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Apparently, Ass, and Crying: Anonymous 08/16/16(Tue)12:24:09 No.699763279 be fat >go to /fit/ and find a solution >main problem is i eat like a dumpster apparently things with loads of fiber is going to 211 KB JPG save my filthy soul "Fiber is digested slowly, leaving you feeling full longer, and helps with digestion" go out and buy two boxes of fiber-heavy breakfast bars the first day i have fiber bars for breakfast, lunch and a lot of snacks i dont shit that day next day i fiber myself up even more i dont shit that day either >fiber jesus is surely working his magic in my colon can feel the pounds dropping off because im not very hungry anymore i dont shit the third day >i dont shit the fourth day thefinaldaydawns.mp3 si have my morning coffee and feel my insides rumble in that familiar way the second i hit the toilet the weirdest fart in the world exits me it's whistling just a thin, continuous airstream of fart that smells like grandpapas coffin >no sound other than the whistling hiss suddenly stops the hole is plugged SOS >this shit is so solid it feels like i'm giving anal birth to Dwayne "The rock" Johnson >hang on to the shower curtain and pray the rock is shot out of my asshole at mach speed >my entire ass is covered in toilet water >now the fun begins a fart that could do more damage to thee ozone layer than aerosol ever did is shooting shit bullets out of me solid and prefectly round nuggets the smell is killing me blacking out the thuds of nuggets shooting around the bowl propelled by my insane fiber flatulence is giving me war flashbacks iwasntevenin'nam.jpeg my guts are yelling in german sounds like a moose in heat lives in my belly most of the shit isn't even digested at this point just forced out by all the gas that had been building up to my throat after an hour it finally seems to be over sim shivering and crying both legs collapse as i try to stand up >my stomach hitting the bathroom tiles forces one last trumpet gondorcallsforaid.rar shakily wipe my ass completely clean feniczoroark: larjmarge: itsperegrine: the-mighty-birdy: carolina-viking: th3laugh1ngt0mat0: carolina-viking: Holy fucking shit I CANT BREATHE I HAVE TEARS STREAMING DOWN MY FACE Pretty sure this has the most notes of any of my posts gondorcallsforaid.rar I’m in a ball on my bed with tears streaming down my face If I have to read this, so do you. This is funnier than it should be Omfg
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Bad, Batman, and Bitch: lastsonlost: siryouarebeingmocked: jlongbone: Batwoman: First Look | TRAILER REACTION @hello-kitty-senpai @formallyknownasjoesmother @nunyabizni @the-mighty-birdy @libertarirynn @robert-the-redhead-lover @omega-bellum @odinoco @thesocialjusticecourier @siryouarebeingmocked @cisnowflake @lastsonlost Turn down the volume or put on headphones, folks. Thaaat said, I bet her main character arc is going to be about being an edgy lesbian rebel. Kind of like Arrow, except Ollie’s always had to subvert the System, not flout it entirely. Like someone on Youtube said, the line should’ve been “when it fits me”. The Alfred-like character is Lucius Fox’s son, Luke. And in the comics, he’s Batwing II. In fact, he actively wanted to get recruited by Batman. If this version is anything like that, it would explain the Taser. “No guns, no killing!” But that version had MMA experience, and homeboy here certainly does not. Five bucks says Kate disarms him. Oh, and of course they think she’s Batman, because she stole his costume and doesn’t have the red wig yet! Duh! That’s not sexism, that’s branding! Incidentally, she started with short hair in the comics. The red wig is a decoy, so bad guys pull it, it comes off, and then she turns around and ruins their whole career. So it’s not actually the CW’s fault. Honestly, I gave up hope for any subtlety in this series when Kate conspicuously flirted with Kara less than five screentime minutes after she first appeared. “Did I mention I am a lesbian?” WHAT THE FUCK did they Luke Fox? The man is a brick shithouse made of Genius not a frightened little bitch with a stun gun. Wow that was… Something. I never dreamed it would be that bad. I would literally rather watch Captain Marvel.
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Ass, Community, and God: Everyone meet Frank. Frank is 40b snapping turtle that wandered into a community where he did not belong. Frank needed to be escorted back to his local pond where he couldnt go all snappity snap on anyone (or oute puppies) so my friend and I jumped into action. Within about 2 minutes it was prety apparent that Frank is a gigantic king a""hole Here we see Frank gettin all high and mighty trying to run the f"k away from us and get to the nearest basket of puppies that he could then chompity chomp simply because he is a giant t"k. Let me tell you something Frank, your dreams of being a Godzlla like terror on humanity are f"king over. You picked the wrong towrn Frank, you picked the wrong king town. Not äke Frank was gonna make it easy on me though. I swear to god this bastard just about hissed and shit everywhere betore we got him to calm the f'k down Jesus Frank Frank then realized he was ked so instead of cooperating and getting a free ride back to his pond OH NO. Frank here decides he is five f"king years old and he sits thef"K down and goes limp Honestly Frank grow the fk up. You think ather turtles are acting like this at your age Frank, no. Frank here probably thought at this point we we're unqualified to deal with a shelled prehistoric asswipe but his ass was wrong. So wrong WE F KING LASSO'D THE SH.T OUTTA YOU FRANK Needless to say Frank was pretty f"king upset about the whole ordeal and bitched the entre ten minute walk back to Casa De Frank and just when 1 thought my life was gonna got just a ittle bit easier, Frank goes and torpedo sholgun pisses all over my toot Fk you Frank. Thats low even for you, you pancake sheled dickweed Long story short we got Frank back home and saved the entire town. Frank was not hurt, and we treated the whole situation with care BECAUSE TM A BIGGER MORE MATURE PERSON THAN YOU FRANK YOU SON OF A B'TCH THE META PICTURE awesomesthesia: Meet Frank The Turtle
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Chun-Li, Tumblr, and Blog: despondentparamour: Mighty Captain Marvel #8, Marvel Vs Capcom variant cover by Shinkiro (2017) team chun li 

despondentparamour: Mighty Captain Marvel #8, Marvel Vs Capcom variant cover by Shinkiro (2017) team chun li 

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Ass, Community, and God: Everyone meet Frank. Frank is 40b snapping turtle that wandered into a community where he did not belong. Frank needed to be escorted back to his local pond where he couldnt go all snappity snap on anyone (or oute puppies) so my friend and I jumped into action. Within about 2 minutes it was prety apparent that Frank is a gigantic king a""hole Here we see Frank gettin all high and mighty trying to run the f"k away from us and get to the nearest basket of puppies that he could then chompity chomp simply because he is a giant t"k. Let me tell you something Frank, your dreams of being a Godzlla like terror on humanity are f"king over. You picked the wrong towrn Frank, you picked the wrong king town. Not äke Frank was gonna make it easy on me though. I swear to god this bastard just about hissed and shit everywhere betore we got him to calm the f'k down Jesus Frank Frank then realized he was ked so instead of cooperating and getting a free ride back to his pond OH NO. Frank here decides he is five f"king years old and he sits thef"K down and goes limp Honestly Frank grow the fk up. You think ather turtles are acting like this at your age Frank, no. Frank here probably thought at this point we we're unqualified to deal with a shelled prehistoric asswipe but his ass was wrong. So wrong WE F KING LASSO'D THE SH.T OUTTA YOU FRANK Needless to say Frank was pretty f"king upset about the whole ordeal and bitched the entre ten minute walk back to Casa De Frank and just when 1 thought my life was gonna got just a ittle bit easier, Frank goes and torpedo sholgun pisses all over my toot Fk you Frank. Thats low even for you, you pancake sheled dickweed Long story short we got Frank back home and saved the entire town. Frank was not hurt, and we treated the whole situation with care BECAUSE TM A BIGGER MORE MATURE PERSON THAN YOU FRANK YOU SON OF A B'TCH THE META PICTURE awesomesthesia: Meet Frank The Turtle
Save