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80s, Bless Up, and Clock: Meet Eddie, the Hospital Therapy Dog who is always carrying around his bookbag of toys and can always be found in the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit @DrSmashlove Reddit u/Stuffy Unicorn Part 2 (see previous post for Part 1): He’d leap out of his truck wearing overalls and construction boots and a trucker cap - not Ed Hardy but a real one, an unironic one lol. And he look like Tom Brady in the face but he burly like Tom Hardy. And he got no shirt under the overalls just manly. And my girl like “Aren’t you cold?” And in a syrupy southern drawl he say “mayam - I werked one year as longshoreman in Alasker. One tam - my toes done froze off, lost two. But I survaved. An I don’t git cold no mowar. 🤠” He reach under the steering wheel, pop the hood, walk around, flicks it open, props it up with only his arm, grab wiper fluid out of the bed of his truck which also houses a deer he just shot, opens it with his mouth, pours the fluid, replaces the cap. I’m in awe. My girl even more in awe. He grab a blanket out of his truck and wrap up my girl and he like “just makin sure yer old lady’s warm, sir 😌. Would yall lak to come to my home for some deer steaks before continuing yer journey?” And I’m like “wow what a gracious offer u know what MSNBC and CNN are wrong about y’all, rednecks are amazing people” and just then. Right then. My girl hop out the whip. I’m like “WOMAN! IT’S SNOWING?” And she like “you don’t want steak then suit yourself I’M HUNGRY. We could have stopped at Ponderosa like I asked but you said we almost home WELL SMASH WE AIN’T.” And with that she retreat to the redneck’s truck. “But baby,” I said. “We got a nice home. Like the republican Family in Strangers things 😥.” “That might be true” she say “but money can’t buy happiness.” And just like that they ride off in the sunset. People always say “I was born in the wrong era.” BIH! NOT ME! In the 80s u could lose ya girl over wiper fluid! I’m not handy but I know how a Neapolitan suit should fit in the shoulder and how to tastefully appoint a living room with Eames chairs and Mies van der Rohe bench but still make it vibe with heirloom pieces like a grandfather clock! Bish I’m aesthetic asf! I was raised with sisters! And it’s ladies who, combined with my wondrous tung and pipe game, and my brand of earnest empathy, accept my type of manliness lol! Thank you God!! Bless up! 😂😂😂

Part 2 (see previous post for Part 1): He’d leap out of his truck wearing overalls and construction boots and a trucker cap - not Ed Hardy b...

Bless Up, Cars, and Driving: Was trying to sneak a photo when this pretty girl suddenly turned around and flashed me this big smile @DrSmashlove Reddit u/erisedwild So yesterday bruv I was driving and my windshield wiper fluid ran out. Bro I done told y’all before, I don’t know about cars. I’m good at a few very specific things. Being handy ain’t one of them. So after some momentary panic, I hit the market and buy some wiper fluid. Then I consulted my rock. My confidante. My soulmate: Google 😍. First I had to know where’s the button in my car to pop the hood. Googled 🤗. Then I had to figure out where is that stick that props up the hood! Googled 😁. Finally, “where do I put wiper fluid”. Googled that but this time the google assistant wanna pop up like “Look for the large plastic cap in the lower left hand corner. Also, our algorithm indicates that You Might Like: ‘how to freshen your Nani naturally with Organic Lavender 🌷’, ‘Kylie’s New Perfectly Pregnant Eye Shadow - Reviews and On-Skin Test!’ and ‘Cosmopolitan: 17 Ways to Blow his Mind in Bed!’” And by then I’m like “U KNOW WHAT GOOGLE ENUF OF U TODAY GOODBYE ASF 😂”. And that got me thinking 🤔. What happened before Google? In the 1980s, what if I pulled over and didn’t know how to fill my wiper fluid? Simple. I’d pull over. I’d fiddle with my hood for 45 minutes while my girl stay in the car, worried for her life. Then a nice redneck man would pull over in a pickup... [to continue the story y’all gotta chune in to Part 2, bless up! 😂😂😂]

So yesterday bruv I was driving and my windshield wiper fluid ran out. Bro I done told y’all before, I don’t know about cars. I’m good at a ...

America, Be Like, and God: PRANAY SINGH, DIRECT MESSAGING ENGINEER, TWITTER Just go to a random (Trump) tweet, and just look at the followers. They'll all be like, guns God, 'Merica, like, and with the American flag and, like, the cross. Something.. erittns VISIT PROJECTVERITAS.COM/DONATE PRANAY SINGH, DIRECT MESSAGING ENGINEER, TWITTER Like, who says that? Who talks like that? It's for sure a bot. PRANAY SINGH, DIRECT MESSAGING ENGINEER, TWITTER You just delete them, but, like, the problem is there are hundreds of thousands of them, so you got to, like, write alogrithms that do it for you. jerlig JAMES O'KEEFE'S NEW BOOK AT WWW.AMERICANPRAVDABOOK.COM PRANAY SINGH,DIRECT MESSAGING ENGINEER, TWITTER You look for Trump, or America, or any of, like, five thousand, like, keywords to describe a redneck. ertas SEND YOUR TIPS TO VERITASTIPS@PROTONMAIL.COM PRANAY SINGH, DIRECT MESSAGING ENGINEER, TWITTER And then you look and you, like, parse all the messages, all like the pictures, and then you look for, like, stuff that matches, like, that stuff. SEND YOUR TIPS TO VERITASTIPS@PROTONMAIL.COM PRANAY SINGH, DIRECT MESSAGING ENGINEER, TWITTER And like if it, so you, like, you assign a value to each thing, so like Trump would be, like, .5, a picture of a gun would be like 1.5, and, like, if it comes up... lery,,., JAMES OKEEFE'S NEW BOOK AT www.AMERICANPRAVDABOOK.COM PRANAY SINGH, DIRECT MESSAGING ENGINEER, TWITTER ...the total comes up above, like, a certain value, then it's a bot. ertas VISIT PROJECTVERITAS.COM/DONATE PRANAY SINGH, DIRECT MESSAGING ENGINEER, TWITTER I would say majority of it are for Republicans, because they're all from Russia and they wanted Trump to win, so... eritas SEND YOUR ㄲPS TO VERTASTIPS@PROTONMAIL.cOM PV JOURNALIST So you would mostly just get rid of Conservatives? eritas JAMES O'KEEFE'S NEW BOOK AT WWW.AMERICANPRAVDABOOK.COM PRANAY SINGH, DIRECT MESSAGING ENGINEER, TWITTER Yeah. JAMES O'KEEFE'S NEW BOOK AT WWW.AMERICANPRAVDABOOK.COM <p><a href="http://think-squad.com/post/169593215826/twitter-employee-pranay-singh-explains-how-anyone" class="tumblr_blog">thinksquad</a>:</p> <blockquote><p>Twitter employee Pranay Singh explains how anyone tweeting about guns, God, or the American flag is a Russian bot. <br/></p><p><a class="tumblelog" href="https://tmblr.co/mJIHdLspjyb120pz69akf2Q">@quitefranklytv</a></p></blockquote> <p>My grandmother: I love Jesus <br/>Twitter: Russian hacker spotted! Take the shot!</p>

<p><a href="http://think-squad.com/post/169593215826/twitter-employee-pranay-singh-explains-how-anyone" class="tumblr_blog">thinksquad</a>:<...

Animals, Ass, and Children: Christy Cree @CrinklyCree Manny @Emann Tello Follow Follow Where did that Hurricane hit? Mostly whitefolks, yeah? Loads of white people?? Fuck all the trump supporting ass white people in Texas save all the animals from the hurricane 12:00 PM-26 Aug 2017 2:23 PM-27 Aug 2017 Juice @lmJustJuice Follow Follow @BiteSized Ty God please let that hurricane cleanse Texas of those racist ass white people. Amen. 10:53 AM 26 Aug 2017 Kinda wish it was only racist white people in lexas right about now 10:22 AM -27 Aug 2017 AM Follow Asexual God @TXN218 Follow If you are a trump supporter and live in Texas if you live in texas, i hope you die. just know that. dont care who. this is the cleanse white people wanted. it starts with them 12:00 PM-27 Aug 2017 and you were badly affected by hurricane Harvey... hmm... I'm glad you did. #HurricaneHarvey 12:01 PM-27 Aug 2017 Oliver Campbell @oliverbcampbell Followv Contrast and compare. Man saving children VS People who effectively have said they wanted those children to die <p><a href="http://siryouarebeingmocked.tumblr.com/post/164880676553/unaffiliatedpangolin-i-like-the-one-guy-who-is" class="tumblr_blog">siryouarebeingmocked</a>:</p> <blockquote><p><a href="https://unaffiliatedpangolin.tumblr.com/post/164765400732" class="tumblr_blog">unaffiliatedpangolin</a>:</p> <blockquote><figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="419" data-orig-width="745"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/348e8a9de4b8053a316ca986147bce8d/tumblr_inline_ovgxs1PJ1L1tw24n6_540.jpg" data-orig-height="419" data-orig-width="745"/></figure></blockquote> <p>I like the one guy who is too racist to know non-whites live in Texas.</p><p>Or maybe he just thinks they’d be collateral damage.</p></blockquote> <p>These dumb wastes of carbon probably think literally every single person in the state of Texas is a white redneck who wears a confederate flag on his shirt and a 10 gallon hat.</p>

<p><a href="http://siryouarebeingmocked.tumblr.com/post/164880676553/unaffiliatedpangolin-i-like-the-one-guy-who-is" class="tumblr_blog">sir...