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Ass, Beer, and Condom: 41 .d 70% 1:17 AM Saturday 1140 PM all i want to know is if that pic is photoshopped oh fuck wait the rest of them are i didn't even notice that Or maybe l actually died in a selfie related shark attack In 2018 anything's possible fr tho you got some quality photoshop skills Though my usual Tinder claim to fame is my poetry writing Gimme a format pick between Shakespearean sonnet or Dr Seuss poem and then l'd need a topic oh shit seuss for sure write aboutittt stupid frat boys Today 1:13 AM At Who University's campus downtown, studious students awaited sundown For during the day they're the learning ish sort. but after night fell? Watch Fraternity At Sigma Ki Kappa Phi Epsilon Nu a Vineyard-Vine chino store stepped into view A stack of red cups looming tall on his the Cat in the Frat prowled for Whogirls He saw a lone girl and assessed her cup size and then, in this order, gawked ass, chest and eyes He waltzed in on over and offered her and said "come with me, oh the places you'll cum! They snuck to a bedroom and passed Mister Grinch whose hazing machine dragged six pledges by winch. Its arms and its knobs fed the pledges and doubly increased their fraternity Just by the hazing in haze of his own, the Lorax sat still undeniably stoned. A pledge wandered up.. 'there's something I need. The Lorax did smile: 1 speak for the We ve got Xannys and Mollys and cocaine galore and ketamine, mushrooms and DMT-4 There's indicas, indigos, everywhich and every eigth bought, have a free hit of speed Horton popped pills called Pill 1 and Pill and then followed up with Pill Red and Pill Blue His world washed away as he tripped for three hours hearing small voices that spoke from puff fiowers. The Cat in the Frat roled off well what's-her-name and let her slip out with red visible He looked at his sheets and saw stains left by beer, and thought should I was them? Oh, maybe next year He'd wanted a girl from each stop on Srat Row with Ki Frappa Sig down just five more to go, He put back the condom he told her he'd wear And then set on foot for the cleanup The party had ended and Whos had gone home, with red cup footsteps creaking sticky beer foam Sprawled on the floor was that poor Sam I Am, and someone's puked-up rancid green eggs and ham. The Cat in the Frat called the cleaning which rolled and ka-sputtered its way through the scene Its arms and gloved hands dusted swept, and wipe dried and even did know to turn Sam on his At Sigma Ki Kappa Phi Epsilon Nu, The party lifecycle began thus anew. Tuesday was done and yet Wednesday drew near... The Cat had to run and go buy some more beer THAT WAS FUCKING AMAZING OH MY FUCKINF GOD I LVOE YOU Type a message Frat Life
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Clock, Countdown, and Energy: buying peaches is so stressful because you have to consume them so quickly... it's like the moment the cashier types in that number the alpha peach turns to its brothers in the bags and says "alright listen up boys, it's time to remember your training. i want to see immense bruising by sundown. i want to see you near inedible by sunrise. remember it is better to die a free man than to be eaten." you gotta wolf down all of your peaches at the check out counter while the trader joe's employees eagerly look at the Peach Consumption Countdown Clock and cheer you on. these peaches have sensors on them that can tell when they come into contact with human hands so they can begin their self-destruct sequence like you're in a spy movie and the peach just relayed a message to you about the whereabouts of jimmy hoffa's decayed remains je-suis-hetalia Jimmy Hoffa is likely dead m4ge this response carries so much chaotic cursed energy. jimmy hoffa was declared dead in 1982 after disappearing in 1975. he was born in 1913, meaning he would be the miraculous age of 105 today if he wasn't dead. "likely dead." the fact that it's a hetalia blog trying to tell me that he is likely dead. the fact that i specifically mention his decayed corpse in my post so there is literally no reason for someone to alert me that he is "likely" deceased. the fact that this hetalia blog is trying to tell this to me, a person who up until recently literally worked for the international brotherhood of teamsters as a person in charge of handling their historical records. i spent two years of my life answering phone calls from people asking me if i personally knew what happened to jimmy hoffa's body. ive spent a significantly longer amount of time trying to forget that hetalia exists. my entire career as a hetalia faceboolk roleplayer at the age of 11 just flashed through my eyes. i legitimately cannot express how much this response has effected me. ive been staring at it for7 minutes. i feel like ive entered the twilight zone je-suis-hetalia I don't ever remember writing that when did I write that m4ge everything about this is cursed peaches

peaches

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Chicago, Definitely, and Racism: Mikki Kendall @Karnythia I always forget that people think majority white areas in the US happened organically. Or that the majority white population is an accident 7/2/17, 7:14 PM 187 Retweets 354 Likes 10 Mikki Kendall @Karnythia 1h Replying to @Karnythia Quick & dirty history lesson, without restrictive housing covenants & sundown towns & lynching & race barriers to immigration? Well... Mikki Kendall@Karnythia 1h The US as a whole would look a lot like Chicago. POC populations would be higher, the country would be majority POC 40 Mikki Kendall @Karnythia 1h Throw in the attempted genocide of Indigenous nations & the stealing of their lands & you start to get an idea of how the US got this way. 2 1 36 Mikki Kendall@Karnythia 1h Now, this is why I get so annoyed at the myth that the US was ever a "white" country. It wasn't. Stolen lands, stolen people on those lands 4 m 47 113 Mikki Kendall @Karnythia 1h Thousands of racist attempts to make it a white country later, all that shit did was delav the inevitable Mikki Kendall @Karnythia 1h Thousands of racist attempts to make it a white country later, all that shit did was delay the inevitable Rome wasn't all white either n31 O 82 Mikki Kendall @Karnythia 1h In fact one of the ways that imperialism & colonization ends up playing out is that eventually the "Other" outnumbers the colonizer. 10 34 V 77 Mikki Kendall @Karnythia 1h And hey, if you built your economy on taking resources from the people you marginalized while building a myth of opportunity? We want in 2 28 O 76 Mikki Kendall @Karnythia 1h Sooner or later? This is what marginalized people have to say Welcome to this stage! odinsblog: odinsblog: jazminsthoughts: A short lesson from @karnythia. I feel like even if this wasn’t a majority white country, white supremacy would still definitely function in a way that preserves itself. Bringing this back because redlining isn’t just some old-time practice from the past. Redlining is still going on today. In 2018. Banks are currently turning away qualified black homebuyers from affluent white neighborhoods. Banks are still denying home loans to black people with excellent credit when we try to buy in mostly white neighborhoods. Video: https://youtu.be/AqaCsJXUehQ It’s organized, institutional racism. Banks will give huge home loans to poorly qualified white people to gentrify historically black neighborhoods, but not the other way around.
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Beautiful, Bless Up, and Chicago: l just rescued this beautiful girl, and she is sleeping inside for the first time in her life Reddit u/CollectiveOfCells @DrSmashlove So I’m texting with my lil homegirl in Toronto and I’m like “aye y’all got Chil Fil A in Toronto 🤔” and she like “nah” and I’m like “aight when u slide thru Chicago it’s on” and she like “smash! We don’t fvck with Chik Fil A! 😤” And that’s when I had to stop her right there, bruv. See I don’t blame u Canadians because y’all really woke the long way but I gotta splain sum real quick. We all out here tryina make things right. U feel me? We all taking a stand. Against inequality. Against intolerance. I feel that. My fist in the air too, sis. BUT REVOLT HAS A LINE THAT CANNOT BE CROSSED AND THAT LINE IS CHIK FIL A 😐😂. Do I like they stance on same sex marriage? No. Do I like they tenders? Also no. I LOVE THEY TENDERS, BRUV. I PEEL OPEN THAT SRIRACHA SAUCE AND I PEEL OPEN THAT POLYNESIAN SAUCE AND I DUNK + TWIRL MY MEAT IN BOTH SAUCES - IN ALTERNATING FASHION - AS MY HEART (and belly, and eye) SHED A SINGLE TEAR OF HAPPINESS. But Smash, what if tomorrow they tweeted ‘Chik Fil A supports the Trump Travel Ban, go back to your country 😤.’ Well see now sis, extraordinary measures require extraordinary responses. I would go directly to my jeweler Tony on Wabash. I would say “Tony my dude imma need a cross.” Tony: “smash...you don’t wear crosses(?)” Me: “TONY GIMME THE CROSS AND STOP AXING QUESTIONS. MAKE SURE IT GOT JESUS ON IT. Put diamonds in the thorns too 🙂.” And I would stroll to Chik Fil A on State Street. And put that cross on, go in and say “two orders of tenders and a peach milkshake please.” The black cashier would eye me. I would eye her back. I would look down. I would look back up and see her shaking her head: “smash...I served u daily during Ramadan. DAILY. In here like a crack addict at sundown in your suit - 8:32 pm on the dot I’m handing you tenders. And you’re back? After what they said about the trump ban? Wearing a CROSS(?)” And I would, with a solemn stare, mouth the following words “sis...issa time to fight and it’s a time to eat. The only thing standing between me and the dinner God hath planned for me is you. YOU COULD CATCHETH THESE HANDS. Glory be to Jesus.” BLESS UP 😩😍😂😂😂
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Bitch, Confused, and Food: Hi Hello hello! Lol what's up? All right enough chitchat let's put our cards on the table. No, I've never swiped right before. No, none of these pictures are of me Yes, I've been on the lamb since '09 I need to know if I can trust you. I'm so confused Confused? No. Confused was what I was when I walked into that bank brandishing my dads smith and wessun at the ripe young age of 16 The world doesn't forgive Chrissy. It's a cold, hard bitch. What are you trying to get out of this conversation? 3 things: A. Can you provide asylum? B. can you cook? I am lactose intolerant. C. Do you love me Um I only just met you Listen Chrissy, I took a gamble on you. I need you to pull through or this could mean the end of the road for me. Let's see, do you know morse code? Also, you're going to need an alias. How about Brookfield? WHAT IS HAPPENING I go by the Salamander. I am tall and I have black hair and very pale skin. I will be wearing a disguise when we meet. Look for the signal: I will sneeze three times. You pretend to take a call. I will leave; you follow me at a reasonable distance. Is this understood, Brookfield? Yes? Excellent. Our rendezvous will be at this time tomorrow. We need to be out of the city by sundown. Can you drive stick? No I cannot This really throws a wrench in our plans, Brookfield. Not to worry, 'll drive, but be prepared to switch seats in the unlikely event that we are stopped by lavw enforcement. Side note food should be prepared when we get back to your quarters, before we leave What are you making? I will remind you, I'm lactose intolerant I'm still really confused It means l'm allergic to dairy products. Please don't use any of them when preparing the meal No I know what lactose intolerant means... But what's happening in general It's up to you, I'll eat anything as long as there isn't dairy in it. not about the food... Why are we having this conversation Don't get all philosophical on me, Brookfield. I need focused, sharp as a tack. Nimble, like a cat. None of this existential mumbo jumbo means anything if we don't pull this off you PULL WHAT OFF Are you in, or are you out?
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