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Asian, Confused, and Fucking: Dylan Reneau @DylanReneau Unpopular opinion: cookie dough is worth taking the risk of getting salmonella @logancooper14 Dylan pull yourself together and go get a damn spoon. It's cookie dough not a beefy 5 layer burrito have some class lostsometime: vorbits: smallest-feeblest-boggart: ego-ann-16: phantoms-lair: ankaa-avarshina: lorem64: ankaa-avarshina: lorem64: I’m so confused why he would think cookie dough would give him salmonella??? What parent told him this. There’s no chicken in there! Two words: Raw eggs. ?? What kind of world do you live in where Raw eggs carry salmonella or are in anyway unsafe Don’t ask me, ask them Americans. I’m an Asian just passing the word on *deep breath* Though the risk is small, raw eggs can carry samonella. MORE THREATENINGLY Raw wheat can carry E. Coli. However, if you don’t mind making your own cookie dough, you can easily make it safely. Take your standard recipe. Omit the eggs. Eggs serve as a binding agent to hold the cookie together. Since we’re eating the dough raw, that’s not needed. Take the flour, put it in a pan and bake it at 350 for 7 minutes. Any E. Coli is now dead. Just mix the rest of the ingredients together as the recipe is called for and BAM, perfectly safe edible cookie dough. Thank u so fucking much for this wisdom wait you’re telling my i can get E, Coli just FROM EATING FLOUR straight from the bag??? there go my dinner plans ;( why are you eating flour straight from the bag???
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Being Alone, Charlie, and Facebook: toddler facebook from MOMMYSHORTS.com Ava B My mom thinks I'm going down for a nap when we get home. Bwahahaha. She's hilarious. Like Comment 2 minutes ago 15 toddlers like this. 1 minute ago Like 3 Luke A FYI- I convinced my mom I don't need a nap. Now she lets me watch TV every afternoon because SHE needs a break! WIN 23 seconds ago Like 14 Write a comment... Kara G I pooped in the bath tub while taking a bath last night and my mom had to scoop it up with a cup and flush it down the toilet. LMAO! Like Comment 4 minutes ago 12 toddlers like this Lila G I hope it wasn't one of my sippy cups, sis! 3 minutes ago via mobile Like s 2 Write a comment... Owen G Forgot the teacher's name at Gymboree today so called her Mommy. What's the big deal? Isn't that every woman's name? Like Comment 10 minutes ago 21 toddlers like this. Gillian H It's the woman in my house's name. 9 minutes ago Like 5 Thomas L Mine too! 5 minutes ago Like. Write a comment... Lee P My cat really looks like it needs it's tail pulled. Repeatedly. Like Comment 18 minutes ago 34 toddlers like this. Martin D So, here's the thing. I totally know how to use the potty. But Mommy keeps giving me treats if I make it seem like a surprise when I go. Psht. Diapers for life, yo. Like Comment 30 minutes ago 47 toddlers like this. Hannah W I stopped using diapers at 15 months. 22 minutes ago Like Charlie G UNLIKE 15 minutes ago Like 32 Write a comment.. KortneyA I opened all of my mom's tampons today and watched them expand in the toilet. It was awesome. You should all try this at home. Like Comment 34 minutes ago 16 toddlers like this. Cassie S Why did mommy walk into the laundry room?! Oh no, I don't think she's ever coming back! I'm going to be in the living room alone Like Comment 45 minutes ago 1 toddler likes this. Thomas L UPDATE: She came back. Sorry for the false alarm. 44 minutes ago Write a comment... Shelley B It's fun to ask for "no bubbles" once my bubble bath is ready. Like Comment 48 minutes ago 33 toddlers like this. Lucas N Is it bedtime yet? Because that's the time I like to announce I'm ready to eat my dinner Like Comment 1 hour ago 10 toddlers like this. Mark T I'm about to pretend I need to poop on the potty so... YES. 50 minutes ago Like 1 Write a comment... Nikki S Watch, I'm gonna ask for a red popsicle and when mom gives it to me, I'm going to scream 'I SAID PURPLE' and have a fit. Like Comment 1 hour ago 44 toddlers like this. Ella B Ha. I tried that yesterday with the blue sippy cup instead of the green one. SO MUCH FUN!!!! 54 minutes ago Like 4 Daniel N LOL. Moms are so easy to piss off 24 minutes ago Like- 23 Write a comment... MOMMYSHORTS.com you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com srsfunny:If Toddlers Could Actually Post On Facebook

srsfunny:If Toddlers Could Actually Post On Facebook

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Today, Relatable, and You: My dinner >>> Yours - Comment what you ate for dinner today 🍽🍑

My dinner >>> Yours - Comment what you ate for dinner today 🍽🍑

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