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Never Ever Memes


    
                    

                

            
        
    

    
    
    






            

            
            

                

                    
                

                

                    
                    
                    

                        


	


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        Never ever: Never ever
        

            
            

                
                
                    Never ever: Never ever
                    
                
            

            
                
                
Never ever

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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        daisyannewinchester:

karadin:
heads up!
Never ever say yes before you identify who is on the other line. Some phrases you can use
Hello
This is xyz
I am here
How are you
Who is this
What’s up
How can I help you
What god do you serve
Who is your master
Speak now or forever hold your peace
What do you want
You have reached a life model decoy of [your name] please leave a message. And if its urgent, leave it urgently. Beep. Then hang up
What’s bracken bro, how you livin 
My names Chelsea, what’s your favorite dinner food
You have reached Mistress Elena’s Dungenous Deeds how may I be of pleasure to you today
To talk to a customer, please press one
I’m gay
Just start singing
Try to sell them something. That will throw them for a loop
Pretend the line is breaking up by making static sounds with your mouth
Speak
State your purpose
What you want, baby I got it. What you need? You know I’m askin
Error 404 phone set to self destruct in 5… 4… 3…
*Liam Neeson voice* Whoever you are, I will find you and I will kill you
Answer with a lewd moan
Answer crying
I have done all of these.
: daisyannewinchester:

karadin:
heads up!
Never ever say yes before you identify who is on the other line. Some phrases you can use
Hello
This is xyz
I am here
How are you
Who is this
What’s up
How can I help you
What god do you serve
Who is your master
Speak now or forever hold your peace
What do you want
You have reached a life model decoy of [your name] please leave a message. And if its urgent, leave it urgently. Beep. Then hang up
What’s bracken bro, how you livin 
My names Chelsea, what’s your favorite dinner food
You have reached Mistress Elena’s Dungenous Deeds how may I be of pleasure to you today
To talk to a customer, please press one
I’m gay
Just start singing
Try to sell them something. That will throw them for a loop
Pretend the line is breaking up by making static sounds with your mouth
Speak
State your purpose
What you want, baby I got it. What you need? You know I’m askin
Error 404 phone set to self destruct in 5… 4… 3…
*Liam Neeson voice* Whoever you are, I will find you and I will kill you
Answer with a lewd moan
Answer crying
I have done all of these.

        

            
            

                
                
                    daisyannewinchester:

karadin:
heads up!
Never ever say yes before you identify who is on the other line. Some phrases you can use
Hello
This is xyz
I am here
How are you
Who is this
What’s up
How can I help you
What god do you serve
Who is your master
Speak now or forever hold your peace
What do you want
You have reached a life model decoy of [your name] please leave a message. And if its urgent, leave it urgently. Beep. Then hang up
What’s bracken bro, how you livin 
My names Chelsea, what’s your favorite dinner food
You have reached Mistress Elena’s Dungenous Deeds how may I be of pleasure to you today
To talk to a customer, please press one
I’m gay
Just start singing
Try to sell them something. That will throw them for a loop
Pretend the line is breaking up by making static sounds with your mouth
Speak
State your purpose
What you want, baby I got it. What you need? You know I’m askin
Error 404 phone set to self destruct in 5… 4… 3…
*Liam Neeson voice* Whoever you are, I will find you and I will kill you
Answer with a lewd moan
Answer crying
I have done all of these.
: daisyannewinchester:

karadin:
heads up!
Never ever say yes before you identify who is on the other line. Some phrases you can use
Hello
This is xyz
I am here
How are you
Who is this
What’s up
How can I help you
What god do you serve
Who is your master
Speak now or forever hold your peace
What do you want
You have reached a life model decoy of [your name] please leave a message. And if its urgent, leave it urgently. Beep. Then hang up
What’s bracken bro, how you livin 
My names Chelsea, what’s your favorite dinner food
You have reached Mistress Elena’s Dungenous Deeds how may I be of pleasure to you today
To talk to a customer, please press one
I’m gay
Just start singing
Try to sell them something. That will throw them for a loop
Pretend the line is breaking up by making static sounds with your mouth
Speak
State your purpose
What you want, baby I got it. What you need? You know I’m askin
Error 404 phone set to self destruct in 5… 4… 3…
*Liam Neeson voice* Whoever you are, I will find you and I will kill you
Answer with a lewd moan
Answer crying
I have done all of these.

                    
                
            

            
                
                
daisyannewinchester:

karadin:
heads up!
Never ever say yes before you identify who is on the other line. Some phrases you can use
Hello...

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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        Can I pay for the person behind me?: 2:23 PM
 87
 00
 00:54
 Share
 986
 31
 LeaderOfTheBeavers • 2h
 One time I was working the drive thru around
 christmas time. I was handling the money and handing
 out the food. This position sucks in the winter because
 it's so damn cold and your hands are basically falling
 off grabbing cold drinks and ice cream and reaching
 outside to hand them to people. So I wasn't having the
 best day.
 So this young guy pulls up, and had like a soda and
 some fries, like a 5 dollar order. He asks if he can
 pay for the car behind him, and I tell him it's like $28,
 but he pays for it anyway! So I already get the warm
 fuzzies :)
 Then I get to be the person to tell the recipient "The
 person in front of you paid for your food!" And seeing
 their face light up had absolutely made my day but
 then! She said "Can I pay for the person behind me?"
 I swear to god, I'm 100% honest, there was a chain
 of 8 people that kept paying for the person behind
 them! I got to watch each and every one of their faces
 light up! It was one of the best days I've ever had at
 my job. I couldn't stop telling my coworkers what was
 happening and I was just so excited!
 So now, whenever I go to the drive thru I ask if I can
 pay for the person behind me, and really really hope
 that it happens again, so that it makes everyone's day :)
 Guys, I'm telling you, being that cashier that super cold
 day and having that happen, it made my week, inspired
 me to do the same, and restored my faith in humanity
 forever. I will never ever forget it.
 Add a comment
 >>
Can I pay for the person behind me?
        

            
            

                
                
                    Can I pay for the person behind me?: 2:23 PM
 87
 00
 00:54
 Share
 986
 31
 LeaderOfTheBeavers • 2h
 One time I was working the drive thru around
 christmas time. I was handling the money and handing
 out the food. This position sucks in the winter because
 it's so damn cold and your hands are basically falling
 off grabbing cold drinks and ice cream and reaching
 outside to hand them to people. So I wasn't having the
 best day.
 So this young guy pulls up, and had like a soda and
 some fries, like a 5 dollar order. He asks if he can
 pay for the car behind him, and I tell him it's like $28,
 but he pays for it anyway! So I already get the warm
 fuzzies :)
 Then I get to be the person to tell the recipient "The
 person in front of you paid for your food!" And seeing
 their face light up had absolutely made my day but
 then! She said "Can I pay for the person behind me?"
 I swear to god, I'm 100% honest, there was a chain
 of 8 people that kept paying for the person behind
 them! I got to watch each and every one of their faces
 light up! It was one of the best days I've ever had at
 my job. I couldn't stop telling my coworkers what was
 happening and I was just so excited!
 So now, whenever I go to the drive thru I ask if I can
 pay for the person behind me, and really really hope
 that it happens again, so that it makes everyone's day :)
 Guys, I'm telling you, being that cashier that super cold
 day and having that happen, it made my week, inspired
 me to do the same, and restored my faith in humanity
 forever. I will never ever forget it.
 Add a comment
 >>
Can I pay for the person behind me?
                    
                
            

            
                
                
Can I pay for the person behind me?

                
            
            
        

    

    

        
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        gaylibertariansc:
queer-anna:

matriarchyforeveryone:


michaelam1978:
I love this! Judge Judy schools a naïve

 and obviously disappointed mom who thinks dad doesn’t have any right to their child.
The mother carried that girl nine months in her stomach and then pushed her out of her body. No, the father does NOT have even remotely the same rights to the child as the mother!


My mother carried me for nine months in her stomach and then pushed me out of her body. 
My mother also got drunk and refused to feed me or my three siblings and forced my oldest brother to cook for us while she was passed-out drunk on the couch. 
My father has fought for us for as long as I can remember, while my mother was busy getting drinking straight-vodka and brainwashing us to think my father was the evil one. 
I nearly starved at age 6 because my mother was too drunk to cook half of the time. I had to dress my 4 year old sister for school, at age six. I had to walk in heavy snow at age 6 with my 4 year old sister to a bus stop to ride to school. 
My father has fought a long, long time to get custody of us. He deeply loves us. My mother has never, ever done anything like that. She has never nursed me when I had the flu, or kissed me goodnight, or told me she loved me. She has never taught me how to tie my shoes, or how to brush my hair, or how to take care of myself. 
Yes, my mother carried me, and three other kids, to term and successfully gave birth, but only has my father put 100% of his life into something that should require two people to do. 


Still a good one
: You're the mother, he's
 That's not what l've
 been told but...
 the father. He has as
 much right to take that
 child as you do.
 ns

 Well, if you've gotten
 different advice, you
 Okay.
 were mistaken.

 ..including judges and
 probation officers, who
 still don't get that
 message...
 In this country, fathers
 are not second-class
 citizens. I know there
 are a lot of people out
 there...

 ...but fathers are not
 Not always. Sometimes
 second-class citizens.
 it's 50-50 but it's a
 Sometimes they're
 actually better parents.
 case-by-case basis.

 But anybody that says.it's not yours. It's both
 to me 'he can't take my of yours. You made her
 daughter with him...
 together.
gaylibertariansc:
queer-anna:

matriarchyforeveryone:


michaelam1978:
I love this! Judge Judy schools a naïve

 and obviously disappointed mom who thinks dad doesn’t have any right to their child.
The mother carried that girl nine months in her stomach and then pushed her out of her body. No, the father does NOT have even remotely the same rights to the child as the mother!


My mother carried me for nine months in her stomach and then pushed me out of her body. 
My mother also got drunk and refused to feed me or my three siblings and forced my oldest brother to cook for us while she was passed-out drunk on the couch. 
My father has fought for us for as long as I can remember, while my mother was busy getting drinking straight-vodka and brainwashing us to think my father was the evil one. 
I nearly starved at age 6 because my mother was too drunk to cook half of the time. I had to dress my 4 year old sister for school, at age six. I had to walk in heavy snow at age 6 with my 4 year old sister to a bus stop to ride to school. 
My father has fought a long, long time to get custody of us. He deeply loves us. My mother has never, ever done anything like that. She has never nursed me when I had the flu, or kissed me goodnight, or told me she loved me. She has never taught me how to tie my shoes, or how to brush my hair, or how to take care of myself. 
Yes, my mother carried me, and three other kids, to term and successfully gave birth, but only has my father put 100% of his life into something that should require two people to do. 


Still a good one

        

            
            

                
                
                    gaylibertariansc:
queer-anna:

matriarchyforeveryone:


michaelam1978:
I love this! Judge Judy schools a naïve

 and obviously disappointed mom who thinks dad doesn’t have any right to their child.
The mother carried that girl nine months in her stomach and then pushed her out of her body. No, the father does NOT have even remotely the same rights to the child as the mother!


My mother carried me for nine months in her stomach and then pushed me out of her body. 
My mother also got drunk and refused to feed me or my three siblings and forced my oldest brother to cook for us while she was passed-out drunk on the couch. 
My father has fought for us for as long as I can remember, while my mother was busy getting drinking straight-vodka and brainwashing us to think my father was the evil one. 
I nearly starved at age 6 because my mother was too drunk to cook half of the time. I had to dress my 4 year old sister for school, at age six. I had to walk in heavy snow at age 6 with my 4 year old sister to a bus stop to ride to school. 
My father has fought a long, long time to get custody of us. He deeply loves us. My mother has never, ever done anything like that. She has never nursed me when I had the flu, or kissed me goodnight, or told me she loved me. She has never taught me how to tie my shoes, or how to brush my hair, or how to take care of myself. 
Yes, my mother carried me, and three other kids, to term and successfully gave birth, but only has my father put 100% of his life into something that should require two people to do. 


Still a good one
: You're the mother, he's
 That's not what l've
 been told but...
 the father. He has as
 much right to take that
 child as you do.
 ns

 Well, if you've gotten
 different advice, you
 Okay.
 were mistaken.

 ..including judges and
 probation officers, who
 still don't get that
 message...
 In this country, fathers
 are not second-class
 citizens. I know there
 are a lot of people out
 there...

 ...but fathers are not
 Not always. Sometimes
 second-class citizens.
 it's 50-50 but it's a
 Sometimes they're
 actually better parents.
 case-by-case basis.

 But anybody that says.it's not yours. It's both
 to me 'he can't take my of yours. You made her
 daughter with him...
 together.
gaylibertariansc:
queer-anna:

matriarchyforeveryone:


michaelam1978:
I love this! Judge Judy schools a naïve

 and obviously disappointed mom who thinks dad doesn’t have any right to their child.
The mother carried that girl nine months in her stomach and then pushed her out of her body. No, the father does NOT have even remotely the same rights to the child as the mother!


My mother carried me for nine months in her stomach and then pushed me out of her body. 
My mother also got drunk and refused to feed me or my three siblings and forced my oldest brother to cook for us while she was passed-out drunk on the couch. 
My father has fought for us for as long as I can remember, while my mother was busy getting drinking straight-vodka and brainwashing us to think my father was the evil one. 
I nearly starved at age 6 because my mother was too drunk to cook half of the time. I had to dress my 4 year old sister for school, at age six. I had to walk in heavy snow at age 6 with my 4 year old sister to a bus stop to ride to school. 
My father has fought a long, long time to get custody of us. He deeply loves us. My mother has never, ever done anything like that. She has never nursed me when I had the flu, or kissed me goodnight, or told me she loved me. She has never taught me how to tie my shoes, or how to brush my hair, or how to take care of myself. 
Yes, my mother carried me, and three other kids, to term and successfully gave birth, but only has my father put 100% of his life into something that should require two people to do. 


Still a good one

                    
                
            

            
            
        

    

    

        
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        butchmachine:

kabesattic:

oldfilmsflicker:

animatedamerican:

viewtiful-kim:
Hamlet adaptation where Hamlet is a vlogger and all his soliloquies are breakdowns he uploads to YouTube
… I am unironically here for this

this is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen in my life

This is - legitimately - my favourite delivery of Shakespeare I have EVER seen (and I have seen some good-ass productions yo, in the Globe Theatre itself even). Like seriously, even though the words are unchanged, he’s stripped away ALL of the archaic pretense and assumed grandeur of ~presenting the bard~ that makes even the most wildly talented of actors and innovative of productions inherently inaccessible to a modern audience. Like, they’re still great, they can still communicate the message and (some) of the nuance, but they’re still always a step removed from being identifiable to any viewer’s lived experience. They’re still always reciting 15th century poetry. But this guy? This guy is like, screw iambic pentameter, to hell with being precious about the material, HOW WOULD AN ACTUAL PERSON SAY THIS SHIT?
Like this. And it’s beautiful. It’s beautiful to hear a soliloquy I loved so much already, and have it come to life in a way it never, ever, did before. I feel like I grasp his motivations, his twists and turns, no longer on an academic level but on a visceral, instinctive one. Because he’s presenting his mental and emotional journey in a way that speaks honestly, like a real person.
So yeah, this shit post? I love it. Deeply and sincerely.


Here’s the link, yall
https://youtu.be/CEGn_xrdg6U
Gary Cook has more videos and only 1k subscribers. Give him some love!
: butchmachine:

kabesattic:

oldfilmsflicker:

animatedamerican:

viewtiful-kim:
Hamlet adaptation where Hamlet is a vlogger and all his soliloquies are breakdowns he uploads to YouTube
… I am unironically here for this

this is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen in my life

This is - legitimately - my favourite delivery of Shakespeare I have EVER seen (and I have seen some good-ass productions yo, in the Globe Theatre itself even). Like seriously, even though the words are unchanged, he’s stripped away ALL of the archaic pretense and assumed grandeur of ~presenting the bard~ that makes even the most wildly talented of actors and innovative of productions inherently inaccessible to a modern audience. Like, they’re still great, they can still communicate the message and (some) of the nuance, but they’re still always a step removed from being identifiable to any viewer’s lived experience. They’re still always reciting 15th century poetry. But this guy? This guy is like, screw iambic pentameter, to hell with being precious about the material, HOW WOULD AN ACTUAL PERSON SAY THIS SHIT?
Like this. And it’s beautiful. It’s beautiful to hear a soliloquy I loved so much already, and have it come to life in a way it never, ever, did before. I feel like I grasp his motivations, his twists and turns, no longer on an academic level but on a visceral, instinctive one. Because he’s presenting his mental and emotional journey in a way that speaks honestly, like a real person.
So yeah, this shit post? I love it. Deeply and sincerely.


Here’s the link, yall
https://youtu.be/CEGn_xrdg6U
Gary Cook has more videos and only 1k subscribers. Give him some love!

        

            
            

                
                
                    butchmachine:

kabesattic:

oldfilmsflicker:

animatedamerican:

viewtiful-kim:
Hamlet adaptation where Hamlet is a vlogger and all his soliloquies are breakdowns he uploads to YouTube
… I am unironically here for this

this is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen in my life

This is - legitimately - my favourite delivery of Shakespeare I have EVER seen (and I have seen some good-ass productions yo, in the Globe Theatre itself even). Like seriously, even though the words are unchanged, he’s stripped away ALL of the archaic pretense and assumed grandeur of ~presenting the bard~ that makes even the most wildly talented of actors and innovative of productions inherently inaccessible to a modern audience. Like, they’re still great, they can still communicate the message and (some) of the nuance, but they’re still always a step removed from being identifiable to any viewer’s lived experience. They’re still always reciting 15th century poetry. But this guy? This guy is like, screw iambic pentameter, to hell with being precious about the material, HOW WOULD AN ACTUAL PERSON SAY THIS SHIT?
Like this. And it’s beautiful. It’s beautiful to hear a soliloquy I loved so much already, and have it come to life in a way it never, ever, did before. I feel like I grasp his motivations, his twists and turns, no longer on an academic level but on a visceral, instinctive one. Because he’s presenting his mental and emotional journey in a way that speaks honestly, like a real person.
So yeah, this shit post? I love it. Deeply and sincerely.


Here’s the link, yall
https://youtu.be/CEGn_xrdg6U
Gary Cook has more videos and only 1k subscribers. Give him some love!
: butchmachine:

kabesattic:

oldfilmsflicker:

animatedamerican:

viewtiful-kim:
Hamlet adaptation where Hamlet is a vlogger and all his soliloquies are breakdowns he uploads to YouTube
… I am unironically here for this

this is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen in my life

This is - legitimately - my favourite delivery of Shakespeare I have EVER seen (and I have seen some good-ass productions yo, in the Globe Theatre itself even). Like seriously, even though the words are unchanged, he’s stripped away ALL of the archaic pretense and assumed grandeur of ~presenting the bard~ that makes even the most wildly talented of actors and innovative of productions inherently inaccessible to a modern audience. Like, they’re still great, they can still communicate the message and (some) of the nuance, but they’re still always a step removed from being identifiable to any viewer’s lived experience. They’re still always reciting 15th century poetry. But this guy? This guy is like, screw iambic pentameter, to hell with being precious about the material, HOW WOULD AN ACTUAL PERSON SAY THIS SHIT?
Like this. And it’s beautiful. It’s beautiful to hear a soliloquy I loved so much already, and have it come to life in a way it never, ever, did before. I feel like I grasp his motivations, his twists and turns, no longer on an academic level but on a visceral, instinctive one. Because he’s presenting his mental and emotional journey in a way that speaks honestly, like a real person.
So yeah, this shit post? I love it. Deeply and sincerely.


Here’s the link, yall
https://youtu.be/CEGn_xrdg6U
Gary Cook has more videos and only 1k subscribers. Give him some love!

                    
                    

                    
                
            

            
            
        

    

    

        
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        theladyzephyr:

Folks let me talk about Crowley and sunglasses, because I have a lot of emotions about when he wears them and when he doesn’t, and Hiding versus Being Seen.
We’re introduced to the concept of Crowley wearing glasses even before we’re introduced to Crowley, by Hastur: “If you ask me he’s been up here too long. Gone native. Enjoying himself too much. Wearing sunglasses even when he doesn’t need them.”
Honestly Crowley’s whole introduction is a fantastic; we learn so much about his character in a tiny amount of time. The fact that he’s late, the Queen playing as the Bentley approaches, the “Hi, guys” in response to Hastur and Ligur’s “Hail Satan”. I like this intro much better than the one originally scripted with the rats at the phone company, but I digress.
Crowley wears sunglasses when he doesn’t need them. Specifically, he still wears them around the demons, and when he’s in hell.
You know where Crowley doesn’t wear glasses? At home.
We never once see him wearing glasses in his flat, except for when he knows Hastur and Ligur are coming. That’s an emotional kick to the gut for me. Here’s one of the only places Crowley’s comfortable enough to be sans glasses, and when he knows it’s going to be invaded he prepares not just physically with the holy water, but by putting up that emotional barrier in a place where he wasn’t supposed to need it.
An argument could be made that Crowley actually never needs glasses. We’re shown that it’s well within the angels’ and demons’ powers to pass unnoticed by humans. Crowley and Aziraphale waltz out of the manor in the middle of a police raid, and going unnoticed by the police takes so little effort that they can keep up a conversation while they stroll through. Even an unimaginative demon like Hastur apparently doesn’t have trouble with the humans losing it over his demonic eyes. The humans in the scene at Megiddo are acting like “this guy is a little weird” and not “holy shit his entire eyeballs are black jelly”
That means that Crowley’s glasses are a choice, just like Aziraphale’s softness. Sure, he could arrange matters so that nobody ever noticed his eyes, but he doesn’t want to. Crowley wants acceptance, and he wants to belong, and he’s never, ever had that. He didn’t fit in before the Fall in Heaven, he doesn’t fit in with the demons in Hell. With the glasses, and with the Bentley and his plants and with the barely-bad-enough-to-be-evil nuisance temptations, he’s choosing Earth. This is where he wants to fit in, perhaps not with the humans, but amongst them.
Even after Crowley is at his absolute lowest, when he thinks Aziraphale’s dead and he’s on his way to drink until the world ends, he takes the time to put a new pair on when the old ones are damaged. He needs that emotional crutch right now, even with everything about to turn into a pile of puddling goo he’s not ready for the world to see his eyes.
Which is why I swore out loud when Hastur forcibly takes them off.
It’s about the worst thing that Hastur could have done. Rather than leading with a physical threat, his first act is to strip away Crowley’s emotional defences. It’s a great writing choice because god it made me hate Hastur, even more than all the physical violence we see him do.
It’s also the moment that Crowley really truly gets his shit together, and focuses all of his considerable imagination on getting to Tadfield and Aziraphale to help save the world. He’s wielding the terrifyingly unimaginable power of someone who’s hit rock bottom and realised it literally could not get any worse than this. He doesn’t put another pair of glasses on after discorporating Hastur, and he spends the majority of the airbase sequence without them.
He puts them back on again, I think, at the moment that he really lets himself hope. When he thinks ‘shit, there may be a real chance that we get through this to a future that I don’t want to lose’.
The vulnerability is back, and he needs Adam to trust him. In Crowley’s mind being accepted by a human means he needs to have his eyes hidden. Someone give the demon a hug, please.
Interestingly, there’s only one time in the whole series that we see Crowley willingly choose to take his glasses off around another person. Only one person he’ll take down that barrier for, and even then he’s drunk before he does it.
Dear God/Satan/Someone that makes my heart ache. Crowley’s chosen Earth, but he’s also chosen Aziraphale. He’s been looking for somewhere to belong his entire existence, and it’s with the angel that he finally feels it.
When the dust settles and the world is saved and they finally have space to be themselves unguarded, I like to imagine Crowley takes off the glasses when it’s just the two of them; the idea of being known doesn’t scare him quite so much anymore.  
: theladyzephyr:

Folks let me talk about Crowley and sunglasses, because I have a lot of emotions about when he wears them and when he doesn’t, and Hiding versus Being Seen.
We’re introduced to the concept of Crowley wearing glasses even before we’re introduced to Crowley, by Hastur: “If you ask me he’s been up here too long. Gone native. Enjoying himself too much. Wearing sunglasses even when he doesn’t need them.”
Honestly Crowley’s whole introduction is a fantastic; we learn so much about his character in a tiny amount of time. The fact that he’s late, the Queen playing as the Bentley approaches, the “Hi, guys” in response to Hastur and Ligur’s “Hail Satan”. I like this intro much better than the one originally scripted with the rats at the phone company, but I digress.
Crowley wears sunglasses when he doesn’t need them. Specifically, he still wears them around the demons, and when he’s in hell.
You know where Crowley doesn’t wear glasses? At home.
We never once see him wearing glasses in his flat, except for when he knows Hastur and Ligur are coming. That’s an emotional kick to the gut for me. Here’s one of the only places Crowley’s comfortable enough to be sans glasses, and when he knows it’s going to be invaded he prepares not just physically with the holy water, but by putting up that emotional barrier in a place where he wasn’t supposed to need it.
An argument could be made that Crowley actually never needs glasses. We’re shown that it’s well within the angels’ and demons’ powers to pass unnoticed by humans. Crowley and Aziraphale waltz out of the manor in the middle of a police raid, and going unnoticed by the police takes so little effort that they can keep up a conversation while they stroll through. Even an unimaginative demon like Hastur apparently doesn’t have trouble with the humans losing it over his demonic eyes. The humans in the scene at Megiddo are acting like “this guy is a little weird” and not “holy shit his entire eyeballs are black jelly”
That means that Crowley’s glasses are a choice, just like Aziraphale’s softness. Sure, he could arrange matters so that nobody ever noticed his eyes, but he doesn’t want to. Crowley wants acceptance, and he wants to belong, and he’s never, ever had that. He didn’t fit in before the Fall in Heaven, he doesn’t fit in with the demons in Hell. With the glasses, and with the Bentley and his plants and with the barely-bad-enough-to-be-evil nuisance temptations, he’s choosing Earth. This is where he wants to fit in, perhaps not with the humans, but amongst them.
Even after Crowley is at his absolute lowest, when he thinks Aziraphale’s dead and he’s on his way to drink until the world ends, he takes the time to put a new pair on when the old ones are damaged. He needs that emotional crutch right now, even with everything about to turn into a pile of puddling goo he’s not ready for the world to see his eyes.
Which is why I swore out loud when Hastur forcibly takes them off.
It’s about the worst thing that Hastur could have done. Rather than leading with a physical threat, his first act is to strip away Crowley’s emotional defences. It’s a great writing choice because god it made me hate Hastur, even more than all the physical violence we see him do.
It’s also the moment that Crowley really truly gets his shit together, and focuses all of his considerable imagination on getting to Tadfield and Aziraphale to help save the world. He’s wielding the terrifyingly unimaginable power of someone who’s hit rock bottom and realised it literally could not get any worse than this. He doesn’t put another pair of glasses on after discorporating Hastur, and he spends the majority of the airbase sequence without them.
He puts them back on again, I think, at the moment that he really lets himself hope. When he thinks ‘shit, there may be a real chance that we get through this to a future that I don’t want to lose’.
The vulnerability is back, and he needs Adam to trust him. In Crowley’s mind being accepted by a human means he needs to have his eyes hidden. Someone give the demon a hug, please.
Interestingly, there’s only one time in the whole series that we see Crowley willingly choose to take his glasses off around another person. Only one person he’ll take down that barrier for, and even then he’s drunk before he does it.
Dear God/Satan/Someone that makes my heart ache. Crowley’s chosen Earth, but he’s also chosen Aziraphale. He’s been looking for somewhere to belong his entire existence, and it’s with the angel that he finally feels it.
When the dust settles and the world is saved and they finally have space to be themselves unguarded, I like to imagine Crowley takes off the glasses when it’s just the two of them; the idea of being known doesn’t scare him quite so much anymore.  

        

            
            

                
                
                    theladyzephyr:

Folks let me talk about Crowley and sunglasses, because I have a lot of emotions about when he wears them and when he doesn’t, and Hiding versus Being Seen.
We’re introduced to the concept of Crowley wearing glasses even before we’re introduced to Crowley, by Hastur: “If you ask me he’s been up here too long. Gone native. Enjoying himself too much. Wearing sunglasses even when he doesn’t need them.”
Honestly Crowley’s whole introduction is a fantastic; we learn so much about his character in a tiny amount of time. The fact that he’s late, the Queen playing as the Bentley approaches, the “Hi, guys” in response to Hastur and Ligur’s “Hail Satan”. I like this intro much better than the one originally scripted with the rats at the phone company, but I digress.
Crowley wears sunglasses when he doesn’t need them. Specifically, he still wears them around the demons, and when he’s in hell.
You know where Crowley doesn’t wear glasses? At home.
We never once see him wearing glasses in his flat, except for when he knows Hastur and Ligur are coming. That’s an emotional kick to the gut for me. Here’s one of the only places Crowley’s comfortable enough to be sans glasses, and when he knows it’s going to be invaded he prepares not just physically with the holy water, but by putting up that emotional barrier in a place where he wasn’t supposed to need it.
An argument could be made that Crowley actually never needs glasses. We’re shown that it’s well within the angels’ and demons’ powers to pass unnoticed by humans. Crowley and Aziraphale waltz out of the manor in the middle of a police raid, and going unnoticed by the police takes so little effort that they can keep up a conversation while they stroll through. Even an unimaginative demon like Hastur apparently doesn’t have trouble with the humans losing it over his demonic eyes. The humans in the scene at Megiddo are acting like “this guy is a little weird” and not “holy shit his entire eyeballs are black jelly”
That means that Crowley’s glasses are a choice, just like Aziraphale’s softness. Sure, he could arrange matters so that nobody ever noticed his eyes, but he doesn’t want to. Crowley wants acceptance, and he wants to belong, and he’s never, ever had that. He didn’t fit in before the Fall in Heaven, he doesn’t fit in with the demons in Hell. With the glasses, and with the Bentley and his plants and with the barely-bad-enough-to-be-evil nuisance temptations, he’s choosing Earth. This is where he wants to fit in, perhaps not with the humans, but amongst them.
Even after Crowley is at his absolute lowest, when he thinks Aziraphale’s dead and he’s on his way to drink until the world ends, he takes the time to put a new pair on when the old ones are damaged. He needs that emotional crutch right now, even with everything about to turn into a pile of puddling goo he’s not ready for the world to see his eyes.
Which is why I swore out loud when Hastur forcibly takes them off.
It’s about the worst thing that Hastur could have done. Rather than leading with a physical threat, his first act is to strip away Crowley’s emotional defences. It’s a great writing choice because god it made me hate Hastur, even more than all the physical violence we see him do.
It’s also the moment that Crowley really truly gets his shit together, and focuses all of his considerable imagination on getting to Tadfield and Aziraphale to help save the world. He’s wielding the terrifyingly unimaginable power of someone who’s hit rock bottom and realised it literally could not get any worse than this. He doesn’t put another pair of glasses on after discorporating Hastur, and he spends the majority of the airbase sequence without them.
He puts them back on again, I think, at the moment that he really lets himself hope. When he thinks ‘shit, there may be a real chance that we get through this to a future that I don’t want to lose’.
The vulnerability is back, and he needs Adam to trust him. In Crowley’s mind being accepted by a human means he needs to have his eyes hidden. Someone give the demon a hug, please.
Interestingly, there’s only one time in the whole series that we see Crowley willingly choose to take his glasses off around another person. Only one person he’ll take down that barrier for, and even then he’s drunk before he does it.
Dear God/Satan/Someone that makes my heart ache. Crowley’s chosen Earth, but he’s also chosen Aziraphale. He’s been looking for somewhere to belong his entire existence, and it’s with the angel that he finally feels it.
When the dust settles and the world is saved and they finally have space to be themselves unguarded, I like to imagine Crowley takes off the glasses when it’s just the two of them; the idea of being known doesn’t scare him quite so much anymore.  
: theladyzephyr:

Folks let me talk about Crowley and sunglasses, because I have a lot of emotions about when he wears them and when he doesn’t, and Hiding versus Being Seen.
We’re introduced to the concept of Crowley wearing glasses even before we’re introduced to Crowley, by Hastur: “If you ask me he’s been up here too long. Gone native. Enjoying himself too much. Wearing sunglasses even when he doesn’t need them.”
Honestly Crowley’s whole introduction is a fantastic; we learn so much about his character in a tiny amount of time. The fact that he’s late, the Queen playing as the Bentley approaches, the “Hi, guys” in response to Hastur and Ligur’s “Hail Satan”. I like this intro much better than the one originally scripted with the rats at the phone company, but I digress.
Crowley wears sunglasses when he doesn’t need them. Specifically, he still wears them around the demons, and when he’s in hell.
You know where Crowley doesn’t wear glasses? At home.
We never once see him wearing glasses in his flat, except for when he knows Hastur and Ligur are coming. That’s an emotional kick to the gut for me. Here’s one of the only places Crowley’s comfortable enough to be sans glasses, and when he knows it’s going to be invaded he prepares not just physically with the holy water, but by putting up that emotional barrier in a place where he wasn’t supposed to need it.
An argument could be made that Crowley actually never needs glasses. We’re shown that it’s well within the angels’ and demons’ powers to pass unnoticed by humans. Crowley and Aziraphale waltz out of the manor in the middle of a police raid, and going unnoticed by the police takes so little effort that they can keep up a conversation while they stroll through. Even an unimaginative demon like Hastur apparently doesn’t have trouble with the humans losing it over his demonic eyes. The humans in the scene at Megiddo are acting like “this guy is a little weird” and not “holy shit his entire eyeballs are black jelly”
That means that Crowley’s glasses are a choice, just like Aziraphale’s softness. Sure, he could arrange matters so that nobody ever noticed his eyes, but he doesn’t want to. Crowley wants acceptance, and he wants to belong, and he’s never, ever had that. He didn’t fit in before the Fall in Heaven, he doesn’t fit in with the demons in Hell. With the glasses, and with the Bentley and his plants and with the barely-bad-enough-to-be-evil nuisance temptations, he’s choosing Earth. This is where he wants to fit in, perhaps not with the humans, but amongst them.
Even after Crowley is at his absolute lowest, when he thinks Aziraphale’s dead and he’s on his way to drink until the world ends, he takes the time to put a new pair on when the old ones are damaged. He needs that emotional crutch right now, even with everything about to turn into a pile of puddling goo he’s not ready for the world to see his eyes.
Which is why I swore out loud when Hastur forcibly takes them off.
It’s about the worst thing that Hastur could have done. Rather than leading with a physical threat, his first act is to strip away Crowley’s emotional defences. It’s a great writing choice because god it made me hate Hastur, even more than all the physical violence we see him do.
It’s also the moment that Crowley really truly gets his shit together, and focuses all of his considerable imagination on getting to Tadfield and Aziraphale to help save the world. He’s wielding the terrifyingly unimaginable power of someone who’s hit rock bottom and realised it literally could not get any worse than this. He doesn’t put another pair of glasses on after discorporating Hastur, and he spends the majority of the airbase sequence without them.
He puts them back on again, I think, at the moment that he really lets himself hope. When he thinks ‘shit, there may be a real chance that we get through this to a future that I don’t want to lose’.
The vulnerability is back, and he needs Adam to trust him. In Crowley’s mind being accepted by a human means he needs to have his eyes hidden. Someone give the demon a hug, please.
Interestingly, there’s only one time in the whole series that we see Crowley willingly choose to take his glasses off around another person. Only one person he’ll take down that barrier for, and even then he’s drunk before he does it.
Dear God/Satan/Someone that makes my heart ache. Crowley’s chosen Earth, but he’s also chosen Aziraphale. He’s been looking for somewhere to belong his entire existence, and it’s with the angel that he finally feels it.
When the dust settles and the world is saved and they finally have space to be themselves unguarded, I like to imagine Crowley takes off the glasses when it’s just the two of them; the idea of being known doesn’t scare him quite so much anymore.  

                    
                    

                    
                
            

            
            
        

    

    

        
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