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apricot-studies: smartstudy: Hey guys. I’m glad to be finally posting my “mental breakdown survival guide”. As you know I struggle a lot with mental health, and so I have been through a lot of breakdowns. So many that I actually dropped out of university after 3 weeks in 2016 and had to take the whole year off. Because of this, I’ve made it my mission to help others with mental health issues as much as I can, so you don’t have to go through what I’ve been through. Anyway, here is my guide. I tried to keep it general, and actually useful. If you have any questions or additions please feel free to add them. And as ever, if you want to talk to me about studying with mental illness or want to see a post on a specific topic, please feel free to message me. thank you so much for this : Saving Your Grades From A Mental Health Crisis What To Do Before, During, And After by SmartStudy.tumblr.com IF YOUR GRADES ARE IN IMMEDIATE DANGER CONTACT YOUR TEACHERS This should be the first thing you do when you realise you're in crisis. Email them, and explain your situation in short, professional terms. You do not have to include details about your condition. "I have a mental health condition" should suffice as to the nature of the issue. Tell them that you are going to arrange to see a medical professional as soon as possible, and ask what process you should go through to defer/get an extension on assessment, and if they can help you in any way. Other people you may have to contact or CC in the email (depending on your school): University High School Head of House Class Coordinator Faculty/School Admin Disability Advisor Grade Coordinator Head of Department Academic Admin Counsellor School Counsellor Student Advocate BOOK A DOCTOR/THERAPIST APPOINTMENT ASAP This will be the person who can vouch for you the most. It's best if you have seen them before and they know you. If you can't get an appointment within a few days, call them and email them (if you haven't seen them before this will not work). Make sure to check out what counselling your university or school offers. During this appointment, the priority is to make a plan to get you back on your feet. This effort will not be useful if you stay a mess. Once you've figured that out, get two things from this person. One is a medical certificate/letter stating that you have, in fact, been going through this crisis. Second is a letter that describes the nature of the crisis, what treatment you're going through, and which people to contact (psychiatrists, etc.) who can vouch for this. Note: The reason I say to get two letters is because there is still a huge stigma around mental illness, and you don't want to reveal that you've got a disorder that's highly stigmatised, only to have it come back and bite you in the ass later. Don't provide details unless it's necessary or asked for. A STUDENT KNOW YOUR RIGHTS AS Most schools and institutions will have a list of a student's rights and responsibilities online. Look them up. Know what your rights are as a student. Also look to see if there are state/national laws protecting you, or if your school is a part of a network of schools that has its own code. Some people working in schools still think mental health issues are trivial, and you never know when they're going to ignore a rule to suit themselves. Make sure you can pick on this if it happens to you. Pretty much all schools will have protection in place for students with mental illnesses and disabilities, so even if you a miss a deadline for a form or make another mistake, they should take your exceptional circumstances into account. This is where a student or disability advisor from school can help you. ottom IF YOU HAVEN'T REACHED CRISIS YET TALK TO A DOCTOR/THERAPIST/COUNSELLOR/TRUSTED ADULT If you're going through a hard time, talk to someone who can help you. Any trusted adult or professional can help you get back on your feet before it's too late, or refer you to someone who can. If it's a new issue, you'll have to see someone like a GP who can refer you to a therapist or mental health service. Talk to them about what's been happening, and say that you need help. Sometimes, even talking about the problem can help you feel better. In these situations, they can also help you figure out what you can do at school to catch up/get special help. FIGURE OUT HOW TO STUDY WHILE IN A BAD STATE Even if you're getting help, it might be some time before you're fully back on track. In these instances, try to make the best of a bad situation. Can't leave the house? Access lecture recordings and eBooks. Ask your friends to send you their notes, or ask the teacher if you can submit your homework via email, or through a friend. Have trouble concentrating? Figure out how long you can study without needing a break, and make a schedule around that. Always make sure to ask your teachers if they can help you with this. Whether it be slightly changing the requirements or conditions of a piece of assessment, or simply their understanding that you may not be able to attend perfectly, it can make a big difference with your overall marks. If they don't know you're struggling, they can't help! DON'T PUSH YOURSELF OR OVERTHINK When you realise there's an issue, it's easy to fall into panic or try to power through. Don't do this. It'll just make you more stressed and aggravate the existing problems, which will make things much worse in the long run. Though it's hard to believe sometimes, your health and mental health are more important than your grades. You can't ignore your mind when it's screaming at you that something is wrong. Listen to it, and be easy on yourself. The best way to get back to your full potential to ask for help and give yourself what you need. Take a break when you need one and practise self-care. It's more important than you might things. RECOVERING FROM A BREAKDOWN ACCEPT THAT YOU'VE BEEN THROUGH SOMETHING MAJOR Once the worst has passed, some people try to brush it off and pretend it never happened. They can feel ashamed or embarrassed about what they went through. However, there is absolutely nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about, especially if you had a pre-existing mental health condition. Every life has ups and downs and just because yours were a bit more serious than some people's, it doesn't mean that you're weak somehow. The best thing you can do for yourself is to recognise what happened, and work to prevent it from happening again by setting up crisis plans and support networks. GET TUTORING TO CATCH UP If you've fallen behind, don't worry. There are plenty of ways to catch yourself up and get back on track. The best way is to hire a tutor. They can guide you through the work, help you understand difficult concepts, and identify the places you need more help. Yes, tutors can be expensive, but there's a way to get around this. See if there is anyone who took your class the year before who might be willing to tutor you for an hour each week for a discounted prince. Similarly, see if there are any students who can help you in exchange for something like instrument lessons. And if any of your friends are academically gifted, I'm sure they'd be able to help. If all else fails, go to office hours and any free tutoring sessions your school or university offers. Do some research, ask around, see what's there. PACE YOURSELF AND DON'T RUSH IN After a breakdown or crisis, you may be tempted to throw yourself back into your work to catch up. Don't! You'll become overwhelmed and end up back at square one. Remember, you've just been through a very difficult situation and you're not going to get better overnight. Ease yourself in. I definitely recommend starting with a reduced or part-time study load if possible. Remember that you may not be back at your full capacity just yet, and difficulties concentrating and being motivated could make things hard. By starting off slowly, you're able to get used to studying again without too much pressure. DEVELOP A ROUTINE Yes, this advice is in every piece of study advice ever, but you shouldn't develop just any routine. Develop one that allows you plenty of breaks and takes into consider any issues you may have with fatigue or focusing. If your breakdown was caused by overwork, make sure this one is easier on you. Things to include you could include in a healthy routine (but don't micromanage!): "I feel crap" time* Breaks and meals Plenty of sleep and rest "You" time (treat yo self) Time to plan for the next week Exercise (have you tried yoga? Kidding) Meditation/mindfulness Friend/family social time * Remember that the thoughts and feelings caused by mental illness are not shameful, and ignoring and forcing them down will only make them worse. If you need to lie in bed feeling miserable, do it. THINGS TO REMEMBER DON'T COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS It can be easy to look at other people and see your own flaws, but it's important to try not to. Every person has different experiences and struggles, so it's not fair to yourself to look at someone without yours and think you're behind in some way. Taking longer to complete your studies isn't shameful. Making mistakes isn't shameful. Needing breaks isn't shameful. You'll get where you need to be in the end. Have patience. GRADES DON'T DEFINE YOU I spent so much of my life thinking my only worth came from my academic success. And guess what? This just led to more anxiety and depression. It's important to realise that things like grades, class rankings, GPAS, and "intelligence" aren't that important. Who you are and what you do is far more important than these arbitrary labels. THERE IS A STIGMA, SO BE PREPARED It's an unfortunate reality, but there is still a stigma against mental health issues and there is a chance it might affect your experiences while dealing with administrative staff and teachers. There have been stories about people telling their people supposed to be guiding them that they have mental health issues, and being dismissed because "it's a girl issue" or "it's all in their head". Be prepared in case this happens to you. Remind people that it's a medical condition and that you can get proof from medical professionals if need be. Plus, there is probably something in your school's policies or even the law that protects you when you have a mental illness. Remember that just because people are ignorant, that doesn't mean your issue is not 100% real and important. Don't let these people make you feel worse. YOU CAN DO THIS In our darkest moments, it can be hard to believe that we're capable of immense strength, but I promise you we are. Whatever obstacle is in your path right now - even if it's your brain chemistry - you are going to get through this. You've made it through every worst day you've had so far. You've made it through the dark and scary moments, and you've come out the other end stronger and wiser. Remember that you are strong, and even when you don't feel like it, there is always support available to help you realise that strength again. tmblimteom apricot-studies: smartstudy: Hey guys. I’m glad to be finally posting my “mental breakdown survival guide”. As you know I struggle a lot with mental health, and so I have been through a lot of breakdowns. So many that I actually dropped out of university after 3 weeks in 2016 and had to take the whole year off. Because of this, I’ve made it my mission to help others with mental health issues as much as I can, so you don’t have to go through what I’ve been through. Anyway, here is my guide. I tried to keep it general, and actually useful. If you have any questions or additions please feel free to add them. And as ever, if you want to talk to me about studying with mental illness or want to see a post on a specific topic, please feel free to message me. thank you so much for this
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vaporwavevocap: ryttu3k: darkwizardjamesmason: dienaziscum: fishcustardandclintbarton: huffingtonpost: Mom declares her daughter is done with homework in viral email. Blogger Bunmi Laditan sent her 10-year-old’s school a clear message. “Hello Maya’s teachers, Maya will be drastically reducing the amount of homework she does this year. She’s been very stressed and is starting to have physical symptoms such as chest pain and waking up at 4 a.m. worrying about her school workload. She’s not behind academically and very much enjoys school. We consulted with a tutor and a therapist suggested we lighten her workload. Doing 2-3 hours of homework after getting home at 4:30 is leaving little time for her to just be a child and enjoy family time and we’d like to avoid her sinking into a depression over this.” A++++ parenting 💜 I’ve talked with a whole cadre of child therapists and psychiatrists about this very issue. There is little conclusive evidence that homework significantly improves elementary school children’s grades, understanding of subjects, or facility with various operations, processes, etc. However, plenty of evidence suggests that ever-increasing amounts of homework for young children lead to stress, anxiety, emotional fatigue, resistance toward academics in general, lack of leisure time to build social/interpersonal skills, and poorer family relations.  (My kids were doing about 3 hours a week IN KINDERGARTEN, at age 5 – so that’s ½ hour every night, after a 6.5 hour school day, or else saving it up for long slogs over the weekend, even more disruptive. And that wasn’t including reading practice!) We have stopped doing homework altogether with my 7 year old as a result of severe anxiety/depression and a learning disability. She had gotten to a place where she had so little self confidence and truly believed that she was stupid and worthless, not just because of homework of course – but every time we tried to sit down to do homework with her, it’d end in tears with her really vehemently berating herself, and no amount of encouragement could ameliorate the damage done. Now, granted, she’s got other things going on besides just an overload of school work. But in NO WAY did the homework help her, either academically or emotionally.  No little kid should have to spend an hour or more each night getting through homework. Now, my deal with Siena is that if she wants to give her homework a shot, I will absolutely help her if she wishes for help, but I no longer force her to complete all of it or to work on it for some set length of time before finally throwing in the towel.  Guess what? With the pressure taken off, she’s actually doing MORE independent work now, purely out of the desire to learn and practice, than she ever was before we’d decided with her therapy team and school that homework was just not a thing this kid could handle. Luckily for my older daughter my school’s 3rd-grade team decided to hand out homework only 3x/week, and the sheets take no more than 15-20 minutes to complete. That is totally reasonable for 8-9 year olds!  Anyway tl;dr just because the school system may require it sure as shit doesn’t mean parents can’t, or shouldn’t, fight it. Do what’s right for your kid, and above all, let them be kids.  I eventually stopped doing homework because I was overwhelmed by it. There was an article just the other day in the local paper about a primary school that’s abolishing homework! You can read it here (autoplay video, gives you a few seconds to stop it). Homework is intrusive in a young child’s life. It makes sense for adults who will likely have to bring work home with them so in college it’s good training. But for young kids. No. Seriously I’m 100% on board with this. There are high school students expected to do three or four hours and beyond worth of homework every day. It’s fucking ridiculous. And I work in elementary school where we literally have little kids develop anxiety disorder and have panic attacks over homework and testing. This shit is not normal.: Maya's Homework 5:32 PM (9 minutes ago) Bunmi Laditan to Hello Maya's teachers, Maya will be drastically reducing the amount of homework she does this year. She's been very stressed and is starting to have physical symptoms such as chest pain and waking up at 4AM worrying about her school workload. She's not behind academically and very much enjoys school. We've consulted with a tutor and a therapist suggested we lighten her workload. Doing 2-3 hours of homework after getting home at 4:30 is leaving little time for her to just be a child and enjoy family time and we'd like to avoid her sinking into a depression over this. Thank you for understanding. warmly, Bunmi vaporwavevocap: ryttu3k: darkwizardjamesmason: dienaziscum: fishcustardandclintbarton: huffingtonpost: Mom declares her daughter is done with homework in viral email. Blogger Bunmi Laditan sent her 10-year-old’s school a clear message. “Hello Maya’s teachers, Maya will be drastically reducing the amount of homework she does this year. She’s been very stressed and is starting to have physical symptoms such as chest pain and waking up at 4 a.m. worrying about her school workload. She’s not behind academically and very much enjoys school. We consulted with a tutor and a therapist suggested we lighten her workload. Doing 2-3 hours of homework after getting home at 4:30 is leaving little time for her to just be a child and enjoy family time and we’d like to avoid her sinking into a depression over this.” A++++ parenting 💜 I’ve talked with a whole cadre of child therapists and psychiatrists about this very issue. There is little conclusive evidence that homework significantly improves elementary school children’s grades, understanding of subjects, or facility with various operations, processes, etc. However, plenty of evidence suggests that ever-increasing amounts of homework for young children lead to stress, anxiety, emotional fatigue, resistance toward academics in general, lack of leisure time to build social/interpersonal skills, and poorer family relations.  (My kids were doing about 3 hours a week IN KINDERGARTEN, at age 5 – so that’s ½ hour every night, after a 6.5 hour school day, or else saving it up for long slogs over the weekend, even more disruptive. And that wasn’t including reading practice!) We have stopped doing homework altogether with my 7 year old as a result of severe anxiety/depression and a learning disability. She had gotten to a place where she had so little self confidence and truly believed that she was stupid and worthless, not just because of homework of course – but every time we tried to sit down to do homework with her, it’d end in tears with her really vehemently berating herself, and no amount of encouragement could ameliorate the damage done. Now, granted, she’s got other things going on besides just an overload of school work. But in NO WAY did the homework help her, either academically or emotionally.  No little kid should have to spend an hour or more each night getting through homework. Now, my deal with Siena is that if she wants to give her homework a shot, I will absolutely help her if she wishes for help, but I no longer force her to complete all of it or to work on it for some set length of time before finally throwing in the towel.  Guess what? With the pressure taken off, she’s actually doing MORE independent work now, purely out of the desire to learn and practice, than she ever was before we’d decided with her therapy team and school that homework was just not a thing this kid could handle. Luckily for my older daughter my school’s 3rd-grade team decided to hand out homework only 3x/week, and the sheets take no more than 15-20 minutes to complete. That is totally reasonable for 8-9 year olds!  Anyway tl;dr just because the school system may require it sure as shit doesn’t mean parents can’t, or shouldn’t, fight it. Do what’s right for your kid, and above all, let them be kids.  I eventually stopped doing homework because I was overwhelmed by it. There was an article just the other day in the local paper about a primary school that’s abolishing homework! You can read it here (autoplay video, gives you a few seconds to stop it). Homework is intrusive in a young child’s life. It makes sense for adults who will likely have to bring work home with them so in college it’s good training. But for young kids. No. Seriously I’m 100% on board with this. There are high school students expected to do three or four hours and beyond worth of homework every day. It’s fucking ridiculous. And I work in elementary school where we literally have little kids develop anxiety disorder and have panic attacks over homework and testing. This shit is not normal.
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theonlysaylor: A Writing Cheat Sheet: for linking actions with emotions.  As always, click for HD. : emotion & body language body language: emotion Shiiting,1idgeting,grinning,L1Cking 11PS anticipation rubbing hands together slack-jawed, fixed gaze, unable to move awe clapping hands, shaking with laughter amusement slapping thighs, throwing head back biting smile back furrowed/lowered brow, flushed face, pointing ander or table, clenched fist/jaw, baring teeth throbbing veins in neck, scowling glaring, eye rolling, pressed lips, sighing annoyance fidgeting, sweating, playing with jewelry quickened breath, dry mouth/swallowing anxiety biting nails, stuttering, biting lip yawning, fridgeting, doodling, tapping feet boredom or shaking leg, playing with pen/pencil/hair lifted chin, head high, puffed chest, back straight, shoulders back, deliberate movement confidence tilted head, furrowed brow, shrugging, squinting confusion lifted chin, smirk, sneer, purse lips contempt emotion & body language body language: emotion twisted lips, twisted smile, half smile, shaking head, rolling eyes cynical one shoulder shrug, playing with hair/ring necklace/earring/earlobe, scratching face/ nose/neck, shuffling, fidgeting, looking down deceptive hesitation in speech, nodding while saying no shaking head while saving ves, licking lips covering/touching mouth crossed arms, hands hidden, keeping object or person between self and percieved threat defensive winking, touching hair or clothing, eye contact, looking up through lashes, arching des1ire dilated pupils, stretching wide-eyed (shocked), narrow-eyed (suspicious) raised brows (shocked),low brow (suspicious), crinkled nose, curled lip, turning away clenched eyes, covering mouth/nose, flinch disqust frown, creased brows, crossed arms, pressed lips, narrowed eyes displeasure fidgeting, rubbing/scratching neck, wide-eyed distress plaving with iewelry, rapid-breathing, fixing sleeves, holding self, trembling blush, stuttering, stammering, unable to embarrassment make eye contact, covering face, holding self, blinking back tears, looking down or at lights rubbing eyes/temples, yawning, staring off slouching, closing eyes, moving slow fatique emotion & body language body language: emotion shrinking back, wide-eyed, hunched shoulders, flinching, shaking/trembling, holding self fear shaking head, pinching bridge of nose frustrationrubing temples, clenching hands grinding/clenching teeth shaking with sobs, staring off, trembling, shuddered breaths, gasping sobs, curling in on self, lashing out/hitting things grief smile, laugh, hum, whistle, dancing, jumping hugging, giggling, crinkled eyes happiness eye contact, open posture, smiling, looking honesty upwards tapping feet, shaking leg, taping fingers impatience twirling pen, nodding quickly, checking time sighing, looking away crossed arms, sneer, narrowed eyes, sour expression, tight 1ips jealousy hands clenched or gripping something overwhelmed wide-eyed, missing time/conversations, palms to forehead, staring off talking fast, leaning forward, nodding, raised brows, wide-eyed, eager, double handed passionate handshake smiling, nudging, teasing, poking, winking goading, giggling, laughing playful emotion & body language body language: emotion head back, parted 1ips, eyes wide or closed, flushing, quick breath/pulse, arch neck/back pleasure chin up, back straight, shoulders back, chest out, firm handshake, open/spread posture pride biting lip, pressed lips, crossed arms dragging feet, pinching bridge of nose reluctance slouched posture, holding self, hesitant, sadness quivering, crying, sobbing, shaking, tremblling tight smile, hiding hands in pockets/crossed arms, looking down/away, covering face secretiveness bury face in hands, looking down/away slumped posture, pressed lips, straight mouth, wet eyes shame eyebrows raised, mouth open, gasp, hands over mouth, freezing, stepping back/away shock dropping objects in hand (s) avoiding eye contact, looking away/down blushing, bending head, keeping distance shyness stepping away, holding self smirk, one raised eyebrow, corners of mouth twitch upwards smugnesS narrowed eyes, furrowed/creased brow, frown tight lips, pressed lips, glance sideways watchful agaze closed eyes, staring off, stroking/touching thoughtfullness neck or jewelry, pinching bridge of nose stroke face/beard, rest chin on hand theonlysaylor: A Writing Cheat Sheet: for linking actions with emotions.  As always, click for HD.
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