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readerjohn: peaceheather: thequeensphinx: roll–initiative: meme-xirl-wonder: luidilovins: asundergrowth: lovelyloseruniverse: asundergrowth: vocifersaurus: abrakafcukyou: bitterfucked: breastforce: how to tell if your worldbuilding is Bad i didn’t wanna reblog this just cos it doesn’t deserve to get seen but: a) dwarves don’t share the gender binary that humans use, heterosexual versus homosexual is meaningless to them b) gnomes have such a predilection towards illusions that gender is primarily based on presentation. because of consistent interaction with humans, they tend towards visually hetero relationships just for sake of public ease but gnomes all know gender is an ilusion c) halflings are super community oriented. they would be incredibly accepting of homosexuality because frowning on someone for liking a particular gender is counter to community building d) goblins don’t believe in sexuality they believe in food e) orcs are 100% butch lesbians and bears. they are totally gay with a small side of being attracted to muscles and soft hairy bellies “but if they’re all gay how do they reproduce?” magic rituals motherfucker it’s a fantasy world f) tieflings never have a predominant culture and tend to ascribe to human values, with a bit of “i’m already an outcast, so anything goes”. i don’t wanna say tieflings are super gay just because there is a lot of baggage that comes with the evil demon race being super gay but tieflings are super gay g) dragonborn carry a lot of draconic values, one of the most notable being vanity. if a dragonbron is gay, they will literally be the embodiment of that “move, i’m gay” video. taboo my ass just try to stop that dragonborn, they’ll show you the meaning of flaming bottom line here is really that if you thought the dnd races were straight you were so wrong. i am going to find you and rub my gay ass on your player’s handbook bury me with this post it’s perfect Goblins don’t believe in sexuality they believe in food. Consider: Orcs are like bats. 95% of them are homosexual because the few orcs that ARE straight produce children at insane rates. Because of this, adoption is considered the norm in Orc society. Orcs are unconcerned with lineage and do not take a family name, but rather a clan or tribe name. I like this Straight orcs never stop fucking and its a problem Are you saying that 95% of bats are gay? You can’t argue with the facts. “Oh yeah, those two are Gnarla and Lorg, they are the Fuckers™” Holy shit imma show this to my dm and he is just gonna die laughing The fuckers @godkingsanointed   @rapid-artwork: readerjohn: peaceheather: thequeensphinx: roll–initiative: meme-xirl-wonder: luidilovins: asundergrowth: lovelyloseruniverse: asundergrowth: vocifersaurus: abrakafcukyou: bitterfucked: breastforce: how to tell if your worldbuilding is Bad i didn’t wanna reblog this just cos it doesn’t deserve to get seen but: a) dwarves don’t share the gender binary that humans use, heterosexual versus homosexual is meaningless to them b) gnomes have such a predilection towards illusions that gender is primarily based on presentation. because of consistent interaction with humans, they tend towards visually hetero relationships just for sake of public ease but gnomes all know gender is an ilusion c) halflings are super community oriented. they would be incredibly accepting of homosexuality because frowning on someone for liking a particular gender is counter to community building d) goblins don’t believe in sexuality they believe in food e) orcs are 100% butch lesbians and bears. they are totally gay with a small side of being attracted to muscles and soft hairy bellies “but if they’re all gay how do they reproduce?” magic rituals motherfucker it’s a fantasy world f) tieflings never have a predominant culture and tend to ascribe to human values, with a bit of “i’m already an outcast, so anything goes”. i don’t wanna say tieflings are super gay just because there is a lot of baggage that comes with the evil demon race being super gay but tieflings are super gay g) dragonborn carry a lot of draconic values, one of the most notable being vanity. if a dragonbron is gay, they will literally be the embodiment of that “move, i’m gay” video. taboo my ass just try to stop that dragonborn, they’ll show you the meaning of flaming bottom line here is really that if you thought the dnd races were straight you were so wrong. i am going to find you and rub my gay ass on your player’s handbook bury me with this post it’s perfect Goblins don’t believe in sexuality they believe in food. Consider: Orcs are like bats. 95% of them are homosexual because the few orcs that ARE straight produce children at insane rates. Because of this, adoption is considered the norm in Orc society. Orcs are unconcerned with lineage and do not take a family name, but rather a clan or tribe name. I like this Straight orcs never stop fucking and its a problem Are you saying that 95% of bats are gay? You can’t argue with the facts. “Oh yeah, those two are Gnarla and Lorg, they are the Fuckers™” Holy shit imma show this to my dm and he is just gonna die laughing The fuckers @godkingsanointed   @rapid-artwork
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I thought I’d peaked before, but I was so, so wrong… This clearly is the best I’ll ever manage. I can’t ever hope to match it: 12:36 o s O NO Sl A 42% 4 < Jane Ari Pralle Chat Yeter 2u You iked Jane's phota Yetering onu I can't resist a good bad Christmas sweater What should your custom poem be about Ooh surprise me But that could be copy pasted and that's no tun Gimme something suuuuper specific And then I need a format choice toa, between Dr. Seuss poem, Shakespearean sonnet, or something custom Yesterty For the spirit of things, that same Christmas sweater. I think sonnet or Seuss style would be Interesting Sommet, final answer Sonnet Veetery 0PM I enjoy al these amusingly specitic soloctionsl Holiday sweaters. are my shit. Sit tight| Engaging ryicality Should Rudolph pause before a red so fine? Esch every handmade brickline laid with care No sweater on this earth match'd her desigrn, Doff polyester now for wool so fair. Nostalgic evenings end by fire's dance, Unending chest nuts roasting on the flame Doth time unerringly from thus advance? Enmesh fair memries in your fabric's frame. Such understated beauty holds the wreath, Just lookl espy her face for beauty more. And yonder ribbons dance and light bequeath, No trash pullover could so highly soar Each hearth lacks warmth in absence of such heart. Ere onto spring l'd never be apart. Tuday AM That was very well thought out, I really, really liked it Trsday M Haha thankall But just wait until you read the first ietter of each ine in the sonnet Taday SAM Dammit You're too clever Ch if anly it ended there. See the message I sent after your requesta, the one about the amusingly specific selections? Resd the first letter of each word in that sentence Tulay aAM Did not see that one coming Taday AM Oh, it only gets worse. The message after that one, starting with "holiday sweaters". Write down the first letter of each word, but than read it backwards Any other coded messages? Keeps on going fm afraid Check out the sonnet again. Read the first letter of the "second" word in each line Fedau AM Well played (at this point she guessed what's ahead and also did this one) I got that one Unsurprisingly there's also a secret message it you read the first letter of the third word in each ine Probably for good measure you could olso read the first letter of every message i sent "after the sonnet Th SENDNODES NE Sthash especttuy the hmanher Degr I thought I’d peaked before, but I was so, so wrong… This clearly is the best I’ll ever manage. I can’t ever hope to match it
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keyhollow: rametarin: someoneintheshadow456: vikkidc: rv-nn: el-kabongjr: manwiththesquidhat: kichizone: oswinstark: wilwheaton: kittydoom: jimmyfury: pumpkinskull: interruptingpanda: myotpisgay: ninjaboots: gayyourlifemustbe: cloakstone69: president-vanellope: wake up america this is to educate my non-American followers. This really is how the US sees itself. (and yes, 95% of the time, Florida = WHAT?!) In Florida the more North you go, the more “South” you get  In Florida the central part pretends to be the south, the western part pretends to be the northeast and the south pretends to be the west I’m not even kidding you  … Please tell me you guys are kidding.   Florida is like it’s own country I swear I’m from Florida and I can confirm this. Also, South Florida is basically Miami and alligators. oh, i always assumed florida was part of The South? north florida is yes. The rest is not. I’m from Florida, and grew up in SC/NC. Can confirm all true. 👍 Um. This is so wrong. You’re forgetting the part where California sees itself as its own entity. We do not want to be grouped in with everyone else, thanks. clearly none of you have ever met someone from texas I’m from Texas and I “Yee-Haw” this message ^ LMFAO America truly is a bunch of countries in a trench coat Bitch please at least your “countries in a trench coat” speak the same language. Sorta. The number of Spanish-only speakers is goin’ up up up. Which needs to change or shits gonna get fucky real quick, especially in school system standardized testing bullshit ugh You say that as if shit hasn’t been fucky for decades : The US SHOULD be divided like this Nos Norther Suthwes* Southeost But its act э11ym like this: uest South Whot keyhollow: rametarin: someoneintheshadow456: vikkidc: rv-nn: el-kabongjr: manwiththesquidhat: kichizone: oswinstark: wilwheaton: kittydoom: jimmyfury: pumpkinskull: interruptingpanda: myotpisgay: ninjaboots: gayyourlifemustbe: cloakstone69: president-vanellope: wake up america this is to educate my non-American followers. This really is how the US sees itself. (and yes, 95% of the time, Florida = WHAT?!) In Florida the more North you go, the more “South” you get  In Florida the central part pretends to be the south, the western part pretends to be the northeast and the south pretends to be the west I’m not even kidding you  … Please tell me you guys are kidding.   Florida is like it’s own country I swear I’m from Florida and I can confirm this. Also, South Florida is basically Miami and alligators. oh, i always assumed florida was part of The South? north florida is yes. The rest is not. I’m from Florida, and grew up in SC/NC. Can confirm all true. 👍 Um. This is so wrong. You’re forgetting the part where California sees itself as its own entity. We do not want to be grouped in with everyone else, thanks. clearly none of you have ever met someone from texas I’m from Texas and I “Yee-Haw” this message ^ LMFAO America truly is a bunch of countries in a trench coat Bitch please at least your “countries in a trench coat” speak the same language. Sorta. The number of Spanish-only speakers is goin’ up up up. Which needs to change or shits gonna get fucky real quick, especially in school system standardized testing bullshit ugh You say that as if shit hasn’t been fucky for decades 
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AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE OUI OUI OUI: penfairy Throwback to the time my poor German teacher had to explain the concept of formal and informal pronouns to a class full of Australians and everyone was scandalised and loudly complained "why can't I treat everyone the same?" " don't want to be a Sie!" "but being friendly is respectful! "wouldn't using du' just show I like them?" until one guy conceded "I suppose maybe l'd use Sie with someone like the prime minister, if he weren't such a cunt" and my teacher ended up with her head in her hands saying "you are all banned from using du until I can trust you Cdeflare God help Japanese teachers in Australia. languageoclock if this isnt an accurate representation of australia idk what is derinthemadscientist Australia's reverse-formality respect culture is fascinating. We don't even really think about it until we try to communicate or learn about another culture and the rules that are pretty standard for most of the world just feel so wrong. I went to America this one time and I kept automatically thinking that strangers using 'sir' and 'ma'am' were sassing me. Australians could not be trusted with a language with ingrained tiers of formal address. The most formal forms would immediately become synonyms for 'go fuck yourself and if you weren't using the most informal version possible within three sentences of meeting someone they'd take it to mean you hated them. hollowedskin 100% true. the difference between "scuse me" and "excuse me" is a fistfight Source: penfairy Stay awake at FUNSubstance.com AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE OUI OUI OUI
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awesomesthesia: Meet Frank The Turtle: Everyone meet Frank. Frank is 40b snapping turtle that wandered into a community where he did not belong. Frank needed to be escorted back to his local pond where he couldnt go all snappity snap on anyone (or oute puppies) so my friend and I jumped into action. Within about 2 minutes it was prety apparent that Frank is a gigantic king a""hole Here we see Frank gettin all high and mighty trying to run the f"k away from us and get to the nearest basket of puppies that he could then chompity chomp simply because he is a giant t"k. Let me tell you something Frank, your dreams of being a Godzlla like terror on humanity are f"king over. You picked the wrong towrn Frank, you picked the wrong king town. Not äke Frank was gonna make it easy on me though. I swear to god this bastard just about hissed and shit everywhere betore we got him to calm the f'k down Jesus Frank Frank then realized he was ked so instead of cooperating and getting a free ride back to his pond OH NO. Frank here decides he is five f"king years old and he sits thef"K down and goes limp Honestly Frank grow the fk up. You think ather turtles are acting like this at your age Frank, no. Frank here probably thought at this point we we're unqualified to deal with a shelled prehistoric asswipe but his ass was wrong. So wrong WE F KING LASSO'D THE SH.T OUTTA YOU FRANK Needless to say Frank was pretty f"king upset about the whole ordeal and bitched the entre ten minute walk back to Casa De Frank and just when 1 thought my life was gonna got just a ittle bit easier, Frank goes and torpedo sholgun pisses all over my toot Fk you Frank. Thats low even for you, you pancake sheled dickweed Long story short we got Frank back home and saved the entire town. Frank was not hurt, and we treated the whole situation with care BECAUSE TM A BIGGER MORE MATURE PERSON THAN YOU FRANK YOU SON OF A B'TCH THE META PICTURE awesomesthesia: Meet Frank The Turtle
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awesomesthesia: Meet Frank The Turtle: Everyone meet Frank. Frank is 40b snapping turtle that wandered into a community where he did not belong. Frank needed to be escorted back to his local pond where he couldnt go all snappity snap on anyone (or oute puppies) so my friend and I jumped into action. Within about 2 minutes it was prety apparent that Frank is a gigantic king a""hole Here we see Frank gettin all high and mighty trying to run the f"k away from us and get to the nearest basket of puppies that he could then chompity chomp simply because he is a giant t"k. Let me tell you something Frank, your dreams of being a Godzlla like terror on humanity are f"king over. You picked the wrong towrn Frank, you picked the wrong king town. Not äke Frank was gonna make it easy on me though. I swear to god this bastard just about hissed and shit everywhere betore we got him to calm the f'k down Jesus Frank Frank then realized he was ked so instead of cooperating and getting a free ride back to his pond OH NO. Frank here decides he is five f"king years old and he sits thef"K down and goes limp Honestly Frank grow the fk up. You think ather turtles are acting like this at your age Frank, no. Frank here probably thought at this point we we're unqualified to deal with a shelled prehistoric asswipe but his ass was wrong. So wrong WE F KING LASSO'D THE SH.T OUTTA YOU FRANK Needless to say Frank was pretty f"king upset about the whole ordeal and bitched the entre ten minute walk back to Casa De Frank and just when 1 thought my life was gonna got just a ittle bit easier, Frank goes and torpedo sholgun pisses all over my toot Fk you Frank. Thats low even for you, you pancake sheled dickweed Long story short we got Frank back home and saved the entire town. Frank was not hurt, and we treated the whole situation with care BECAUSE TM A BIGGER MORE MATURE PERSON THAN YOU FRANK YOU SON OF A B'TCH THE META PICTURE awesomesthesia: Meet Frank The Turtle
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lifetimeoftired: summoningraziel: manwiththesquidhat: kichizone: oswinstark: wilwheaton: kittydoom: jimmyfury: pumpkinskull: interruptingpanda: myotpisgay: ninjaboots: gayyourlifemustbe: cloakstone69: president-vanellope: wake up america this is to educate my non-American followers. This really is how the US sees itself. (and yes, 95% of the time, Florida = WHAT?!) In Florida the more North you go, the more “South” you get  In Florida the central part pretends to be the south, the western part pretends to be the northeast and the south pretends to be the west I’m not even kidding you  … Please tell me you guys are kidding.   Florida is like it’s own country I swear I’m from Florida and I can confirm this. Also, South Florida is basically Miami and alligators. oh, i always assumed florida was part of The South? north florida is yes. The rest is not. I’m from Florida, and grew up in SC/NC. Can confirm all true. 👍 Um. This is so wrong. You’re forgetting the part where California sees itself as its own entity. We do not want to be grouped in with everyone else, thanks. clearly none of you have ever met someone from texas That last one is so true I’m from texas and can confirm : The US SHOULD be divided like this Nos Norther Suthwes* Southeost But its act э11ym like this: uest South Whot lifetimeoftired: summoningraziel: manwiththesquidhat: kichizone: oswinstark: wilwheaton: kittydoom: jimmyfury: pumpkinskull: interruptingpanda: myotpisgay: ninjaboots: gayyourlifemustbe: cloakstone69: president-vanellope: wake up america this is to educate my non-American followers. This really is how the US sees itself. (and yes, 95% of the time, Florida = WHAT?!) In Florida the more North you go, the more “South” you get  In Florida the central part pretends to be the south, the western part pretends to be the northeast and the south pretends to be the west I’m not even kidding you  … Please tell me you guys are kidding.   Florida is like it’s own country I swear I’m from Florida and I can confirm this. Also, South Florida is basically Miami and alligators. oh, i always assumed florida was part of The South? north florida is yes. The rest is not. I’m from Florida, and grew up in SC/NC. Can confirm all true. 👍 Um. This is so wrong. You’re forgetting the part where California sees itself as its own entity. We do not want to be grouped in with everyone else, thanks. clearly none of you have ever met someone from texas That last one is so true I’m from texas and can confirm

lifetimeoftired: summoningraziel: manwiththesquidhat: kichizone: oswinstark: wilwheaton: kittydoom: jimmyfury: pumpkinskull: in...

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Friendly Language: penfairy Throwback to the time my poor German teacher had to explain the concept of formal and informal pronouns to a class full of Australians and everyone was scandalised and loudly complained "why can't l treat everyone the same?" "l don't want to be a Sie!" "but being friendly is respectful!'" "wouldn't using 'du' just show I like them?" until one guy conceded "l suppose maybe l'd use Sie with someone like the prime minister, if he weren't such a cunt" and my teacher ended up with her head in her hands saying "you are all banned from using du until I can trust you" deflare God help Japanese teachers in Australia languageoclock if this isnt an accurate representation of australia idk what is derinthemadscientist Australia's reverse-formality respect culture is fascinating. We don't even really think about it until we try to communicate or learn about another culture and the rules that are pretty standard for most of the world just feel so wrong. I went to America this one time and l kept automatically thinking that strangers using 'sir' and 'ma'am' were sassing me Australians could not be trusted with a language with ingrained tiers of formal addresS. The most formal forms would immediately become synonyms for 'go fuck yourself and if you weren't using the most informal version possible within three sentences ot meeting someone they'd take it to mean you hated them hollowedskin 100% true the difference between "scuse me" and "excuse me" is a fistfight Source: penfairy Friendly Language
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