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bisexualbaker: bisexualbaker: thwippersnapple: Tingle just cranked out 50k words for a spite story for JKR and I am LIVING for it! [Image one: Tweet from Chuck Tingle ( @ChuckTingle ): please enjoy new full length adult romance novel (52000 words) in paperback or ebook about the best wizard: TRANS WIZARD HARRIET PORBER AND THE BAD BOY PARASAUROLOPHUS available now also trans rights amazon.com/dp/B08B386R6J ] [Image two: Cover of the aforementioned Harriet Porber novel; Harriet is front and center, a young trans woman with light skin, long dark hair, and glasses; she has a wand raised in her right hand. Behind her are a mammoth in a wizard’s hat, an anthropomorphic duck-billed dinosaur, and a motorcycle with the head of a woman.] Chuck Tingle is a gift. OMG the summary: Trans wizard Harriet Porber is a master spellsmith who’s found herself in a bit of a pickle. After finishing wizard college, Harriet made a name for herself by creating a hit viral spell, but has since failed to craft a follow up. Now Harriet’s agent, Minerma, is breathing down her neck, suggesting that Harriet take a trip to an island off the coast of England for inspiration.Hoping for some peace and quiet to clear her head, Harriet Porber arrives to find that her new neighbor, an angsty bard named Snabe from the band Seven Inch Nails, is already there making a racket. This parasaurolophus spellcaster is a bad boy through and through, and with his incredible powers of metamagic, Snabe reveals that this layer of reality is much more than it seems. Could Harriet and Snabe really be characters in a parody romance novel?Soon enough, these two are discovering they have more similarities than differences: both trans, both strong, and both hoping to create a new spell that will change the world. But with the addition of two devious sentient motorcycles to the mix, Dellatrix and Braco, things start to get complicated.Now trans wizard Harriet Porber is caught up in a tale of magic and mystery where nothing is as it seems, except for one universal truth: love is real.This is a 52,000 word bad boy romance novel for adults. It contains some explicit scenes. : bisexualbaker: bisexualbaker: thwippersnapple: Tingle just cranked out 50k words for a spite story for JKR and I am LIVING for it! [Image one: Tweet from Chuck Tingle ( @ChuckTingle ): please enjoy new full length adult romance novel (52000 words) in paperback or ebook about the best wizard: TRANS WIZARD HARRIET PORBER AND THE BAD BOY PARASAUROLOPHUS available now also trans rights amazon.com/dp/B08B386R6J ] [Image two: Cover of the aforementioned Harriet Porber novel; Harriet is front and center, a young trans woman with light skin, long dark hair, and glasses; she has a wand raised in her right hand. Behind her are a mammoth in a wizard’s hat, an anthropomorphic duck-billed dinosaur, and a motorcycle with the head of a woman.] Chuck Tingle is a gift. OMG the summary: Trans wizard Harriet Porber is a master spellsmith who’s found herself in a bit of a pickle. After finishing wizard college, Harriet made a name for herself by creating a hit viral spell, but has since failed to craft a follow up. Now Harriet’s agent, Minerma, is breathing down her neck, suggesting that Harriet take a trip to an island off the coast of England for inspiration.Hoping for some peace and quiet to clear her head, Harriet Porber arrives to find that her new neighbor, an angsty bard named Snabe from the band Seven Inch Nails, is already there making a racket. This parasaurolophus spellcaster is a bad boy through and through, and with his incredible powers of metamagic, Snabe reveals that this layer of reality is much more than it seems. Could Harriet and Snabe really be characters in a parody romance novel?Soon enough, these two are discovering they have more similarities than differences: both trans, both strong, and both hoping to create a new spell that will change the world. But with the addition of two devious sentient motorcycles to the mix, Dellatrix and Braco, things start to get complicated.Now trans wizard Harriet Porber is caught up in a tale of magic and mystery where nothing is as it seems, except for one universal truth: love is real.This is a 52,000 word bad boy romance novel for adults. It contains some explicit scenes.

bisexualbaker: bisexualbaker: thwippersnapple: Tingle just cranked out 50k words for a spite story for JKR and I am LIVING for it! [Imag...

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inquisitorhotpants: burntcopper: futureevilscientist: optimysticals: uovoc: konec0: sleepyferret: shitfacedanon: dat-soldier: sonnetscrewdriver: dat-soldier: did-you-kno: Source back the fuck up There’s another story that I like about a Chinese general who had to defend a city with only a handful of soldiers from a huge enemy horde that was in all likelihood going to steamroll the place flat within hours of showing up. So when said horde did arrive, they saw the general sitting outside the city’s open gates, drinking tea. The horde sent a couple of emissaries over to see what was what, and the general greeted them cheerfully and invited them all to come and take tea with him. The horde decided that this was a scenario that had “MASSIVE FUCKING TRAP” written all over it in beautiful calligraphy and promptly fucked off. Whoever that general was, he was clearly the Ancient Chinese equivalent of Sam Vimes. did he just invite us over for tea nah man i’m out This just keeps getting better I fucking love history. ok but tbh that story misses a lot of the subtlety of the situation like ok so this story is the Romance of Three Kingdoms, and essentially takes place between Zhuge Liang, resident tactician extraordinaire, and Sima Yi… OTHER resident tactician extraordinaire. The two were both regarded as tactical geniuses and recognized the other as their rival. Zhuge Liang had a reputation for ambushing the SHIT out of his opponents and using the environment to his advantage, thus destroying large armies with a small number of men. Sima Yi (who kind of entered the picture later) was a cautious person whose speciality was unravelling his opponent’s plans before they began. So it was natural that the two would butt heads; however, since Sima Yi tended to have more men and resources, he started winning battles against the former. Which, y’know, kinda sucked. On to the actual story: Zhuge Liang is all like “shit i gotta defend this city with like 10 men.” Literally if he fights ANY kind of battle here, he WILL lose; his only option for survival is not to fight. And that’s looking more and more impossible until he hears that his rival is leading the opposing army. And then he gets this brilliant idea. He basically opens all the gates, sends his men out in civilian clothes to sweep the streets, and sits on top of the gate drinking tea and chilling out and basically makes the whole thing out to be a trap When Sima Yi comes he’s all like “yo come on in bro” and Sima Yi is like “yeah he’s never been that obvious about his traps before. this is definitely a bluff” and he’s about to head in when he realizes wait. he knows that i think he’s bluffing. and so he gets it in his head that maybe, just MAYBE, Zhuge Liang has this cunning plan that will wipe out his army - recall that he has a pretty good handle on what his rival is capable of. And after a long period of deliberation (which is just like “he know that I know that he knows that etc.”), being the cautious man he is, SIma Yi eventually decides to turn his entire army around and leave. Zhuge Liang later points out that the plan was based specifically on the fact that he was facing his rival; if it had been anyone else, there’s no way it would have worked. A dumber or less cautious person would have simply charged in and won without breaking a sweat.  and that’s the real genius here: it was a plan formed entirely just to deceive one man, and it worked. Zhuge Liang is the most brilliant, sneaky-ass bastard in history. One time his side’s army was out of arrows, which pretty much meant they were screwed. So Zhuge Liang goes and does the logical thing, which is build a fuck ton of scarecrows and put them all on boats. Then he makes the men hide in the boats and sail them out on the river. Well, that day was super foggy (which Zhuge Liang had predicted. Did I mention he was also a freakishly accurate meteorologist?). So the enemy across the river sees a fleet of boats armed to the teeth with what appears to be half an army of men. They panic! and start firing arrows like crazy.  Zhuge Liang lets this play out for a while, then he’s like, ”Ok guys that’s enough.” They calmly turn the boats around and go back to base, where they dismantle the scarecrows and pull out all the enemy’s arrows. Zhuge Liang is legend. I love this post. It just keeps getting better. Like seriously, I would have adored learning about this in World History. If you want to see this in cinematic glory, watch Red Cliff. Especially since it makes Zhuge Liang look like this: Red Cliff is 50% bloody battles and 50% eye candy and about half of that eye-candy is due to Zhuge Liang I fully support watching Red Cliff; it’s gloriously silly entertainment during the battle scenes. Guess what just got moved to the top of my watch list?? :D : inquisitorhotpants: burntcopper: futureevilscientist: optimysticals: uovoc: konec0: sleepyferret: shitfacedanon: dat-soldier: sonnetscrewdriver: dat-soldier: did-you-kno: Source back the fuck up There’s another story that I like about a Chinese general who had to defend a city with only a handful of soldiers from a huge enemy horde that was in all likelihood going to steamroll the place flat within hours of showing up. So when said horde did arrive, they saw the general sitting outside the city’s open gates, drinking tea. The horde sent a couple of emissaries over to see what was what, and the general greeted them cheerfully and invited them all to come and take tea with him. The horde decided that this was a scenario that had “MASSIVE FUCKING TRAP” written all over it in beautiful calligraphy and promptly fucked off. Whoever that general was, he was clearly the Ancient Chinese equivalent of Sam Vimes. did he just invite us over for tea nah man i’m out This just keeps getting better I fucking love history. ok but tbh that story misses a lot of the subtlety of the situation like ok so this story is the Romance of Three Kingdoms, and essentially takes place between Zhuge Liang, resident tactician extraordinaire, and Sima Yi… OTHER resident tactician extraordinaire. The two were both regarded as tactical geniuses and recognized the other as their rival. Zhuge Liang had a reputation for ambushing the SHIT out of his opponents and using the environment to his advantage, thus destroying large armies with a small number of men. Sima Yi (who kind of entered the picture later) was a cautious person whose speciality was unravelling his opponent’s plans before they began. So it was natural that the two would butt heads; however, since Sima Yi tended to have more men and resources, he started winning battles against the former. Which, y’know, kinda sucked. On to the actual story: Zhuge Liang is all like “shit i gotta defend this city with like 10 men.” Literally if he fights ANY kind of battle here, he WILL lose; his only option for survival is not to fight. And that’s looking more and more impossible until he hears that his rival is leading the opposing army. And then he gets this brilliant idea. He basically opens all the gates, sends his men out in civilian clothes to sweep the streets, and sits on top of the gate drinking tea and chilling out and basically makes the whole thing out to be a trap When Sima Yi comes he’s all like “yo come on in bro” and Sima Yi is like “yeah he’s never been that obvious about his traps before. this is definitely a bluff” and he’s about to head in when he realizes wait. he knows that i think he’s bluffing. and so he gets it in his head that maybe, just MAYBE, Zhuge Liang has this cunning plan that will wipe out his army - recall that he has a pretty good handle on what his rival is capable of. And after a long period of deliberation (which is just like “he know that I know that he knows that etc.”), being the cautious man he is, SIma Yi eventually decides to turn his entire army around and leave. Zhuge Liang later points out that the plan was based specifically on the fact that he was facing his rival; if it had been anyone else, there’s no way it would have worked. A dumber or less cautious person would have simply charged in and won without breaking a sweat.  and that’s the real genius here: it was a plan formed entirely just to deceive one man, and it worked. Zhuge Liang is the most brilliant, sneaky-ass bastard in history. One time his side’s army was out of arrows, which pretty much meant they were screwed. So Zhuge Liang goes and does the logical thing, which is build a fuck ton of scarecrows and put them all on boats. Then he makes the men hide in the boats and sail them out on the river. Well, that day was super foggy (which Zhuge Liang had predicted. Did I mention he was also a freakishly accurate meteorologist?). So the enemy across the river sees a fleet of boats armed to the teeth with what appears to be half an army of men. They panic! and start firing arrows like crazy.  Zhuge Liang lets this play out for a while, then he’s like, ”Ok guys that’s enough.” They calmly turn the boats around and go back to base, where they dismantle the scarecrows and pull out all the enemy’s arrows. Zhuge Liang is legend. I love this post. It just keeps getting better. Like seriously, I would have adored learning about this in World History. If you want to see this in cinematic glory, watch Red Cliff. Especially since it makes Zhuge Liang look like this: Red Cliff is 50% bloody battles and 50% eye candy and about half of that eye-candy is due to Zhuge Liang I fully support watching Red Cliff; it’s gloriously silly entertainment during the battle scenes. Guess what just got moved to the top of my watch list?? :D
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wwwwyamd: a-humble-waffle: burn-brighter-than-fire: oxfordcommaforever: etanselian: sexhaver: the LAPD is having a town hall and getting fucking eviscerated The automated YouTube captions are bad in places so here is a transcription of this incredible call. [Video description: A Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers keeping them to two minutes. The current caller is Jon Barr.] LAPC President Eileen Decker, responding to the question “can you hear me?”: Yes, we can. Barr: Great. Uh, first things first: Chief Moore, you’ve got to do a better job of pretending you care about this, man. I’ve been watching you roll your eyes and offer halfhearted smirks acting like a teenager who’s falling asleep in detention. Are you not aware of the war crimes your department’s doing, or are you just that impatient to go do more of them? I see a lot of you, particularly Soboroff, only react when folks use profanity in their remarks. If you think curse words are bad, wait until you hear about these 600-plus murders your department has committed over the last seven years! As long as Moore’s out here equating peaceful protestors with cops who murder black people, you all could pretend to be as angry about murder as the F-word, okay kids? I know you’re all having a rough day, what with everyone here telling you you’re bad at your jobs. Have you considered being good at your jobs? If not, you could find new jobs in retail or restaurants. I know how desperate Garcetti is to get Angelenos consuming again during a global pandemic. Where were the curfews then, by the way? Weird. Chief Moore is morally obligated to resign. Mikey, I know you said you didn’t mean protestors are as much to blame for George Floyd’s murder as his murderers – that’s a lie! It is what you meant! And we all know it. Mikey’s made it clear in his racist actions and empty platitudes that he doesn’t care about the well-being of his constituents. He loves to tear gas them, blind them, force them indoors with curfews that are announced only a half-hour before they take effect, and racially profile as he does so! Don’t think I didn’t hear about how yesterday you sent out an alert in English saying curfew started at 5PM, and sent out an alert right after in Spanish saying it started at 6! What’s up with that, bud? All your cute Zoom background photos of the city won’t trick us into thinking you care about anyone but yourselves and what’s in your pockets. To close with a James Cameron quote, “Cops think of all non-cops as less than they are: stupid, weak, and evil. They dehumanize the people they are sworn to protect, and desensitize themselves in order to do that job.” That’s you pigs to a T. Black lives matter, act like it. Happy Tuesday. This one was amazing. I’m also a big fan of this one- short and sweet [Video description: Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers set to 30 seconds. The current caller is Jeremy Frisch.] Frisch: Hello can you hear me? Woman: Hi, yes. Frisch [getting progressively louder and angrier]: Black lives matter, defund the police. I find it disgusting that the LAPD is slaughtering peaceful protestors on the street. I had two friends go to the protest in Beverly Hills a couple days ago and the protest was peaceful until the police showed up with their excessive violent force, shooting rubber bullets and throwing tear gas. [Frisch is now yelling] Is this what you think is protecting and serving? Because I think it’s bullshit! Fuck you Michael Moore! I refuse to call you an officer or a chief because you don’t deserve those titles. You are a disgrace! Suck my dick and choke on it! I yield my time. FUCK YOU! Holy mother of FUCK they went off Thank you, thank you thank you for transcribing this because I was in a position with my “neutral” family where I couldn’t listen. Thank you : wwwwyamd: a-humble-waffle: burn-brighter-than-fire: oxfordcommaforever: etanselian: sexhaver: the LAPD is having a town hall and getting fucking eviscerated The automated YouTube captions are bad in places so here is a transcription of this incredible call. [Video description: A Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers keeping them to two minutes. The current caller is Jon Barr.] LAPC President Eileen Decker, responding to the question “can you hear me?”: Yes, we can. Barr: Great. Uh, first things first: Chief Moore, you’ve got to do a better job of pretending you care about this, man. I’ve been watching you roll your eyes and offer halfhearted smirks acting like a teenager who’s falling asleep in detention. Are you not aware of the war crimes your department’s doing, or are you just that impatient to go do more of them? I see a lot of you, particularly Soboroff, only react when folks use profanity in their remarks. If you think curse words are bad, wait until you hear about these 600-plus murders your department has committed over the last seven years! As long as Moore’s out here equating peaceful protestors with cops who murder black people, you all could pretend to be as angry about murder as the F-word, okay kids? I know you’re all having a rough day, what with everyone here telling you you’re bad at your jobs. Have you considered being good at your jobs? If not, you could find new jobs in retail or restaurants. I know how desperate Garcetti is to get Angelenos consuming again during a global pandemic. Where were the curfews then, by the way? Weird. Chief Moore is morally obligated to resign. Mikey, I know you said you didn’t mean protestors are as much to blame for George Floyd’s murder as his murderers – that’s a lie! It is what you meant! And we all know it. Mikey’s made it clear in his racist actions and empty platitudes that he doesn’t care about the well-being of his constituents. He loves to tear gas them, blind them, force them indoors with curfews that are announced only a half-hour before they take effect, and racially profile as he does so! Don’t think I didn’t hear about how yesterday you sent out an alert in English saying curfew started at 5PM, and sent out an alert right after in Spanish saying it started at 6! What’s up with that, bud? All your cute Zoom background photos of the city won’t trick us into thinking you care about anyone but yourselves and what’s in your pockets. To close with a James Cameron quote, “Cops think of all non-cops as less than they are: stupid, weak, and evil. They dehumanize the people they are sworn to protect, and desensitize themselves in order to do that job.” That’s you pigs to a T. Black lives matter, act like it. Happy Tuesday. This one was amazing. I’m also a big fan of this one- short and sweet [Video description: Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers set to 30 seconds. The current caller is Jeremy Frisch.] Frisch: Hello can you hear me? Woman: Hi, yes. Frisch [getting progressively louder and angrier]: Black lives matter, defund the police. I find it disgusting that the LAPD is slaughtering peaceful protestors on the street. I had two friends go to the protest in Beverly Hills a couple days ago and the protest was peaceful until the police showed up with their excessive violent force, shooting rubber bullets and throwing tear gas. [Frisch is now yelling] Is this what you think is protecting and serving? Because I think it’s bullshit! Fuck you Michael Moore! I refuse to call you an officer or a chief because you don’t deserve those titles. You are a disgrace! Suck my dick and choke on it! I yield my time. FUCK YOU! Holy mother of FUCK they went off Thank you, thank you thank you for transcribing this because I was in a position with my “neutral” family where I couldn’t listen. Thank you
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officialromaniantranslatiuni: petruparcatoru: andiiwrites: dangerdwight: vrabia: officialromaniantranslatiuni: http://www.bihorcouture.com hey friends, if you care about cultural appropriation and the damage it causes, please check out this awesome project! in 2017 dior copied the design of a traditional romanian coat from the county of bihor and sold it for 30,000 euro, giving no credit to the local artisans. in response, romanian fashion magazine beau monde helped the community create their own brand, bihor couture, which sells the original coat, handmade to order, for 500 euro a piece. they also sell other traditional clothing and jewelry for much more accessible prices (5-45 euro). they’ve been hugely successful so far, and currently have enough pre-orders to cover 4.5 years of work, with 100% of the profits returning to the community.  it’s surprisingly common for big name fashion designers like dior, gaultier, tom ford and altuzarra to copy traditional romanian clothing and sell it for ridiculous prices, with minimal original input, while giving nothing back to the community where these designs originated. it’s completely unfair that a big name designer can just steal so much hard work and misuse it to make huge profits.  please support bihor couture, if not by ordering one of their products, then by spreading the news around. it’s really awesome to see a small community fight back against cultural appropriation so successfully. i hope they carry on for a long time! But like, when this is done to cultures of color, non-white, nothing happens. Like, I’m here for the people in Bihor, but it makes me wish more work was done just like this for African countries, Asian countries, Hispanic Countries, etc. The people of Bihor did this for themselves. With the help of a Romanian magazine, they support themselves. The Romanian community posted this, reblogged this, and you saw and reblogged.  But this wasn’t done ‘for us’, work was not done ‘for the people of Bihor’. White people didn’t see this other ‘white country’, and sad ‘yes, let us help our fellow white citizens on this Earth while continuing to ignore everyone else’. The people of Romania and Bihor saw this and said ‘we must act’ and acted. Take this US-born concept of ‘cultures of color’ away from multicultural continents like Europe, where this thing does not apply. This post gained traction on facebook in Romania, from romanian to romanian, and then on tumblr (as you can see, the tumblr that posted it is a Romanian tumblr). The tumblr explaining you this, vrabia, is a romanian tumblr. Nothing is ‘work done for’. We see it, we reblog it, we did it, we’re bringing it to light.  We are doing it. It is work by, not work for. No one gave Romanian and Bihor anything. They/we did it. You want this ‘done for’ other countries? Angelina Jolie is doing it through UN. Poeple are doing it. But work ’done for Bihor’ (done by) does not invalidate work ‘done for’ other countries and cultures. Let us have this at least, after all the world took Vlad the Impaler and vilified a national hero by making him a bloodsucker.  lol that’s my old blog bless :)))))))) @petruparcatoru I WAS ACTUALLY ABOUT TO MAKE A POST ASKING WHERE ANDIIWRITES WENT : officialromaniantranslatiuni: petruparcatoru: andiiwrites: dangerdwight: vrabia: officialromaniantranslatiuni: http://www.bihorcouture.com hey friends, if you care about cultural appropriation and the damage it causes, please check out this awesome project! in 2017 dior copied the design of a traditional romanian coat from the county of bihor and sold it for 30,000 euro, giving no credit to the local artisans. in response, romanian fashion magazine beau monde helped the community create their own brand, bihor couture, which sells the original coat, handmade to order, for 500 euro a piece. they also sell other traditional clothing and jewelry for much more accessible prices (5-45 euro). they’ve been hugely successful so far, and currently have enough pre-orders to cover 4.5 years of work, with 100% of the profits returning to the community.  it’s surprisingly common for big name fashion designers like dior, gaultier, tom ford and altuzarra to copy traditional romanian clothing and sell it for ridiculous prices, with minimal original input, while giving nothing back to the community where these designs originated. it’s completely unfair that a big name designer can just steal so much hard work and misuse it to make huge profits.  please support bihor couture, if not by ordering one of their products, then by spreading the news around. it’s really awesome to see a small community fight back against cultural appropriation so successfully. i hope they carry on for a long time! But like, when this is done to cultures of color, non-white, nothing happens. Like, I’m here for the people in Bihor, but it makes me wish more work was done just like this for African countries, Asian countries, Hispanic Countries, etc. The people of Bihor did this for themselves. With the help of a Romanian magazine, they support themselves. The Romanian community posted this, reblogged this, and you saw and reblogged.  But this wasn’t done ‘for us’, work was not done ‘for the people of Bihor’. White people didn’t see this other ‘white country’, and sad ‘yes, let us help our fellow white citizens on this Earth while continuing to ignore everyone else’. The people of Romania and Bihor saw this and said ‘we must act’ and acted. Take this US-born concept of ‘cultures of color’ away from multicultural continents like Europe, where this thing does not apply. This post gained traction on facebook in Romania, from romanian to romanian, and then on tumblr (as you can see, the tumblr that posted it is a Romanian tumblr). The tumblr explaining you this, vrabia, is a romanian tumblr. Nothing is ‘work done for’. We see it, we reblog it, we did it, we’re bringing it to light.  We are doing it. It is work by, not work for. No one gave Romanian and Bihor anything. They/we did it. You want this ‘done for’ other countries? Angelina Jolie is doing it through UN. Poeple are doing it. But work ’done for Bihor’ (done by) does not invalidate work ‘done for’ other countries and cultures. Let us have this at least, after all the world took Vlad the Impaler and vilified a national hero by making him a bloodsucker.  lol that’s my old blog bless :)))))))) @petruparcatoru I WAS ACTUALLY ABOUT TO MAKE A POST ASKING WHERE ANDIIWRITES WENT
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relyonloveonceinawhile: whoopsrobots: equilateralwaffle: kotsuso: sophygurl: blindly-nostalgic: itseasytoremember: itseasytoremember: itseasytoremember: itseasytoremember: every day the same telemarketing company calls us. I’ve asked to be taken off their calling list, I’ve tried to be civil, I’ve even tried to not answer the phone, yet they’ll keep calling. So now I’ve resorted to making the phones calls as annoying as possible for them. Today I asked the person to hold while I got a pen and paper. As of now, they’ve been waiting 45 minutes. Update: I just asked him if he was still there, then when he said yes i told him i had found a pen but no paper, but that i’m still looking. It’s been an hour. I HAVE LITERALLY BEEN ON TUMBLR AND YOUTUBE WHILE THIS GUY WAITS. IT’S BEEN ALMOST AN HOUR AND A HALF Update: After an hour and 35 minutes I told him that i had found paper, but my pen was dead. He hung up. Ah well, i’ll just do it again tomorrow! You are the future As a former telemarketer, I can tell you that the only reason that guy hung on the line for so long was because he didn’t really want to make any more calls anyway and was probably reading a book or chatting with friends while you pretended to find paper and pen. He was enjoying your mischief as much, if not more, than you were. You literally gave this guy an acceptable reason to take an hour and a half break. You are his hero. He likely only finally hung up because it was officially his break time anyway. He probably told all his co-workers about your call and they’ll be laughing about it for weeks. Holy shit, is this a happy ending to a post where everybody actually wins? ACTUALLY YES because according to parental unit number one, telemarketers get paid by how long they’re on the phone with someone. so you were literally helping this friend get paid by doing absolutely shit vive la resistance Chaotic Good : relyonloveonceinawhile: whoopsrobots: equilateralwaffle: kotsuso: sophygurl: blindly-nostalgic: itseasytoremember: itseasytoremember: itseasytoremember: itseasytoremember: every day the same telemarketing company calls us. I’ve asked to be taken off their calling list, I’ve tried to be civil, I’ve even tried to not answer the phone, yet they’ll keep calling. So now I’ve resorted to making the phones calls as annoying as possible for them. Today I asked the person to hold while I got a pen and paper. As of now, they’ve been waiting 45 minutes. Update: I just asked him if he was still there, then when he said yes i told him i had found a pen but no paper, but that i’m still looking. It’s been an hour. I HAVE LITERALLY BEEN ON TUMBLR AND YOUTUBE WHILE THIS GUY WAITS. IT’S BEEN ALMOST AN HOUR AND A HALF Update: After an hour and 35 minutes I told him that i had found paper, but my pen was dead. He hung up. Ah well, i’ll just do it again tomorrow! You are the future As a former telemarketer, I can tell you that the only reason that guy hung on the line for so long was because he didn’t really want to make any more calls anyway and was probably reading a book or chatting with friends while you pretended to find paper and pen. He was enjoying your mischief as much, if not more, than you were. You literally gave this guy an acceptable reason to take an hour and a half break. You are his hero. He likely only finally hung up because it was officially his break time anyway. He probably told all his co-workers about your call and they’ll be laughing about it for weeks. Holy shit, is this a happy ending to a post where everybody actually wins? ACTUALLY YES because according to parental unit number one, telemarketers get paid by how long they’re on the phone with someone. so you were literally helping this friend get paid by doing absolutely shit vive la resistance Chaotic Good
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