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Being Alone, Batman, and Books: LIBRARIAN HUMOR ISEE WHAT YOU DID THERE 0 dracophile: randomthingieshere: pheenixwright: invenblocker: pheenixwright: invenblocker: pheenixwright: invenblocker: forthefuns: follow forthefuns for more funny stuff Your honor! Please direct your attention towards the manga.As you can see there are small pieces of paper sticking out of every volume.But no such paper is sticking out of the Batman comic.The reason? The Batman book doesn’t belong to the library. The photographer put it there to take a picture. Once again making hasty assumptions, Wright?First of all, I’d like to direct the court’s attention to this particular spot, in the top right-hand corner.Notice how the words are blocking the top of the Batman book.With this in mind, how can you claim that there is “no such paper sticking out of the Batman comic”?! Say whaaaat?Well uhmLook at the size of the paper pieces, they’re all sticking pretty far out.If there was paper in the batman comic, it would be big enough to stick up over the text.And while gravity does exist, it probably won’t make the paper do a 90 degree turn and just lean horisontally left at the middle.Still grasping for straws, Wright?Hypothetically, if there were a paper there, this picture would not be able to prove its presence. I’ve taken the liberty of drawing a diagram to illustrate my point. We are faced with three possibilities. It is possible that (1) the paper was simply tucked in deeper than the others.Paper is a soft material, Wright. It’s not unreasonable for it to do a (2) 90 degree turn. Or perhaps, (3) a paper does not exist there at all. Either way, you cannot prove your client innocent without sufficient evidence.   Which, of course, is impossible thanks to the obtrusive words. I’m sorry Edgeworth.I concede that I can’t disprove theory 1But the image you submited for theory 2 is contradictory.Look at the tilt of the other papers. They clearly prove how much the paper would tilt.And theory 3 is my point! Why would the library’s book not have this piece of paper when the other library books do?While you still have thory 1, there is another contradiction.The books are not in alphabetical order, this proves that the batman comic was placed there specifically for the picture! Ack.(Perhaps I should’ve left the artistry to the forensic artist…)Now hold it right there! It doesn’t matter which direction the paper is going because it’s impossible to prove it even exists!Those theories are all the same! We do not have enough information to prove them. There could be an infinite amount of papers in there for all we know. I simply presented them only so that the court could better understand your baseless conjecture!… I suppose the order of the books do seem out of the ordinary. However, therein lies not just one possibility. Clearly, those are Japanese graphic novels, also known as “manga”. And the Batman comic book is a graphic novel, too, no?Seeing as it currently has only graphic novels in the shelf, it is possible that any other novels have simply not yet been restocked. Asserting whether or not this effect was deliberate is useless– there is no way of knowing if the photographer and the captioner are the same person, let alone their involvement in this picture.Face it Wright, you can’t prove any of these groundless accusations! Did everyone just ignore the library sticker?

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Advice, Being Alone, and Bad: charming taint man @chojuroh @danharmon do you have advice for dealing with depression 6:04 AM- Nov 28, 2017 Dan Harmon @danharmon Replying to @chojuroh For One: Admit and accept that it's happening Awareness is everything. We put ourselves under so much pressure to feel good. It's okay to feel bad. It might be something you're good at! Communicate t. DO NOT KEEP IT SECRET. Own it. Like a hat or jacket. Your feelings are real 7:08 AM Nov 28, 2017 Dan Harmon @danharmon Replying to @danharmon @chojuroh Two: try to remind yourself, over and over, that feelings are real but they aren't reality. Example you can feel like life means nothing. True feeling Important feeling. TRUE that you feel it, BUT...whether life has meaning? Not up to us. Facts and feelings: equal but different 7:12 AM - Nov 28, 2017 Dan Harmon @danharmon Replying to @chojuroh The most important thing I can say to you is please don't deal with it alone. There is an incredible, miraculous magic to pushing your feelings out. Even writing "I want to die" on a piece of paper and burning it will feel better than thinking about it alone. Output is magical 7:14 AM- Nov 28, 2017 Dan Harmon @danharmon Replying to @danharmon @chojuroh Dark thoughts will echo off the walls of your skull, they will distort and magnify. When you open your mouth (or an anonymous journal or blog or sketchpad), these thoughts go out. They'll be back but you gotta get em OUT. Vent them. Tap them. I know you don't want to but try it 7:17 AM Nov 28, 2017 Saint Dan Harmon (creator of Rick and Morty) answered to a twitter user a question about depression. These are his four tweets. I found them marvelous. Hope you like them bros! Im finding them useful as gold.

Saint Dan Harmon (creator of Rick and Morty) answered to a twitter user a question about depression. These are his four tweets. I found them...

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Advice, Cute, and Friends: RULES You are NOT to have a single girls phone number You are NOT to follow them on any social media (including Instagram Snapchat and Twitter) Epai You are NOr to hang out with Keegan (ncluding his house or anywhere in public) You are NOT to go to Honda without me vwoam wroom You are NOT to hang out with your friends more than two times a week You're NOT to look at a single girl If gitls come up to you at amy place or anytime you are toWALK away Mo is to NOT hang out us every time we hang out You are NOT to ask for head ou Saugmt You are NOT to get mad at me about a single thing ever again You're NOT to bring up TylerNoah,Deven,or Josh gver egain Ewwe * . . You are NOT allowed to drink unless I am with you 21 l am allowed to do a phone check when EVER' please sx)xxx-xx ● If we move in there are to verbe girls at our house ,uc ho、 e It we move in together your friends w RARLEY be allowed over If I catch you around giris kill you e You are NoT to ditch me for your friends · Austin does NOT CONTROL WHEN I HANG OUT WITH YOU! revo ! We are to go on a legit date once every two weeks at least Yosp IfI say jump you say "how high princess-xoxo . You are to make sure you tell me you love me oncea day at least so l know your not messing around You are to NEVER take longer than 10 mins to text me back trenchmints Filed under yikes, get a new girlfriend, doubleyikes wenamedthedogkylo A classic example of what abusive behavior in women can look like. This isn't cute or sweet or just for anyone's own good, this is controlling Young gents (and wiw and nb folks interested in ladies), if your girltfriend or prospective girlfriend presents you a list like this (especially in writing), you crumple that shit up, drop it at her feet, remind her that you are not property, and walk away. This shit isn't funny or cute when a man does it to a woman; do not tolerate it just because it's coming from a woman. leeferal I've commented on this post before but I'lI keep saying it Do not throw something like this out Keep it. Hide it somewhere safe that you'll find it again - like where you keep your tax receipts, for example. Keep it in a plastic bag and touch the actual paper as little as possible to preserve fingerprints. Maybe write the date they gave it to you on the bag itself Should the person who gave you this try anything to harm you after giving you something like this - this piece of paper is evidence of their harmful intentions. If it comes to the bringing any kind of authority into your situation without this piece of paper it could just turn into a huge 'he said/she said situation and that's not a situation you want yourself to be in. Especially if the other person is a good enough actor. #abuse #reblogging again for added commentary 169,225 notes Surprisingly solid advice for men
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Bluetooth, Bored, and Cars: . Verizon LTE 12:09 PM a houston.craigslist.org image 1 of 23 TEXAS BNL-2934 You want a car that gets the job done? You want a car that's hassle free? You want a car that literally no one will ever compliment you on? Well look no further. The 1999 Toyota Corolla Let's talk about features Bluetooth: nope Sunroof: nope Fancy wheels: nope Rear view camera: nope...but it's got a transparent rear window and you have a fucking neck that can turn Let me tell you a story. One day my Corolla started making a strange sound. I didn't give a shit and ignored it. It went away. The End You could take the engine out of this car, drop it off the Golden Gate Bridge, fish it out of the water a thousand years later, put it in the trunk of the car, fill the gas tank up with Nutella, turn the key, and this puppy would fucking start right This car will outlive you, it will outlive your children Things this car is old enough to do: Vote: yes Consent to sex: ves Rent a car: it IS a car This car's got history. It's seen some shit. People have done straight things in this car. People have done gay things ın this car. It's not going to judge you like a fucking Volkswagen would Interesting facts This car's exterior color is gray, but it's interior color is grey In the owner's manual, oil is listed as "optional." When this car was unveiled at the 1998 Detroit Auto Show, it caused all 2,000 attendees to spontaneously yawn. The resulting abrupt change in air pressure inside the building caused a partial collapse of the roof. Four people died. The event is chronicled in the documentary "Bored to Death: The Story of the 1999 Tovota Corolla" You wanna know more? Great, I had my car fill out a Facebook survey. Favorite food: spaghetti Favorite tv show: Alf Favorite band: tie between Bush and the Gin Blossoms This car is as practical as a Roth IRA. It's as middle-of-the- road as your grandpa during his last Silver Alert. It's as utilitarian as a member of a church whose scripture is based entirely on water bills When I ran the CarFax for this car, I got back a single piece of paper that said, "It's a Corolla. It's fine." Let's face the facts, this car isn't going to win any beauty contests, but neither are you. Stop lying to yourself and stop lying to your wife. This isn't the car you want, it's the car you deserve: The fucking 1999 Toyota Corolla. Whit Bayou BWa catchymemes: This man knows how to sell a car
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Cute, Friends, and Funny: RULES * You are NOT to have a single girls phone number You are NOT to follow them on any social media (including Instagram Snapchat and Twitter) Epai You are NOr to hang out with Keegan (ncluding his house or anywhere in public) You are NOT to go to Honda without me vwoam wroom You are NOT to hang out with your friends more than two times a week You're NOT to look at a single girl If gitls come up to you at amy place or anytime you are toWALK away Mo is to NOT hang out us every time we hang out You are NOT to ask for head ou Saugmt You are NOT to get mad at me about a single thing ever again You're NOT to bring up TylerNoah,Deven,or Josh gver egain Ewwe . . You are NOT allowed to drink unless I am with you 21 l am allowed to do a phone check when EVER' please sx)xxx-xx ● If we move in there are to verbe girls at our house ,uc ho、 e It we move in together your friends w RARLEY be allowed over If I catch you around giris kill you e You are NoT to ditch me for your friends · Austin does NOT CONTROL WHEN I HANG OUT WITH YOU! revo ! We are to go on a legit date once every two weeks at least Yosp IfI say jump you say "how high princess-xoxo . You are to make sure you tell me you love me oncea day at least so l know your not messing around You are to NEVER take longer than 10 mins to text me back trenchmints Filed under yikes, get a new girlfriend, doubleyikes wenamedthedogkylo A classic example of what abusive behavior in women can look like. This isn't cute or sweet or just for anyone's own good, this is controlling Young gents (and wiw and nb folks interested in ladies), if your girltfriend or prospective girlfriend presents you a list like this (especially in writing), you crumple that shit up, drop it at her feet, remind her that you are not property, and walk away. This shit isn't funny or cute when a man does it to a woman; do not tolerate it just because it's coming from a woman. leeferal I've commented on this post before but I'lI keep saying it Do not throw something like this out Keep it. Hide it somewhere safe that you'll find it again - like where you keep your tax receipts, for example. Keep it in a plastic bag and touch the actual paper as little as possible to preserve fingerprints. Maybe write the date they gave it to you on the bag itself Should the person who gave you this try anything to harm you after giving you something like this - this piece of paper is evidence of their harmful intentions. If it comes to the bringing any kind of authority into your situation without this piece of paper it could just turn into a huge 'he said/she said situation and that's not a situation you want yourself to be in. Especially if the other person is a good enough actor. #abuse #reblogging again for added commentary 169,225 notes Love is never an excuse to control someone [TW: abuse]
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Bluetooth, Bored, and Cars: . Verizon LTE 12:09 PM a houston.craigslist.org image 1 of 23 TEXAS BNL-2934 You want a car that gets the job done? You want a car that's hassle free? You want a car that literally no one will ever compliment you on? Well look no further. The 1999 Toyota Corolla Let's talk about features Bluetooth: nope Sunroof: nope Fancy wheels: nope Rear view camera: nope...but it's got a transparent rear window and you have a fucking neck that can turn Let me tell you a story. One day my Corolla started making a strange sound. I didn't give a shit and ignored it. It went away. The End You could take the engine out of this car, drop it off the Golden Gate Bridge, fish it out of the water a thousand years later, put it in the trunk of the car, fill the gas tank up with Nutella, turn the key, and this puppy would fucking start right This car will outlive you, it will outlive your children Things this car is old enough to do: Vote: yes Consent to sex: ves Rent a car: it IS a car This car's got history. It's seen some shit. People have done straight things in this car. People have done gay things ın this car. It's not going to judge you like a fucking Volkswagen would Interesting facts This car's exterior color is gray, but it's interior color is grey In the owner's manual, oil is listed as "optional." When this car was unveiled at the 1998 Detroit Auto Show, it caused all 2,000 attendees to spontaneously yawn. The resulting abrupt change in air pressure inside the building caused a partial collapse of the roof. Four people died. The event is chronicled in the documentary "Bored to Death: The Story of the 1999 Tovota Corolla" You wanna know more? Great, I had my car fill out a Facebook survey. Favorite food: spaghetti Favorite tv show: Alf Favorite band: tie between Bush and the Gin Blossoms This car is as practical as a Roth IRA. It's as middle-of-the- road as your grandpa during his last Silver Alert. It's as utilitarian as a member of a church whose scripture is based entirely on water bills When I ran the CarFax for this car, I got back a single piece of paper that said, "It's a Corolla. It's fine." Let's face the facts, this car isn't going to win any beauty contests, but neither are you. Stop lying to yourself and stop lying to your wife. This isn't the car you want, it's the car you deserve: The fucking 1999 Toyota Corolla. Whit Bayou BWa
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