Arguing, Bad, and Community: Fifty Shades Of Grey Gets Bondage
All Wrong. This Girl Nails It.
Many women do not agree with me on this subject but it's important.
submitted 22 hours ago * by ahhidk x6
With Fifty Shades of Grey being made into a movie, I've tried to
raise awareness how this book is not about BDSM, but rather
domestic and sexual abuse. Many women argue that the
relationship in the book is BDSM, but that paints BDSM in a bac
BDSM is a community that believes in safety & comfort. Consent
is always necessary, and partners take care of each other. After
acts and role plays, partners comfort each other to help
transition out of that zone. FSOG does not include any of this.
Mr. Grey gives Anastasia (a then-virgin) an ultimatum; to sign a
contract or leave. She is sexually inexperienced (being a virgin)
and he manipulates that to push her boundaries to make it seem
like the sexually violent things he is doing to her are okay. There
are instances where after an act, he is mad at her for being upset,
but does not comfort her. He uses alcohol to sway her consent
this is by law rape. There is also an instance where she uses the
safe word, yet he continues. That is consent being retracted, and
Christian ignores the retraction of consent. That is sexual assault.
Those are not the only problematic instances. Anastasia begins
to hide things in fear of Christian's anger. He becomes jealous
and easily angered. Anastasia fears for her safety. Experts have
even matched her behavior with that of abused women, in
accordance with the Centers for Disease Control and
Prevention's description of partner violence.
This book completely throws people who participate in BDSM
completely under the bus by misrepresenting BDSM as a whole.
Bad people do sneak into BDSM to find a way to escape
persecution for their violent ways, but the majority of those in
BDSM are not abusive, like this book would have you believe.
This book romanticizes and fetishizes abuse, and painting abuse
in a 'sexy' and 'fun' light is really dangerous for women. 1 in 5
women will experience domestic abuse in their lifetime, that's
why this book should not be defended. Making this behavior
seem okay to accept from a man is dangerous, and people will be
influenced to dabble in 'BDSM,' but not have an actual idea of
what it is, and they will get hurt.
It is up to every individual what they want to read, never anyone
else. The point of this post is to point out how FSOG is
problematic, not to police anyone's reading habits. I know many
women (and men) defend this book and don't understand how it
can be seen as abuse, but it is. And I hope more awareness will
be raised so this does not influence others.
My friend wrote this article on Reddit and it is now going viral everywhere. She really did nail it. Reblog the shit out of this and spread it like wildfire!