You Called
You Called

You Called

Age
Age

Age

Heisenberger
Heisenberger

Heisenberger

Methed
Methed

Methed

Cyanide And Happieness
Cyanide And Happieness

Cyanide And Happieness

Meme Smile
Meme Smile

Meme Smile

crystallization
 crystallization

crystallization

no idea
 no idea

no idea

drugged
 drugged

drugged

crystals
 crystals

crystals

πŸ”₯ | Latest

Af, Ass, and Bless Up: After following the U.S. Marines for miles, they decided to picked him up.. @DrSmashlove I got a lot of comments and DMs from pretty ladies from Idaho saying that everything I said about Montana was true. A few observations: (1) It is taking all the willpower in my soul to not call yall "Idahoes". I know. I KNOW. THAT SHIT IS HELLA DISRESPECTFUL. WHICH I WHY I NEVER USE "slut", "whore", or "hoe" PEJORATIVELY. But dammit "Idahoes" has such a fun ring to it πŸ˜«πŸ˜‚. (2) I think it's adorable AF that u Idahoes (SOMEBODY SAVE ME πŸ˜•) claim Montana. I don't blame y'all. Honestly? Other than Chicago...Illinois, Indiana and Ohio are one state. You drive across them bitches and it's zero difference. Same flat ass earth. Same couple two three restaurants at the rest stops. Coulda called the shit Illiano - in fact let's keep it 600 that name sound better anyway πŸ˜‚. (3) My follower @emmyxlu who lives in Idaho or, as she calls it, "Montana's redneck cousin", advised me as follows: "Fun facts Montana didn't even have a speed limit on highways until about 20 years ago when the federal government forced them to! The speed limit was 'drive at a speed that is reasonable and prudent'." HOW COULD U NOT LOVE MONTANA. U COULD OWN A BUGATTI AND DRIVE DAT BIH 268 MPH AND AS LONG AS U CAN SPLAIN TO THE JUDGE THAT U WERE ACTING REASONABLY AND WITH PRUDENCE, NO TICKET πŸ˜‚. GOD BLESS MONTANA. AF πŸ˜πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ [p.s. Emmy just wrote me saying "Montana is the country boy that managed to go to college, and Idaho is the kid who blows up in a meth lab accident at 25." THAT'S ALL I NEEDED TO HEAR, IDAHOES I'M COMING TO U IN THE NEXT 12 CALENDAR MONTHS - I INTEND TO EAT LOTS OF POTATOES AND HAVE A LOT OF ADVENTURES SO YALL BETTER IDAHOE IT UP WHEN SMASH ARRIVE BLESS UP πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚]

I got a lot of comments and DMs from pretty ladies from Idaho saying that everything I said about Montana was true. A few observations: (1) ...

Af, Alive, and Ass: True Love, 13 Years Later. @DrSmashlove People visit Chicago from smaller towns and be like "omg people in Chicago drive crazy", "wow, y'all honk so much, why you always honking", "sheesh Chicago drivers are nuts they always speeding why they so reckless." Ok. Nah. Hell nah. Y'all ain't seen crazy TILL U BEEN TO MF MONTANA πŸ˜‚. See in Chicago ALL highways got a 55 miles per hour speed limit. So somebody go 80 and they look crazy AF. In Montana tho? The SPEED LIMIT IS 80 😫. Ok...so what if u go 80? That's the speed limit, u good - right? Bruh. The person behind u won't honk. They won't press u. They will simply drive like they attached to your bumper for a few miles. Then they will pass u by swerving left into ONCOMING TRAFFIC ON A HIGHWAY THAT RUNS ALONG A CLIFF OF A MOUNTAIN AND PASS U. U look over and u think u finna see a crazy ass redneck with a bad mullet, meth teeth, and death wish. Nah. U see a grandma wearing a pink tank top and she got a nice tan sipping a Starbucks coffee grinning at u as she pass u going NINETY FUCKING FIVE. And she got a semi truck coming right at her and she smiling at him and he smiling back at her and then he smiling at YOU like "IF HE DIES HE DIES" *Russian dude from Rocky voice. AF*. What's crazy is u could have to be somewhere 200 miles away and as long as U don't get eaten alive by a rattlesnake at a rest stop ... πŸ€— ... that's two hours of driving flat. In Chicago that's three hours easy. U feel me? I'm not mad at this speedracing-ass, colossal, somewhat inconsequential oversized land mass of a state. So to conclude: Montana girls got fat asses and drive they white Denali SUVs like they Italian race car drivers WHAT'S NOT TO LOVE BLESS UP πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

People visit Chicago from smaller towns and be like "omg people in Chicago drive crazy", "wow, y'all honk so much, why you always honking", ...