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wilwheaton:Posted @withregram • @ava I’m told #BlackOutTuesday began to create space for white folks to learn/talk/read/think about racism? Okay. Add this to your agenda. Think about how you can actively work to dismantle the generations-old systems that encourage and protect police misconduct and murder. Actively. Work. To. Dismantle. Take cues from fellow white people who wanted tans and tattoos, so they marched on state capitols with their guns and wallah! States opened. Swagger into the halls of power that you have access to with an outrage on behalf of Black Life. Think about how to defend against police officers who murder us and get away with it. Actively. Work. To. Dismantle.https://www.instagram.com/p/CA87J_iD1mR/?igshid=1uokyx1t7tss7: wilwheaton:Posted @withregram • @ava I’m told #BlackOutTuesday began to create space for white folks to learn/talk/read/think about racism? Okay. Add this to your agenda. Think about how you can actively work to dismantle the generations-old systems that encourage and protect police misconduct and murder. Actively. Work. To. Dismantle. Take cues from fellow white people who wanted tans and tattoos, so they marched on state capitols with their guns and wallah! States opened. Swagger into the halls of power that you have access to with an outrage on behalf of Black Life. Think about how to defend against police officers who murder us and get away with it. Actively. Work. To. Dismantle.https://www.instagram.com/p/CA87J_iD1mR/?igshid=1uokyx1t7tss7

wilwheaton:Posted @withregram • @ava I’m told #BlackOutTuesday began to create space for white folks to learn/talk/read/think about racis...

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what-even-is-thiss: bobcatdump: jaskiegg: mellomaia: aphony-cree: beyoncescock: gahdamnpunk: Honestly!!! This is just psychological trauma in the making THANK YOU I’ve asked parents about this and they always say they are teaching the child responsibility and “respect for other people’s things.” If I point out that the child accidentally broke their own toy they always say “I bought them that toy” or “my sister gave that to them.” The problem is that parents view all possessions as not really belonging to the child. A part of them always seems to think that the adult who provided the money is the real owner If a parent breaks a dish they see it as breaking something that already belonged to them, but if a child breaks it they see it as the child breaking something that belonged to the parents People raising children need to realize that household possessions belong to the entire household. If everyone has to use that plate then it belongs to everyone and anyone can have a forgivable accident with it. It’s okay to deem certain possessions as just yours and ask everyone in the house to respect that, but extend the same respect to your child’s belongings Big mood. I know most of these are talking about little little kids, but here’s a tale from middle school. I had forgotten to charge my phone one night, and this was back when cell phones used to beep loudly when they were low on battery. I kept hearing the noise throughout the afternoon and not recognizing what it was because I’d never heard it before. When I finally did realize what it was, I was in science class and my fellow classmates were making presentations. I reached into my bag to try to turn off the phone, and then the low-battery sound went off, loud enough for the teacher to hear it. She confiscated my phone in front of everyone, and I didn’t get it back until after the weekend because it was a Friday. I was really embarrassed, especially to tell my parents. When I got my phone back that Monday, my teacher said it was important for me to learn this lesson now since in college they wouldn’t tolerate phones going off. Fast forward to when I was in college, any time someone’s phone went off, either the professor would tell them to turn it off, or they would say, “Oh, my bad,” and turn it off themselves, and everyone would move on. I even had a professor who danced around while someone’s phone went off, and it was a welcome moment of levity during the lecture. I say all this to say, one of the worst aspects of being a child/teen was adults assuming my intentions were malicious. God I’ve been reading these posts for a while and each time I am struck with the realization that certainly not all parents were supposed to be a parent “I say all this to say, one of the worst aspects of being a child/teen was adults assuming my intentions were malicious.”YES this The problem is, even if families are forgiving the culture around children still effects the child. I use myself as proof of that. A few times between the ages of 4 and 18 I broke things. I broke my grandma’s favorite Christmas ornament. Her first question was: “Are you hurt?” and when I apologized profusely she said “I’m just glad you weren’t hurt.” I broke a few plates. I broke a couple glasses. Every time my dad’s first response was “Did you get cut?” the second step was cleaning up the broken bits, and the third was a discussion of what led to me breaking it and how I could avoid doing that in the future. Same with spills. Same with stains. My biggest “punishment” from my immediate family was being taught how to clean up the mess I made and being shown in detail how to avoid the same mistake in the future if it was avoidable. There were consequences for my actions, but they were the direct result of those actions and nothing much beyond that. My family tried so hard to teach me how to deal with accidents in a healthy way. They were patient. They treated every slip-up as a learning opportunity. They showed me a lot of love. The other adults still got to me. Teachers still punished and publicly shamed me and other students for our mess-ups. Extended family members outside of my small supportive circle still yelled at me. My friends’ parents still got mad. To the point where whenever I messed up my first instinct was that my dad or grandparents were going to punish me, or yell at me, or hit me, even though they never did. They just didn’t. They always responded with patience and an attitude of “I’m glad you’re safe and I want to help you learn from this.” And I was still afraid of messing up. Mortified. Expecting the worst every time. It’s like… we need to change the culture around this, man. Completely. : what-even-is-thiss: bobcatdump: jaskiegg: mellomaia: aphony-cree: beyoncescock: gahdamnpunk: Honestly!!! This is just psychological trauma in the making THANK YOU I’ve asked parents about this and they always say they are teaching the child responsibility and “respect for other people’s things.” If I point out that the child accidentally broke their own toy they always say “I bought them that toy” or “my sister gave that to them.” The problem is that parents view all possessions as not really belonging to the child. A part of them always seems to think that the adult who provided the money is the real owner If a parent breaks a dish they see it as breaking something that already belonged to them, but if a child breaks it they see it as the child breaking something that belonged to the parents People raising children need to realize that household possessions belong to the entire household. If everyone has to use that plate then it belongs to everyone and anyone can have a forgivable accident with it. It’s okay to deem certain possessions as just yours and ask everyone in the house to respect that, but extend the same respect to your child’s belongings Big mood. I know most of these are talking about little little kids, but here’s a tale from middle school. I had forgotten to charge my phone one night, and this was back when cell phones used to beep loudly when they were low on battery. I kept hearing the noise throughout the afternoon and not recognizing what it was because I’d never heard it before. When I finally did realize what it was, I was in science class and my fellow classmates were making presentations. I reached into my bag to try to turn off the phone, and then the low-battery sound went off, loud enough for the teacher to hear it. She confiscated my phone in front of everyone, and I didn’t get it back until after the weekend because it was a Friday. I was really embarrassed, especially to tell my parents. When I got my phone back that Monday, my teacher said it was important for me to learn this lesson now since in college they wouldn’t tolerate phones going off. Fast forward to when I was in college, any time someone’s phone went off, either the professor would tell them to turn it off, or they would say, “Oh, my bad,” and turn it off themselves, and everyone would move on. I even had a professor who danced around while someone’s phone went off, and it was a welcome moment of levity during the lecture. I say all this to say, one of the worst aspects of being a child/teen was adults assuming my intentions were malicious. God I’ve been reading these posts for a while and each time I am struck with the realization that certainly not all parents were supposed to be a parent “I say all this to say, one of the worst aspects of being a child/teen was adults assuming my intentions were malicious.”YES this The problem is, even if families are forgiving the culture around children still effects the child. I use myself as proof of that. A few times between the ages of 4 and 18 I broke things. I broke my grandma’s favorite Christmas ornament. Her first question was: “Are you hurt?” and when I apologized profusely she said “I’m just glad you weren’t hurt.” I broke a few plates. I broke a couple glasses. Every time my dad’s first response was “Did you get cut?” the second step was cleaning up the broken bits, and the third was a discussion of what led to me breaking it and how I could avoid doing that in the future. Same with spills. Same with stains. My biggest “punishment” from my immediate family was being taught how to clean up the mess I made and being shown in detail how to avoid the same mistake in the future if it was avoidable. There were consequences for my actions, but they were the direct result of those actions and nothing much beyond that. My family tried so hard to teach me how to deal with accidents in a healthy way. They were patient. They treated every slip-up as a learning opportunity. They showed me a lot of love. The other adults still got to me. Teachers still punished and publicly shamed me and other students for our mess-ups. Extended family members outside of my small supportive circle still yelled at me. My friends’ parents still got mad. To the point where whenever I messed up my first instinct was that my dad or grandparents were going to punish me, or yell at me, or hit me, even though they never did. They just didn’t. They always responded with patience and an attitude of “I’m glad you’re safe and I want to help you learn from this.” And I was still afraid of messing up. Mortified. Expecting the worst every time. It’s like… we need to change the culture around this, man. Completely.

what-even-is-thiss: bobcatdump: jaskiegg: mellomaia: aphony-cree: beyoncescock: gahdamnpunk: Honestly!!! This is just psychologica...

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gallusrostromegalus: huggablekaiju: aughtomaton: banyanyabread: elionking: rootbeergoddess: voidbat: callmebliss: rikodeine: ajax-daughter-of-telamon: tastefullyoffensive: (photo via princessmisery) This is a great idea! this is really cool. Kids hate the big plastic keys cos they’re not interesting, they wanna see the things the grownups use all the time I kinda want one of these. DUDE. it’s a giant fucking stim board! GENIUS. This is brilliant  Shit, I might make one of these for myself ^^ This is extremely devopmentally appropriate and smart Hey! They had a thing like this at my preschool, because not only is it a great entertainment center, its also a great tool for teaching toddlers fine motor skills.We also had a board with the fronts of shirts, jackets etc cut out and mounted so we could fool around with and learn how to use buttons, zippers, velcro etc, which meant I was dressing myself pretty early. We also had leftover keyboards, computer mice (sans cables) and a mix and match board of connector cables (bolted down and too short to strangle ourselves with) because I lived in silicon valley in the early 90’s when the tech boom was happening and parents would donate computer stuff for us to fuck around with.Im looking at those gate locks up there and that’s a bit of a bespoke parenting- Dad does run the risk of teaching this toddler how to escape a gated area like the yard, but if the kid isn’t prone to wandering, it’s a good safety thing for him to learn.Some other things to put on a fine motor skills stimboard: doorknobs and handles, switches and buttons (esp of you can wire them up to do something- kids learn patterns way earlier than you might think), window locks and cranks, assorted textures like carpet, fabrics, those reversible sequins, pebbles, sandpaper etc, the tops of jars with different kinds of lids top open and close, and (if you can stand it) anything that makes noises.But pretty much anything that can be fiddled with, changed by touching and is safe to nom on is a good thing.An additional caveat, from my own youth: if the fine motor boards are down at toddler height, dogs, cats, most pet birds and some reptiles will also play with and learn to manipulate these things. Which is also good mental stimulation for them but you can give your animals interesting ideas about what is ok to handle and teach them skills you might not want them to know.: gallusrostromegalus: huggablekaiju: aughtomaton: banyanyabread: elionking: rootbeergoddess: voidbat: callmebliss: rikodeine: ajax-daughter-of-telamon: tastefullyoffensive: (photo via princessmisery) This is a great idea! this is really cool. Kids hate the big plastic keys cos they’re not interesting, they wanna see the things the grownups use all the time I kinda want one of these. DUDE. it’s a giant fucking stim board! GENIUS. This is brilliant  Shit, I might make one of these for myself ^^ This is extremely devopmentally appropriate and smart Hey! They had a thing like this at my preschool, because not only is it a great entertainment center, its also a great tool for teaching toddlers fine motor skills.We also had a board with the fronts of shirts, jackets etc cut out and mounted so we could fool around with and learn how to use buttons, zippers, velcro etc, which meant I was dressing myself pretty early. We also had leftover keyboards, computer mice (sans cables) and a mix and match board of connector cables (bolted down and too short to strangle ourselves with) because I lived in silicon valley in the early 90’s when the tech boom was happening and parents would donate computer stuff for us to fuck around with.Im looking at those gate locks up there and that’s a bit of a bespoke parenting- Dad does run the risk of teaching this toddler how to escape a gated area like the yard, but if the kid isn’t prone to wandering, it’s a good safety thing for him to learn.Some other things to put on a fine motor skills stimboard: doorknobs and handles, switches and buttons (esp of you can wire them up to do something- kids learn patterns way earlier than you might think), window locks and cranks, assorted textures like carpet, fabrics, those reversible sequins, pebbles, sandpaper etc, the tops of jars with different kinds of lids top open and close, and (if you can stand it) anything that makes noises.But pretty much anything that can be fiddled with, changed by touching and is safe to nom on is a good thing.An additional caveat, from my own youth: if the fine motor boards are down at toddler height, dogs, cats, most pet birds and some reptiles will also play with and learn to manipulate these things. Which is also good mental stimulation for them but you can give your animals interesting ideas about what is ok to handle and teach them skills you might not want them to know.
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my-discourse-blog: ryrythescienceguy: Children being naturally exposed to a variety of germs from a very young age (from dirt, pets, playplaces, sandboxes, other kids, etc) is actually really good for the immune system and can even prevent the development of allergies. The reason food allergies are so common these days is precisely because parents are avoiding exposing their kids to possible trigger foods and not letting them get dirty (also the overuse of antibacterial soaps/hand santitizers and antibiotics!). Source: grew up on a farm, played in the dirt and with germy animals and germy siblings/cousins/friends all the time, and very rarely took antibiotics… today I’m 24, have zero allergies, and a great immune system (even my little sister is the same, and she wasn’t vaccinated until she was a teenager). This is also why oldest siblings and only children tend to have more allergies in my anecdotal experience; the parents often get overprepared and don’t let their kid get exposed to ANY germs/allergens—by the time other children come along the parents are jaded enough to not care about it as much, and thus the kids afterwards are exposed to more germs from birth! If this sounds weird and backwards, it’s because for a long time doctors used to teach the exact opposite. Keep your child clean and away from germs and potenial allergy triggers. Until they saw the long-term side effects of this and are now starting to tell new parents how to do it better. NOTE: I AM EXTREMELY PRO-VAX! DO NOT MISTAKE THIS COMMENT AS ANTI-VAX. VACCINATE YOUR FUCKING CHILDREN AND EXPOSE THEM TO GERMS IN A CONTROLLED WAY. THE HUMAN IMMUNE SYSTEM IS CAPABLE OF MANY THINGS BUT IT’S NOT A MIRACLE WORKER AND IT NEEDS HELP!!! Can confirm this is true. I’ve studied food science for 5 years and have 3 qualifications in food safety. : my-discourse-blog: ryrythescienceguy: Children being naturally exposed to a variety of germs from a very young age (from dirt, pets, playplaces, sandboxes, other kids, etc) is actually really good for the immune system and can even prevent the development of allergies. The reason food allergies are so common these days is precisely because parents are avoiding exposing their kids to possible trigger foods and not letting them get dirty (also the overuse of antibacterial soaps/hand santitizers and antibiotics!). Source: grew up on a farm, played in the dirt and with germy animals and germy siblings/cousins/friends all the time, and very rarely took antibiotics… today I’m 24, have zero allergies, and a great immune system (even my little sister is the same, and she wasn’t vaccinated until she was a teenager). This is also why oldest siblings and only children tend to have more allergies in my anecdotal experience; the parents often get overprepared and don’t let their kid get exposed to ANY germs/allergens—by the time other children come along the parents are jaded enough to not care about it as much, and thus the kids afterwards are exposed to more germs from birth! If this sounds weird and backwards, it’s because for a long time doctors used to teach the exact opposite. Keep your child clean and away from germs and potenial allergy triggers. Until they saw the long-term side effects of this and are now starting to tell new parents how to do it better. NOTE: I AM EXTREMELY PRO-VAX! DO NOT MISTAKE THIS COMMENT AS ANTI-VAX. VACCINATE YOUR FUCKING CHILDREN AND EXPOSE THEM TO GERMS IN A CONTROLLED WAY. THE HUMAN IMMUNE SYSTEM IS CAPABLE OF MANY THINGS BUT IT’S NOT A MIRACLE WORKER AND IT NEEDS HELP!!! Can confirm this is true. I’ve studied food science for 5 years and have 3 qualifications in food safety.
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