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rubitrightintomyeyes: theonion: Rock Apparently Factors Into Girlfriend’s Shower Routine SEATTLE—Saying he was confused about the full extent of its purpose as well as its overall benefit, local man Jacob Ferris, 25, nonetheless surmised today that the oblong rock located in girlfriend Sarah Milstein’s shower caddy must somehow factor into her bathing routine, sources confirmed. “I guess at some point while she’s showering, she rubs a rock on her body,” said Ferris, expressing what he claimed was “the only possible conclusion” about the light-gray rock in his girlfriend’s bathroom. “I mean, it looks sort of nice, so she could just have it there for decoration or something. But it’s usually right near all the other soaps and her loofah, so I think it’s probably something she actually uses while under the water.” “I really don’t know how it all works,” Ferris added. “All I know is that in between Sarah getting into the shower and getting out, there’s a rock involved.” Ferris, who said he was unable to determine exactly when in the showering process the rock first comes into play, told reporters he is equally clueless about what part of the body the rock is used on. In addition, Ferris said he occasionally inspects the roughly 3-ounce object when he’s in Milstein’s shower, and told reporters that the rock is nearly always wet and is occasionally moved to slightly different spots within the bathtub, leading him to believe that his girlfriend uses it fairly regularly. He also noted his girlfriend’s bathing time never seems particularly longer than the average person’s considering she has added a rock into the mix. Ferris added that all attempts to incorporate the rock into his own shower routine have ultimately been unsuccessful. “I tried rubbing it on my skin once, and it hurt,” Ferris said, concluding that pouring soap and water directly onto the rock neither made it softer nor easier on his skin. “I could maybe see how it could get some dirt off of your body, but it seems too painful to work. Her skin usually looks nice though, so maybe I’m wrong.” “There is a chance it could be a hair thing,” Ferris continued. “Maybe she rubs the rock in her hair? I don’t know.” Ferris confirmed he has considered numerous reasons for why his girlfriend uses the rock in the shower, including that she has some type of skin condition, that the rock is some sort of weird tradition her family has, or that everyone uses rocks in the shower and he has been out of the loop the entire time. “It could be for cleaning the bathtub,” said Ferris, adding he once suspected the rock was a device for making the bathroom smell nice, but then noticed it had no discernible smell whatsoever. “Like every few weekends she scrubs the tub with this rock? I guess I could see Sarah doing that.” While Ferris said he is mostly certain that the rock was initially purchased at a home goods store of some kind, he was not able to completely rule out the possibility it was just a rock that his girlfriend found on the ground and decided to put in her shower. “I wonder if I should put a rock in my shower for when she’s over here,” said Ferris, who said he once tried to locate a rock at a Bed Bath & Beyond, but left after not wanting to walk up to a sales clerk and ask them where they kept their “shower rocks.” “Or I could just tell her to leave a rock at my place if she wants.” “I’m probably not going to do that,” Ferris added. At press time, a visibly perplexed Ferris had seen the rock sitting in Milstein’s trashcan and then looked in the shower to see another rock sitting in its place. : rubitrightintomyeyes: theonion: Rock Apparently Factors Into Girlfriend’s Shower Routine SEATTLE—Saying he was confused about the full extent of its purpose as well as its overall benefit, local man Jacob Ferris, 25, nonetheless surmised today that the oblong rock located in girlfriend Sarah Milstein’s shower caddy must somehow factor into her bathing routine, sources confirmed. “I guess at some point while she’s showering, she rubs a rock on her body,” said Ferris, expressing what he claimed was “the only possible conclusion” about the light-gray rock in his girlfriend’s bathroom. “I mean, it looks sort of nice, so she could just have it there for decoration or something. But it’s usually right near all the other soaps and her loofah, so I think it’s probably something she actually uses while under the water.” “I really don’t know how it all works,” Ferris added. “All I know is that in between Sarah getting into the shower and getting out, there’s a rock involved.” Ferris, who said he was unable to determine exactly when in the showering process the rock first comes into play, told reporters he is equally clueless about what part of the body the rock is used on. In addition, Ferris said he occasionally inspects the roughly 3-ounce object when he’s in Milstein’s shower, and told reporters that the rock is nearly always wet and is occasionally moved to slightly different spots within the bathtub, leading him to believe that his girlfriend uses it fairly regularly. He also noted his girlfriend’s bathing time never seems particularly longer than the average person’s considering she has added a rock into the mix. Ferris added that all attempts to incorporate the rock into his own shower routine have ultimately been unsuccessful. “I tried rubbing it on my skin once, and it hurt,” Ferris said, concluding that pouring soap and water directly onto the rock neither made it softer nor easier on his skin. “I could maybe see how it could get some dirt off of your body, but it seems too painful to work. Her skin usually looks nice though, so maybe I’m wrong.” “There is a chance it could be a hair thing,” Ferris continued. “Maybe she rubs the rock in her hair? I don’t know.” Ferris confirmed he has considered numerous reasons for why his girlfriend uses the rock in the shower, including that she has some type of skin condition, that the rock is some sort of weird tradition her family has, or that everyone uses rocks in the shower and he has been out of the loop the entire time. “It could be for cleaning the bathtub,” said Ferris, adding he once suspected the rock was a device for making the bathroom smell nice, but then noticed it had no discernible smell whatsoever. “Like every few weekends she scrubs the tub with this rock? I guess I could see Sarah doing that.” While Ferris said he is mostly certain that the rock was initially purchased at a home goods store of some kind, he was not able to completely rule out the possibility it was just a rock that his girlfriend found on the ground and decided to put in her shower. “I wonder if I should put a rock in my shower for when she’s over here,” said Ferris, who said he once tried to locate a rock at a Bed Bath & Beyond, but left after not wanting to walk up to a sales clerk and ask them where they kept their “shower rocks.” “Or I could just tell her to leave a rock at my place if she wants.” “I’m probably not going to do that,” Ferris added. At press time, a visibly perplexed Ferris had seen the rock sitting in Milstein’s trashcan and then looked in the shower to see another rock sitting in its place.

rubitrightintomyeyes: theonion: Rock Apparently Factors Into Girlfriend’s Shower Routine SEATTLE—Saying he was confused about the full...

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followthebluebell: roane72: mapelie: everythingfox: Mission failed Ummm. Abort. The yawn is what kills me. “Oh. Yeah, i was gonna take a nap. So sleepy honkshoo.” This is a really good example of appeasement behavior in cats.  The kitten wants to play, but stops because the older cat has their ears back.  Kitten backs down to show a loss of interest— at that point, you can see the older cat blink slowly.  This is one of the ways cats demonstrate trust and understanding.   The kitten turns away, to further cement a lack of interest in playtime at the moment.  The kitten lies down slowly, occasionally looking to the older cat for more approval.  Finally, the little yawn at the end isn’t to go ‘i’m sleepy’, but rather as a calming signal.  Cats consider sleeping to be a communal activity.  By settling down and imitating the older cat, the younger cat is displaying ‘yes, I understand Now Is Not Playtime, we’re cool, right?’ : followthebluebell: roane72: mapelie: everythingfox: Mission failed Ummm. Abort. The yawn is what kills me. “Oh. Yeah, i was gonna take a nap. So sleepy honkshoo.” This is a really good example of appeasement behavior in cats.  The kitten wants to play, but stops because the older cat has their ears back.  Kitten backs down to show a loss of interest— at that point, you can see the older cat blink slowly.  This is one of the ways cats demonstrate trust and understanding.   The kitten turns away, to further cement a lack of interest in playtime at the moment.  The kitten lies down slowly, occasionally looking to the older cat for more approval.  Finally, the little yawn at the end isn’t to go ‘i’m sleepy’, but rather as a calming signal.  Cats consider sleeping to be a communal activity.  By settling down and imitating the older cat, the younger cat is displaying ‘yes, I understand Now Is Not Playtime, we’re cool, right?’
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end0skeletal-undead: Hold still. This creature was recorded going 2,569 days without moving.Salamanders play the long game, with many species living surprisingly long lives. But among these enduring amphibians, there is one outlier – the olm, also known as the proteus. It has been well documented that these small white cave-dwelling salamanders can live well into their hundreds, but scientists have now gained new insight into the creatures’ glacial pace of life.In a study which makes sloths look recklessly hyperactive, divers documenting the movements of olms in Herzegovinian caves found that over a decade, individuals tended to move less than 10 metres in total. However, one extraordinarily inert individual was found not to have bothered moving once in over seven years. Olms have no predators, are highly resistant to starvation – able to go without food for several years – are blind and live in complete darkness underground and underwater. They are apparently only compelled to move in order to mate, which they do on average around once every 12.5 years.In the caves in which they dwell food is typically scarce, but when they are able, olms feed on small crustaceans such as small shrimps, snails and occasionally insects.Read the full article here.Photo credit here via Getty: end0skeletal-undead: Hold still. This creature was recorded going 2,569 days without moving.Salamanders play the long game, with many species living surprisingly long lives. But among these enduring amphibians, there is one outlier – the olm, also known as the proteus. It has been well documented that these small white cave-dwelling salamanders can live well into their hundreds, but scientists have now gained new insight into the creatures’ glacial pace of life.In a study which makes sloths look recklessly hyperactive, divers documenting the movements of olms in Herzegovinian caves found that over a decade, individuals tended to move less than 10 metres in total. However, one extraordinarily inert individual was found not to have bothered moving once in over seven years. Olms have no predators, are highly resistant to starvation – able to go without food for several years – are blind and live in complete darkness underground and underwater. They are apparently only compelled to move in order to mate, which they do on average around once every 12.5 years.In the caves in which they dwell food is typically scarce, but when they are able, olms feed on small crustaceans such as small shrimps, snails and occasionally insects.Read the full article here.Photo credit here via Getty

end0skeletal-undead: Hold still. This creature was recorded going 2,569 days without moving.Salamanders play the long game, with many...

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wemblingfool: lyinginbedmon: gahdamnpunk: How is this NOT harassment? I have no words.. Something I remember from my Criminal Law classes is that, quite genuinely, looking at someone (occasionally even pointedly not doing so) can constitute assault. It seems absurd, looking at someone? Where’s the harm, right? Well, it turns out it’s so that the law has recourse against people who just stand in a public space and start through someone’s living room window. For weeks. Just randomly chasing somebody, even without intent to actually harm, is legally assault. It’s not harmless, it’s months or even years of therapy and paranoia against ever going outside your home, if you even think your home is still safe. TLDR: Yes the law has already seen you play “I’m not touching you” and it is already fed up with your BS. This absolutely is terrorism What the everloving fuck. : wemblingfool: lyinginbedmon: gahdamnpunk: How is this NOT harassment? I have no words.. Something I remember from my Criminal Law classes is that, quite genuinely, looking at someone (occasionally even pointedly not doing so) can constitute assault. It seems absurd, looking at someone? Where’s the harm, right? Well, it turns out it’s so that the law has recourse against people who just stand in a public space and start through someone’s living room window. For weeks. Just randomly chasing somebody, even without intent to actually harm, is legally assault. It’s not harmless, it’s months or even years of therapy and paranoia against ever going outside your home, if you even think your home is still safe. TLDR: Yes the law has already seen you play “I’m not touching you” and it is already fed up with your BS. This absolutely is terrorism What the everloving fuck.
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lyinginbedmon: gahdamnpunk: How is this NOT harassment? I have no words.. Something I remember from my Criminal Law classes is that, quite genuinely, looking at someone (occasionally even pointedly not doing so) can constitute assault. It seems absurd, looking at someone? Where’s the harm, right? Well, it turns out it’s so that the law has recourse against people who just stand in a public space and start through someone’s living room window. For weeks. Just randomly chasing somebody, even without intent to actually harm, is legally assault. It’s not harmless, it’s months or even years of therapy and paranoia against ever going outside your home, if you even think your home is still safe. TLDR: Yes the law has already seen you play “I’m not touching you” and it is already fed up with your BS. : AAMIR KHAN Follow @hdni2803 This is the most fucked up shit I've ever read frightening girls Yesterday, 04:41 PM I once approached a teenage girl (around 14 years old) by asking her for directions at first. Then I proceeded to ask for her name. She became afraid and started walking away. I followed her, and then she went from walking briskly to running. Her gait was peculiar, because she ran like a newborn fawn, turning around every so often, trying to see if I am still following. (Now, I want to make clear that I absolutely abhor rape and did not have any intention in that direction, not molestation not any of that.) Initiate * Joined: Dec 2017 Posts: 139 She had no reason to be frightened. I wasn't gonna anything. But the feeling when you follow a girl and she notices you, and she tries to loose you or picks up the pace. That is kind of a good feeling. You become important to her. You are no longer some random insignificant face in the crowd. I know it is kind of low-level behaviour. But I do enjoy doing that. I go to another city, look for a girl that is walking by herself and start following her. After a while they notice you. After dark, after sunset it may suffice to just walk in the same general direction as a girl that is valking in front of you. They become paranoid. I recommend you lonely incels try it some time. Just to make her afraid. If you know your limits and don't actually harass -let alone rape- that girl, it should be harmless psychological fun. Ren Follow @buckmayn I literally feel disease sick men are a fucking AAMIR KHAN @hdni2803 at This is the most fucked up shit I've ever read - edaeocilulies. nit. m 12:22 PM - 5 Oct 2019 32,388 Retweets 107,390 Likes > lyinginbedmon: gahdamnpunk: How is this NOT harassment? I have no words.. Something I remember from my Criminal Law classes is that, quite genuinely, looking at someone (occasionally even pointedly not doing so) can constitute assault. It seems absurd, looking at someone? Where’s the harm, right? Well, it turns out it’s so that the law has recourse against people who just stand in a public space and start through someone’s living room window. For weeks. Just randomly chasing somebody, even without intent to actually harm, is legally assault. It’s not harmless, it’s months or even years of therapy and paranoia against ever going outside your home, if you even think your home is still safe. TLDR: Yes the law has already seen you play “I’m not touching you” and it is already fed up with your BS.
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more general IT Company than programming but I hope it still fits here: toggl.com YOU WANT TO WORK FOR A So LET'S POP THE HOOD AND SEE WHAT KIND OF PEOPLE IT TAKES TO TECH COMPANY? KEEP THE ENGINE RUNNING: KITCHEN FOUNTAIN OFFICE OF NINJA Qurifed GROWTH OUTDO LAND 9HAXIMUM lead ENPUTO 3 CFO developer face PRODUCT 5 LEAD Snace free REVELATION FRONT EN6 1) 0BM/SEO LEADGEN CAMP SUPPORT (8 CEO NERF GUN WAR ZONE 2 CUSTOMER SOCIAL MEDIA HIPSTER incoming tickets 10 SERVERS IN-HOUSE DESIGNER 11 BACKEND 9ENGINEER 15 MART VIRKUS THE CAST овм/SEO 1) LEADGEN 2 CUSTOMER Front line troops with nerves of steel. Customer support Black wizards of the Internet, skilled in the dark art of commandos have an uncanny ability to say "no" without it sounding like "no". Mostly peaceful. generating clicks, traffic and conversions. What, you think you found this comic by chance? 3 CFO HIPSTER The vault keeper. Tasked with maintaining fiscal responsibility. Also has to say "no" a lot, but lets silly expense requests slide occasionally to maintain peace and illusion of democracy Communicates in GIFS exclusively Social media hipsters are the only people who think "tweeting" counts as a skill on LinkedIn (and will ask to endorse it relentlessly). 6FRONT-N DEVS 5 LEAD A.K.A. "not actual engineers" in backend vocab. Heavily into classic rock or gangsta rap (or both). Obscurity of their hobbies is only matched by that of their T-shirt slogans. The buck stops here. Has keyboard shortcuts for phrases like "do it", "how hard can it be?" and "no." Not very peaceful. </Head Bady В СЕо OFFICE A.K.A. "The Big Cheese" CEOS feel most comfortable Ever wonder where your plane tickets, free snacks and gadgets come from? That's the work of an Office Ninja. The best Ninjas operate when facing challenges, so expect big changes (or a surprise product launch) when things start working too smoothly without ever being noticed. 9 KEND 10 SERVERS The non-glamorous techie. A watchful protector and a silent knight they keep the business up and running. He's the hero the company deserves (but not the one it needs) The only ones working 24/7. Go servers! 11) DESIGNER Arare beast, as most creatives prefer to roam free, hopping from one project to another. It's best to give them creative control to reduce chance of escape or violent rebellion. toggl.com Mart Virkus@ blog.toggl.com more general IT Company than programming but I hope it still fits here

more general IT Company than programming but I hope it still fits here

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Her bio read “It’s a bio, no a CV.”: 20:14 O 11% Claire Today 18:23 Am I supposed to send my CV to you separate or do you just want a covering letter? Covering letter is enough Could I get a job description to base it off please? Today 19:35 Lonely, mildly depressed single female seeking remotely stable man friend to people watch in reality and via Netflix Responsibilities include: Chaperoning to live music events, cinemas and shitty Dundee bars, perhaps occasionally a nightclub. Corresponding via a range of media within adequate times. Ability to tolerate prolonged bouts of complaining about life or work as well a questionable music taste. Providing mental and physical support in a range of activities including the gym. Spooning and perhaps sexual duties. Temporary post. Potential to become permanent. I'm a business teacher, this is my shit right here Today 20:06 Dear Claire, I'm writing this letter in regards to the temporary/permanent position of Partner. Please find my desperate attempt at wooing below. I am a reasonably stable Male that has previous experience in dating/ being a partner, with varying levels of success. Can deal with copious amounts of complaining over different forms of communication, very rarely leaves on read. Prefer outdoor activities to indoor exercise but can do. Will deal with drinking sessions professionally until shots are ordered though will still find way home. Sexual performance may vary. Thank you for taking the time to review my application, I look forward to hearing from you and hopefully progressing to the next stage of a date. I can't believe you actually wrote me a cover letter it's one of the better ones I've had so I guess we could do an "interview". Type a message... GIF Her bio read “It’s a bio, no a CV.”
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