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prismatic-bell: kari-izumi: dancinbutterfly: edenfenixblogs: the-omniscient-narrator: spacevinci: somethingratchet: sheisraging: Cindy: Hey… can I be a Jew? Rabbi: No. Cindy: Can I be a Jew? Rabbi: No. Cindy: Can I be a Jew? Rabbi: You really want this? Sincerely? Not ‘cause this one’s trying to blackmail me for something stupid when I was 19 or for broccoli with your dinner? What is this for you? Cindy: Honestly, I think I found my people. I was raised in a church where I was told to believe and pray. And if I was bad, I’d go to hell. And if I was good, I’d go to heaven. And if I’d ask Jesus, he’d forgive me and that was that. And here y’all are sayin’ ain’t no hell. Ain’t sure about heaven. And if you do something wrong, you got to figure it out yourself. And as far as God’s concerned, it’s your job to keep asking questions and to keep learning and to keep arguing. It’s like a verb. It’s like … you do God. And that’s a lot of work, but I think I’m in, as least as far as I can see it. I mean, maybe I’ll learn more and say fuck the whole thing, I mean, but I wanna learn more, and I think I gotta be in it to do that. You know… Does that make sense? Shit, did I just talk myself out of it? Rabbi: Ask me again. Cindy: Can I be a Jew? Rabbi: Yes. I cried so hard during this scene. First of all, this is beautiful. Second of all, as a contextual note, the rabbi said no for a reason. In Jewish conversion, one of the steps is that you must be discouraged at least three times. This comes from the story of Ruth, where Naomi told her not to follow her back to the Jewish tribe three times before giving in. Third of all, this is beautiful. Adrienne KILLED it in those scenes. I wept with her! “It’s like a verb.” She wants to work on her faith continuously and that was gorgeous and so honest. THIS WAS SO IMPORTANT DO U UNDERSTAND. We aren’t a people who actively convert people. You’ll never see a Jewish person try to convert you. We believe in everyone’s right to believe what they want. But it was so nice to see someone who wasn’t raised in it be able to see value in my faith. I have never seen anything like that on tv before Not only that?? Its one of the only times I’ve ever seen Judaism The Faith and Religion ever actually articulated on screen. What do we believe? We believe that You Choose To Do God. Thats why we’re the Chosen People - because we Chose to Opt In To Doing God this particular way. I have never in my life before seen any form of media EVER express what Jews ACTUALLY BELIEVE ABOUT THE UNIVERSE out loud but OITNB did. And when people ask me? I always throw them here. Because it’s dead on. You do God (Jewishly) and you have to choose it. That’s what we believe. That’s it. Thats the entire thing. And this is the only time we have EVER had ANY representation and I will cherish it always. And for those of you who didn’t see the show? She got to bathe in a mikvah equivalent and convert fully so yes, Cindy is as Jewish as the whitest Ashkenazi Jew. More, because according to the sages, the convert is to be praised for their choice and their dedication. And as such, any children she has will be Jewish too. <3 Love for Cindy. Love to any religious Jews out there who feel unseen in media (you’re right, we aren’t seen). Love for any converts out there who don’t feel Jewish enough (you are - no matter what branch you converted in). Extra love for all my Jews of Color (no addendum - just love to you all period). Stay strong out there yall. Write yourselves into some stories and talk about our faith okay? We deserve to be seen and known, even if we aren’t converting. Demystification is part of the fight against antisemitism. All of this, but ALSOit’s so rare to see black people get to be any other religion of Baptist Christian. Or to even talk about that not all of us believe in God in the way we’re been taught. Most of what I’ve learned about Judaism I learned through the Jewish bloggers I’ve found here like @prismatic-bell @realsadjewishhours and @wetwareproblem among others, but even as an agnostic black woman, I was just as happy to see Cindy find her own way, and even happier to hear that they actually did right with the conversion process this time. And @dancinbutterfly’s last line is why, when my rabbi said I should go to rabbinic school, I said…..no.Rabbi means teacher, and there are a ton of good Jewish teachers of Jews out there. But there aren’t so many Jewish teachers of gentiles. It’s why I work at cons under the name Oy Vay Productions. I am like you, except where I’m not, and where I’m not should not have to be frightening or mysterious to you. And then, when someone is all “well the Jews are a bunch of wealthy lizards,” you can remember me, think of me teaching you not just about anime but about the fact that Jews are just people out here doing how we do, and instead of “that seems possibly incorrect but I don’t know enough about Jews to dispute it,” you can say “that is not true, I have met and been befriended by a Jew, shared a meal and a class talked, and I know better.”I do my teaching by being a loud and proud Jew who is out here doing G-d an living my life. There are plenty of rabbis with skills I could only dream of having. But what I do is just as important to protecting and preserving Am Yisrael.: prismatic-bell: kari-izumi: dancinbutterfly: edenfenixblogs: the-omniscient-narrator: spacevinci: somethingratchet: sheisraging: Cindy: Hey… can I be a Jew? Rabbi: No. Cindy: Can I be a Jew? Rabbi: No. Cindy: Can I be a Jew? Rabbi: You really want this? Sincerely? Not ‘cause this one’s trying to blackmail me for something stupid when I was 19 or for broccoli with your dinner? What is this for you? Cindy: Honestly, I think I found my people. I was raised in a church where I was told to believe and pray. And if I was bad, I’d go to hell. And if I was good, I’d go to heaven. And if I’d ask Jesus, he’d forgive me and that was that. And here y’all are sayin’ ain’t no hell. Ain’t sure about heaven. And if you do something wrong, you got to figure it out yourself. And as far as God’s concerned, it’s your job to keep asking questions and to keep learning and to keep arguing. It’s like a verb. It’s like … you do God. And that’s a lot of work, but I think I’m in, as least as far as I can see it. I mean, maybe I’ll learn more and say fuck the whole thing, I mean, but I wanna learn more, and I think I gotta be in it to do that. You know… Does that make sense? Shit, did I just talk myself out of it? Rabbi: Ask me again. Cindy: Can I be a Jew? Rabbi: Yes. I cried so hard during this scene. First of all, this is beautiful. Second of all, as a contextual note, the rabbi said no for a reason. In Jewish conversion, one of the steps is that you must be discouraged at least three times. This comes from the story of Ruth, where Naomi told her not to follow her back to the Jewish tribe three times before giving in. Third of all, this is beautiful. Adrienne KILLED it in those scenes. I wept with her! “It’s like a verb.” She wants to work on her faith continuously and that was gorgeous and so honest. THIS WAS SO IMPORTANT DO U UNDERSTAND. We aren’t a people who actively convert people. You’ll never see a Jewish person try to convert you. We believe in everyone’s right to believe what they want. But it was so nice to see someone who wasn’t raised in it be able to see value in my faith. I have never seen anything like that on tv before Not only that?? Its one of the only times I’ve ever seen Judaism The Faith and Religion ever actually articulated on screen. What do we believe? We believe that You Choose To Do God. Thats why we’re the Chosen People - because we Chose to Opt In To Doing God this particular way. I have never in my life before seen any form of media EVER express what Jews ACTUALLY BELIEVE ABOUT THE UNIVERSE out loud but OITNB did. And when people ask me? I always throw them here. Because it’s dead on. You do God (Jewishly) and you have to choose it. That’s what we believe. That’s it. Thats the entire thing. And this is the only time we have EVER had ANY representation and I will cherish it always. And for those of you who didn’t see the show? She got to bathe in a mikvah equivalent and convert fully so yes, Cindy is as Jewish as the whitest Ashkenazi Jew. More, because according to the sages, the convert is to be praised for their choice and their dedication. And as such, any children she has will be Jewish too. <3 Love for Cindy. Love to any religious Jews out there who feel unseen in media (you’re right, we aren’t seen). Love for any converts out there who don’t feel Jewish enough (you are - no matter what branch you converted in). Extra love for all my Jews of Color (no addendum - just love to you all period). Stay strong out there yall. Write yourselves into some stories and talk about our faith okay? We deserve to be seen and known, even if we aren’t converting. Demystification is part of the fight against antisemitism. All of this, but ALSOit’s so rare to see black people get to be any other religion of Baptist Christian. Or to even talk about that not all of us believe in God in the way we’re been taught. Most of what I’ve learned about Judaism I learned through the Jewish bloggers I’ve found here like @prismatic-bell @realsadjewishhours and @wetwareproblem among others, but even as an agnostic black woman, I was just as happy to see Cindy find her own way, and even happier to hear that they actually did right with the conversion process this time. And @dancinbutterfly’s last line is why, when my rabbi said I should go to rabbinic school, I said…..no.Rabbi means teacher, and there are a ton of good Jewish teachers of Jews out there. But there aren’t so many Jewish teachers of gentiles. It’s why I work at cons under the name Oy Vay Productions. I am like you, except where I’m not, and where I’m not should not have to be frightening or mysterious to you. And then, when someone is all “well the Jews are a bunch of wealthy lizards,” you can remember me, think of me teaching you not just about anime but about the fact that Jews are just people out here doing how we do, and instead of “that seems possibly incorrect but I don’t know enough about Jews to dispute it,” you can say “that is not true, I have met and been befriended by a Jew, shared a meal and a class talked, and I know better.”I do my teaching by being a loud and proud Jew who is out here doing G-d an living my life. There are plenty of rabbis with skills I could only dream of having. But what I do is just as important to protecting and preserving Am Yisrael.
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geneeste: agenderlal: ralndrops: I CANT BREATHE haha its so funny how he just harasses her at work where she’s not allowed to end the conversation Okay. We’re going to sit down and have a talk. I work in customer support, and 99% of my job is interacting directly with customers. In an average week, I have around 300 live chats with customers. This is just chat, this doesn’t count emails or phone support. In the year and a half since I’ve been in my current job, I have: repeatedly been called a bitch and a cunt; been told to go fuck myself and to fuck off; been explicitly propositioned for sexual favors; I have been repeatedly harassed by at least two men who describe to me in detail the state of their genitals; have had multiple customers pretend to have medical emergencies/pretend to be dying; have heard basically every disgusting thing you can think of regarding bodily functions, and then some. Do I enjoy those chats when I get them? No. But do you know what I really, really dread? The kinds of chats that really stress me out? It’s chats like the one in the pictures. It’s chats in which the customers aren’t being explicitly awful. Where their harassment is mild, conversations that, on the surface, are downright pleasant. Because every time I end a chat of this nature, every time I make the decision to ban a customer from our chat service, I have to defend it. I have to go to my employer and explain to them why I think a customer acted inappropriately enough that I refused to help them potentially spend money on our service or product. And it’s so, so hard to explain this kind of harassment, the kind of menace these chats communicate. William Holcomb up there, he doesn’t care that I’m a person, because to him I’m not. I’m not a person he’s ‘flirting’ with - I’m very far away, so far away in fact that I’m an object. I’m an easy target. He knows that as long as he isn’t too obvious, he can keep me on chat and play whatever game he came to play. He knows he has power over me that I don’t want him to have. Now, I’m lucky. My current employer is wonderful about these kinds of situations, and gives me the latitude to act on my best judgement. But I’m still working for a company that’s trying to make a profit, and that’s in the back of my mind whenever situations like this pop up, which is not infrequently. And I haven’t always worked for companies who cared about their employees in this way. Lots of CS agents don’t either. This is not flirting, and it isn’t funny. This is harassment, of someone who can’t really tell you to stop. Shame on you. : William Holcomb @Hulkomb I'm a bad flirter : ( Jeasica S. Hi, I'm Jessica! How can I help you fulfill your adidas needs today? What are you up to Did you need help with any Visitor: Jessica S.: adidas items today? Visitor:No, just lonely Jessica S.: This chat is for adidas items only Visitor:can we act like we're talking about shoes but really we're just talking Visitor: whats your favorite shoe We have to actually talk about the properties and technology in the shoe Jessica S.: How i wip Visitor:nikes look cooler tho Jessica S.: They weigh 6.7 ounces. Did you have any other adidas related questions? Visitor: you single Jessica S.: No. Did you have any other Visitor:one day we'll be able to tell our adidas related questions kids we met via adidas customer service chat room Jessica S. Iam married. Did you have any other adidas related questions? Visitor: 50% ofmarriagesiend in divorce geneeste: agenderlal: ralndrops: I CANT BREATHE haha its so funny how he just harasses her at work where she’s not allowed to end the conversation Okay. We’re going to sit down and have a talk. I work in customer support, and 99% of my job is interacting directly with customers. In an average week, I have around 300 live chats with customers. This is just chat, this doesn’t count emails or phone support. In the year and a half since I’ve been in my current job, I have: repeatedly been called a bitch and a cunt; been told to go fuck myself and to fuck off; been explicitly propositioned for sexual favors; I have been repeatedly harassed by at least two men who describe to me in detail the state of their genitals; have had multiple customers pretend to have medical emergencies/pretend to be dying; have heard basically every disgusting thing you can think of regarding bodily functions, and then some. Do I enjoy those chats when I get them? No. But do you know what I really, really dread? The kinds of chats that really stress me out? It’s chats like the one in the pictures. It’s chats in which the customers aren’t being explicitly awful. Where their harassment is mild, conversations that, on the surface, are downright pleasant. Because every time I end a chat of this nature, every time I make the decision to ban a customer from our chat service, I have to defend it. I have to go to my employer and explain to them why I think a customer acted inappropriately enough that I refused to help them potentially spend money on our service or product. And it’s so, so hard to explain this kind of harassment, the kind of menace these chats communicate. William Holcomb up there, he doesn’t care that I’m a person, because to him I’m not. I’m not a person he’s ‘flirting’ with - I’m very far away, so far away in fact that I’m an object. I’m an easy target. He knows that as long as he isn’t too obvious, he can keep me on chat and play whatever game he came to play. He knows he has power over me that I don’t want him to have. Now, I’m lucky. My current employer is wonderful about these kinds of situations, and gives me the latitude to act on my best judgement. But I’m still working for a company that’s trying to make a profit, and that’s in the back of my mind whenever situations like this pop up, which is not infrequently. And I haven’t always worked for companies who cared about their employees in this way. Lots of CS agents don’t either. This is not flirting, and it isn’t funny. This is harassment, of someone who can’t really tell you to stop. Shame on you.
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terrakion: decrystallize: witchtimez: onlyblackgirl: m4ge: m4ge: m4ge: m4ge: This came up on my facebook feed and I am so excited to see how generation Xers and Baby Boomers will find a way to use this to shit on millenials anyways nice okay we’re off to a good start oh boy do i have something to tell you about millennials, working, and debt that’s gonna absolutely blow your socks off banksy’s family found this article Why old people so mad. It’s funny because millennials can pretty much multitask like it’s second nature simply because it’s necessary to keep up with society, while baby boomers whine about reading subtitles and can’t seem to program anything more complicated than a VCR. But sure, ok, the kids are lazy and have entitlement complexes Older Generations: -Make comics about kids not knowing how books work- Millenials: -Read more books than anyone else- Older Generations: …no we changed our minds reading a lot is lazy and entitled now “laughfulable” : Millennials Are Out- Reading Older Generations But younger Americans value library services less than more senior cohorts, study finds terrakion: decrystallize: witchtimez: onlyblackgirl: m4ge: m4ge: m4ge: m4ge: This came up on my facebook feed and I am so excited to see how generation Xers and Baby Boomers will find a way to use this to shit on millenials anyways nice okay we’re off to a good start oh boy do i have something to tell you about millennials, working, and debt that’s gonna absolutely blow your socks off banksy’s family found this article Why old people so mad. It’s funny because millennials can pretty much multitask like it’s second nature simply because it’s necessary to keep up with society, while baby boomers whine about reading subtitles and can’t seem to program anything more complicated than a VCR. But sure, ok, the kids are lazy and have entitlement complexes Older Generations: -Make comics about kids not knowing how books work- Millenials: -Read more books than anyone else- Older Generations: …no we changed our minds reading a lot is lazy and entitled now “laughfulable”
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terrakion: decrystallize: witchtimez: onlyblackgirl: m4ge: m4ge: m4ge: m4ge: This came up on my facebook feed and I am so excited to see how generation Xers and Baby Boomers will find a way to use this to shit on millenials anyways nice okay we’re off to a good start oh boy do i have something to tell you about millennials, working, and debt that’s gonna absolutely blow your socks off banksy’s family found this article Why old people so mad. It’s funny because millennials can pretty much multitask like it’s second nature simply because it’s necessary to keep up with society, while baby boomers whine about reading subtitles and can’t seem to program anything more complicated than a VCR. But sure, ok, the kids are lazy and have entitlement complexes Older Generations: -Make comics about kids not knowing how books work- Millenials: -Read more books than anyone else- Older Generations: …no we changed our minds reading a lot is lazy and entitled now “laughfulable” : Millennials Are Out- Reading Older Generations But younger Americans value library services less than more senior cohorts, study finds terrakion: decrystallize: witchtimez: onlyblackgirl: m4ge: m4ge: m4ge: m4ge: This came up on my facebook feed and I am so excited to see how generation Xers and Baby Boomers will find a way to use this to shit on millenials anyways nice okay we’re off to a good start oh boy do i have something to tell you about millennials, working, and debt that’s gonna absolutely blow your socks off banksy’s family found this article Why old people so mad. It’s funny because millennials can pretty much multitask like it’s second nature simply because it’s necessary to keep up with society, while baby boomers whine about reading subtitles and can’t seem to program anything more complicated than a VCR. But sure, ok, the kids are lazy and have entitlement complexes Older Generations: -Make comics about kids not knowing how books work- Millenials: -Read more books than anyone else- Older Generations: …no we changed our minds reading a lot is lazy and entitled now “laughfulable”
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Banana Breadomg-humor.tumblr.com: The new bread order. x2 God tier Garlic bread Top tier Baguee onlon breed Baul Onlon bread Pan de yuca Brioche Croissant Good tier Tortila Pretzel Boer bread Ciabatta Pita bread Naan bread Mediocre tier Pumpernickel Rye bread Funpiin bread Com bread ihito bread Olive breaa Low tier Nul bread Ralsin bread Carraway seed bread Matza Whole grain Gluten-fre bread bread Shit tier Banana bread dundeey: wuqs: dykelapis: mate i've been on this website since 2010 and in five years i've never been more offended than seeing banana bread labeled shit tier fuck this image, man. literally fuck everything about this. this person does NOT understand bread. one, those top tier bread images are literally the worst examples of those types of breads. that baguette fucking pains me deep in my SOUL. and real croissants, good ones, rarely look like that if they're going to be properly flaky and delicious. and that bagel looks like it was made in a factory thirty years ago, preserved with fucking like latex or some shit what the hell but the worst, the most heinous of all crimes, is putting banana bread as shit tier? are you serious? have you had banana bread? have you EXPERIENCED it? you have it below fucking wonderbread-looking shit, below onion bread, and below a loaf someone haphazardly shoved fucking nuts in? banana bread loves you. banana bread sees that you bought too many bananas, that they've been sitting on your counter starting to get a little too ripe and says, hey, you know what it's okay, we all buy a few too many bananas sometimes, why not whip up some of me, good ole banana bread, and i'll be a sweet little treat, maybe a breakfast or a neat snack. fuck you. fuck you and your abhorrent ignorance of breads. i bet the best garlic bread you've had is from fucking olive garden you sack of reprehensible shit flakes Banana Breadomg-humor.tumblr.com
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dundeey: wuqs: dykelapis: mate i’ve been on this website since 2010 and in five years i’ve never been more offended than seeing banana bread labeled ‘shit tier’ fuck this image, man. literally fuck everything about this. this person does NOT understand bread. one, those top tier bread images are literally the worst examples of those types of breads. that baguette fucking pains me deep in my SOUL. and real croissants, good ones, rarely look like that if they’re going to be properly flaky and delicious. and that bagel looks like it was made in a factory thirty years ago, preserved with fucking like latex or some shit what the hell but the worst, the most heinous of all crimes, is putting banana bread as shit tier? are you serious? have you had banana bread? have you EXPERIENCED it? you have it below fucking wonderbread-looking shit, below onion bread, and below a loaf someone haphazardly shoved fucking nuts in? banana bread loves you. banana bread sees that you bought too many bananas, that they’ve been sitting on your counter starting to get a little too ripe and says, hey, you know what it’s okay, we all buy a few too many bananas sometimes, why not whip up some of me, good ole banana bread, and i’ll be a sweet little treat, maybe a breakfast or a neat snack. fuck you. fuck you and your abhorrent ignorance of breads. i bet the best garlic bread you’ve had is from fucking olive garden you sack of reprehensible shit flakes bread fandom grab your bread : The new bread order. х2 God tier Garlic bread Top tier Baguette Bayel Pan de yuca Onlon bread Brioche Croissant Good tier Tortilla Pretzel Ciabatta Pita bread Beer bread Naan bread Mediocre tier Pumpernickel Rye bread Pumpkin bread Corn bread White bread Ollve bread Low tier Gluten-free bread Ralsin bread Carraway seed bread Whole grain bread Nut bread Matza Shit tier Banana bread dundeey: wuqs: dykelapis: mate i’ve been on this website since 2010 and in five years i’ve never been more offended than seeing banana bread labeled ‘shit tier’ fuck this image, man. literally fuck everything about this. this person does NOT understand bread. one, those top tier bread images are literally the worst examples of those types of breads. that baguette fucking pains me deep in my SOUL. and real croissants, good ones, rarely look like that if they’re going to be properly flaky and delicious. and that bagel looks like it was made in a factory thirty years ago, preserved with fucking like latex or some shit what the hell but the worst, the most heinous of all crimes, is putting banana bread as shit tier? are you serious? have you had banana bread? have you EXPERIENCED it? you have it below fucking wonderbread-looking shit, below onion bread, and below a loaf someone haphazardly shoved fucking nuts in? banana bread loves you. banana bread sees that you bought too many bananas, that they’ve been sitting on your counter starting to get a little too ripe and says, hey, you know what it’s okay, we all buy a few too many bananas sometimes, why not whip up some of me, good ole banana bread, and i’ll be a sweet little treat, maybe a breakfast or a neat snack. fuck you. fuck you and your abhorrent ignorance of breads. i bet the best garlic bread you’ve had is from fucking olive garden you sack of reprehensible shit flakes bread fandom grab your bread
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College coffee storiesomg-humor.tumblr.com: pretty-boy-jon: ooswinssouffle: appropriately-inappropriate: rukafais: graveyardhorse: korrakun: my favorite college experience is when i had a 7am class and the kid next to me literally poured a monster energy drink into his coffee said "i'm going to die" and drank the whole thing i knew a guy who brewed his instant coffee with monster instead of water. three cups in two hours. i think he ascended to the astral realm the survivability of the human race never ceases to amaze me TABI ANECDOTE My final year I lived with engineering masters students. One night, I'm finishing up my final paper, I'm juuuust backing up my final copy, and my housemate's cat knocks a vase over onto my laptop. Which wouldn't be a problem except my cable had been chewed on (thanks Kobe), so the wiring was exposed. Circuits short out, I fling myself back to avoid electrocution and by the time we get the situation handled, my laptop AND my external hard drive have been fried by the surge. I mean, fried. Like, they-are-vaguely-smoking fried. I tart to cry, because there goes fifty percent of my final grade. Ahmad just goes "it's okay, we will fix". I'm like "how the fuck do you propose that?" And he's like "I have spare laptop." "THIS IS DUE IN THE AM!" And he looks me dead in the eye and goes, "I said I will help. Go get the laptop." So off I go. By the time I make it downstairs, there's this chemical Ireek/ in the kitchen. I go in and there he is, methodically crushing caffeine pills with the bottom of a glass on a ceramic plate, periodically dusting the powder into a cooking pot. Meanwhile, his coffee pot is chugging away on the counter. As I watch, he takes the coffee pot, empties it into the cooking pot, lets THAT come to a boil and dumps in some of his Turkish coffee, AND the remaining caffeine pill powder, which by now is starting to look uncomfortably like coke. He lets that steep, and by now the coffee/burning smell is so strong it's woken up all six of the other housemates, who have all come downstairs and are vacillating between staring at my laptop and at this concoction with undisguised horror. He pours this sludge into a mug, stirs in about four /tablespoons/ of sugar and slides it my way. | figure that I'm probably dead either way regardless, so I suck it back, through my teeth as I go. filtering the gror I've had three sips when it hits, and I feel my heart trip on a beat. I must have gone white cause he nods, all pleased, and points me at his laptop. Long story short, I got an week's extension, didn't sleep for five days, had a conversation with my BLINDS in SPANISH, and got a B+, with a note that it was an "engaging read and well-written, when intelligible". To this day, coffee any stronger than a pale off-beige makes my chest hurt. I honestly thought he was going to drink the coffee and perform was magic on the laptop but. nope. even better. Honest to god, I really want to know how that conversation with the blinds went. Bruh. BRUH. College coffee storiesomg-humor.tumblr.com
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