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white-throated-packrat: ungodlyobsessions: moistnoodles: i-march-mello: danim4ux: THE SHEET IS MADE OUT OF WOOD TOO Wendell Castle, Ghost Clock. 1985 THAT IS MAHOGANY I thought this was a joke until I read the description WHAT HTE FCUK It’s one of my favorite pieces at the Renwick. It’s a solid block of mahogany and you can see the impression of knobs under the cloth. : The Ghost Clock. I saw this in a museum in D.C. and it blew mind... my Wendell Castle born Emporia, KS 1932; resides Scottsville, NY Ghost Clock 1985 bleached Honduras mahogany and stain Smithsonian American Art Museum, Museum purchase through the Smithsonian Institution Collections Acquisition Program, 1989.68 At first glance, Ghost Clock appears to be a grandfather clock hidden by a large white sheet tied with a rope. A closer look, however, reveals a masterful deception: this entire sculpture was hand-carved from a single block of laminated mahogany. With meticulous detail, Castle re-created in wood the contours of soft, supple cloth, then completed the illusion by bleaching the "drapery" white and staining the base of the "clock" a walnut brown. This work is the last in a series of thirteen clocks the artist created in the 1980s; unlike the others, it lacks an inner mechanism. Its haunting stillness and silence suggest eternity-the absence of time. white-throated-packrat: ungodlyobsessions: moistnoodles: i-march-mello: danim4ux: THE SHEET IS MADE OUT OF WOOD TOO Wendell Castle, Ghost Clock. 1985 THAT IS MAHOGANY I thought this was a joke until I read the description WHAT HTE FCUK It’s one of my favorite pieces at the Renwick. It’s a solid block of mahogany and you can see the impression of knobs under the cloth.
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phan-is-sempiternal: mousathe14: gehayi: profeminist: Tampons are a “luxury item” Once I worked as an intern in the state capital. One of the representatives I worked for was this middle-aged guy. And he hated the tampon and napkin machines in the women’s bathrooms. Hated them. He insisted that they weren’t necessary. I found out why after I’d been working there, oh, about a month. My period started suddenly, as it sometimes does, and I asked to excuse myself to go to the ladies’ room. He wanted to know why. I told him. He started ranting about how lazy women were. How we wasted time. How we were so careless and unhygenic, and that there was no call for that. He finished by telling me that I certainly was NOT going to the ladies’ room and that I was just going to sit there and work. He finished this off with a decisive nod, as if I’d just been told and there could be no possible argument. “If I don’t go,” I said in an overly patient tone, “the blood is going to soak through my pants, stain my new skirt that I just bought, and possibly get on this chair I’m sitting in. I need something to soak up the blood. That’s why I need to go to the bathroom.” His face turned oatmeal-gray; an expression of pure horror spread across his face. He leaned forward and whispered, “Wait, you mean that if you don’t go, you’ll just keep on bleeding? I thought that women could turn it off any time that they wanted!” I thought,  You have got to be kidding. Several horrified whispers later, I learned that he wasn’t. He actually thought a) that women could shut down the menstrual cycle at will, b) that we essentially picked a week per month to spend more time in the bathroom, i.e. to goof off, and c) that napkins and tampons were sex toys paid for by Health and Human Services. I didn’t know the term then, but he believed that tampons were dildos. Which was why he and a good number of his friends considered them luxuries. And that’s how, at twenty, I had to give a talk on menstruation to a middle-aged married state representative who was one of my bosses. American politics, ladies and gentlemen. That’s.., that’s insane. what the fuck did i just read : LUXURY TAX ALK PARK PLACE PAY $75.00 phan-is-sempiternal: mousathe14: gehayi: profeminist: Tampons are a “luxury item” Once I worked as an intern in the state capital. One of the representatives I worked for was this middle-aged guy. And he hated the tampon and napkin machines in the women’s bathrooms. Hated them. He insisted that they weren’t necessary. I found out why after I’d been working there, oh, about a month. My period started suddenly, as it sometimes does, and I asked to excuse myself to go to the ladies’ room. He wanted to know why. I told him. He started ranting about how lazy women were. How we wasted time. How we were so careless and unhygenic, and that there was no call for that. He finished by telling me that I certainly was NOT going to the ladies’ room and that I was just going to sit there and work. He finished this off with a decisive nod, as if I’d just been told and there could be no possible argument. “If I don’t go,” I said in an overly patient tone, “the blood is going to soak through my pants, stain my new skirt that I just bought, and possibly get on this chair I’m sitting in. I need something to soak up the blood. That’s why I need to go to the bathroom.” His face turned oatmeal-gray; an expression of pure horror spread across his face. He leaned forward and whispered, “Wait, you mean that if you don’t go, you’ll just keep on bleeding? I thought that women could turn it off any time that they wanted!” I thought,  You have got to be kidding. Several horrified whispers later, I learned that he wasn’t. He actually thought a) that women could shut down the menstrual cycle at will, b) that we essentially picked a week per month to spend more time in the bathroom, i.e. to goof off, and c) that napkins and tampons were sex toys paid for by Health and Human Services. I didn’t know the term then, but he believed that tampons were dildos. Which was why he and a good number of his friends considered them luxuries. And that’s how, at twenty, I had to give a talk on menstruation to a middle-aged married state representative who was one of my bosses. American politics, ladies and gentlemen. That’s.., that’s insane. what the fuck did i just read
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lolzandtrollz: New And Necessary Punctuation Marks: The "I'm Not Angry" Mark Usage: When you need to be brief, but you're not angry Example We need to talk The Sinceriod Usage When you want to break out of your cycnical shell and be truly honest with someone. Example: Oh, wow, Thank you, This sweater is just what I wanted Sarcastises Usage The opposite of the sinceriod. Use when you want to be sarcastic, but in a way that's totally different and better from whatever system you're using now. Example: Oh, wow. Thank you. This sweater is just what I wanted. Hemi-Demi-Semi Colon Usage: If you don't know when it's appropriate to use a semi-colon, and you're too lazy to learn, you can use this in place of commas, semi-colons, and periods. Pretty much wherever you feel like it Eхample: Now I can act superior and avoid learning anything I'm a stain on humanity Andorpersand Usage: One simple symbol for "and/or" Example: Some people hate the very existence of the phrase "and/or, " but these people are uptight &o stupid Mockwotation Marks Usage: For quoting something that someone didn't say, but totally would say with the way they're being right now. The written equivalent of doing an impression of someone by saying "Look at me, I'm so-and-so" and wiggling your hands by your head, and speaking in a high-pitched voice. I'm Stacey. I'm going to complain about being hungry but not offer any suggestions of my own, said Stacey. Collegelf Superellipsis Usage: For an extreme dramatic pause. When you want the reader to wait a good 20 seconds before reading the next part of the sentence. Maybe even imagine the lights flickering and some thunder crashing. Example: He paused, cautiously, as he approached the superellipsis. On the other side he found... more words! Collegelm Morgan Freemark Usage: Reminds readers that they can read words in any voice they want, so maybe they should read these words in Morgan Freeman's voice. Example: And so, Kevin took this big swig of vodka and straight-up ran head-first into the wall you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com lolzandtrollz: New And Necessary Punctuation Marks

lolzandtrollz: New And Necessary Punctuation Marks

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the more you know: ilthat TIL that due to their small brains koalas are unable to perform complex, unfamiliar tasks such as eat leaves off of flat surfaces. via reddit.com toast-potent how are they even alive kickin-jeans eucalyptus trees are full of flammable oil that causes the trees to explode during forest fires, killing other trees and spreading its seeds to grow in their place koalas survive solely because nothing else in their environment Wants To Eat The Fucking Bombs humandisastersquad WROTE THIS POST#god dont get me fuckin started#the NUMBER of times ive Gone Off abt koalas in zooarch class#on a scale of koalas to wombats how good is ur marsupial at Being Alive#hey hey u know what else? koalas are s0 picky with their diet that theyll only eat the leaves of one (1) type of eucalypt#and even then ONLY specimens of that tree that are within a very tight geographic range of where the koala was born#the rescue centre in my city? they have to ship branches from all over the state bc koalas there physically Will Not Eat anything thats not#from their very very small very precise home range#theyd rather starve to death than try leaves from like the next suburb over#i have 60 other reasons why koalas spit in the face of natural selection hmu if you want YELLING i cant be bothered to list them all here#god theyre so incomprehensibly dumb. god#HEY ALSO the reason their brains are so small is bc YEah the one SINGLE species of tree they eat is incredibly toxic#their diet consists of 1 food and it is Brain-Shrinking Poison (@reyroace) reyroace oh u like that? try this one: the main natural cause of death in koalas is starvation, because 1) their dumbass teeth are SHIT. to be a herbivore and chomp cellulose all day u need some real tough grinders in there, and almost every other herbivore in nature has SOME sort of dental adaptation to make sure they dont run out of tooth by the time they hit middle age. horses have big tall teeth, wombat teeth grow forever, kangaroos have got a little conveyor belt system goin on, etc etc everyone's doin SOMETHING except fuckign koalas. idiots have tiny fuckin shortass normal teeth that do an okay job for maybe like 15 years and then wear down and leave them with ridiculous fuckin useless old man gums that do shit all. but thats fine bc all koalas do anyway is sit in trees and sleep 22hrs a day then wake up and scream and eat poison and they do this all day every day until they run out of teeth at which point they just fall out of the tree and die 2) idiots can't die any other fuckin way bc nothing in nature wants to eat them bc their bodies are chocker block with LITERAL poison. fuckin USELESS their flesh just sits around and slowly rots bc its too gross-tasting and toxic for any animal w half a brain cell to think abt going near it. have yall ever seen koala viscera. bc i have and let me tell u that shit is RANK. looks like the inside of a smoker's lung from some fuckdamn nicabate ad bc the tannins in eucalypt leaves stain their organs like khaki black. like some fuckin darklsteve irwin costume well better piss ur way right off from this one anti-steve bc thats a natural defense mechanism meant to warn u that koalas should in no way be alive and if u touch them theyll drag u into their stupid evolutionary dead-end where they get to sit around all day doin fuck all and pumpin themselves full of brain-killing poison while we run around makin them our olympic games mascots and pretending theyre cute and honest to god looking for ways to save them from the brink of extinction which actually is unnecessary bc a) theyre not really endangered at all, nature is a fuckign miracle and b) the drongos clearly want to die so i say let em reyroace by the way i never elaborated on "koalas sit in trees all day screaming" but heres a lil fuckin. heres a fun nugget heres a lil soundbyte this is what koalas sound like https://www.youtube.com/watch?v-jmeBQVQlsTU https://www.youtube.com/watch?v-O0CAx1jLbJk gallusrostromegalus My favorite story about Koalas comes from the book The Killer Koala Humorous Australian Bush Stories" By Kenneth Cook, which is an excellently good book with some A+ storytelling. he describes the Koala's "Anti-Dingo Defense", wherein they latch on to the belly of the dingo to slow down the rate at which they are being consumed alive by starving canid, gradually trn themselves around until they've got thier head in the Dingo's crotch, and then procede to BITE THE SHIT out of the Dingo's Tender Bits, whilst clowing at the ribs and projectile-evacuating thier bowels, Mr. Cook found out about the Anti-Dingo Defense beause he was tricked into 'rescuing' a bunch of koalas off an island by the promise of a Hot Date with a young lady, wondered why they were all being given armored aprons to handle the koalas with, only to find out firsthand, which pretty much ruined his prospects of a date. teratomarty What I'm getting is that koalas are basically Australian-grade Death Sloths. the more you know
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Damn girl: Damn, girl, you look good! Whatcha doin' later? Can I get yo numbah? That's how all women should feel about their body This is how everyone should feel about their body I understand your point, but almost all men already do feel this way about their bodies and hardly any women do Stephen I can't even breathe for fear of inhaling the radiating, gaseous idiocy your unleashing into the world Men report being upset about their bodies at similar rates to women, from 15% to 40%. They also have similar rates of several eating disorders, and much higher rates of muscle dysmorphia, which is just as unhealthy as any eating disorder. Body dysmorphic disorder is a genderless condition. They're also completely ignored in the media and by a culture perpetuated by fucking pieces of shit like you I know several men who have considered suicide because they hate the way they look You are an abomination who has likely never met a man other than yourself and I am laughing so hard that your shitty, abortion of a blog advertises itself as using logic and having arguments. I doubt that you've been particularly exposed to either logic or arguments in your extraordinarily sheltered life And thanks for making it so easy to ignore your abominable opinion by proving that you have lived such a privileged, hallowed life to have not known as many men who hate their bodies as women t,dr. Find jesus. Ask the Wizard of Oz for a soul. Learn how to statistics. And oh take all your fucking biases towards men and put them in the trash where they belong you utterly repugnant living stain of filth. Damnn Shit that was brutal Damn girl
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In the Valley of Stars: stardewfairy stardew valley gothic .the time passes so quickly yet so slowly. it's been a week, it's been months, it's been years. you do not age. nobody ages. the children don't grow up. you start forgetting everything about your life before you live here. you've always lived heree when it rains, you hear strange faraway howls and screams that fill you with primal terror. you never stay outside for long on rainy days your crops grow within days. you plant seeds in the ground. ten days later, the fields are overgrown with corn you find things when you dig in the dirt. roots, clay, stone. books skulls that don't look like they belong to any animal you know there are only two channels on tv. the weather and the fortune teller. it doesn't matter when you turn it on, the weather program is only just starting. it will be sunny tomorrow" the weatherman says with empty eyes and a too-wide smile. you flip to the fortune teller's channel. "the spirits are in a bad mood today" she says, "be careful you shiver, and decide not to go to the mines today .have you always been so strong? you can chop down a tree in minutes and you can carry hundreds of stones in your backpack. .you wake up at exactly 6 every morning. you can't wake up earlier, or later sometimes your scarecrows are not planted where they were yesterday .you hear whispers in the old community center. you can almost seee something indiscernable out of the corner of your eye. you bring offerings, hoping to appease the spirits, today it's winter you swear two days ago it was summer the berries you found in the woods have a strange metallic taste their juices stain your mouth red. you keep eating them anyway .nobody ages. nobody ages. nobody ages. what year is it? you keep bringing offerings in the old community center. honey milk, wine, peaches, dead animals. there are never enough offerings the fruit bats that live in the small cave near your house leave fruit for you. they bring you out of season fruit, exotic fruit, fruit that comes from halfway across the world, fruit that you've never seen before .the wizard granted you the power to understand the spirits that live in the old community center. now you wish he hadn't. every night when you get home, you lock the door and close the windows. every morning when you wake up, your cat is somehow inside the house .the train passes through stardew valley sometimes, but never stops. you can hear howls coming from it. you try talking to the people in the village, but they always seem to be repeating the same things. "do you have any blueberries?", asks lewis for the 14th time this month there are things in the mines. don't go into the mines we're insulated from the rest of the world here savs demetrius now that you think of it, you have never received a letter or a phone call from the outside world. is there even an outside world? there is a bath house, north of the town. there is never anyone there, but the electricity works and the water runs. when you enter the locker room, there is a bathing suit just your size waiting for you the water in the big bath is milky. you can't see the bottom. you enter it anyway. when you exit, you feel happy and energised. you have nothing to worry about. come back soon! . the bus to calico desert is out of service. the road to calico desert is out of service. do not go to calico desert. do not ask about calico desert. do no think about calico desert. there is no calico desert. you are out late at night, gathering berries. at exactly two am, something knocks you out. you wake up in your bed the following morning. don't think about it. go to sleep you try staying up past two am the following night, only to be knocked out again. go to sleep. go to sleep. go to sleep you have been here for a couple of weeks, or maybe for decades nothing changes. you can't die. you can't die. you can't die Source: stardewfairy 5,000 notes In the Valley of Stars

In the Valley of Stars

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