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Responde: "TMI!" INTENSE!" "TOO EMOTIONAL!" OVER SHARING AND BP D TEXTSFROMTHEBORDERLINE.TUMBLR.COM WHAT IS IT? TEXTSFROMTHEBORDERLINE.TUMBLR.COM THE PROCESS People with BPD are emotionally intense, emotionally sensitive, and emotionally intelligent We need to feel like our thoughts, feelings, and experiences are received (and hopefully, reciprocated!) Oversharing is the process of us revealing these things in extreme detail, about every possible topic, in a effort to demonstrate the intricacies and depths of our inner processes e want you to understand + appreciate us WHY IT HAPPENS If we're (over)sharing anything with you, it means you make us feel comfortable, safe, loved+accepted. We are free to be ourselves, and we want you to know that! It's our attempt at building intimacy, trust, and care POSITIVE OUTCOMES Helps develop clear+strong communicat ion skills. Honestly conveys what's on our minod Can nurture amazingly close, fulfilling relationships. DIFFICULTIES The other person may feel overwhelmed Oversharing is not a substitute for healthy intimacy Can unintentionally disregard boundaries THINGS TO WORK ON Communicating with the appropriate time, place, and person; it's good to share, just make sure it's okay! It doesn't have to be an outburst; take your time. Be patient; give the other person time to respond SHARING +CARING HEALTHY INTIMACY Intimacy involves feelings of emotional closeness and connectedness with another person, along with the desire to share each other's innermost thoughts and feelings. There are different types of intimacy: emotional, intellectual, physical (sexual), experiential, and spiritual. Oversharing can encompass all five, but most commonly it involves emotional + intellectual ed A healthy level of intimacy is achieved when both the communicator and the receiver feel safe +comfortable to voice their inner processes, when they are respected + encouraged to do so, and when there is active listening, empathy (cognitive, at the very least) and enuine interest involved HEART TO HEART Having a discussion that is meaningful can leave you both feeling closer than ever before. You can build appreciation of each other's emotional life, interests, goals, fears, sorrows, and victories. Beautiful moments happen when they are free, spontaneous, and motivated by care instead of pressure. The exchange of energy+ perspectives can help Borderlines lessen anxiousness, fear of abandonment, feeling like they are a burden + help them learn how to communicate better OVERSHARING IS REALLY ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO COMMUNICATE EFFECTIVELY, NOT ABOUT BOTTLING YOURSELF UP AND THEN EXPLODING TEXTSFROMTHEBORDERLINE.TUMBLR.COM
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Teach them well and let them lead the way.: kamorth: nerdygirlnoodles: Okay, but seriously on the topic of straight people being so overly concerned about their children being exposed to homosexuality As some of you know, I am a makeup artist in a holistic beauty boutique in a very wealthy area of eastern New York. The week before Halloween I was offering simple costume makeup designs for both adults and children. So my last client of the evening was a 15 year old girl who came in to get her makeup done for the Halloween dance at her school. I was enjoying a conversation with both the girl and her mother when suddenly the topic of transgender came up. I got a little nervous because I have a hard time keeping my mouth shut when I hear people speaking negatively about these sorts of topics and as I mentioned, my store is in a very upscale, white conservative area Anyway, the girl starts telling us that her friend prefers to be a boy now. She says it very simply and comfortably and it made me happy to see her talk about it as if it was really no big deal Her mother says How does she even know what transgender is though? She's a little young to be making a decision like that. I really think the media is taking things too far with all this gay stuff. I'm not against it or anything, but didn't you just tell me two boys in your class are dating too? The girl said that yes, two boys she knew were dating and another boy she knew was gay also. (And she also corrected the pronouns her mother used for her friend) nl don't mind that she knows that homosexuality is," the mother said But I don't think it should be taught at such a young age. Did you know it's on Disney channel now? It took me a moment to respond, I just kept painting the girl's face until I could figure out what I wanted to say, Well," I said. "We tend to teach heterosexuality literally from the time a child is born. Most children's books and movies are even centered around a romance of some kind like a Prince and a Princess for example. There's rarely a children's movie that comes out where the main male and female character don't end up marrying each other in the end. If we don't have a problem flooding our children's minds with heterosexuality from the time they are able to sit up and watch a movie on their own, what is so wrong with showing them two boys or two girls being in love? We aren't showing them sex. We aren't showing them anything inappropriate. Since when is love inappropriate? If we show them love in all it's forms (be it gay or straight) from an early age, they will see that it's all perfectly normal and natural and maybe we can finally put homophobic the past.." The woman considered this for a second and then said "I just feel like they see it and then they start to think that they might be too And maybe they are. But isn't it better for them to know that it's okay? They aren't hurting anyone." Then the girl said. "No ones going around just thinking they are gay because they know what gay is, mom. I know what a chicken is, that doesn't mean I'm going to wake up tomorrow and start clucking." I loved this kid. I hope she does well in all of her endeavors I'm not going to wake up tomorrow and start clucking Teach them well and let them lead the way.

Teach them well and let them lead the way.

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seasonofthegeek: tomfooleryprime: tomfooleryprime: Writing is a process that often undergoes heavy edits… that includes responding to feedback.  I had no idea this post would resonate with so many people. I let my vitriol surrounding several comments I received on a recent update get to me and it spilled out into .gif form and it’s now morphed into the most widely shared thing I’ve ever posted. So many comments and tags have said things along the lines of, “This was why I quit writing” or “This is why I hate writing fanfic.” And that’s soul crushing to hear, but I can relate.  But while there are some crappy and entitled readers, there are also many brilliant ones and I’m so grateful for them. The huge response to this post made me go back and skim through the comments on my old stories, and comments like the one below are about half the reason some of those stories got finished, even if it was months later.  Comments like these are so rare, but when they do come up, they leave me staring at my computer screen, drumming my fingers on the keyboard, struggling to convey my feelings about how their words have touched my heart. These are the comments that take the longest amount of time to respond to and the ones that cause me to wear out my backspace key the fastest.  It’s easy to complain, but it’s literally just as easy to praise, so I just wanted to take a moment to recognize all those dear and dedicated readers who have propped me up when I wanted to quit. Readers like you are why I keep writing, and why I even feel honored to do it on rare occasion.  And fellow writers, keep your heads up if you can. :)  I know I reblogged this before with the first part but the added content is perfect so I’m reblogging again. To those who have left me these kind of comments, even if I wasn’t mentally able to respond at the time, please know how much they mean to me. I have them saved so I can go back and read them when I’m down. Thank you for sticking around. : Anonymous reader who has never commented before I loved this update, but is it too much to ask that you make the chapters longer? Also, it's been so long since your last update that I had to go back and re-read the previous chapter just to know what was going on. It would be great if you could give us more regular updates so we don't get confused. Thanks Comment as Every tired fanfic author (Plain text with limited HTML 4300 characters left Comment Cancel seasonofthegeek: tomfooleryprime: tomfooleryprime: Writing is a process that often undergoes heavy edits… that includes responding to feedback.  I had no idea this post would resonate with so many people. I let my vitriol surrounding several comments I received on a recent update get to me and it spilled out into .gif form and it’s now morphed into the most widely shared thing I’ve ever posted. So many comments and tags have said things along the lines of, “This was why I quit writing” or “This is why I hate writing fanfic.” And that’s soul crushing to hear, but I can relate.  But while there are some crappy and entitled readers, there are also many brilliant ones and I’m so grateful for them. The huge response to this post made me go back and skim through the comments on my old stories, and comments like the one below are about half the reason some of those stories got finished, even if it was months later.  Comments like these are so rare, but when they do come up, they leave me staring at my computer screen, drumming my fingers on the keyboard, struggling to convey my feelings about how their words have touched my heart. These are the comments that take the longest amount of time to respond to and the ones that cause me to wear out my backspace key the fastest.  It’s easy to complain, but it’s literally just as easy to praise, so I just wanted to take a moment to recognize all those dear and dedicated readers who have propped me up when I wanted to quit. Readers like you are why I keep writing, and why I even feel honored to do it on rare occasion.  And fellow writers, keep your heads up if you can. :)  I know I reblogged this before with the first part but the added content is perfect so I’m reblogging again. To those who have left me these kind of comments, even if I wasn’t mentally able to respond at the time, please know how much they mean to me. I have them saved so I can go back and read them when I’m down. Thank you for sticking around.
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owloftheforest: pleatedjeans: via This is what society needs, less stigma around gay people trying to find what everyone else does. For people who aren’t lgbtq to understand that we are just trying and if you aren’t attracted to us don’t take it offensively or weirdly and just politely say no. I wish I had the courage to give guys my number in public. : I was at my cousins wedding reception and had just sat down from dancing. It was nearing the end of the night at this time so I was pretty secluded from everyone. A man walked up to me who I hadn't seen before and nervously said "what's your name?" I replied, "Chad, what's yours?" He said "Shane, I just wanted to let you know that I have noticed you all night. I wanted to leave this with you before I left." He handed me a piece of paper and quickly walked out. It was his number. Without knowing if I was straight or not he had built up the guts to put himself out there. I thought it was extremely brave and I know it's something I wouldn't be able to do. I'm sharing this to remind everyone to live their lives without regrets. Almost all of my regrets come from the things I didn't do, not the things I did. I will be living my life more like this man and I suggest you all do as well. Good night. o Verizon 12:21 AM 〈Messages Wedding Guy Details iMessage Yesterday 11:51 PM Hey this is Chad from the wedding. I just wanted to let you know that I actually have a girlfriend but I thought it was really brave what you did I. Keep it up I hope you're a good year! Hey Chad. I appreciate you responding, man. It took me forever to pony up the guts to do it. I really never thought that you would respond because l was so awkward the entire time . Your gf is a lucky gal! Thanks a lot! Keep it up its so much better to live your life without the regrets of not doing those types of things even if they're scary at the time. I wish you the best and know you'll find someone soon. Havea great week! Delivered O iMessage 0 owloftheforest: pleatedjeans: via This is what society needs, less stigma around gay people trying to find what everyone else does. For people who aren’t lgbtq to understand that we are just trying and if you aren’t attracted to us don’t take it offensively or weirdly and just politely say no. I wish I had the courage to give guys my number in public.

owloftheforest: pleatedjeans: via This is what society needs, less stigma around gay people trying to find what everyone else does. Fo...

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deuslock: but-call-me-kat: Sorry to break the news, but you did not report the person behind that blog. Instead, you reported me. And I am still suffering the consequences. I did not run that blog. Yes, they used my image. All my pictures from Facebook and Instagram, my statuses, even the captions. And then interspersed them with animal abuse images, fantasies about beastiality, other fucking disgusting sentiments. You people found my Facebook, where I listed my wildlife rescue group. You didn’t think, for a moment, that it was odd that none of these abuse fantasies appeared on Facebook. A girl who was apparently willing to put her face, her location, the names of her family her local fucking vet clinic on her zoophilic Tumblr page, strangely had none of these thoughts on a just-as-public Facebook page. Not one single person thought, “This is a bit odd, maybe I should reach out to this person just to confirm that it’s them.” You people, high on some fantastical idea of justice, called the authorities. And I did not even know about the existence of the blog until the RSPCA showed up on my doorstep one night. THEY, thankfully, had the sense to believe me. As soon as they showed me the page and I broke down in tears, they got the idea. So they told me to go to the police. The police palmed me off to ACORN (a cybercrime body) who dismissed the case because “nobody in the images was under the age of 18.” Meanwhile, Tumblr had taken the page down, only for it to resurface again last year. I then pursued a civil case. Emailed lawyers in my local city. They advised me only to take it to Tumblr, who shut down the page a second time. No further action was taken. I never received another call from wildlife rescue because I was unable to prove that I did not run this disgusting blog. Wildlife is my biggest passion in the world and I may never work in that industry until I can clear my name. So I messaged this page - report-a-predator. They told me to prove it - fair enough. So I sent them EVERYTHING. The screenshots, my emails to ACORN and SAPOL and Tumblr and the lawyers. They did not respond. I emailed them again, begging them to clear my name. They did not respond. I am furious. I am fucking enraged that this post even still exists on their page, because the actions of this so-called “justice group” has directly impacted the life of an innocent person and they will do nothing to acknowledge it. Not even respond to a simple email. Not even take down the incriminating post. I know my blog is tiny, I know nobody follows it, I know this will probably never be seen. But I am not going to be silent. If you’re ever caught up in a whirlwind of pseudo-justice, maybe check the facts first. Oh, look, another example of callous culture ruining people’s fucking lives. : report-a-predator Anonymous asked crazy-possum-lady is a zoophilia and animal rapist who lives in australia. It's even worse because she works for an animal rescue and has pets. You can find her blog by googling it but you cannnot find it you use the blog search on tumblr. report-a-predator answered Thank You!!l Okay guys Alright so if you guys can report them to the Australian authorities.- mod sparks deuslock: but-call-me-kat: Sorry to break the news, but you did not report the person behind that blog. Instead, you reported me. And I am still suffering the consequences. I did not run that blog. Yes, they used my image. All my pictures from Facebook and Instagram, my statuses, even the captions. And then interspersed them with animal abuse images, fantasies about beastiality, other fucking disgusting sentiments. You people found my Facebook, where I listed my wildlife rescue group. You didn’t think, for a moment, that it was odd that none of these abuse fantasies appeared on Facebook. A girl who was apparently willing to put her face, her location, the names of her family her local fucking vet clinic on her zoophilic Tumblr page, strangely had none of these thoughts on a just-as-public Facebook page. Not one single person thought, “This is a bit odd, maybe I should reach out to this person just to confirm that it’s them.” You people, high on some fantastical idea of justice, called the authorities. And I did not even know about the existence of the blog until the RSPCA showed up on my doorstep one night. THEY, thankfully, had the sense to believe me. As soon as they showed me the page and I broke down in tears, they got the idea. So they told me to go to the police. The police palmed me off to ACORN (a cybercrime body) who dismissed the case because “nobody in the images was under the age of 18.” Meanwhile, Tumblr had taken the page down, only for it to resurface again last year. I then pursued a civil case. Emailed lawyers in my local city. They advised me only to take it to Tumblr, who shut down the page a second time. No further action was taken. I never received another call from wildlife rescue because I was unable to prove that I did not run this disgusting blog. Wildlife is my biggest passion in the world and I may never work in that industry until I can clear my name. So I messaged this page - report-a-predator. They told me to prove it - fair enough. So I sent them EVERYTHING. The screenshots, my emails to ACORN and SAPOL and Tumblr and the lawyers. They did not respond. I emailed them again, begging them to clear my name. They did not respond. I am furious. I am fucking enraged that this post even still exists on their page, because the actions of this so-called “justice group” has directly impacted the life of an innocent person and they will do nothing to acknowledge it. Not even respond to a simple email. Not even take down the incriminating post. I know my blog is tiny, I know nobody follows it, I know this will probably never be seen. But I am not going to be silent. If you’re ever caught up in a whirlwind of pseudo-justice, maybe check the facts first. Oh, look, another example of callous culture ruining people’s fucking lives.
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