Scissor
Scissor

Scissor

Costume Fail
Costume Fail

Costume Fail

wrapping paper
 wrapping paper

wrapping paper

what i imagine
 what i imagine

what i imagine

gliding
 gliding

gliding

ifs
ifs

ifs

yours
yours

yours

go to
go to

go to

playful
playful

playful

played
played

played

๐Ÿ”ฅ Popular | Latest

Memes, ๐Ÿค–, and Cty: CTI ) EP CC Remember to use clean scissors. Follow @9gag @9gagmobile 9gag bandaid (cr: ponzuyo | Twitter) lifehack lifechanging wound

Remember to use clean scissors. Follow @9gag @9gagmobile 9gag bandaid (cr: ponzuyo | Twitter) lifehack lifechanging wound

Be Like, Bless Up, and Fresh: what did we do to deserve dogs Drsmashlove Melanie Wang @MelanieWang2 when I'm sad my dog goes outside and tries to bring me things. today she brought me a pine Cone Ladies. If u with a man. Let's call him David. David look like he got potential. Nice personality. Nice disposition. Couple two three bucks in his bucket. Hair cut. Basically hygienic. Good teeth. Kind to waiters. U feel me? Not a psychopathic serial killer who look like he might get angry one day and feed u into a meat grinder. But he ain't hitting all your spots in bed? Work with David. Vocalize. "That's not my clit." "Baby could u clip your nails and file them next time before u insert them Edward scissors hands in my delicate vessel of life." "U can pull my hair but u not suppose to pull it out of the root so it look like I suffer from pattern baldness." U feel me? Vocalize. Sometimes u gon be with a Casanova who know all your spots. Guess what he know every girl's spots because he been with every girl ๐Ÿ™ƒ. He was with another girl this morning. He gon be with another girl right after u leave like literally he gon call his midnight girl who he don't even know her name he just got her in his phone as "Midnight Throatzilla the Demon Child." U feel me? Nah but David ain't Casanova. David is a regular dude who got potential to be your Mr. Right. All David need is a lil coaching. Imma keep it one hundred. When I was a fresh faced young man out here tryina get it I went out with a girl named Eden. Eden was a teacher so u already know she was absolutely a pinnacle freak. She once said (and I quote): "there is nothing better than being at a party and someone has Coke in the bathroom. I mean. That's like Christmas coming early" ๐ŸŽ…๐Ÿ”ซ. Anyway at the end of the first date I kiss her and I'm like "ha. I'm an amazing kisser. Let me do my lil thang right quick." Nah. Hell nah. She's just like "stop. Seriously stop. You're not kissing. You're eating my face. My face is not a piece of chicken. Kiss my lips. Kiss around my lips. Start gentle. Then go harder. Ok? Do it and I'll tell u how you did." She took it right back to her first grade class on me. Eden knew, bruh. She knew that every man ain't perfect but he could get damn close if he got potential. Be like Eden. Speak up. Mold him a lil bit. It will pay dividends. Ya get me! Bless up ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚