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Jesus, Satan, and Jesus Christ: Satan rushes to the aid of Jesus Christ, a man being tortured by the townsfolk (circa 33 AD)

Satan rushes to the aid of Jesus Christ, a man being tortured by the townsfolk (circa 33 AD)

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Alive, Bitch, and Chill: YOU MATCHED WITH ON 24/10/18 Important question: when you do finger guns, do you stick up both pointer and middle finger or just pointer? Wed, 24 Oct, 8:20 am Both? Haha Wed, 24 Oct, 9:25 pm What about sounds? What do you do when you shoot? Pew pew? Haha Say we had a duel and I whipped out both hands, would that be too far? Hmm...you better be prepared for when i wip out two hands pew pew sounds* "I dodgeroll to the nearest table flipping it in one swift motion for cover * flips table in slow motion puts finger guns to head* Are you feelin lucky...punk? sweat beads down my forehead* Ok, ok, you got me "you feel a finger poke the back of your head* You hear a somewhat familiar Boston accent say "Do you?" You turn around and to your surprise you see Danny Devito standing behind you. He's on my side gulp *slowly lowers fingers guns Chill..violence is NOT the answer, okay?. jumps up and shoots Danny in the shoulder* *you feel a finger gun on your back, you slowly turn to see Clint Eastwood behind you *the cold finger on my back sends a shiver down my spine* "He starts whistling This is the End by The Doors, great song. "This is how I wish to go out"I say calmly, accepting my fate Are you are fucking writer? And then boom I open my eyes to see that I am still alive and well. Not Clint However I look at you in shock as you lower your finger gun. Clint collapses to the ground "You're welcome" you say I wish Imao " wait, why did i shoot him?.."i ask, very confused... "You fall to the ground, you're about to faint I rush over to you to catch you Succeeding You go cold then all of a sudden a shadow rushes over you Danny Devito's possession got it's revenge* We both wave the white flag and go grab a couple of drinks laughing about what just took place " cheers", i say, holding my basic white bitch drink over to yours (vodka soda) The first conversation between myself and my (now) girlfriend
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Bad, Dank, and Family: Validating your wife's feelings. You don't have to understand the exact feelings in play to show solidarity. Below are some helpful phrases that may help you better express YOUR feelings about her feelings. She just wants to know that you care. She needs space to process what she's feeling before she is ready to move on to problem solving and logic. Give her this space and show your support by employing a response from below 1. An apology (one or more of these may apply, but likely only one will be necessary) "I'm sorry I hurt your feelings'" "That sounds like it sucks. I'm sorry" "I'm sorry I wasn't listening" "l'm sorry I made you feel that way" 2. A follow up (to show how much you care utilize one or more of the following that apply) "I didn't know that [action or statement] would make you feel [bad thing], you are [good thing] to me "Can you think of anything that would make you feel better?" "I hate that I made you feel this way." "I hope you know I would never do that on purpose" "I wish I knew how to make you feel better" "I'm not sure what I can do to make you feel better, but l'd like to try "I hate that my family or friend made you feel that way" "I hear what you are saying. It's hard for me to feel like I can't fix it" "I hope you know you are [good thing]. I never want you to feel [bad thing]" "This is hard for me too" "I don't quite understand what's going on. Can you explain it again or tell me how I can help?" "You don't need to yell. I'm listening, and I hope you'll listen to me next" "I really want to fix this, but you're going to have to help me understand what's wrong" "I didn't know you were this upset" "I can see that you're upset, but I don't understand why" "l don't know what to say" "Let's try to avoid another misunderstanding like this" "l see why you're feeling that way Would you like a glass of wine?" 3. She might also have some things to apologize for. Once you have apologized kindly using two or three follow up statements you can try to start problem solving. Proceed with caution. It's important that you don't rush from apologizing to criticizing Editor's note: this guide is intended to help turn your feelings into words that help a situation Please to do not simply read a response from this guide. You should still mean what you are saying My friend made her husband an apology cheat sheet (posted with permission). by jinx2369 MORE MEMES

My friend made her husband an apology cheat sheet (posted with permission). by jinx2369 MORE MEMES

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America, Children, and Crazy: Adam Serwer @AdamSerwer Flowv The President just issued a thinly veiled physical threat to a sitting mem ber of Congress Donald J. Trump GrealDonaldTrump Follow Congresswoman Maxine Waters, an extraordinarily low IQ person, has become, together with Nancy Pelosi, the Face of the Democrat Party. She has just called for harm to supporters, of which there are many, of the Make America Great Again movement. Be careful what you wish for Max! 12:11 PM-25 Jun 2018 1,771 Retweets 4,719 Likes 1.1K ta 1.8 7 0:15 AM 25 Jun 2018 Adam Serwer Follow Two months ago, a Trump supporter pled guilty for threatening to kill Waters over her criticism of the president. San Pedro Man Pleads Guilty to Threatening to Kill Rep. Maxine Wat. A 45-year-old San Pedro man is expected to plead guilty Monday to threatening to kill Los Angeles Democratic Rep. Maxine Waters over her o... nbclosangeles.com 0:19 AM 25 Jun 2018 Adam Serwer @AdamSerwer Follow Also, it is false that Waters called for "harm" to "supporters." Here's her statement, and the accompanying video. She doesn't mention Trump supporters, she's referring to cabinet members, and she's talking about denying them service, not assaulting them. youtube.com/watch?v--1Fu3g... WATERS: Let's make sure we show up wherever we have to show up, and if you see anybody from that cabinet in a restaurant, in a department store, at a gasoline station, you get out and you create a crowd, and you push back on them, and you tell them they're not welcome anymore, anywhere, we've got to get the children connected to their parents, their children are suffering 10:39 AM- 25 Jun 2018 Bree Newsome @BreeNewsome Follow Let's see how quickly the pundit class rushes to defend Maxine Waters as a "wife and mother" like they do for Sarah Sanders because y'all love to insist Black women aren't treated any differently from other women Adam Serwer @AdamSerwer The President just issued a thinly veiled physical threat to a sitting member of Congress Show this thread 10:22 AM 25 Jun 2018 thyestean-feast: sauvamente: questionall: niggazinmoscow: this ALL OF THIS!!! So much truth! If Maxine Waters ends up dead follow this back because it’s a fucking trail that man is crazy The Left white silence on this is not astounding. They were all for reclaiming my time, but as soon as she says some real shit it’s “you’re too aggressive. You’re so angry”
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Assassination, John F. Kennedy, and Husband: FLOTUS Jackie Kennedy rushes to the aid of her husband, President John F. Kennedy, moments after his assassination. (November 22, 1963 - colourized)

FLOTUS Jackie Kennedy rushes to the aid of her husband, President John F. Kennedy, moments after his assassination. (November 22, 1963 - col...

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Ass, Friends, and Mood: vintar i used to get self-conscious over the smallest things but friends let me tell you that today I had to smuggle a furious 8ft python onto the bus during the school rush and not a singie person noticed. not one. if people don't care enough to notice a shopping bag writhing and seething with barely- contained reptilian hatred then i promise you that no-one will pay any attention to that blemish you're fretting about or how you've done your hair Question, why are you bringing a 8 ft python into a public bus? You know that this reptile can kill anyone inside there? buddy she's a snake not a flying death tentacle snakes are not evil killers out for blood, and length doesnt mean lethality! my biggest guy is 11 ft-ifi have him around my neck, both his face and his tail touch the floor- and even his species struggles to take down anything bigger than a smal-to- medium dog the worst damage that my 8fter is capable of is when she decides to do an impression of ab makes my arm go a bit purpie, and even that's just when i humour her dreams of being big and scary and let her squeeze her hardest before i unwind her like a bratty garden hose ood- pressure cuff and as long as you're not some sort of magical tumbiring rat, you're fine Okay, I gotta ask... 1. Why was she angry? 2. Where were you taking her on the bus? is there a leash-free snake park where you live? I need to know. 1. she's a cranky ass in general, but her mood was absolutely not improved by eating a bit of a snake hook, getting stuffed in a sack, experiencing an hour of adelaide 's finest public transport, and having a vet jam a tube into her stomach 2. i think all of australia is technically a leash-free snake park tbh I am so glad there was follow up on this post explaining why the snake was on the bus!! bratty garden hose"I'm dying All of Australia is a leash-free snake park. buddy she's a snake not a flying death tentacle " Learning this took place in Australia really makes it all make much more sense. A positivity post featuring a very angry snake
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Android, Bored, and Facebook: 4:21 PM Dashboard preferences Best stuff first Short on time? This switch puts stuff you'll like at the top of your dash. thecatwhocantdance: this-artist-rushes-in: chandra-nalaar: yahenni: dr-algernop: illogical-bullshit: arielries: startrekgifs: preoccupiedpepper: staff: Here it is: Best stuff first Extremely handy if you follow a lot of people and hate missing anything good.  Best Stuff First moves the best stuff on your dashboard—mhm!—right up to the top.  It’s rolling out this week on iOS and Android, and comes with this Help Center article.   Thanks! ✌️ Head’s up folks! Tumblr decided to shit the bed and go non-chronological! This bullshit is being rolled out this week and it’s going to be default! This is dangerous and manipulative. The main reasons for these “algorithms” that Instagram, Facebook and Twitter have rolled out are manipulating what people see. Content they want you to see gets pushed to the top, anything threatening to their interests gets quietly tossed to the bottom so you’ll be too tired or bored to see it. I can see this seriously messing with the livelihood of artists, so please reblog if you can! This adds a whole new level to being shadowbanned. Now you can just be shadow-shoved-to-the-bottom and no one will ever see your posts again. Ngl I see this as a way Staff will deal with users they find ~problematic~. Remember that time Facebook did the exact same thing, then conducted illegal psychosocial experiments on it’s users by tampering with their activity feeds to make depressing posts, happy posts, etc. show up more often to manipulate the emotional states of their users? It’s probably in your best interest to disable this. Just fyi. This had been turned on for me and I didn’t know until I saw this post. It’s under General Settings-Dashboard on your mobile settings. hey you know that feature everyone constantly complains about on facebook and twitter? why dont we put it here too Not art for once but something everyone should be aware of!!! I had this activated in my app and didn’t know. I checked my phone again earlier today and found this feature was finally there for me to turn off and holy shit you wouldn’t believe how much stuff just straight up hadn’t been showing up on my dash was suddenly able to be seen.
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