible call.
[Video description: A Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers keeping them to two minutes. The current caller is Jon Barr.]
LAPC President Eileen Decker, responding to the question “can you hear me?”: Yes, we can.
Barr: Great. Uh, first things first: Chief Moore, you’ve got to do a better job of pretending you care about this, man. I’ve been watching you roll your eyes and offer halfhearted smirks acting like a teenager who’s falling asleep in detention. Are you not aware of the war crimes your department’s doing, or are you just that impatient to go do more of them? I see a lot of you, particularly Soboroff, only react when folks use profanity in their remarks. If you think curse words are bad, wait until you hear about these 600-plus murders your department has committed over the last seven years! As long as Moore’s out here equating peaceful protestors with cops who murder black people, you all could pretend to be as angry about murder as the F-word, okay kids? I know you’re all having a rough day, what with everyone here telling you you’re bad at your jobs. Have you considered being good at your jobs? If not, you could find new jobs in retail or restaurants. I know how desperate Garcetti is to get Angelenos consuming again during a global pandemic. Where were the curfews then, by the way? Weird. Chief Moore is morally obligated to resign. Mikey, I know you said you didn’t mean protestors are as much to blame for George Floyd’s murder as his murderers – that’s a lie! It is what you meant! And we all know it. Mikey’s made it clear in his racist actions and empty platitudes that he doesn’t care about the well-being of his constituents. He loves to tear gas them, blind them, force them indoors with curfews that are announced only a half-hour before they take effect, and racially profile as he does so! Don’t think I didn’t hear about how yesterday you sent out an alert in English saying curfew started at 5PM, and sent out an alert right after in Spanish saying it started at 6! What’s up with that, bud? All your cute Zoom background photos of the city won’t trick us into thinking you care about anyone but yourselves and what’s in your pockets. To close with a James Cameron quote, “Cops think of all non-cops as less than they are: stupid, weak, and evil. They dehumanize the people they are sworn to protect, and desensitize themselves in order to do that job.” That’s you pigs to a T. Black lives matter, act like it. Happy Tuesday.



This one was amazing. 
I’m also a big fan of this one- short and sweet 

[Video description: Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers set to 30 seconds. The current caller is Jeremy Frisch.]
Frisch: Hello can you hear me?
Woman: Hi, yes. 
Frisch [getting progressively louder and angrier]: Black lives matter, defund the police. I find it disgusting that the LAPD is slaughtering peaceful protestors on the street. I had two friends go to the protest in Beverly Hills a couple days ago and the protest was peaceful until the police showed up with their excessive violent force, shooting rubber bullets and throwing tear gas. 
[Frisch is now yelling] 
Is this what you think is protecting and serving? Because I think it’s bullshit! Fuck you Michael Moore! I refuse to call you an officer or a chief because you don’t deserve those titles. You are a disgrace! Suck my dick and choke on it! I yield my time. FUCK YOU!



Holy mother of FUCK they went off



Thank you, thank you thank you for transcribing this because I was in a position with my “neutral” family where I couldn’t listen. Thank you 

                    
                    

                    
                
            

            
            
        

    

    

        
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        Hi: Hi
        

            
            

                
                
                    Hi: Hi
                    
                
            

            
                
                
Hi

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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        Hi from America: Hi from America
        

            
            

                
                
                    Hi from America: Hi from America
                    
                
            

            
                
                
Hi from America

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
Save

    



        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            









    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        lowoncliches:

note-a-bear:
My mom sent this to me and i’m howling
White woman: Hi fellow white people. Are you having a sad because that family is enjoying a picnic in the park while being black? Did that customer in front of you just speak a language that makes you irrationally angry? Well this is a great time to try *holds up bottle* Mind Your Own Fucking Business. With Mind Your Own Fucking Business you’ll be able to grow the fuck up and act like a decent fucking human being. Our patented technology allows you to pull your head out of your ass and see the world beyond the brim of your MAGA hat.
White man: Hi honey, I saw some black people at the Starbucks today. 
Woman: Did you mind your own fucking business? 
Man: I sure fucking did. 
*both laughing*
Woman: Stop bothering those nice people today with Mind Your Own Fucking Business.
Man: Side effects may include not harassing people, no one getting arrested or murdered by police, a general sense of well-being for people of color, a lack of Internet fame and or trolling, and coexistence. Please consult a doctor if you are still a piece of shit after Minding Your Own Fucking Business as the symptoms may be result of a deeper problem and require further treatment.
Woman: Now available at Anthropology in Whole Foods.
[Censoring beeps removed for better readability.]
: lowoncliches:

note-a-bear:
My mom sent this to me and i’m howling
White woman: Hi fellow white people. Are you having a sad because that family is enjoying a picnic in the park while being black? Did that customer in front of you just speak a language that makes you irrationally angry? Well this is a great time to try *holds up bottle* Mind Your Own Fucking Business. With Mind Your Own Fucking Business you’ll be able to grow the fuck up and act like a decent fucking human being. Our patented technology allows you to pull your head out of your ass and see the world beyond the brim of your MAGA hat.
White man: Hi honey, I saw some black people at the Starbucks today. 
Woman: Did you mind your own fucking business? 
Man: I sure fucking did. 
*both laughing*
Woman: Stop bothering those nice people today with Mind Your Own Fucking Business.
Man: Side effects may include not harassing people, no one getting arrested or murdered by police, a general sense of well-being for people of color, a lack of Internet fame and or trolling, and coexistence. Please consult a doctor if you are still a piece of shit after Minding Your Own Fucking Business as the symptoms may be result of a deeper problem and require further treatment.
Woman: Now available at Anthropology in Whole Foods.
[Censoring beeps removed for better readability.]

        

            
            

                
                
                    lowoncliches:

note-a-bear:
My mom sent this to me and i’m howling
White woman: Hi fellow white people. Are you having a sad because that family is enjoying a picnic in the park while being black? Did that customer in front of you just speak a language that makes you irrationally angry? Well this is a great time to try *holds up bottle* Mind Your Own Fucking Business. With Mind Your Own Fucking Business you’ll be able to grow the fuck up and act like a decent fucking human being. Our patented technology allows you to pull your head out of your ass and see the world beyond the brim of your MAGA hat.
White man: Hi honey, I saw some black people at the Starbucks today. 
Woman: Did you mind your own fucking business? 
Man: I sure fucking did. 
*both laughing*
Woman: Stop bothering those nice people today with Mind Your Own Fucking Business.
Man: Side effects may include not harassing people, no one getting arrested or murdered by police, a general sense of well-being for people of color, a lack of Internet fame and or trolling, and coexistence. Please consult a doctor if you are still a piece of shit after Minding Your Own Fucking Business as the symptoms may be result of a deeper problem and require further treatment.
Woman: Now available at Anthropology in Whole Foods.
[Censoring beeps removed for better readability.]
: lowoncliches:

note-a-bear:
My mom sent this to me and i’m howling
White woman: Hi fellow white people. Are you having a sad because that family is enjoying a picnic in the park while being black? Did that customer in front of you just speak a language that makes you irrationally angry? Well this is a great time to try *holds up bottle* Mind Your Own Fucking Business. With Mind Your Own Fucking Business you’ll be able to grow the fuck up and act like a decent fucking human being. Our patented technology allows you to pull your head out of your ass and see the world beyond the brim of your MAGA hat.
White man: Hi honey, I saw some black people at the Starbucks today. 
Woman: Did you mind your own fucking business? 
Man: I sure fucking did. 
*both laughing*
Woman: Stop bothering those nice people today with Mind Your Own Fucking Business.
Man: Side effects may include not harassing people, no one getting arrested or murdered by police, a general sense of well-being for people of color, a lack of Internet fame and or trolling, and coexistence. Please consult a doctor if you are still a piece of shit after Minding Your Own Fucking Business as the symptoms may be result of a deeper problem and require further treatment.
Woman: Now available at Anthropology in Whole Foods.
[Censoring beeps removed for better readability.]

                    
                    

                    
                
            

            
            
        

    

    

        
Save

    



        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            








        

    

    
    

        

            









    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        heccinmemes:

fmlcomic:

yoshdawgydog:

positive-memes:




Native Americans Sent Ireland $170 as 1845 Famine Aid, Now Ireland Has Given Back With $3.1 Million Coronavirus Fund


story here



Im crying, not all ppl are trash 

The Irish remember that when the Native American’s had almost nothing, they sent what they could to the Irish. 
While the English were content to let the Irish die, and the US Government was forcing Native American’s off their traditional lands and had just forced an entire Native American Nation to walk halfway across North America, Native American’s reached out to help the Irish.
The Irish Remember.
And the Irish are reaching back to help the people who helped them.

hi this is wholesome i’m happy now: heccinmemes:

fmlcomic:

yoshdawgydog:

positive-memes:




Native Americans Sent Ireland $170 as 1845 Famine Aid, Now Ireland Has Given Back With $3.1 Million Coronavirus Fund


story here



Im crying, not all ppl are trash 

The Irish remember that when the Native American’s had almost nothing, they sent what they could to the Irish. 
While the English were content to let the Irish die, and the US Government was forcing Native American’s off their traditional lands and had just forced an entire Native American Nation to walk halfway across North America, Native American’s reached out to help the Irish.
The Irish Remember.
And the Irish are reaching back to help the people who helped them.

hi this is wholesome i’m happy now
        

            
            

                
                
                    heccinmemes:

fmlcomic:

yoshdawgydog:

positive-memes:




Native Americans Sent Ireland $170 as 1845 Famine Aid, Now Ireland Has Given Back With $3.1 Million Coronavirus Fund


story here



Im crying, not all ppl are trash 

The Irish remember that when the Native American’s had almost nothing, they sent what they could to the Irish. 
While the English were content to let the Irish die, and the US Government was forcing Native American’s off their traditional lands and had just forced an entire Native American Nation to walk halfway across North America, Native American’s reached out to help the Irish.
The Irish Remember.
And the Irish are reaching back to help the people who helped them.

hi this is wholesome i’m happy now: heccinmemes:

fmlcomic:

yoshdawgydog:

positive-memes:




Native Americans Sent Ireland $170 as 1845 Famine Aid, Now Ireland Has Given Back With $3.1 Million Coronavirus Fund


story here



Im crying, not all ppl are trash 

The Irish remember that when the Native American’s had almost nothing, they sent what they could to the Irish. 
While the English were content to let the Irish die, and the US Government was forcing Native American’s off their traditional lands and had just forced an entire Native American Nation to walk halfway across North America, Native American’s reached out to help the Irish.
The Irish Remember.
And the Irish are reaching back to help the people who helped them.

hi this is wholesome i’m happy now
                    
                
            

            
                
                
heccinmemes:

fmlcomic:

yoshdawgydog:

positive-memes:




Native Americans Sent Ireland $170 as 1845 Famine Aid, Now Ireland Has Given...

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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        cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER
: cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER

        

            
            

                
                
                    cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER
: cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER

                    
                
            

            
                
                
cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the g...

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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        Hi how are you: Hi how are you
        

            
            

                
                
                    Hi how are you: Hi how are you
                    
                
            

            
                
                
Hi how are you

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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        cheeseanonioncrisps:

roseverdict:

roseverdict:


jus-tea:

Daddy’s at the food store, Mummy’s out of town,
She’s working at the hospital since Rhona came to town,
Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to town,
Hide away, hide away, she’s come to take us down.
Miss Rhona’s at the doorstep, I’ll keep 6 feet away,
But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her some today,
Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to stay,
Hide away, hide away, we can’t come out to play.
But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her some today,
And here’s a note from Rhona, she wanted me to say,
Hide away, hide away, keep 6 feet away,
Hide away, hide away, she took us down today.






[Image ID: Tumblr user @neanderthyall says in the notes, “I thought that 6 feet was kind of a double meaning. Like six feet away to stop the spread, but when people die they’re six feet underground, and its six feet of the dirt that keeps you apart. Like ‘Hide away, hide away, even though it hurts Hide away, hide away, or the six feet will be dirt’.” End ID.]
HI DON’T LEAVE THIS IN THE NOTES THAT’S ACTUALLY BRILLIANT



It’s not a proper creepy nursery rhyme until it’s got an eery childrens’ game attached to it though (think ring-a-round-the-roses or oranges and lemons).
One child shall be designated ‘Miss (Mr, Mx) Rhona’ and will have to cover their eyes (hide away). They then have to try to catch the other kids— think Blind Man’s Bluff. The children running away chant the rhyme, to make it easier for ‘Rhona’ to find them.
Any child tagged becomes another ‘Rhona’ and must also cover their eyes and join in the chase. The winner is the last child left uninfected.
Meanwhile all adults in the area must watch with a vague sense of unease, and whisper to each other “do you know what that’s inspired by?”
: cheeseanonioncrisps:

roseverdict:

roseverdict:


jus-tea:

Daddy’s at the food store, Mummy’s out of town,
She’s working at the hospital since Rhona came to town,
Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to town,
Hide away, hide away, she’s come to take us down.
Miss Rhona’s at the doorstep, I’ll keep 6 feet away,
But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her some today,
Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to stay,
Hide away, hide away, we can’t come out to play.
But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her some today,
And here’s a note from Rhona, she wanted me to say,
Hide away, hide away, keep 6 feet away,
Hide away, hide away, she took us down today.






[Image ID: Tumblr user @neanderthyall says in the notes, “I thought that 6 feet was kind of a double meaning. Like six feet away to stop the spread, but when people die they’re six feet underground, and its six feet of the dirt that keeps you apart. Like ‘Hide away, hide away, even though it hurts Hide away, hide away, or the six feet will be dirt’.” End ID.]
HI DON’T LEAVE THIS IN THE NOTES THAT’S ACTUALLY BRILLIANT



It’s not a proper creepy nursery rhyme until it’s got an eery childrens’ game attached to it though (think ring-a-round-the-roses or oranges and lemons).
One child shall be designated ‘Miss (Mr, Mx) Rhona’ and will have to cover their eyes (hide away). They then have to try to catch the other kids— think Blind Man’s Bluff. The children running away chant the rhyme, to make it easier for ‘Rhona’ to find them.
Any child tagged becomes another ‘Rhona’ and must also cover their eyes and join in the chase. The winner is the last child left uninfected.
Meanwhile all adults in the area must watch with a vague sense of unease, and whisper to each other “do you know what that’s inspired by?”

        

            
            

                
                
                    cheeseanonioncrisps:

roseverdict:

roseverdict:


jus-tea:

Daddy’s at the food store, Mummy’s out of town,
She’s working at the hospital since Rhona came to town,
Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to town,
Hide away, hide away, she’s come to take us down.
Miss Rhona’s at the doorstep, I’ll keep 6 feet away,
But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her some today,
Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to stay,
Hide away, hide away, we can’t come out to play.
But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her some today,
And here’s a note from Rhona, she wanted me to say,
Hide away, hide away, keep 6 feet away,
Hide away, hide away, she took us down today.






[Image ID: Tumblr user @neanderthyall says in the notes, “I thought that 6 feet was kind of a double meaning. Like six feet away to stop the spread, but when people die they’re six feet underground, and its six feet of the dirt that keeps you apart. Like ‘Hide away, hide away, even though it hurts Hide away, hide away, or the six feet will be dirt’.” End ID.]
HI DON’T LEAVE THIS IN THE NOTES THAT’S ACTUALLY BRILLIANT



It’s not a proper creepy nursery rhyme until it’s got an eery childrens’ game attached to it though (think ring-a-round-the-roses or oranges and lemons).
One child shall be designated ‘Miss (Mr, Mx) Rhona’ and will have to cover their eyes (hide away). They then have to try to catch the other kids— think Blind Man’s Bluff. The children running away chant the rhyme, to make it easier for ‘Rhona’ to find them.
Any child tagged becomes another ‘Rhona’ and must also cover their eyes and join in the chase. The winner is the last child left uninfected.
Meanwhile all adults in the area must watch with a vague sense of unease, and whisper to each other “do you know what that’s inspired by?”
: cheeseanonioncrisps:

roseverdict:

roseverdict:


jus-tea:

Daddy’s at the food store, Mummy’s out of town,
She’s working at the hospital since Rhona came to town,
Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to town,
Hide away, hide away, she’s come to take us down.
Miss Rhona’s at the doorstep, I’ll keep 6 feet away,
But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her some today,
Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to stay,
Hide away, hide away, we can’t come out to play.
But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her some today,
And here’s a note from Rhona, she wanted me to say,
Hide away, hide away, keep 6 feet away,
Hide away, hide away, she took us down today.






[Image ID: Tumblr user @neanderthyall says in the notes, “I thought that 6 feet was kind of a double meaning. Like six feet away to stop the spread, but when people die they’re six feet underground, and its six feet of the dirt that keeps you apart. Like ‘Hide away, hide away, even though it hurts Hide away, hide away, or the six feet will be dirt’.” End ID.]
HI DON’T LEAVE THIS IN THE NOTES THAT’S ACTUALLY BRILLIANT



It’s not a proper creepy nursery rhyme until it’s got an eery childrens’ game attached to it though (think ring-a-round-the-roses or oranges and lemons).
One child shall be designated ‘Miss (Mr, Mx) Rhona’ and will have to cover their eyes (hide away). They then have to try to catch the other kids— think Blind Man’s Bluff. The children running away chant the rhyme, to make it easier for ‘Rhona’ to find them.
Any child tagged becomes another ‘Rhona’ and must also cover their eyes and join in the chase. The winner is the last child left uninfected.
Meanwhile all adults in the area must watch with a vague sense of unease, and whisper to each other “do you know what that’s inspired by?”

                    
                
            

            
                
                
cheeseanonioncrisps:

roseverdict:

roseverdict:


jus-tea:

Daddy’s at the food store, Mummy’s out of town,
She’s working at the hospita...

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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Hi

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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Hi

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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        hi: hi
        

            
            

                
                
                    hi: hi
                    
                
            

            
                
                
hi

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
Save