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butterflyinthewell: shipperwolf1: brunhiddensmusings: fierceawakening: guyveranimefan87: eric-coldfire: eldritchgentleman: cruxofargon: the-critical-feminist: cishetwhiteoppressor: Finally, a sane celebrity who doesn’t bend the knee to feminist bullshit. Source My god I love her. I know people are gonna get salty af about this but by God she’s RIGHT. When Brad Pitt did Fight Club, he was cutting weight for every single scene to maintain his physique at 155. I’ve you’ve ever cut weight, you know how horrible that must have been. He did it because they needed a “look”. Changing Tatum said his Magic Mike body doesn’t last for more than five days. He starved down and dehydrated his already fit physique for a “look”. The male soldiers on Spartacus: Blood and Sand were eating pretty much chicken and veggies for every meal to maintain a “look”. Why is this such a big deal? Because all these characters are considered physical goals for men. These are actual unobtainable physical standards for men. Male body image issues get swept under the rug so often that some people don’t even think they exist. You want proof? Just check out that scene in Captain America: First Avenger where Cap just transformed into that beautiful beefcake of a man. Agent Carter’s actress just HAD to touch them muscles, it was completely unscripted. Chris Evans had to wear shirts so small they physically hurt, and he dislocated a shoulder during the helicopter scene in Civil War. But who cares, girls got to wet their panties watching Captain America flex. If we are talking about unrealistic physical standards of male fitness given to us by movies, I would like to mention Hugh “Wolverine” Jackman here. Yeah, he is ripped, isn’t he? Well, it is true, but to get that kind of definition, he went through 36 hour period of dehydration, which caused him to temporarily lose 10 pounds of “water weight”.  Thus during the fight scene he was filming, he was a hair breadth from blacking out whole time, just to look unrealistically muscular. As he said during interview with Steven Colbert, “If You go three days without water, You will die. Then, when You are halfway there they shout ‘Roll it!” It’s the same with professional bodybuilders who get into periods of extreme fasting and dehydration to lower their fat-to-muscle ratio to inhuman levels, all in hopes of making their muscle definition a bit better. According to experts, healthy body fat percentage for a healthy male ranges from 8% to 20%, depending on height, lifestyle and numerous other variables.  Fitness model and professional bodybuilder Helmut Strebl also known as “World’s Most Shredded Man” as he supposedly managed to get his body fat percentage below 5%… … But only when he partakes in competitions, since it is not humanly possible to live with such low fat percentage of one’s body for longer periods of time. I mean, yeah, he keeps a draconian training regime, as well as a very strict diet even off-season, but looks much more human then… There are documented cases of incredibly fit and muscular bodybuilders fainting on the stage in the middle of their flexing routines, as well as several who outright died, because of cardiac arrest caused by their blood becoming too thick, due to long dehydration… And let’s not forget about Muscle Dysmorphia, colloquially known as “Megarexia” or “Bigarexia”. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muscle_dysmorphia Yeah, it’s a thing, but it’s barely talked about, since it’s apparently not manly to admit to having problems like that, which also creates problems with researching this particular disorder… So… Thanks Hollywood? I had no idea that most people who looked like this are dehydrated until I read posts like this. dehydrated to the point theyre about a day away from actual organ failureokay so chris hemsworth is a absolute god of a man, but hollywood says ‘thats not good enough’ and for the thor movie he has to spend several days having the juice squeezed from his body untill he looses about a gallon of whats supposed to be him so that he can do 2 days of shooting scenes without his shirt, after which he has to have recovery time before he is hospitalized because i am not joking about ‘one day away from organ failure’thats the benchmark- look at chris hemsworth and process that he is told he isnt suitable for a shirtless scene without prepping for three days and nearly fainting real feminism acknowledges the unhealthy standards that men are held to. radfems brush them off as non-existent guys, feminism is for you, too. it’s for all of us. I would hate to think of what Dave Bautista had to go through since he was shirtless the entire time as Drax. All that makeup plus dieting….yikes! Also, let’s not forget that men can get eating disorders like anorexia and bulimia too. : Game Of Thrones's Natalie Dormer: men are as objectified as women on TV actor has joined the debate genders are judged equally on looks about objectification in TVand L4 butterflyinthewell: shipperwolf1: brunhiddensmusings: fierceawakening: guyveranimefan87: eric-coldfire: eldritchgentleman: cruxofargon: the-critical-feminist: cishetwhiteoppressor: Finally, a sane celebrity who doesn’t bend the knee to feminist bullshit. Source My god I love her. I know people are gonna get salty af about this but by God she’s RIGHT. When Brad Pitt did Fight Club, he was cutting weight for every single scene to maintain his physique at 155. I’ve you’ve ever cut weight, you know how horrible that must have been. He did it because they needed a “look”. Changing Tatum said his Magic Mike body doesn’t last for more than five days. He starved down and dehydrated his already fit physique for a “look”. The male soldiers on Spartacus: Blood and Sand were eating pretty much chicken and veggies for every meal to maintain a “look”. Why is this such a big deal? Because all these characters are considered physical goals for men. These are actual unobtainable physical standards for men. Male body image issues get swept under the rug so often that some people don’t even think they exist. You want proof? Just check out that scene in Captain America: First Avenger where Cap just transformed into that beautiful beefcake of a man. Agent Carter’s actress just HAD to touch them muscles, it was completely unscripted. Chris Evans had to wear shirts so small they physically hurt, and he dislocated a shoulder during the helicopter scene in Civil War. But who cares, girls got to wet their panties watching Captain America flex. If we are talking about unrealistic physical standards of male fitness given to us by movies, I would like to mention Hugh “Wolverine” Jackman here. Yeah, he is ripped, isn’t he? Well, it is true, but to get that kind of definition, he went through 36 hour period of dehydration, which caused him to temporarily lose 10 pounds of “water weight”.  Thus during the fight scene he was filming, he was a hair breadth from blacking out whole time, just to look unrealistically muscular. As he said during interview with Steven Colbert, “If You go three days without water, You will die. Then, when You are halfway there they shout ‘Roll it!” It’s the same with professional bodybuilders who get into periods of extreme fasting and dehydration to lower their fat-to-muscle ratio to inhuman levels, all in hopes of making their muscle definition a bit better. According to experts, healthy body fat percentage for a healthy male ranges from 8% to 20%, depending on height, lifestyle and numerous other variables.  Fitness model and professional bodybuilder Helmut Strebl also known as “World’s Most Shredded Man” as he supposedly managed to get his body fat percentage below 5%… … But only when he partakes in competitions, since it is not humanly possible to live with such low fat percentage of one’s body for longer periods of time. I mean, yeah, he keeps a draconian training regime, as well as a very strict diet even off-season, but looks much more human then… There are documented cases of incredibly fit and muscular bodybuilders fainting on the stage in the middle of their flexing routines, as well as several who outright died, because of cardiac arrest caused by their blood becoming too thick, due to long dehydration… And let’s not forget about Muscle Dysmorphia, colloquially known as “Megarexia” or “Bigarexia”. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muscle_dysmorphia Yeah, it’s a thing, but it’s barely talked about, since it’s apparently not manly to admit to having problems like that, which also creates problems with researching this particular disorder… So… Thanks Hollywood? I had no idea that most people who looked like this are dehydrated until I read posts like this. dehydrated to the point theyre about a day away from actual organ failureokay so chris hemsworth is a absolute god of a man, but hollywood says ‘thats not good enough’ and for the thor movie he has to spend several days having the juice squeezed from his body untill he looses about a gallon of whats supposed to be him so that he can do 2 days of shooting scenes without his shirt, after which he has to have recovery time before he is hospitalized because i am not joking about ‘one day away from organ failure’thats the benchmark- look at chris hemsworth and process that he is told he isnt suitable for a shirtless scene without prepping for three days and nearly fainting real feminism acknowledges the unhealthy standards that men are held to. radfems brush them off as non-existent guys, feminism is for you, too. it’s for all of us. I would hate to think of what Dave Bautista had to go through since he was shirtless the entire time as Drax. All that makeup plus dieting….yikes! Also, let’s not forget that men can get eating disorders like anorexia and bulimia too.
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shipperwolf1: brunhiddensmusings: fierceawakening: guyveranimefan87: eric-coldfire: eldritchgentleman: cruxofargon: the-critical-feminist: cishetwhiteoppressor: Finally, a sane celebrity who doesn’t bend the knee to feminist bullshit. Source My god I love her. I know people are gonna get salty af about this but by God she’s RIGHT. When Brad Pitt did Fight Club, he was cutting weight for every single scene to maintain his physique at 155. I’ve you’ve ever cut weight, you know how horrible that must have been. He did it because they needed a “look”. Changing Tatum said his Magic Mike body doesn’t last for more than five days. He starved down and dehydrated his already fit physique for a “look”. The male soldiers on Spartacus: Blood and Sand were eating pretty much chicken and veggies for every meal to maintain a “look”. Why is this such a big deal? Because all these characters are considered physical goals for men. These are actual unobtainable physical standards for men. Male body image issues get swept under the rug so often that some people don’t even think they exist. You want proof? Just check out that scene in Captain America: First Avenger where Cap just transformed into that beautiful beefcake of a man. Agent Carter’s actress just HAD to touch them muscles, it was completely unscripted. Chris Evans had to wear shirts so small they physically hurt, and he dislocated a shoulder during the helicopter scene in Civil War. But who cares, girls got to wet their panties watching Captain America flex. If we are talking about unrealistic physical standards of male fitness given to us by movies, I would like to mention Hugh “Wolverine” Jackman here. Yeah, he is ripped, isn’t he? Well, it is true, but to get that kind of definition, he went through 36 hour period of dehydration, which caused him to temporarily lose 10 pounds of “water weight”.  Thus during the fight scene he was filming, he was a hair breadth from blacking out whole time, just to look unrealistically muscular. As he said during interview with Steven Colbert, “If You go three days without water, You will die. Then, when You are halfway there they shout ‘Roll it!” It’s the same with professional bodybuilders who get into periods of extreme fasting and dehydration to lower their fat-to-muscle ratio to inhuman levels, all in hopes of making their muscle definition a bit better. According to experts, healthy body fat percentage for a healthy male ranges from 8% to 20%, depending on height, lifestyle and numerous other variables.  Fitness model and professional bodybuilder Helmut Strebl also known as “World’s Most Shredded Man” as he supposedly managed to get his body fat percentage below 5%… … But only when he partakes in competitions, since it is not humanly possible to live with such low fat percentage of one’s body for longer periods of time. I mean, yeah, he keeps a draconian training regime, as well as a very strict diet even off-season, but looks much more human then… There are documented cases of incredibly fit and muscular bodybuilders fainting on the stage in the middle of their flexing routines, as well as several who outright died, because of cardiac arrest caused by their blood becoming too thick, due to long dehydration… And let’s not forget about Muscle Dysmorphia, colloquially known as “Megarexia” or “Bigarexia”. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muscle_dysmorphia Yeah, it’s a thing, but it’s barely talked about, since it’s apparently not manly to admit to having problems like that, which also creates problems with researching this particular disorder… So… Thanks Hollywood? I had no idea that most people who looked like this are dehydrated until I read posts like this. dehydrated to the point theyre about a day away from actual organ failureokay so chris hemsworth is a absolute god of a man, but hollywood says ‘thats not good enough’ and for the thor movie he has to spend several days having the juice squeezed from his body untill he looses about a gallon of whats supposed to be him so that he can do 2 days of shooting scenes without his shirt, after which he has to have recovery time before he is hospitalized because i am not joking about ‘one day away from organ failure’thats the benchmark- look at chris hemsworth and process that he is told he isnt suitable for a shirtless scene without prepping for three days and nearly fainting real feminism acknowledges the unhealthy standards that men are held to. radfems brush them off as non-existent guys, feminism is for you, too. it’s for all of us. : Game Of Thrones's Natalie Dormer: men are as objectified as women on TV actor has joined the debate genders are judged equally on looks about objectification in TVand L4 shipperwolf1: brunhiddensmusings: fierceawakening: guyveranimefan87: eric-coldfire: eldritchgentleman: cruxofargon: the-critical-feminist: cishetwhiteoppressor: Finally, a sane celebrity who doesn’t bend the knee to feminist bullshit. Source My god I love her. I know people are gonna get salty af about this but by God she’s RIGHT. When Brad Pitt did Fight Club, he was cutting weight for every single scene to maintain his physique at 155. I’ve you’ve ever cut weight, you know how horrible that must have been. He did it because they needed a “look”. Changing Tatum said his Magic Mike body doesn’t last for more than five days. He starved down and dehydrated his already fit physique for a “look”. The male soldiers on Spartacus: Blood and Sand were eating pretty much chicken and veggies for every meal to maintain a “look”. Why is this such a big deal? Because all these characters are considered physical goals for men. These are actual unobtainable physical standards for men. Male body image issues get swept under the rug so often that some people don’t even think they exist. You want proof? Just check out that scene in Captain America: First Avenger where Cap just transformed into that beautiful beefcake of a man. Agent Carter’s actress just HAD to touch them muscles, it was completely unscripted. Chris Evans had to wear shirts so small they physically hurt, and he dislocated a shoulder during the helicopter scene in Civil War. But who cares, girls got to wet their panties watching Captain America flex. If we are talking about unrealistic physical standards of male fitness given to us by movies, I would like to mention Hugh “Wolverine” Jackman here. Yeah, he is ripped, isn’t he? Well, it is true, but to get that kind of definition, he went through 36 hour period of dehydration, which caused him to temporarily lose 10 pounds of “water weight”.  Thus during the fight scene he was filming, he was a hair breadth from blacking out whole time, just to look unrealistically muscular. As he said during interview with Steven Colbert, “If You go three days without water, You will die. Then, when You are halfway there they shout ‘Roll it!” It’s the same with professional bodybuilders who get into periods of extreme fasting and dehydration to lower their fat-to-muscle ratio to inhuman levels, all in hopes of making their muscle definition a bit better. According to experts, healthy body fat percentage for a healthy male ranges from 8% to 20%, depending on height, lifestyle and numerous other variables.  Fitness model and professional bodybuilder Helmut Strebl also known as “World’s Most Shredded Man” as he supposedly managed to get his body fat percentage below 5%… … But only when he partakes in competitions, since it is not humanly possible to live with such low fat percentage of one’s body for longer periods of time. I mean, yeah, he keeps a draconian training regime, as well as a very strict diet even off-season, but looks much more human then… There are documented cases of incredibly fit and muscular bodybuilders fainting on the stage in the middle of their flexing routines, as well as several who outright died, because of cardiac arrest caused by their blood becoming too thick, due to long dehydration… And let’s not forget about Muscle Dysmorphia, colloquially known as “Megarexia” or “Bigarexia”. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muscle_dysmorphia Yeah, it’s a thing, but it’s barely talked about, since it’s apparently not manly to admit to having problems like that, which also creates problems with researching this particular disorder… So… Thanks Hollywood? I had no idea that most people who looked like this are dehydrated until I read posts like this. dehydrated to the point theyre about a day away from actual organ failureokay so chris hemsworth is a absolute god of a man, but hollywood says ‘thats not good enough’ and for the thor movie he has to spend several days having the juice squeezed from his body untill he looses about a gallon of whats supposed to be him so that he can do 2 days of shooting scenes without his shirt, after which he has to have recovery time before he is hospitalized because i am not joking about ‘one day away from organ failure’thats the benchmark- look at chris hemsworth and process that he is told he isnt suitable for a shirtless scene without prepping for three days and nearly fainting real feminism acknowledges the unhealthy standards that men are held to. radfems brush them off as non-existent guys, feminism is for you, too. it’s for all of us.
Save
homestuckpatternreference: iamthesylveon: f-e-f-e-t-a-c-a-k-e-s: gryphynshadow: silencingthedrums: zeaky: sliceofbri: DID YOU MOTHERFUCKERS REALLY THINK YOU WERE DONE WITH ME? I THINK NOT. THAT’S RIGHT IT’S THE SUGAR SCRUB CHICK BACK WITH ANOTHER FUCKING TUTORIAL. YOU BITCHES HAVE BEEN ASKING ME FOR AGES TO MAKE ANOTHER ONE OF THESE FUCKING POSTS AND IT’S FUCKING LATE SO HERE YOU GO FUCKERS WE GON LEARN SOME SHIT SO SIT DOWN AND BE QUIET SO WE ALL WANT LIPS RED AS THE BLOOD OF ANGRY MEN RIGHT AND WHO DOESN’T FUCKING LIKE ARTS AND CRAFTS AND I DON’T EVEN NEED TO TALK ABOUT HOW HARD IT IS TO FIND LIPSTICK FOR FUCKING COSPLAY SO BEHOLD THE HUMBLE CRAYON YOU LITTLE SHITS GET A CRAYON. AND NOT JUST ANY CRAYON A FUCKING CRAYOLA CRAYON DON’T EVEN TRY WITH THAT ROSEART SHIT BECAUSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RIP OUT YOUR UVULA. IF YOU WANNA GET REALLY ARTSY WHIP OUT ONE OF THESE BAD BOYS  AND BREAK UP SOME CRAYONS TO GET THE PERFECT SHADE OF BLUE GREEN FOR THAT BADASS COSPLAY YOU’VE GOT PICKED OUT BUT MARK MY WORDS NO MORE THAN ONE FUCKING CRAYON’S WORTH OF BITS BETTER GO INTO THIS FUCKING BOWL. SPEAKING OF WHICH, YOU NEED SOME OTHER FUCKING SHIT IN THERE SO GO GET SOME OIL. THE GOOD STUFF. I’M TALKING EVOO BITCHES THE VIRGINAL BLOOD OF THE MOST TENDER OLIVES IN ALL THE LAND. SQUEEZE SOME OF THAT HEAVENLY LUBRICANT INTO YOUR BOWL, ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON, THAT’LL DO PIG, THAT’LL DO. NOW GO FIND SOME SHEA BUTTER OR COCONUT OIL AND GLOP ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON OF THAT IN YOUR BOWL. NOW GO TO YOUR MAGICAL CABINET OF WONDERS AND FIND SOME NICE SMELLING SHIT. COULD BE VANILLA EXTRACT. COULD BE LAVENDER OIL. I DON’T KNOW BRO WHATEVER YOU THINK SMELLS LIKE THE SILKY UNDERBELLY OF A NEWBORN UNICORN(important note make sure you use a FOOD SAFE oil if it doesn’t say it’s food safe/food grade don’t use it!) GRASP THE BOTTLE FIRMLY, SCREAM LIKE A VICTORIOUS PTERODACTYL, AND DROP 1-4 DROPS OF THAT SWEET SMELLING LIQUID IN THERE. I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS RIGHT THERE BECAUSE IT IS THE HEATING VESSEL FOR YOUR GLORIOUS LIPSTICK THAT’S RIGHT LIKE A VIKING WARLORD YOU ARE GOING TO USE A DOUBLE BOILER. SO GET A SAUCEPAN AND HEAT SOME WATER, THEN PLOP THAT SWEET SMELLING BOWL OF OIL AND WAX ON TOP OF THAT STEAMY WATER LIKE THE COLLISION OF YOUR OTP IN A BAD FANFIC OH YEAH. STIR THAT SHIT UNTIL EVERYTHING IS MELTY AND SMOOTH YOU DON’T WANT TO RUIN YOUR SPOONS SO I USE A DISPOSABLE CHOPSTICK FUCK YEAH RECYCLING NOW ONCE THAT SHIT IS SOFT LIKE THE SUPPLE SKIN OF YOUR HEAVENLY BOOTY, YOU NEED SOMETHING TO POUR IT INTO WELL DAMN GOOD THING YOU PICKED UP SOME CONTACT CASES LAST TIME YOU WERE AT THE STORE OR MAYBE YOU HAVE SOME EMPTY CHAPSTICK TUBES OR JUST SOME SMALL TUPPERWARE I DON’T KNOW BUT GOSH YOU ARE SO RESOURCEFUL AND PRETTY YOU DESERVE NICE LIPSTICK LIKE THIS ALSO TAKE SOME TIME FOR YOU THIS WEEKEND AND NEVER FORGET HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU I’M GLAD WE HAD THAT MOMENT TOGETHER NOW BECAUSE NOTHING IS MORE METAL THAN SAFETY, TAKE A THICK HAND TOWEL OR AN OVEN MITT OR SOMETHING AND GRIP THAT BOWL OF COLORFUL GOOP AND POUR GENTLY INTO THAT RECEPTACLE YOU PROCURED. YOU WILL PROBABLY SPILL SOME BUT THAT’S OKAY YOU’RE ONLY HUMAN. POP THAT SHIT IN THE FRIDGE BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IMPATIENT MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU WANT YOUR LIPSTICK NOW GODDAMMIT AND ONCE IT HARDENS SLATHER THAT CREAMY GOODNESS ON THICK, SLIDE ON SOME SUNGLASSES, AND HEAD INTO BATTLE TO DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY CLASS DISMISSED MOTHERFUCKERS DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS. NO DO NOT FUCKING DO THIS, CRYON HAS A LOT OF FUCKING LEAD IN IT (four times more than lipstick) PLEASE JUST BUY ACTUAL LIPSTICK. There’s no lead in crayola crayons. Kids eat them. The ingredients in Crayola Crayons are: paraffin, wax, and pigment. They’re made with the understanding that some kids will eat the damn things, so the company that makes Crayons has been very very careful to use non-toxic materials, even going so far as to use a special edible glue on the paper labels. (cornstarch and water, fyi) You can eat Crayons, if you really wanted to, but frankly the flavor’s a little bland. They taste like wax. So, yeah. adding oils with a lower solidification temperature like Olive Oil or Grapeseed or Avocado, and mixing in some Shea or Coconut Butter would make a creamy crayon. Which you could use on your skin, if you wanted. Go wild, use that shit on more than just lips. Use it like theatrical makeup, paint your tits blue if you want. Or use it like paint on the walls, or paper, or canvas. It won’t dry the same way acrylic or watercolor paint will, and will remain ‘workable’ and pliable until the oil looses enough water to solidify, much like, oh, off the top of my head… oil paint. Modern oil paints are very similar to the recipe above, though usually done with Linseed oil or other inert non-organic oils. Organic oils, as they dry, can discolor, making your carefully chosen color look off. Why are some really old painting slightly yellow? Partly the varnish has yellowed, partly airborne pollutants have stained the surface, and partly the oil in the original paint has shifted color. BTW, don’t eat Linseed oil, you’ll get the runs something fierce and regret it a lot. And then you get to go to the doctor and explain why your runny poo is brightly colored. But the amount you’d ingest from lipstick made with crayons? Negligible. Now I really want to make a set of rainbow lipstick to match my rainbow collection of nail polish (which is way more toxic than crayon lipstick, too.) so what you’re saying is i could buy a fuckton of grey crayns and have grey body paint i think i know where that’s going i think we all know where that’s going : Crayola e With Preferred by Teachers ar E CRAYONS 24 homestuckpatternreference: iamthesylveon: f-e-f-e-t-a-c-a-k-e-s: gryphynshadow: silencingthedrums: zeaky: sliceofbri: DID YOU MOTHERFUCKERS REALLY THINK YOU WERE DONE WITH ME? I THINK NOT. THAT’S RIGHT IT’S THE SUGAR SCRUB CHICK BACK WITH ANOTHER FUCKING TUTORIAL. YOU BITCHES HAVE BEEN ASKING ME FOR AGES TO MAKE ANOTHER ONE OF THESE FUCKING POSTS AND IT’S FUCKING LATE SO HERE YOU GO FUCKERS WE GON LEARN SOME SHIT SO SIT DOWN AND BE QUIET SO WE ALL WANT LIPS RED AS THE BLOOD OF ANGRY MEN RIGHT AND WHO DOESN’T FUCKING LIKE ARTS AND CRAFTS AND I DON’T EVEN NEED TO TALK ABOUT HOW HARD IT IS TO FIND LIPSTICK FOR FUCKING COSPLAY SO BEHOLD THE HUMBLE CRAYON YOU LITTLE SHITS GET A CRAYON. AND NOT JUST ANY CRAYON A FUCKING CRAYOLA CRAYON DON’T EVEN TRY WITH THAT ROSEART SHIT BECAUSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RIP OUT YOUR UVULA. IF YOU WANNA GET REALLY ARTSY WHIP OUT ONE OF THESE BAD BOYS  AND BREAK UP SOME CRAYONS TO GET THE PERFECT SHADE OF BLUE GREEN FOR THAT BADASS COSPLAY YOU’VE GOT PICKED OUT BUT MARK MY WORDS NO MORE THAN ONE FUCKING CRAYON’S WORTH OF BITS BETTER GO INTO THIS FUCKING BOWL. SPEAKING OF WHICH, YOU NEED SOME OTHER FUCKING SHIT IN THERE SO GO GET SOME OIL. THE GOOD STUFF. I’M TALKING EVOO BITCHES THE VIRGINAL BLOOD OF THE MOST TENDER OLIVES IN ALL THE LAND. SQUEEZE SOME OF THAT HEAVENLY LUBRICANT INTO YOUR BOWL, ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON, THAT’LL DO PIG, THAT’LL DO. NOW GO FIND SOME SHEA BUTTER OR COCONUT OIL AND GLOP ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON OF THAT IN YOUR BOWL. NOW GO TO YOUR MAGICAL CABINET OF WONDERS AND FIND SOME NICE SMELLING SHIT. COULD BE VANILLA EXTRACT. COULD BE LAVENDER OIL. I DON’T KNOW BRO WHATEVER YOU THINK SMELLS LIKE THE SILKY UNDERBELLY OF A NEWBORN UNICORN(important note make sure you use a FOOD SAFE oil if it doesn’t say it’s food safe/food grade don’t use it!) GRASP THE BOTTLE FIRMLY, SCREAM LIKE A VICTORIOUS PTERODACTYL, AND DROP 1-4 DROPS OF THAT SWEET SMELLING LIQUID IN THERE. I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS RIGHT THERE BECAUSE IT IS THE HEATING VESSEL FOR YOUR GLORIOUS LIPSTICK THAT’S RIGHT LIKE A VIKING WARLORD YOU ARE GOING TO USE A DOUBLE BOILER. SO GET A SAUCEPAN AND HEAT SOME WATER, THEN PLOP THAT SWEET SMELLING BOWL OF OIL AND WAX ON TOP OF THAT STEAMY WATER LIKE THE COLLISION OF YOUR OTP IN A BAD FANFIC OH YEAH. STIR THAT SHIT UNTIL EVERYTHING IS MELTY AND SMOOTH YOU DON’T WANT TO RUIN YOUR SPOONS SO I USE A DISPOSABLE CHOPSTICK FUCK YEAH RECYCLING NOW ONCE THAT SHIT IS SOFT LIKE THE SUPPLE SKIN OF YOUR HEAVENLY BOOTY, YOU NEED SOMETHING TO POUR IT INTO WELL DAMN GOOD THING YOU PICKED UP SOME CONTACT CASES LAST TIME YOU WERE AT THE STORE OR MAYBE YOU HAVE SOME EMPTY CHAPSTICK TUBES OR JUST SOME SMALL TUPPERWARE I DON’T KNOW BUT GOSH YOU ARE SO RESOURCEFUL AND PRETTY YOU DESERVE NICE LIPSTICK LIKE THIS ALSO TAKE SOME TIME FOR YOU THIS WEEKEND AND NEVER FORGET HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU I’M GLAD WE HAD THAT MOMENT TOGETHER NOW BECAUSE NOTHING IS MORE METAL THAN SAFETY, TAKE A THICK HAND TOWEL OR AN OVEN MITT OR SOMETHING AND GRIP THAT BOWL OF COLORFUL GOOP AND POUR GENTLY INTO THAT RECEPTACLE YOU PROCURED. YOU WILL PROBABLY SPILL SOME BUT THAT’S OKAY YOU’RE ONLY HUMAN. POP THAT SHIT IN THE FRIDGE BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IMPATIENT MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU WANT YOUR LIPSTICK NOW GODDAMMIT AND ONCE IT HARDENS SLATHER THAT CREAMY GOODNESS ON THICK, SLIDE ON SOME SUNGLASSES, AND HEAD INTO BATTLE TO DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY CLASS DISMISSED MOTHERFUCKERS DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS. NO DO NOT FUCKING DO THIS, CRYON HAS A LOT OF FUCKING LEAD IN IT (four times more than lipstick) PLEASE JUST BUY ACTUAL LIPSTICK. There’s no lead in crayola crayons. Kids eat them. The ingredients in Crayola Crayons are: paraffin, wax, and pigment. They’re made with the understanding that some kids will eat the damn things, so the company that makes Crayons has been very very careful to use non-toxic materials, even going so far as to use a special edible glue on the paper labels. (cornstarch and water, fyi) You can eat Crayons, if you really wanted to, but frankly the flavor’s a little bland. They taste like wax. So, yeah. adding oils with a lower solidification temperature like Olive Oil or Grapeseed or Avocado, and mixing in some Shea or Coconut Butter would make a creamy crayon. Which you could use on your skin, if you wanted. Go wild, use that shit on more than just lips. Use it like theatrical makeup, paint your tits blue if you want. Or use it like paint on the walls, or paper, or canvas. It won’t dry the same way acrylic or watercolor paint will, and will remain ‘workable’ and pliable until the oil looses enough water to solidify, much like, oh, off the top of my head… oil paint. Modern oil paints are very similar to the recipe above, though usually done with Linseed oil or other inert non-organic oils. Organic oils, as they dry, can discolor, making your carefully chosen color look off. Why are some really old painting slightly yellow? Partly the varnish has yellowed, partly airborne pollutants have stained the surface, and partly the oil in the original paint has shifted color. BTW, don’t eat Linseed oil, you’ll get the runs something fierce and regret it a lot. And then you get to go to the doctor and explain why your runny poo is brightly colored. But the amount you’d ingest from lipstick made with crayons? Negligible. Now I really want to make a set of rainbow lipstick to match my rainbow collection of nail polish (which is way more toxic than crayon lipstick, too.) so what you’re saying is i could buy a fuckton of grey crayns and have grey body paint i think i know where that’s going i think we all know where that’s going
Save
Narutard goes sage mode: all 81%. 17:40 be in high SC /r9k/42628703 5 hours ago Anonymous 42628703 >be in high school, year 11 at the beginning of the year i end up befriending a fellow called Max the more i get to know him the more i find out he is a massive fighting anime nerd and absolutely loves martial arts and has even gone so far as to teach himself Tijutsu from Naruto, however no one else seems to know other than his close friends also in thia class is a bully called Sykesey who is nigh on impervious to trouble because the school gives him an easy time because his dad left trouble starts when Max knocks a test tube out of Sykseys hand by accident after class Skysey confronts Max and gives him a punch to the stomach and claps his ears and tells Max to "know your place prick" Max then utters a phrase, through his tears that i will never forget >"So begins the 5th great ninja 0 wat.Png little did i know that Max was going to conduct a all out war against Syksey after the weekend has passed, Max comes into school and tells his friends to find Syksey because "this ends today >Legit think hes going to shoot the school up or something he goes to the bathroom and returns in a black Gi and he has the makeup of fucking Hashirama Seniu whatthefuck. Jpeg. Png confronts Syksey in the dinner room courtyard Max clasps his hands together and yells "WOOD STYLE, WILLIW LIMBS JUTSU!" >Syksey doesnt seem to give a shit and throws a punch at Max feints the punch and gives him three consecutive cracks to the side with his forearms >Syksey is pissed and goes ape mode Max keeps fucking dodging Syksey and lightly slaps him each time Syksey misses >Syksey is in a blind rage after a while Syksey is slowing down Max makes more handsigns and then yells "WOOD STYLE, OAK LIMBS JUSTU" begins pummling Skysey with his fists and palms beats him so severely that Sykey begins bleeding continues to beat him until Skysey passes out Thus the first battle was concluded 7 REPLIES H+ 、11 81 % 17:40 >be in high sc rSk/42628703 AC : Anonymous 4 hours ago 42629676 >>42629543 Part Il- Tooth retrieval arc >so things were mostly quiet after the sound beating Max gave to Syksey, bar the odd n nasty look and push in the corridor (by Syksey), things were on the whole quiet this was until an unfortunate weekend where Syksey got blind drunk with his mates and someone brought up the fact that he got beat up by a "naruto kid" >Sykseys mates think this is hilarious and wind him up into a drunkern rage >Syksey sets off to find Max Actually finds the guy when hes walking home with me from a friends house Max never saw the thing coming until Syksey jumped on him and beat him with a tree branch knocked Max's two front teeth clean out Max being the tough cookie he is is laid prone on the floor with tears running down his face and blood everywhere >when Syksey is walking away Max screams the haunting words "IM NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE, DEATH REAPER SEAL JUTSU!" before passing out this time Max looses the war is far from lost though part 3 coming soon, really sorry lads, getting fucked with assignments Anonymous 3 hours ago 42630176 Part lll- reaper death seal >So after the incident in 42629676 Max has been real upset bumped his martial arts from 2/3 sessions a weeek to every the guys is going at it HARD hes been real quiet at school too, the only coherent conversation that we can get from himk is that he wants to "Be strong enough to destroy Sykseys soul" and "i cast the death seal, i cant go back now" this guy takes his Naruto shit very seriously unexpectedly Syksey decides to return to his old bullying ways and trips Max in the corridor this is it, like a coiled spring Max begins weaving hands signs and growling legit think this kid is going to have a seizure "REAPER DEATH SEAL ohfuckthisisit.png.jpeg.exe.w inrar Max begind with a two armed claw grab at Sykseys upper arms Real pimncer grip going on because Syksey lets out a yelp from this position max yells WOOD STYLE OAKEN SKIN JUTSU" proceeds to swing his noggn forward and crack Skysey right on the uupper lip and nose like a jackhammer, Max pummles Skysey with his own Teacher tried to timidly get involves "LEAVE ME WOMAN I HAVE CAST THE SEAL >Syksey is trying to flail with his legs and catches Max on the knee and wriggles free from his grip bloody and scasred Syksey tried to run >Max stands stock still and gets into a crouching position "gate of Joy, OPEN" sprints at full tilt at the fleeing Skysey >spear tackles the fella to the ground >Max then consecutivly pummels the back of the guys head with his arms and fists until iother students pull the guy off of the bullt Max has entered beast mode thus concludes the penultimate saga 5 REPLIES Anonymous 1 hour ago 42632214 The end of the 5th great ninja ar ptl as mentioned before, Syksey was given an easy time due to Over the course of year 11 and lowwer sixth form, his fa- ther returned and brought with him Sykseys older brother, Jez mow Jez is mean, real fucking nasty piece of work and knew how to get under peoples skin at this time, Max had lost a good friend to a bus accident it, despite efforts by his other reall on himself and broiled his Now when Jez learned of this he egged Syksey on to nark on Max about it after learning what Max had done too. >Syksey begins his war of attrition against max, saying nasty shit about this friend begins sending letters to Mcax's house sig dead friend just to get under Max ay at to be exact, syksey goes all out with his bastardness and tells max that his friend probably killed himself to get away from >this hits max hard, real hard finding him later i bathrooms, hes been crying a lot but he has his Senju makeup on and its running fuckinghellthisissad.png through his tyears, Max utters 'Anon, i need to end this before i loose my ninja way >shit is Ma on Naruto? he then weaves many hand igns and says, t gritted teeth "Sage art wood release, True several thousand hands 3 REPLIES Anonymous 41 minutes ago 42632680 The end of the great 5th ninja war pt II_Valley of the Friday passes when i witness the feel that was Max g through his Senju makeup cryn >he simply finds Syksey and challenges him outright max is visibly really torn up and Syksey agrees to a fight at a local recreation ground with a shit eating smug grin >Max leaves and begins to meditate in the max misses his final classes to meditate >find him after school with bloodshot eyes and redone makeup, this time he has continued his makeup down to his shoulders and collarbone >he has his black gGi on, but instead of being tied up, its hung across his shoulders with his sleeves dangling and his arms crossed on his chest thisshitisserious.config >Max seems to be in some sort of sage mode >Me and other friends decide to follow the guy >Makes his way to the rec ground where Skysey has brought two of his friends >Maxyoucantdothis>exe try to convince him out of it, theres three fuckers there, hes going to die si brought my mates with me ik think they want to fuck you up too, like your dead friend Max, dont worry youll see him soon >Max raises his hand and beckons them >Max's friend on his left lunges straight for Max >He dodges, and brings a knee up and an elbow across this kids throat Friend lets out a yelp and falls over In order to get their friend, both others rush Max,Max dodges every single fucking blow and responds by hammering them both with his orearms this goes on, the dodging and hammering until max Breaks one of Sykseys ribs Friend who fell over is back up by this time and tackles Max from behind except he doesnt, Max, in sage mode hadnt forgotten about the other friendd and swings his leg around and catches the guy square in the stomach the kid vomits and collpases >Syksey is in rage mode and lands a punch and a other friend twats Max across the ear and splits Maxs ear 4 REPLIES 26 minutes ago max with split ear provides a road of SAGE ART WOOD RELEASE, SEVERAL THOUSAND HANDS taking a small jump backwards, Max springs, full force into Skyseys other friend and floors the guy on top of him, Max relases a flurry of punches straight into the guys nose and face Max isnt stopping until, Skysey runs into Max this is it, the final fight >Skysey brings his body at full speed, trying to hit Max jumpes out of the way and brings his knee up into Sykseys >a sicken ing crunch ensues while prone on thwe floor Max mounts Syksey and begins hammerng his fists against Sykesys back an wailing and roaring through his tears, Max continues to pummel Syksey takes me and 4 of his friends to pull him off of sey while laid on the ground, Max utters '"I avenged you my friend, please rest in peace thus ended the 5th great shinobi war or 3 REPLIES Narutard goes sage mode
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homestuckpatternreference: iamthesylveon: f-e-f-e-t-a-c-a-k-e-s: gryphynshadow: silencingthedrums: zeaky: sliceofbri: DID YOU MOTHERFUCKERS REALLY THINK YOU WERE DONE WITH ME? I THINK NOT. THAT’S RIGHT IT’S THE SUGAR SCRUB CHICK BACK WITH ANOTHER FUCKING TUTORIAL. YOU BITCHES HAVE BEEN ASKING ME FOR AGES TO MAKE ANOTHER ONE OF THESE FUCKING POSTS AND IT’S FUCKING LATE SO HERE YOU GO FUCKERS WE GON LEARN SOME SHIT SO SIT DOWN AND BE QUIET SO WE ALL WANT LIPS RED AS THE BLOOD OF ANGRY MEN RIGHT AND WHO DOESN’T FUCKING LIKE ARTS AND CRAFTS AND I DON’T EVEN NEED TO TALK ABOUT HOW HARD IT IS TO FIND LIPSTICK FOR FUCKING COSPLAY SO BEHOLD THE HUMBLE CRAYON YOU LITTLE SHITS GET A CRAYON. AND NOT JUST ANY CRAYON A FUCKING CRAYOLA CRAYON DON’T EVEN TRY WITH THAT ROSEART SHIT BECAUSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RIP OUT YOUR UVULA. IF YOU WANNA GET REALLY ARTSY WHIP OUT ONE OF THESE BAD BOYS  AND BREAK UP SOME CRAYONS TO GET THE PERFECT SHADE OF BLUE GREEN FOR THAT BADASS COSPLAY YOU’VE GOT PICKED OUT BUT MARK MY WORDS NO MORE THAN ONE FUCKING CRAYON’S WORTH OF BITS BETTER GO INTO THIS FUCKING BOWL. SPEAKING OF WHICH, YOU NEED SOME OTHER FUCKING SHIT IN THERE SO GO GET SOME OIL. THE GOOD STUFF. I’M TALKING EVOO BITCHES THE VIRGINAL BLOOD OF THE MOST TENDER OLIVES IN ALL THE LAND. SQUEEZE SOME OF THAT HEAVENLY LUBRICANT INTO YOUR BOWL, ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON, THAT’LL DO PIG, THAT’LL DO. NOW GO FIND SOME SHEA BUTTER OR COCONUT OIL AND GLOP ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON OF THAT IN YOUR BOWL. NOW GO TO YOUR MAGICAL CABINET OF WONDERS AND FIND SOME NICE SMELLING SHIT. COULD BE VANILLA EXTRACT. COULD BE LAVENDER OIL. I DON’T KNOW BRO WHATEVER YOU THINK SMELLS LIKE THE SILKY UNDERBELLY OF A NEWBORN UNICORN(important note make sure you use a FOOD SAFE oil if it doesn’t say it’s food safe/food grade don’t use it!) GRASP THE BOTTLE FIRMLY, SCREAM LIKE A VICTORIOUS PTERODACTYL, AND DROP 1-4 DROPS OF THAT SWEET SMELLING LIQUID IN THERE. I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS RIGHT THERE BECAUSE IT IS THE HEATING VESSEL FOR YOUR GLORIOUS LIPSTICK THAT’S RIGHT LIKE A VIKING WARLORD YOU ARE GOING TO USE A DOUBLE BOILER. SO GET A SAUCEPAN AND HEAT SOME WATER, THEN PLOP THAT SWEET SMELLING BOWL OF OIL AND WAX ON TOP OF THAT STEAMY WATER LIKE THE COLLISION OF YOUR OTP IN A BAD FANFIC OH YEAH. STIR THAT SHIT UNTIL EVERYTHING IS MELTY AND SMOOTH YOU DON’T WANT TO RUIN YOUR SPOONS SO I USE A DISPOSABLE CHOPSTICK FUCK YEAH RECYCLING NOW ONCE THAT SHIT IS SOFT LIKE THE SUPPLE SKIN OF YOUR HEAVENLY BOOTY, YOU NEED SOMETHING TO POUR IT INTO WELL DAMN GOOD THING YOU PICKED UP SOME CONTACT CASES LAST TIME YOU WERE AT THE STORE OR MAYBE YOU HAVE SOME EMPTY CHAPSTICK TUBES OR JUST SOME SMALL TUPPERWARE I DON’T KNOW BUT GOSH YOU ARE SO RESOURCEFUL AND PRETTY YOU DESERVE NICE LIPSTICK LIKE THIS ALSO TAKE SOME TIME FOR YOU THIS WEEKEND AND NEVER FORGET HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU I’M GLAD WE HAD THAT MOMENT TOGETHER NOW BECAUSE NOTHING IS MORE METAL THAN SAFETY, TAKE A THICK HAND TOWEL OR AN OVEN MITT OR SOMETHING AND GRIP THAT BOWL OF COLORFUL GOOP AND POUR GENTLY INTO THAT RECEPTACLE YOU PROCURED. YOU WILL PROBABLY SPILL SOME BUT THAT’S OKAY YOU’RE ONLY HUMAN. POP THAT SHIT IN THE FRIDGE BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IMPATIENT MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU WANT YOUR LIPSTICK NOW GODDAMMIT AND ONCE IT HARDENS SLATHER THAT CREAMY GOODNESS ON THICK, SLIDE ON SOME SUNGLASSES, AND HEAD INTO BATTLE TO DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY CLASS DISMISSED MOTHERFUCKERS DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS. NO DO NOT FUCKING DO THIS, CRYON HAS A LOT OF FUCKING LEAD IN IT (four times more than lipstick) PLEASE JUST BUY ACTUAL LIPSTICK. There’s no lead in crayola crayons. Kids eat them. The ingredients in Crayola Crayons are: paraffin, wax, and pigment. They’re made with the understanding that some kids will eat the damn things, so the company that makes Crayons has been very very careful to use non-toxic materials, even going so far as to use a special edible glue on the paper labels. (cornstarch and water, fyi) You can eat Crayons, if you really wanted to, but frankly the flavor’s a little bland. They taste like wax. So, yeah. adding oils with a lower solidification temperature like Olive Oil or Grapeseed or Avocado, and mixing in some Shea or Coconut Butter would make a creamy crayon. Which you could use on your skin, if you wanted. Go wild, use that shit on more than just lips. Use it like theatrical makeup, paint your tits blue if you want. Or use it like paint on the walls, or paper, or canvas. It won’t dry the same way acrylic or watercolor paint will, and will remain ‘workable’ and pliable until the oil looses enough water to solidify, much like, oh, off the top of my head… oil paint. Modern oil paints are very similar to the recipe above, though usually done with Linseed oil or other inert non-organic oils. Organic oils, as they dry, can discolor, making your carefully chosen color look off. Why are some really old painting slightly yellow? Partly the varnish has yellowed, partly airborne pollutants have stained the surface, and partly the oil in the original paint has shifted color. BTW, don’t eat Linseed oil, you’ll get the runs something fierce and regret it a lot. And then you get to go to the doctor and explain why your runny poo is brightly colored. But the amount you’d ingest from lipstick made with crayons? Negligible. Now I really want to make a set of rainbow lipstick to match my rainbow collection of nail polish (which is way more toxic than crayon lipstick, too.) so what you’re saying is i could buy a fuckton of grey crayns and have grey body paint i think i know where that’s going i think we all know where that’s going : Crayola e With Preferred by Teachers ar E CRAYONS 24 homestuckpatternreference: iamthesylveon: f-e-f-e-t-a-c-a-k-e-s: gryphynshadow: silencingthedrums: zeaky: sliceofbri: DID YOU MOTHERFUCKERS REALLY THINK YOU WERE DONE WITH ME? I THINK NOT. THAT’S RIGHT IT’S THE SUGAR SCRUB CHICK BACK WITH ANOTHER FUCKING TUTORIAL. YOU BITCHES HAVE BEEN ASKING ME FOR AGES TO MAKE ANOTHER ONE OF THESE FUCKING POSTS AND IT’S FUCKING LATE SO HERE YOU GO FUCKERS WE GON LEARN SOME SHIT SO SIT DOWN AND BE QUIET SO WE ALL WANT LIPS RED AS THE BLOOD OF ANGRY MEN RIGHT AND WHO DOESN’T FUCKING LIKE ARTS AND CRAFTS AND I DON’T EVEN NEED TO TALK ABOUT HOW HARD IT IS TO FIND LIPSTICK FOR FUCKING COSPLAY SO BEHOLD THE HUMBLE CRAYON YOU LITTLE SHITS GET A CRAYON. AND NOT JUST ANY CRAYON A FUCKING CRAYOLA CRAYON DON’T EVEN TRY WITH THAT ROSEART SHIT BECAUSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RIP OUT YOUR UVULA. IF YOU WANNA GET REALLY ARTSY WHIP OUT ONE OF THESE BAD BOYS  AND BREAK UP SOME CRAYONS TO GET THE PERFECT SHADE OF BLUE GREEN FOR THAT BADASS COSPLAY YOU’VE GOT PICKED OUT BUT MARK MY WORDS NO MORE THAN ONE FUCKING CRAYON’S WORTH OF BITS BETTER GO INTO THIS FUCKING BOWL. SPEAKING OF WHICH, YOU NEED SOME OTHER FUCKING SHIT IN THERE SO GO GET SOME OIL. THE GOOD STUFF. I’M TALKING EVOO BITCHES THE VIRGINAL BLOOD OF THE MOST TENDER OLIVES IN ALL THE LAND. SQUEEZE SOME OF THAT HEAVENLY LUBRICANT INTO YOUR BOWL, ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON, THAT’LL DO PIG, THAT’LL DO. NOW GO FIND SOME SHEA BUTTER OR COCONUT OIL AND GLOP ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON OF THAT IN YOUR BOWL. NOW GO TO YOUR MAGICAL CABINET OF WONDERS AND FIND SOME NICE SMELLING SHIT. COULD BE VANILLA EXTRACT. COULD BE LAVENDER OIL. I DON’T KNOW BRO WHATEVER YOU THINK SMELLS LIKE THE SILKY UNDERBELLY OF A NEWBORN UNICORN(important note make sure you use a FOOD SAFE oil if it doesn’t say it’s food safe/food grade don’t use it!) GRASP THE BOTTLE FIRMLY, SCREAM LIKE A VICTORIOUS PTERODACTYL, AND DROP 1-4 DROPS OF THAT SWEET SMELLING LIQUID IN THERE. I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS RIGHT THERE BECAUSE IT IS THE HEATING VESSEL FOR YOUR GLORIOUS LIPSTICK THAT’S RIGHT LIKE A VIKING WARLORD YOU ARE GOING TO USE A DOUBLE BOILER. SO GET A SAUCEPAN AND HEAT SOME WATER, THEN PLOP THAT SWEET SMELLING BOWL OF OIL AND WAX ON TOP OF THAT STEAMY WATER LIKE THE COLLISION OF YOUR OTP IN A BAD FANFIC OH YEAH. STIR THAT SHIT UNTIL EVERYTHING IS MELTY AND SMOOTH YOU DON’T WANT TO RUIN YOUR SPOONS SO I USE A DISPOSABLE CHOPSTICK FUCK YEAH RECYCLING NOW ONCE THAT SHIT IS SOFT LIKE THE SUPPLE SKIN OF YOUR HEAVENLY BOOTY, YOU NEED SOMETHING TO POUR IT INTO WELL DAMN GOOD THING YOU PICKED UP SOME CONTACT CASES LAST TIME YOU WERE AT THE STORE OR MAYBE YOU HAVE SOME EMPTY CHAPSTICK TUBES OR JUST SOME SMALL TUPPERWARE I DON’T KNOW BUT GOSH YOU ARE SO RESOURCEFUL AND PRETTY YOU DESERVE NICE LIPSTICK LIKE THIS ALSO TAKE SOME TIME FOR YOU THIS WEEKEND AND NEVER FORGET HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU I’M GLAD WE HAD THAT MOMENT TOGETHER NOW BECAUSE NOTHING IS MORE METAL THAN SAFETY, TAKE A THICK HAND TOWEL OR AN OVEN MITT OR SOMETHING AND GRIP THAT BOWL OF COLORFUL GOOP AND POUR GENTLY INTO THAT RECEPTACLE YOU PROCURED. YOU WILL PROBABLY SPILL SOME BUT THAT’S OKAY YOU’RE ONLY HUMAN. POP THAT SHIT IN THE FRIDGE BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IMPATIENT MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU WANT YOUR LIPSTICK NOW GODDAMMIT AND ONCE IT HARDENS SLATHER THAT CREAMY GOODNESS ON THICK, SLIDE ON SOME SUNGLASSES, AND HEAD INTO BATTLE TO DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY CLASS DISMISSED MOTHERFUCKERS DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS. NO DO NOT FUCKING DO THIS, CRYON HAS A LOT OF FUCKING LEAD IN IT (four times more than lipstick) PLEASE JUST BUY ACTUAL LIPSTICK. There’s no lead in crayola crayons. Kids eat them. The ingredients in Crayola Crayons are: paraffin, wax, and pigment. They’re made with the understanding that some kids will eat the damn things, so the company that makes Crayons has been very very careful to use non-toxic materials, even going so far as to use a special edible glue on the paper labels. (cornstarch and water, fyi) You can eat Crayons, if you really wanted to, but frankly the flavor’s a little bland. They taste like wax. So, yeah. adding oils with a lower solidification temperature like Olive Oil or Grapeseed or Avocado, and mixing in some Shea or Coconut Butter would make a creamy crayon. Which you could use on your skin, if you wanted. Go wild, use that shit on more than just lips. Use it like theatrical makeup, paint your tits blue if you want. Or use it like paint on the walls, or paper, or canvas. It won’t dry the same way acrylic or watercolor paint will, and will remain ‘workable’ and pliable until the oil looses enough water to solidify, much like, oh, off the top of my head… oil paint. Modern oil paints are very similar to the recipe above, though usually done with Linseed oil or other inert non-organic oils. Organic oils, as they dry, can discolor, making your carefully chosen color look off. Why are some really old painting slightly yellow? Partly the varnish has yellowed, partly airborne pollutants have stained the surface, and partly the oil in the original paint has shifted color. BTW, don’t eat Linseed oil, you’ll get the runs something fierce and regret it a lot. And then you get to go to the doctor and explain why your runny poo is brightly colored. But the amount you’d ingest from lipstick made with crayons? Negligible. Now I really want to make a set of rainbow lipstick to match my rainbow collection of nail polish (which is way more toxic than crayon lipstick, too.) so what you’re saying is i could buy a fuckton of grey crayns and have grey body paint i think i know where that’s going i think we all know where that’s going
Save
-Theory- - This will contain minor spoilers for Civil War and Spider-Man: Homecoming - So let's start. So following the events of Captain America: Civil War, Cap (Spoiler Alert) leaves his Shield with Tony Stark after his line "You don't deserve it. My father made that Shield!" So this raises the question. "What weapon will Cap have in Infinity War?" Well most think Tony will just give Cap his Shield back. Which would be stupid honestly, I mean Tony's not gonna forgive a fight like that just in an instant. (At least he shouldn't. Not right away) - "So, here's my brilliant theory." So if you look on my first slide you'll see two pictures of Caps Prototype Shield (Spoiler Alert) that was mentioned in Spider-Man: Homecoming. (Top pic is from Avengers bottom from Iron Man 2) So obviously Tony has been working on a new Shield for Cap ever since they found him in the Ice. But in Spider-Man: Homecoming, Happy said (something like this) "Cap's new prototype Shield." So I think it's safe to assume that Tony finished whatever he made. Now obviously he's not just going to hand it over to Cap after Civil War. (That and he probably has no clue where he is) So here's were Comic Book Accuracy comes in Now the Russos already borrowed this element in Civil War, but I think it's worth a redo. So in the Comics Cap Looses his Shield (Slide 3) and Sharon Carter brings him a photonic energy Shield. Now this Shield can change into an energy staff. Now in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Seasons 3 & 4 Phil Coulson uses an Energy Shield (which he does in the comics as well) So we know the technology exists. Now add a little Tony Stark design to it. "Bing Bang Boom." (I like how I keep using CA: TFA Quotes) So, Tony designs Cap this Shield bc he's Tony. He likes to make stuff. (Iron Man 3) Sharon Carter steals this new tech brings it to Steve. Also one piece of Evidence I found to support this is in the Leaked Avengers: Infinity War trailer, Cap is Catching an energy staff. Now whether this is just an attackers weapon, or his New Shield it's unclear. But he is holding an energy staff. - Comment your thoughts on this theory below. (This could be 100% wrong): Infinity War Theory -Theory- - This will contain minor spoilers for Civil War and Spider-Man: Homecoming - So let's start. So following the events of Captain America: Civil War, Cap (Spoiler Alert) leaves his Shield with Tony Stark after his line "You don't deserve it. My father made that Shield!" So this raises the question. "What weapon will Cap have in Infinity War?" Well most think Tony will just give Cap his Shield back. Which would be stupid honestly, I mean Tony's not gonna forgive a fight like that just in an instant. (At least he shouldn't. Not right away) - "So, here's my brilliant theory." So if you look on my first slide you'll see two pictures of Caps Prototype Shield (Spoiler Alert) that was mentioned in Spider-Man: Homecoming. (Top pic is from Avengers bottom from Iron Man 2) So obviously Tony has been working on a new Shield for Cap ever since they found him in the Ice. But in Spider-Man: Homecoming, Happy said (something like this) "Cap's new prototype Shield." So I think it's safe to assume that Tony finished whatever he made. Now obviously he's not just going to hand it over to Cap after Civil War. (That and he probably has no clue where he is) So here's were Comic Book Accuracy comes in Now the Russos already borrowed this element in Civil War, but I think it's worth a redo. So in the Comics Cap Looses his Shield (Slide 3) and Sharon Carter brings him a photonic energy Shield. Now this Shield can change into an energy staff. Now in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Seasons 3 & 4 Phil Coulson uses an Energy Shield (which he does in the comics as well) So we know the technology exists. Now add a little Tony Stark design to it. "Bing Bang Boom." (I like how I keep using CA: TFA Quotes) So, Tony designs Cap this Shield bc he's Tony. He likes to make stuff. (Iron Man 3) Sharon Carter steals this new tech brings it to Steve. Also one piece of Evidence I found to support this is in the Leaked Avengers: Infinity War trailer, Cap is Catching an energy staff. Now whether this is just an attackers weapon, or his New Shield it's unclear. But he is holding an energy staff. - Comment your thoughts on this theory below. (This could be 100% wrong)

-Theory- - This will contain minor spoilers for Civil War and Spider-Man: Homecoming - So let's start. So following the events of Captain...

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<p>Possible inside trading! via /r/MemeEconomy <a href="http://ift.tt/2tmZQZE">http://ift.tt/2tmZQZE</a></p>: Board /pol Politically Incorrect Y Settings Home Anonymous (ID: 63A6W1wJ) 07/05/17(Wed)01:21:06 No.132439366 Alright folks, the time has come. It's time to stand up for ourselves and our way of life, and to finally 46 KB JPG kill the lying mass of shit that is us, and together we will win. >Here is the plan for Operation: Autism Storm CNN. The next meme war is upon 1. UNITE THE PEOPLE- Right now, Reddit and r/TheDonald are our allies. We may not like them but we don't have to. We are fighting a common enemy. Imagine the US/Britain being allies with the Soviets during WW2 I guess. We must unite the other sites as well, as this is an attack on the internet way of life as a whole and we will need everyone in order to win this. We are no longer 4channers or redditors, we are the Internet. 2. FULL SCALE MEME WAR- Everyone should be producing as many anti-CNN memes as possible and spreading it to all of the normie sites and whatnot. Remember: nothing too racist or edgy, but Pepe should be good because CNN looses its shit over him, and that can make them look like even bigger retards 3. CUT OFF THE MONEY- We need to plan some way to stop their advertisers from advertising orn CNN. Another anon gathered a list of all of their advertisers, we need to plan either a boycott of some kind or something similar to that in order to make CNN broke. 4. REMOVE THE BULLSHIT- Discredit every journalist at CNN. No mercy on them. By seeing the shitstorm we are about to bring onto CNN, hopefully other MSM outlets will correct themselves. 5. LEGAL STUFF- If CNN does in fact doxx this person, we need to help in every way possiblea court case against CNN. Alright folks LETS FUCKING DO THIS SHIT <p>Possible inside trading! via /r/MemeEconomy <a href="http://ift.tt/2tmZQZE">http://ift.tt/2tmZQZE</a></p>
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🇺🇸 This black Trump supporter just spectacularly let loose on California's sanctuary cities. SPITTING 🔥🔥🔥She is WOKE!!!! 🇺🇸 Check out our store. Link in bio. 🇺🇸 LIKE our Facebook page 🇺🇸 Subscribe to our YouTube Channel 🇺🇸 Visit our website for more News and Information. 🇺🇸 www.UncleSamsMisguidedChildren.com 🇺🇸 Tag and Join our Misguided Family @unclesamsmisguidedchildren Video Cred: @minorityredefine.inc Use code USMCNATION10 for 10% off MisguidedLife MisguidedNation USMCNation Apparel ProGun 2A Tactical MAGA BackTheBlue latino Gun Ammo Conservative USMC airforce army navy republican Veterans K9 veteran pewpew murica merica america infantry immigration Trump.: BLACK TRUMP SUPPORTER LETS LOOSE: "SANCTUARY CITIES ARE RACIST!" KATHATN STEINLETI Again I say, sanctuary cities are racist! 🇺🇸 This black Trump supporter just spectacularly let loose on California's sanctuary cities. SPITTING 🔥🔥🔥She is WOKE!!!! 🇺🇸 Check out our store. Link in bio. 🇺🇸 LIKE our Facebook page 🇺🇸 Subscribe to our YouTube Channel 🇺🇸 Visit our website for more News and Information. 🇺🇸 www.UncleSamsMisguidedChildren.com 🇺🇸 Tag and Join our Misguided Family @unclesamsmisguidedchildren Video Cred: @minorityredefine.inc Use code USMCNATION10 for 10% off MisguidedLife MisguidedNation USMCNation Apparel ProGun 2A Tactical MAGA BackTheBlue latino Gun Ammo Conservative USMC airforce army navy republican Veterans K9 veteran pewpew murica merica america infantry immigration Trump.
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{ funnytumblr textposts funnytextpost tumblr funnytumblrpost tumblrfunny followme tumblrfunny textpost tumblrpost haha}: my teacher commended me for taking such good notes today but i was really just writing the lyrics to real slim shady solely out of memory Unit N lesson world nistory artcn1 or nave your attentmon pease, mau nave uour please. null the real slim snady please stand up. Lrcpoar wilt the real snm snady pease stand up we're gonna nave a propiem nere, yall act like you've nevC nnite person reforc jaws all on the floor like Pam ar than DC for thcy first were alvorsed inrontin mer over an! its me return ot the aw Watt way you're kidding,ne alan't vst sau nnat l tnink ne did, ala ne? and Dr. Dre said, nothing idiots Dr. Dre's dead, nt's locked in my basement na feminist Wonten love Eminem cnicka cnicka cnikka slim sna of him look at nim naving around grabicing hits you enon nnat flipping tnc you know who yean put nc so cute tnougn ydan got a coupe of screws in my neda loose, but no worse man wnat 5 going on in your parent's bedroom sometimes want to gcr on N and ju let loose pur can't it's cool for Tom Green to nump a dead moose, mu pum is on your s, my wm is on your lips and if i'm lucky you miqmt ST give a little kiss, and that's tnc message tna we deliver to little kids and expect them not 10 know Wmat a woman's clitorus is! ot course they gonna know wnat is ny tne tlme they mit 4m grade they got the discovery cnannel don't thcy we ain't nothina bur mammals, nell some cannipals wno cur othcr people open like cantaloupes put if We can nump dead animals and ante loupes and thKre's a reason riny one man and another man can't clope. but WOU teel like teel { funnytumblr textposts funnytextpost tumblr funnytumblrpost tumblrfunny followme tumblrfunny textpost tumblrpost haha}

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Awesome job 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 Repost @star4makeup ・・・ Face: @elfcosmetics primer and MOM Foundation: @blackopalbeauty True Color Black Walnut and Hazelnut All over and Truly Topaz to highlight Setting Powder: @bennyemakeup Ebony and Sienna loose translucent powder All over and Buff under the eyes Eyeshadows: @anastasiabeverlyhills peach sorbet and rich velvet blended with @maccosmetics saddle Brows: Anastasia brow palette Ebony and Granite Highlight: @anastasiabeverlyhills Ultimate Glow Kit Blush: @narsissist Seduction and @maccosmetics Devil Lips: @rubykissescosmetics Bare Nude with mac chestnut lip liner Face Set with MAC Fix plus before and after application 😍 ABSOLUTELY NO FILTER OR EDITS AND NO CONCEALER: ere, eir Awesome job 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 Repost @star4makeup ・・・ Face: @elfcosmetics primer and MOM Foundation: @blackopalbeauty True Color Black Walnut and Hazelnut All over and Truly Topaz to highlight Setting Powder: @bennyemakeup Ebony and Sienna loose translucent powder All over and Buff under the eyes Eyeshadows: @anastasiabeverlyhills peach sorbet and rich velvet blended with @maccosmetics saddle Brows: Anastasia brow palette Ebony and Granite Highlight: @anastasiabeverlyhills Ultimate Glow Kit Blush: @narsissist Seduction and @maccosmetics Devil Lips: @rubykissescosmetics Bare Nude with mac chestnut lip liner Face Set with MAC Fix plus before and after application 😍 ABSOLUTELY NO FILTER OR EDITS AND NO CONCEALER

Awesome job 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 Repost @star4makeup ・・・ Face: @elfcosmetics primer and MOM Foundation: @blackopalbeauty True Color Black Walnut and...

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Oh so u just gon shower...without smash...like that's ok. Ok I see u. What did I do. Do I not treat u right. Do I not eat the Punani like it's a Baskin Robin Oreo sundae with whip cream and a cherry, what. Do I not take u to nice restaurants, what. Do I not chop that ass down dutifully and with sincerity, what. What I do. What? U said u had to pee? And u ain't want me to see that? Girl is u crazy? The shower is where people pee! It's like a big wide ass open urinal where u can't miss! U embarrassed that u pee where people suppose to pee?! LOLOLOL baby u adorable. Pee. Be comfortable. Let loose the juice. WHOA DERR...I didn't say pee on me...I'm a pervert, just not that kind 🤗. But nah go head pee. What? Now it's my turn to pee? Nah baby I already peed in the toilet I ain't gotta pee fawkumean 😘😂😂😂: When you don't let the cat in the bathroom with you. @Drsmashlove Oh so u just gon shower...without smash...like that's ok. Ok I see u. What did I do. Do I not treat u right. Do I not eat the Punani like it's a Baskin Robin Oreo sundae with whip cream and a cherry, what. Do I not take u to nice restaurants, what. Do I not chop that ass down dutifully and with sincerity, what. What I do. What? U said u had to pee? And u ain't want me to see that? Girl is u crazy? The shower is where people pee! It's like a big wide ass open urinal where u can't miss! U embarrassed that u pee where people suppose to pee?! LOLOLOL baby u adorable. Pee. Be comfortable. Let loose the juice. WHOA DERR...I didn't say pee on me...I'm a pervert, just not that kind 🤗. But nah go head pee. What? Now it's my turn to pee? Nah baby I already peed in the toilet I ain't gotta pee fawkumean 😘😂😂😂
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[8x10 Recap] •Bonnie wanted to make Caroline breakfast in bed aw friendship goals 😍 •Damon thinks he's in hell and is suffering ugh my poor boy 😭 •Caroline wants to do anything to help Damon I'm crying •Caroline and Bonnie went into Damon's head and met Henry (like in 7x10!) at the Salvatore house but it turns out that Damon died as a human omg •Caroline and Bonnie also met Vicki 😳 Damon basically didn't exist anymore and that's why she was still alive •Caroline saw her mom again and talked to her I'M CRYING 😭😭😭 •But Liz didn't know that Care is a vampire and tortured her like her dad did in season 3 nooo 😭 •Caroline said she forgave Damon because he was the only person who knew and understood how much it hurt to loose her mother OH MY GOD MY DAROLINE HEART 😍😭 •Bonnie sees her grams again AWW 😭 •Of course Matt would never help Damon but I can understand him somehow •Seline wanted Matt to ring the bell not only to destroy Sybil but to destroy the whole Mystic Falls what even 😳 and Stefan wants to do that wtf??? •Stefan compelled Matt to forgive Damon, otherwise he would ring the bell 😳 •It made me happy and sad to see Tyler in Damon's head and I want him back 😔 •Of course Stefan was the one who had to talk to Damon 😪 But it's Damon who had to forgive Stefan so he could get out of his mind •Damon "killed" Stefan, saved Matt's life and Mystic Falls YAYYYY THE REAL HIM IS BACK 👏🏻 •Damon apologized to Matt for killing Vicki and Matt forgave him, I'm happy that finally happened 😌 •Caroline locked Stefan up in the Salvatore cellar and wants to get him back because she will never give up on him I told you 🙌🏻 •Bonnie said that Damon was under Sybil's control and it wasn't his fault what he did WELL FINALLY SOMEONE SAID IT 👏🏻 •Damon remembered the letter he wrote to Bonnie and then he apologized to her for leaving her and they hugged OH MY GOD MY BAMON HEART I'M SO HAPPY THAT THEY ARE FRIENDS AGAIN 😭 •After all, Sybil was actually a good villain, also Seline, and I liked the idea of sirens. But I'm glad that they are dead now, even if it's not fair of Cade to let them burn in hell, because they've suffered so much for him already!: ORE [8x10 Recap] •Bonnie wanted to make Caroline breakfast in bed aw friendship goals 😍 •Damon thinks he's in hell and is suffering ugh my poor boy 😭 •Caroline wants to do anything to help Damon I'm crying •Caroline and Bonnie went into Damon's head and met Henry (like in 7x10!) at the Salvatore house but it turns out that Damon died as a human omg •Caroline and Bonnie also met Vicki 😳 Damon basically didn't exist anymore and that's why she was still alive •Caroline saw her mom again and talked to her I'M CRYING 😭😭😭 •But Liz didn't know that Care is a vampire and tortured her like her dad did in season 3 nooo 😭 •Caroline said she forgave Damon because he was the only person who knew and understood how much it hurt to loose her mother OH MY GOD MY DAROLINE HEART 😍😭 •Bonnie sees her grams again AWW 😭 •Of course Matt would never help Damon but I can understand him somehow •Seline wanted Matt to ring the bell not only to destroy Sybil but to destroy the whole Mystic Falls what even 😳 and Stefan wants to do that wtf??? •Stefan compelled Matt to forgive Damon, otherwise he would ring the bell 😳 •It made me happy and sad to see Tyler in Damon's head and I want him back 😔 •Of course Stefan was the one who had to talk to Damon 😪 But it's Damon who had to forgive Stefan so he could get out of his mind •Damon "killed" Stefan, saved Matt's life and Mystic Falls YAYYYY THE REAL HIM IS BACK 👏🏻 •Damon apologized to Matt for killing Vicki and Matt forgave him, I'm happy that finally happened 😌 •Caroline locked Stefan up in the Salvatore cellar and wants to get him back because she will never give up on him I told you 🙌🏻 •Bonnie said that Damon was under Sybil's control and it wasn't his fault what he did WELL FINALLY SOMEONE SAID IT 👏🏻 •Damon remembered the letter he wrote to Bonnie and then he apologized to her for leaving her and they hugged OH MY GOD MY BAMON HEART I'M SO HAPPY THAT THEY ARE FRIENDS AGAIN 😭 •After all, Sybil was actually a good villain, also Seline, and I liked the idea of sirens. But I'm glad that they are dead now, even if it's not fair of Cade to let them burn in hell, because they've suffered so much for him already!

[8x10 Recap] •Bonnie wanted to make Caroline breakfast in bed aw friendship goals 😍 •Damon thinks he's in hell and is suffering ugh my po...

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